Disliking everyone you meet in Thailand...

[MrWorldwide]

Khun Falang, there's good and bad everywhere - lets not demonise (or sanctify...) anyone based on stereotypes. I've met some sensational Westerners all over Asia, including a French lady who was busy setting up a business in the 'sleepy backwater' of Nanning in Southern China, but they all set themselves apart by being focused on the opportunities in a given country - here the focus often seems to be on the obstacles. As I said in the OP - glass half full vs crushed into your face.

[wprime]

You dont sound very worldwide to me,and i think u listen to much on forums.The absolute minority of expats moan i9n real life,get out more and listen not read silly forums,where guys have nothing better to do than troll.

Agreed, it's just online that the moaners tend to be the loudest so they seem to be a majority.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

OK - you are prepared to make the effort to make that point, and yet you see nothing wrong with people who have relocated their entire lives to Thailand displaying an extremely bilious attitude to the country and it's people ? 'The world in general' exists well beyond this forum, and none of the regulars on my other Thai-based forum display the same level of pathological hatred towards the Thai people as I've seen here. If you actually took the time to read ALL of that first post, you will see that I explicitly apologised to the TVers who *do* contribute a great deal of useful information in the visa and health sections, among others - if my attitude to other Farang was as grim as you would have us believe, why would I even bother ?

I think it's fear of the unknown.

Very few foreigners actually mix and interact with Thai people.

Apart from the woman they sleep with, most foreign men have absolutely no contact with Thais on any level.

I actually doubt that you have much contact with Thai people either, you just like to argue with other foreigners.

I have no problem with elderly people who refuse to interact with people around them, it's common all over the world.

Edited July 18, 2013 by AnotherOneAmerican

[PaullyW]

A big vote of thanks to StreetCowboy, thaimlord and others who have taken the time to actually read my post and formulate a thoughtful response.

OP, didn't you mean to write -

"A big vote of thanks to StreetCowboy, thaimlord and others who have taken the time to actually read my post and who agree with me." ??

I must say, I'm a tad surprised with your OP and your interest in the topic. Especially considering your questionable early posts around race. But, I do applaud you for shifting gears to create a new internet identify. You've done well.

Cheers

[iancnx]

A big vote of thanks to StreetCowboy, thaimlord and others who have taken the time to actually read my post and formulate a thoughtful response.

Post #42 remains extant. My suspicion that the OP and StreetCowboy are the same person stands! Sad sad people!

[geronimo]

Am in total agreement re: the negativity on TV. It is hanging there, like an early morning mist it seems to permeate into the very bones of some of us! I look at the positive though, all that negative energy that is being dissipated, to be read by us all, strengthens my resolve to stay positive. When I have to listen to someone bending my ear about the sh*t that's happened, I think to myself that I am so fortunate not to be like that!

The trick is to be able to find the positive in everything!

[PaullyW]

You will never have a life anywhere@ what a waste of flesh you are.Get a balcony as soon as and do a leap! I have met happier better ajusted people in the gutter..

Your advice would be better received if it was more precisely targeted. Who specifically are you talking to? Can you imagine the mortification if the wrong chap topped hisself on your advice?

For my part, I've never met anyone in the gutter, and if I had, I hope that they and I would have the decency not to recollect it in public.

Personally, I like to think everyone has some value, if only to remind ourselves that our own misfortunes are trivial and insignificant, and that the foibles and prejudices of our own acquaintances pale in the shadow of the idiocy one can find on the internet.

SC

Shakespeare ?

Yeah, this SC character only communicates in riddles. I guess it's cute. Perhaps a predilection for an old, bygone era.

[StreetCowboy]

One thing I have learned from ThaiVisa is that even though we speak English, the British, the Australians and the Americans are nothing at all alike. I know what Thailand is like, but most of my knowledge of British and Australian people is from this website. (I have been to England once to visit a Thai friend).

From what I had learnt from this website, I approached my trip to the USA with some trepidation, but in fact I found the people without exception pleasant and polite - at airport security, at immigration, at baggage handling, the taxi driver...

