The Starting Point for Respecting Thais and Thai Culture

[SOTIRIOS]

...the problem is there is no tolerance or acceptance of others to begin with....

...we are welcome as long as cash is flowing and they are on the receiving end....

...so where and when will the respect ever begin....

[thailiketoo]

On the surface, I'm always respectful. But in my heart of hearts there are some issues.

Before I can fully respect their culture, first they must learn to respect my humanity.

It goes beyond the scams, as well as the sensational headlines of criminals getting proverbial slaps on the wrists for egregious, and sometimes violent crimes against westerners.

The crux of it is, too many western men marry, build a house, have children and are no closer to permanent residency than a first-time tourist. That's disgraceful. If you're allowing us to marry, there should be some reasonably accessed path to a permanent stay. I'm not asking for the right to vote, but simple assurance that if I have children here, no one can force me from them on a visa technicality.

1. Who is they? 60 million Thais?

2. What is your humanity? Don't give me some weak thing about a word in a language you don't understand. Do they take you to a hospital or a Veterinarian when you are sick?

3. What things do you not respect in their culture now that would change?

[thailiketoo]

...the problem is there is no tolerance or acceptance of others to begin with....

...we are welcome as long as cash is flowing and they are on the receiving end....

...so where and when will the respect ever begin....

When you leave France!

[thailiketoo]

When they start respecting the Rohingya and poor minorities, I will start to respect them.

You do know there are hill tribes that kill twin children and marry at 12 years of age don't you? How do you feel about them?

[thailiketoo]

The starting point for me for respecting any countries people and culture is based on travel to 40 countries in the past 20 years. I really have found on average about 15% (usually 10-20) of a given countries people are as#%^+s (but I will use the word jerks) I want to be clear that this is based on people while visiting their own country. For example I don't mean Russians in Thailand but in Russia. My country population figures are approximate for you anal number crunchers. So with my 15% figure there are about 195 million Chinese jerks, 150 million Indian jerks, 46 million American jerks ( can't wait to hear your obnoxious thoughts on that) , 10 million Thai jerks( same goes for this) 8 million English jerks, 3 million Australian jerks, 1.5 million Swedish jerks, 1.4 million in UAE and about 79,000 jerks in Luxembourg etc. I am very very sorry for not including every country in my jerk stats there are just too many!!!! Also remember I have only been to forty so far!!

One other thing I would like to mention is that I would return to any of the the countries that I have visited again, all were amazing! I find I like the world more as I travel and it opens my mind. I make a point to eat, drink and be merry with locals everywhere. Yes even in the Middle East.. Just a little harder to find booze.

Never been to France eh?

[FiftyTwo]

Sorry, I don't have much respect.

The politicians, police and officials are crooks.

And everyone else wants in on the game.

Not to mention Thai culture ..... a culture of greed.

Not suggesting you go home but would be interesting to hear why you stay here. Other than being assigned by your company to come here and assuming (I could be wrong) you are not a sexpat or a drug addict why are you here. If you own a business here why did you set it up in a country you think so little of . If you have a Thai wife and family why do you not take them back to what you consider to be a correct way of life? for that matter why did you marry them and condemn yourself to live here.

I might sound like I am personally attacking you but I am really curious as to why people with your attitude choose to stay here. As I said some have no choice other than quieting the company that they were working for. Them I understand.

I quite like it here, respect is no longer important in the modern world, along with other outdated rubbish like love, honour, duty and trust.

Not to mention I like living with my much younger wife and our children.

Oh, and I think even less of my home country where they give free money to women so they no longer need to have sex with men.

[Dimpys Dad]

Why is this a never ending subject for debate?

The moment you set foot in any country you start to abide by the laws of that country

The choice to blend in and embrace the idiosyncrasies of the culture are up to the individual.

Frankly if anyone feels they are unable to tolerate the people, the culture, the politics and the fact that we as non indigenous folks will encounter racism at times, then leave!

Absolutely no one who visits or resides in Thailand is forced to do so.

I wonder about that question too.

It isn't only the laws we should abide by but the cultural norms as well, if this is where we have chosen to live (immigrate). I didn't say one has to like everything, but it is really really tiring to read the continual bellyaching and bashing that bothers me the most. I knew and understood what this country was about when I made the decision to live here. Perhaps the complainers were desperately unhappy where they came from and thought they would find happiness here where things are really simpler than in the West...but wait, it is a complicated culture based on generations of life and not easy to understand. So, we try to understand it by what...by demeaning the people and their culture? Lots of possibilities of why folks complain but maybe some have a need to feel superior to the people of this nation so what better way for the intellectually lazy than to portray Thais as (enter demeaning term here).

