When/how Exactly Is Someone Gay Or Hetero ?

[Sandy]

geeesh Matt. How much would i get for it? hehehe JK

[mrmnp]

Zendesigner: I have been much impressed with your posts in other threads so will venture to ask your interpretation of the following, clearly an emotionally charged issue:

Everybody's own bread and butter i suppose ? I'm strictly hetero, played around in my time and did some wild stuff like a threesome and so on but if a man tries to touch me i'll probably punch him right back. It's just an instinct.

I have nothing against gay's by the way, but it's just a normal reaction.

Most Gays I know that hear a remark like this one will chalk it off to a "straight" that has deepseated unresolved "gay issues", perhaps fear, causing him to strike out when being approached by a gay man.

Perhaps it is a alpha male territorial thing where all males are seen as a threat to "territory" and the females being guarded as seen in most of the animal kingdom. I can accept "defense of territory" as a "natural" reacton, if in fact that is what you feel?

Most civilized straight men in todays society when approached by a gay, know perfectly well that there is nothing "special" about him that attracts gays unless he is unusually attractive to all people.

Such civilized men often react with a thank you, but no thank you response or as Jack Nicholson said in "As Good as It Gets" , when an implicit gay invitations was encountered said "If that did it for me baby", I would be the luckiest guy in the world" The other actor was straight also, his name is Kinnear and he was playing a badly treated gay in this Academy Awarded film.

What mystifies me is your admitted sexual experimentation with other men and yet your resort to violence in response to an invitation from another male. Perhaps it is the touching from the other male to which you object, ie. your territory being invaded. Some of the most straight men in the world of sports touch each other on a daily basis, whether it is ass slapping, lip kissing or back slapping. Sure it is cultural, male lip kissing in Russia and much of Europe is practiced without sexual connotation.

Is there somehting about our Christian-Judean homophobic heritage that causes otherwise intelligent males to react violently to a sexual approach from the same sex. Why can't a simple "No thankyou" do?, women say it all the time.

Perhaps it is a learned response, from childhood, when we learned how to be a "man" and that is the only way "true men" are supposed to act when approached by gays?

Your thoughtful response would be appreciated as any "violence trigering" behaviour in today's world needs our attention. Thank you.

[Guest IT Manager]

IT...what are u having a hard time seeing? geeeesh get your mind out of the gutter hehehehe

I have a hard time seeing Zen being hit on by a gay man.

[Amazingthaigirl]

As Zen has an ongoing dispute with DR Pat Pong i will reply in his name.

Most Gays I know that hear a remark like this one will chalk it off to a "straight" that has deepseated unresolved "gay issues", perhaps fear, causing him to strike out when being approached by a gay man.

Yeah , yeah let me enlighten my post a bit. i don't have any problems with gay men as such. As long as they act like normal men. What i really can't stand is the katoey type gay pussy that acts like a girl on three times the portion of oestrogen.

They are usually the type to try to come pull you over as such. they send shivers down my spine of disgust. It's actually the same shiver when i see two gay men kissing or when you would see somebody take a cockroach of the wall and eat it.

I can't help it and it's from somewhere deep inside. I'm sure many hetero men have it and even woman when they see a lesbian couple. You can build theories around it if you want. This doesn't mean i could not appreciate their work, personality as such, i just want them to keep a distance. unfortunatly the girlie katoey type gay is completely self involved, i find them very shallow and mostly utterly stupid.

I have no problem with gay's as such, ###### i even had a gay doctor sometime ago (now he left his office to a female doctor, so now a got a female doctor ). I worked for a gay couple running a restaurant for three years. I didn't bother me at all , except when they came to give each other a mouth to mouth in my kitchen at newyears. Same shiver again.. BRR.

What mystifies me is your admitted sexual experimentation with other men

I said i experimented and has a threesome, wich doesn't mean i had sex with another man?? first you can have two kind of threesomes. 2 women 1 man or 2 men 1 woman. even if it is the latter one it does not neccesarely mean the men xxx each other.

Your thoughtful response would be appreciated as any "violence trigering" behaviour in today's world needs our attention. Thank you.