The colleagues I was visiting were hospitable and enthusiastically co-operative

You would be well-advised not to rely solely on web sites such as this for your information about places you've never been and people that you've never met - TV may be a great source of information, but perhaps not such a great source for judgement or opinion.

SC

[iancnx]

Khun Falang, there's good and bad everywhere - lets not demonise (or sanctify...) anyone based on stereotypes. I've met some sensational Westerners all over Asia, including a French lady who was busy setting up a business in the 'sleepy backwater' of Nanning in Southern China, but they all set themselves apart by being focused on the opportunities in a given country - here the focus often seems to be on the obstacles. As I said in the OP - glass half full vs crushed into your face.

Very well done OP .... It was only a question of time before you came back flaming and trolling. Most of us here think you (and your other identities) are really really sad. I do feel sorry for you if you are truly sat in Australia devoting so much time to this your chosen subject. My daughter is doing her Masters in psychology .... I am thinking of sending her a few TV links of posts that she might make use of. OP your posts will be amongst the top 5. Get a life for goodness sake.

[SteeleJoe]

One thing I have learned from ThaiVisa is that even though we speak English, the British, the Australians and the Americans are nothing at all alike. I know what Thailand is like, but most of my knowledge of British and Australian people is from this website. (I have been to England once to visit a Thai friend).

Are you serious?

Classic.

[louse1953]

Dear OP.

I'll tell what I'll do. Next time you are at a loose end in Bangkok and wish to see another side of life, one which is in direct contrast to the one you seem to believe is all inclusive of the Ex Pat 'Community' here. I extend an invitation to you. (outer BKK Suburbs) Get in touch and come out here for a drink and BBQ in my Soi, Moo Baan. Sing along with us, as the blokes drag out their guitars and belt out numbers from CCR, Eagles, John Denver, Bee Gees, Everly Bros, Mamas and Papas, Lionel Ritchie, etc. When we are not doing that we talk about things most blokes anywhere like to talk about - Football, (even if it is English Soccer), food, work, females and sex, alcohol, music, cars, home improvement and maintenance, just about everything. Not a lot different to what most blokes at home talk about at BBQs and social gatherings. We even visit the odd Karaoke Bar or Snooker Room when we are in the mood. We consciously avoid Thai Politics though. For obvious reasons. Too polarising.

I have quite a diverse group of good friends.

One of them, who holds a Senior Management position at Saha Farm Lop Buri, at Sat Night Drinks last week he was telling me about what was going on up there, showing me the pics he personally took on his Galaxy S4 of the recent fire damage at the factory. The slaughter area destroyed, 3 machines at 2 Mil Baht each, plus all the overheads had fallen in, but the Sausage Manufacturing area survived. Another has his own Electrical, Security and Access control company with some big contracts in progress such as Mahindol Uni, another is a Childrens Toy Importer and supplies Villa Markets etc., an interior designer, a 'rag trade' wholesaler, a very, very senior government official, a pest controller, a professional driver, bookings manager for one of the most famous hotels in the Kingdom, Thai Inter Ground Crew, even a Copper. And they are all good friends. Plus their wives and children. I attend Tam Boons, Buats, Weddings, Funerals, weekends at the beach, concerts and many other social events at the invitation of my thai friends. I truly love it. Never a cross word or a blue.

I don't have much to do with other farangs here, simply because there are none around here. I can go months without talking face to face with one. Doesn't mean I am anti social. On the contrary. I am quite a sociable person. Not so good at singing though, but I do my best.

I treat everyone with respect - and, a certain amount of trust, until they may prove themselves unworthy of it.

I am not a mug. I have been traveling and living in Asia now for a total of 43 years. 30 years married to a Thai. (My 26 YO Australian/Thai son is staying with me at the moment). 10 years experience in Oz as a Thai Restaurant Owner, Since I was 16, every girl friend I ever had, bar two, were in Asia. I came very close to marrying a Filippina in 1979. I still think about her from time to time. She was a great girl. As a matter of a fact when I first came to Asia, the girls I had 'relations' with, would, if it were nowadays, qualify to be listed on a Sex Offenders Register!