I hope that Thais can overcome the destructive aspects in their country while holding on to those traits that make it so attractive. The motto "Land of Smiles" is a marketing term but it has a basis in fact. The ordinary Thais don't walk around smiling all the time but it makes my day whenever I see a Thai smile. When they smile it seems to come genuinely from within. They have to work, make a living, overcome hardships, endure the burdens common to man and it is hard. But I personally believe that when they (and I am talking about honest ordinary people not drunks and ne'er-do-wells) get away from the drudgery of making a living and go to their homes and have personal encounters with foreigner or friend they seem to be happy people.

We see what we want to see. Please don't let the dregs of any society influence your perception of that society. If you open your eyes to the good you will find it because it is there, really. Live by example. They will notice and it will have an effect, just maybe not by tomorrow, if we don't get impatient and want it now.

[aTomsLife]

On the surface, I'm always respectful. But in my heart of hearts there are some issues.

Before I can fully respect their culture, first they must learn to respect my humanity.

It goes beyond the scams, as well as the sensational headlines of criminals getting proverbial slaps on the wrists for egregious, and sometimes violent crimes against westerners.

The crux of it is, too many western men marry, build a house, have children and are no closer to permanent residency than a first-time tourist. That's disgraceful. If you're allowing us to marry, there should be some reasonably accessed path to a permanent stay. I'm not asking for the right to vote, but simple assurance that if I have children here, no one can force me from them on a visa technicality.

1. Who is they? 60 million Thais?

2. What is your humanity? Don't give me some weak thing about a word in a language you don't understand. Do they take you to a hospital or a Veterinarian when you are sick?

3. What things do you not respect in their culture now that would change?

1) They, as in this society.

Numbers 2 and 3 I already answered: Humanity is being able to stay in our children's lives without excessive government oversight. That is what I don't respect, and that's what I would change.

Husbands and fathers shouldn't have to check-in like criminals on probation. If the authorities are that worried about it, they should make it harder to get a marriage visa initially. Once it's issued, the government should stay out of a man's family life (barring, of course, criminal activity). I can't fully respect a society -- which is a direct reflection of a people's cultural values -- that justifies this behavior to a person simply because he is of different national origin.

[sz1a]

There is nothing that bothers me about Thailand anymore. I also don't complain about my home country any longer. I just realized that Thailand is a place I feel more at home in. You don't choose where you are born but you can choose where you die. I don't want to change Thailand in any way, nor do I want to change any other country. Just let people be.

[OxfordWill]

ethnocentrism and the associated integral ignorance about, well, anything important, is entirely commonplace among those living and visiting Thailand.

[thailiketoo]

On the surface, I'm always respectful. But in my heart of hearts there are some issues.

Before I can fully respect their culture, first they must learn to respect my humanity.

It goes beyond the scams, as well as the sensational headlines of criminals getting proverbial slaps on the wrists for egregious, and sometimes violent crimes against westerners.

The crux of it is, too many western men marry, build a house, have children and are no closer to permanent residency than a first-time tourist. That's disgraceful. If you're allowing us to marry, there should be some reasonably accessed path to a permanent stay. I'm not asking for the right to vote, but simple assurance that if I have children here, no one can force me from them on a visa technicality.

1. Who is they? 60 million Thais?

2. What is your humanity? Don't give me some weak thing about a word in a language you don't understand. Do they take you to a hospital or a Veterinarian when you are sick?

3. What things do you not respect in their culture now that would change?

1) They, as in this society.

Numbers 2 and 3 I already answered: Humanity is being able to stay in our children's lives without excessive government oversight. That is what I don't respect, and that's what I would change.

Husbands and fathers shouldn't have to check-in like criminals on probation. If the authorities are that worried about it, they should make it harder to get a marriage visa initially. Once it's issued, the government should stay out of a man's family life (barring, of course, criminal activity). I can't fully respect a society -- which is a direct reflection of a people's cultural values -- that justifies this behavior to a person simply because he is of different national origin.

What do you not respect now that you would respect it they gave you permanent residence? Your answer, "That they don't give me permanent residence." Do I have that right? Or are there some cultural values that you do not respect that you would respect if they gave you permanent residence?