I would say that most gay's clearly pick up on the NO signal beforehand and don't push it. I only find the katoey tipe figures so selfinvolved they don't pickup on it.

When boundaries are pusched to far everybody will react in an instinctive way. The theorie or the brain doesn't have anything to do with that at that time.

I'm by no means violent i would say. The last fight i had was about 25 years ago when i was 11. I'm mostly capable of dealing with threathening situations with my posture alone, combined with a sharp conversational with i can hit your soft spot in half a second. I know it after 5 minutes also with most people.

I have a hard time seeing Zen being hit on by a gay man.

as IT has seen me in person i can only agree with him :-). It is indeed a strong leap of mind.

[Bluecat]

Yeah , yeah let me enlighten my post a bit. i don't have any problems with gay men as such. As long as they act like normal men.

If I define normal men in a "nature" way, they are the heterosexual ones, in the sense that the survival of the species is key, hence procreation,...

So, are you sure you do not have a problem?

[JemJem]

or when you would see somebody take a cockroach of the wall and eat it.

Oh, PLEASE !!!!! Not 'cockroaches' !!! Even the talk of it digusts me.

No more please !

Regards,

Jem

[Jeepz]

Gee Whizzer! Cockroaches are verbotten but grasshoppers are hor douvres? Pass the chocolate sauce. I love snails by the way! Slimy little buggers slide right down when served in garlic butter.

Two fuzzy faced guys in a lip lock makes me uncomfy. Not hot or intrigued or inquisitive. More on the order of finding out what the cook actually did with my order after I sent it back the second time.

Not bothered at all the same when two attractive women get into a tongue wrestling match. But if one of them is really dyke'ish while the other is attractively feminine, a sad little shiver of dismay does flash through this old guys nervous system. If they are both on the defeminized side of the lesbian spectrum, I feel a bit like I did when those two guys started flossing each other.

However, having said that, I know people that fit each and every stereotype that I've mentioned and they are friends or at least good acquaintances of mine that I enjoy talking to and spending some time with each week. But as individuals, not in a sexual context.

I think we can potentially be socialized to do about most anything. Ancient Sparta, the guys lived together and had intimate contact. The women took care of the homes, had lots of say in how things ran there, and were encouraged to take care of their needs with each other when the men weren't around.

So a lot of it has to do with society, and some of it has to do with inate preferences. How surprising. Or maybe not.

Jeepz

[Sandy]

OK im confused How did this topic to go cockroaches? Oh gees, do i have to read the whole thing for this. LOL

[farangguy]

AmazingThaigirl said, "What i really can't stand is the katoey type gay pussy that acts like a girl on three times the portion of oestrogen.

They are usually the type to try to come pull you over as such. they send shivers down my spine of disgust."

I like ladyboys.

Rogue ladyboys such as most who work on Beach Road are for the most part bad apples (mangos). They are very aggresive and looing to pickpocket. This problem of being agressive with intent to rob does not seem to occur with Thai bargirls or barboys. I don't have an explanation.

Then there are the semi-aggresive types that work the area of Jenny Star Bar.

Some of the Jenny babes are real sweethearts but many get crazed due to the combination of hormones and yabba and like to act out. I understand that some may not appreciate their unwanted advances.

There are many kind and sweet ladyboys out there. Just like some of us are straight and some of us are gay and some of us are bi, these ladyboys are simply being who they are. I suppose the combination of Thailand being a tolerant country and the an Asian type body lending itself to being more passable tahn a white or black body accounts for the amazing numbers of them.

For you guys who are sexually adventerous, give them a try. You might like it!

[Deadcert]

Yeah , yeah let me enlighten my post a bit. i don't have any problems with gay men as such. As long as they act like normal men.

It certainly sounds like you have a problem.Chill out, live and let live.

The whole Lady boy thing has zero interest for me, but it exsists and others enjoy it.

As for people kisiing in public in an intimate way, it doesn't matter whether they are gay or striaght, do us a favour save it for home.

Violent responses to homosexuality are not "natural" but learnt through conditioning, hence the more chilled out Thai attitude.

Human sexuality is a varied thing, find your particular bent, but don't stand in judgement of others becuase they don't conform to yours.