How I feel, think and live my life, and what I post here about Asia/Thailand I do so, mostly from experience - not what I read here or in a book, nor what I see on (my Samsung) TV,

I would not take this forum too seriously. Narks are everywhere. Sometimes the best reaction is no reaction at all.

As I said, give me a call. (BTW, everyone here drinks Whisky & Soda, or to a much lesser extent, beer. If you want anything else then you will have to BYO. Sorry 'bout that.

In closing, The invitation is there. To quote and old Thai saying - 'Up to you'. I would like you to see that all is not as bad or stereotypical as you think. My glass if neither half full nor half empty - It's Chokkas!

Count me in cobber,similiar lifestyle.More rock+roll for me.Been knocking around Asia for 4 decades and still love it.

[MrWorldwide]

Khun Falang, there's good and bad everywhere - lets not demonise (or sanctify...) anyone based on stereotypes. I've met some sensational Westerners all over Asia, including a French lady who was busy setting up a business in the 'sleepy backwater' of Nanning in Southern China, but they all set themselves apart by being focused on the opportunities in a given country - here the focus often seems to be on the obstacles. As I said in the OP - glass half full vs crushed into your face.

Very well done OP .... It was only a question of time before you came back flaming and trolling. Most of us here think you (and your other identities) are really really sad. I do feel sorry for you if you are truly sat in Australia devoting so much time to this your chosen subject. My daughter is doing her Masters in psychology .... I am thinking of sending her a few TV links of posts that she might make use of. OP your posts will be amongst the top 5. Get a life for goodness sake.

Right - I'm flaming and trolling under several aliases. Other than SC, I'd be interested to know exactly which board members you believe I'm masquerading as, or is it simply everyone who has the audacity to agree with me ? I'm sure the board admins could check the IP logs to confirm that each of those posts came from a different part of the world, but has it really come to that ?

I wonder what prompted your daughter to chose psychology as her profession ?

[MrWorldwide]

iancnx, I would add that the sum total of your entire argument throughout this thread has been that I am a 'flaming troll'. That's it - no attempt to address any of my initial post or any other point - pro or con - made since. The last time I checked, that strategy has been deemed a form of trolling on TV. Might be time you re-examined your posting etiquette.

Edited July 19, 2013 by MrWorldwide

[iancnx]

OK OP.

First the thread title, did you honestly expect to get a great response. No, for sure, you realised this would put the backs up of the majority who read it. Proof. 95% of responders are against you.

Second, your opening paragraph.... quite obviously crafted to aggravate others. No need to dissect any further. Proof. 95% of responders are against you.

You suggest TV should check IP addresses to make sure you and others are a genuine posters. You flatter yourself. I should imagine the admin and moderator staff have far better things to do with their valuable time.

You have said your piece, I have responded and now draw a line under it. I will not post in this thread again. You have already been judged by a majority.

Be sure of one thing though, you will be challenged again and again if you start other threads specifically designed to aggravate others.

[Freedomfighter]

If I had known what I now know about Thailand after 7 years here, I would NOT have relocated here. Im thankful for the many varied interesting experiences here, good and bad. However I prefer a more higher quality of life, saner, less corrupt and hypocitical society.

Nevertheless, I have encountered some wonderfully friendly and open people, staff, students, colleagues etc. But they are the exception, not the rule.

So I will be leaving at the end of the year with no regrets. Ariverderci!

[Docno]

You will never have a life anywhere@ what a waste of flesh you are.Get a balcony as soon as and do a leap! I have met happier better ajusted people in the gutter..

Your advice would be better received if it was more precisely targeted. Who specifically are you talking to? Can you imagine the mortification if the wrong chap topped hisself on your advice?

For my part, I've never met anyone in the gutter, and if I had, I hope that they and I would have the decency not to recollect it in public.

Personally, I like to think everyone has some value, if only to remind ourselves that our own misfortunes are trivial and insignificant, and that the foibles and prejudices of our own acquaintances pale in the shadow of the idiocy one can find on the internet.

SC

Shakespeare ?

Yeah, this SC character only communicates in riddles. I guess it's cute. Perhaps a predilection for an old, bygone era.

Really? Not hard to figure out what he's saying at all. In fact, it's a refreshing change from the grunts and disguised expletives used in other posts. I can see that you can use big words yourself :-)

[Docno]

I think the OP asks a completely valid question and posters who say things like 'so don't read the stuff' are missing the point. There are clearly quite a number of people here who:

1. Have little good to say about Thailand and Thai culture
2. Have little good to say about Thai people (mostly Thai males, but Thai females also take a hammering at times)
3. Have little good to say about farangs living in Thailand.

So the obvious and reasonable question is why would they choose to live in Thailand if they feel this way (because, yes, they have chosen to live and can theoretically go home if they want). I really don't get it.

Is this not a logical/reasonable question? If it is, what is the answer?

[slipperylobster]

If I had known what I now know about Thailand after 7 years here, I would NOT have relocated here. Im thankful for the many varied interesting experiences here, good and bad. However I prefer a more higher quality of life, saner, less corrupt and hypocitical society.

Nevertheless, I have encountered some wonderfully friendly and open people, staff, students, colleagues etc. But they are the exception, not the rule.

So I will be leaving at the end of the year with no regrets. Ariverderci!

Finally...a man who had the courage to move on. I had to leave the philippines after 15 years for the same reasons.....now my 2nd year in Thailand....but moving on to the next venue in March. One more last hurrah around the country after the rainy season. Mae Hon Son (my gals resort), doing Rayong, Koh Chang, Sihanoukville, then over to the Adaman Sea (missed some spots last time). Giving up the house in Udon (Renting) and doing the monthly condotels in each area. I did this my first year, but somehow got stuck in Udon. Enjoyed it, but time for changes. Got the gal in tow, her truck and her scooter attached. Selling the Phantom in the Pic though.

[theblether]

I think the OP asks a completely valid question and posters who say things like 'so don't read the stuff' are missing the point. There are clearly quite a number of people here who:

1. Have little good to say about Thailand and Thai culture
2. Have little good to say about Thai people (mostly Thai males, but Thai females also take a hammering at times)
3. Have little good to say about farangs living in Thailand.

So the obvious and reasonable question is why would they choose to live in Thailand if they feel this way (because, yes, they have chosen to live and can theoretically go home if they want). I really don't get it.

Is this not a logical/reasonable question? If it is, what is the answer?

The answer is.......

Some people are not happy until they are unhappy.

Seriously.

.

[wayned]

If you don't like yourself, you will never like anybody else!

[slipperylobster]

If you don't like yourself, you will never like anybody else!

True...I like myself more than anybody likes me....

[Docno]

One final point...

I was going to start a thread about good experiences in Thailand, but work got in the way. But I was going to describe my positive experiences from just last during a road trip around Ubon.

• The two young ladies travelling from Bangkok who paid a boatman for a ride that my faen and I just had with them. They were simply being friendly and generous ... no ulterior motives.
• The old school friend's of my faen in her vllage who shared their whisky with us and tried to talk to me in English and put up with my lousy Thai.
• The Thai strangers at a park who helped me when I slipped during a climb and injured my hand. [And the Thai guy at the pharmacy who was friendly and showed a lot of concern].
• The ladies in the market who laughingly asked to try their food for free to see if the farang could handle the spiciness (I could)
• The lady who rented me the car at a lower-than-posted rate because I've rented before and will do so again
• My faen's father who shyly (because he speaks no English) and genuinely came to me to thank me for giving him some money to hire people to help him in the fields, money that equated to less than an hour of my income but got him a10 people for a day.
• And the smiling ladies at the airport ticket counter who assigned me more expensive seats on the plane at no extra charge because I am taller than average (among Thais).

I'm not so naive as to believe that everyone in any country is well-intentioned ... but I have had very few bad experiences with people in Thailand, and many more good experiences than I am used to (I've lived for over 10 years each in Australia, Canada, and Singapore, and have done a fair bit of traveling).

Perhaps, as others have suggested, our own attitudes and behaviour determine the experiences we have. John Lennon called it Instant Karma ...

[Docno]

I think the OP asks a completely valid question and posters who say things like 'so don't read the stuff' are missing the point. There are clearly quite a number of people here who:

1. Have little good to say about Thailand and Thai culture
2. Have little good to say about Thai people (mostly Thai males, but Thai females also take a hammering at times)
3. Have little good to say about farangs living in Thailand.

So the obvious and reasonable question is why would they choose to live in Thailand if they feel this way (because, yes, they have chosen to live and can theoretically go home if they want). I really don't get it.

Is this not a logical/reasonable question? If it is, what is the answer?

The answer is.......

Some people are not happy until they are unhappy.

Seriously.

.

Seriously, you are right. A professor friend of mine from the US did some groundbreaking (highly cited) research in the 80s on job satisfaction (happiness at work). Previously, people had believe that employees are unhappy because there's something wrong with the job/company. But by studying people over many years across many job changes, he was able to show that people who are unhappy in one job will tend to be unhappy in other (and he later showed that there was a genetic component to this ... some people are born complainers). I'm just wondering why so many of them seem to end up on Thaivisa and perhaps in Thailand itself. Is it that they initially expect Thailand to be a paradise in which they'll finally find peace and happiness and acceptance, and it turns out not to be quite so perfect (i.e., like in any country, you have to work at it)? Or do they always carry their cynicism around with them like an old piece of luggage...?

[theblether]

Perhaps, as others have suggested, our own attitudes and behaviour determine the experiences we have. John Lennon called it Instant Karma ...

John Lennon was very wise.

Some people radiate kindness and good heartedness, other people radiate bitterness and twistedness.

Some people have the basic civility and manners to go through life being polite and well thought of, others don't know what it means to be well mannered.

I watched a recent example of a rude aggressive farang reducing a Thai waitress to tears as she couldn't understand what he was saying. I was sitting four feet away and I couldn't understand him either.

The problem was entirely his, the end result was a young lady in tears and him muttering about stupid useless Thais.

It took her a while to compose herself, by this point the guys companions had launched into a verbal against him for being so rude. Good on them.

I lay you odds it hasn't made a blind bit of difference though, he'll still be as bitter today, and he'll still be blaming her.

[slipperylobster]

A man once said...

"Better to remain silent and thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt!"

I foolishly said..."I'm so sorry..., were you talking to me?"

I hope this axiom does not apply to everyone... and if not, who would be the one to judge?

[Docno]

OK, last post for a while, veering into the academic. I went to a research talk this week on what predicts successful expat adjustment in a foreign country (of course, focused on managers sent overseas). Turns out researchers have identified four factors that play a role in how well people adjust to a new cultural environment:

1. Their motivation and interest in interacting with people from the other culture
2. Their knowledge about the customs and practices (etc) in the other culture
3. Their ability to step back and understand their own reactions during cross-cultural exchanges
4. And their ability to adjust their own behaviour appropriately to the new environment

Interestingly, it seems that #1 plays the strongest role in adjustment. I'll say no more (for a while)....

[andrew]

A professor friend of mine from the US did some groundbreaking research in the 80s on job satisfaction. Previously, people had believe that employees are unhappy because there's something wrong with the job/company. But by studying people over many years across many job changes, he was able to show that people who are unhappy in one job will tend to be unhappy in other. I'm just wondering why so many of them seem to end up on Thaivisa and perhaps in Thailand itself.

By studying people over many years across many job changes, he was able to show that people who are unhappy in one job will tend to be unhappy in ANother.

I'm just wondering why so many of them seem to end up on Thaivisa and perhaps in Thailand itself.

----------------------------

Men with an unattractive outlook on life are invariably unattractive to women. These men come to Thailand because they have failed to find women in their own countries. For them, Thailand is a last resort.

Initially they're happy, but it soon wears off. Eventually they become every bit as bitter, cynical and resentful as they were "back home".

And after that ......... they join ThaiVisa.

Edited July 19, 2013 by andrew

[Docno]

A professor friend of mine from the US did some groundbreaking research in the 80s on job satisfaction. Previously, people had believe that employees are unhappy because there's something wrong with the job/company. But by studying people over many years across many job changes, he was able to show that people who are unhappy in one job will tend to be unhappy in other. I'm just wondering why so many of them seem to end up on Thaivisa and perhaps in Thailand itself.

By studying people over many years across many job changes, he was able to show that people who are unhappy in one job will tend to be unhappy in ANother.

I'm just wondering why so many of them seem to end up on Thaivisa and perhaps in Thailand itself.

----------------------------

Men with an unattractive outlook on life are invariably unattractive to women. These men come to Thailand because they have failed to find women in their own countries. For them, Thailand is a last resort.

Initially they're happy, but it soon wears off. Eventually they become every bit as bitter, cynical and resentful as they were "back home".

And after that ......... they join ThaiVisa.

Thanks for correcting the typo... have become too reliant on grammar checkers I guess :-)

[andrew]

A professor friend of mine from the US did some groundbreaking research in the 80s on job satisfaction. Previously, people had believe that employees are unhappy because there's something wrong with the job/company. But by studying people over many years across many job changes, he was able to show that people who are unhappy in one job will tend to be unhappy in other. I'm just wondering why so many of them seem to end up on Thaivisa and perhaps in Thailand itself.

By studying people over many years across many job changes, he was able to show that people who are unhappy in one job will tend to be unhappy in ANother.

I'm just wondering why so many of them seem to end up on Thaivisa and perhaps in Thailand itself.

----------------------------

Men with an unattractive outlook on life are invariably unattractive to women. These men come to Thailand because they have failed to find women in their own countries. For them, Thailand is a last resort.

Initially they're happy, but it soon wears off. Eventually they become every bit as bitter, cynical and resentful as they were "back home".

And after that ......... they join ThaiVisa.

Thanks for correcting the typo... have become too reliant on grammar checkers I guess :-)

You're welcome.

Do you have a link to your professor's research? I'd like to read his findings.

[Docno]

Perhaps, as others have suggested, our own attitudes and behaviour determine the experiences we have. John Lennon called it Instant Karma ...

John Lennon was very wise.

Some people radiate kindness and good heartedness, other people radiate bitterness and twistedness.

Some people have the basic civility and manners to go through life being polite and well thought of, others don't know what it means to be well mannered.

I watched a recent example of a rude aggressive farang reducing a Thai waitress to tears as she couldn't understand what he was saying. I was sitting four feet away and I couldn't understand him either.

The problem was entirely his, the end result was a young lady in tears and him muttering about stupid useless Thais.

It took her a while to compose herself, by this point the guys companions had launched into a verbal against him for being so rude. Good on them.

I lay you odds it hasn't made a blind bit of difference though, he'll still be as bitter today, and he'll still be blaming her.

Saw a similar thing happen in Singapore a couple of months back. A 60-something guy (later explained he was a Geordie) had ordered French onion soup and then when the Indian cook/waiter came by, rudely berated him for all the 'bread and cheese <deleted>' on top of the soup. Both the cook and I had a hard time understanding the customer because of his accent, but he did not disguise his anger and contempt. I explained to the customer that French onion sop is indeed made that way and the cook agreed to remove the offending bread and cheese and went away to do so. The Geordie turned out to have stayed in Asia for a long time (shipping industry) and was very friendly to me ... but not a word of apology to the Indian cook (who had done nothing wrong). I can only imagine how this sort of experience can affect people's reactions to (and stereotypes of) farangs...