[Benmart]

My perspective is quite simple.

I live life on life's terms, regardless of what country I am in.

I accept people for being themselves and take my personal inventory and not theirs.

I am not the center of the universe and the world does not revolve around me.

I offer love not hate

I offer peace not violence

I cherish each life as if it were my own

I know there is a supreme power and it's not me

I recite the Serenity Prayer often

So far, Thailand is for me and I love my life here

Pax Nobiscum

Edited December 26, 2013 by Benmart

[Naam]

GuestHouse

The Starting Point for Respecting Thais and Thai Culture, is surely respecting yourself and your own culture - an anchor point from which you can appreciate others and their culture.

for me the starting point to answer your question would be to define "respect" and "culture". different people have different views / opinions as far as respect and culture is concerned. the latter notwithstanding the definitions which might exist in Wikipedia or the Encyclopaedia Britannica.

[aTomsLife]

On the surface, I'm always respectful. But in my heart of hearts there are some issues.

Before I can fully respect their culture, first they must learn to respect my humanity.

It goes beyond the scams, as well as the sensational headlines of criminals getting proverbial slaps on the wrists for egregious, and sometimes violent crimes against westerners.

The crux of it is, too many western men marry, build a house, have children and are no closer to permanent residency than a first-time tourist. That's disgraceful. If you're allowing us to marry, there should be some reasonably accessed path to a permanent stay. I'm not asking for the right to vote, but simple assurance that if I have children here, no one can force me from them on a visa technicality.

1. Who is they? 60 million Thais?

2. What is your humanity? Don't give me some weak thing about a word in a language you don't understand. Do they take you to a hospital or a Veterinarian when you are sick?

3. What things do you not respect in their culture now that would change?

1) They, as in this society.

Numbers 2 and 3 I already answered: Humanity is being able to stay in our children's lives without excessive government oversight. That is what I don't respect, and that's what I would change.

Husbands and fathers shouldn't have to check-in like criminals on probation. If the authorities are that worried about it, they should make it harder to get a marriage visa initially. Once it's issued, the government should stay out of a man's family life (barring, of course, criminal activity). I can't fully respect a society -- which is a direct reflection of a people's cultural values -- that justifies this behavior to a person simply because he is of different national origin.

What do you not respect now that you would respect it they gave you permanent residence? Your answer, "That they don't give me permanent residence." Do I have that right? Or are there some cultural values that you do not respect that you would respect if they gave you permanent residence?

I know we're supposed to respect our fellow forum members, so quit making it so hard to respect you.

You did not initially ask me: "What do you not respect now that you would respect it they gave you permanent residence?"

Nor was my answer: "They don't give me permanent residence."

Way to oversimplify my point.

I'm not going to repeat myself, as my writing is crystal clear. If you can't understand it, I couldn't care less. Goodbye.

[NoshowJones]

Sorry, I don't have much respect.

The politicians, police and officials are crooks.

And everyone else wants in on the game.

Not to mention Thai culture ..... a culture of greed.

Why pick on Thailand here, everything you have said, apart from maybe the police being crooks also applies to the UK. You don't get the top politicians stealing money from pensioners in Thailand, sorry, I will rephrase that. You don't get the top politicians in Thailand blatantly stealing from their old people the way they do in the UK. I thing the UK TV members will know what I am talking about here.

[NoshowJones]

Then you are living in a la la land. You probably think parents hate their own children when you see the kids get punished.

When I see parents hitting their children here in Thailand (which I sometimes see), then I think that the parents are stupid, under-educated and should never had had children... They for sure do not get my respect.

I have never seen a Thai parent hitting their children. But I do have to say too many Thai parents are stupid, ie the ones who give their underage children the keys to their motorbike, the ones who rise up to let their children have their seats on the buses and skytrain.

[NoshowJones]

There is nothing that bothers me about Thailand anymore. I also don't complain about my home country any longer. I just realized that Thailand is a place I feel more at home in. You don't choose where you are born but you can choose where you die. I don't want to change Thailand in any way, nor do I want to change any other country. Just let people be

Good post, but how would you like it if you were walking round a market, and some idiot who is too lazy to leave the motorbike outside and walk, runs into the back of you even at low speed. There are somethings which are not acceptable in any country if they are putting your well being at risk, and sad to say Thailand is near the top of the list where things like that are concerned. I stick up for Thais a lot on this forum, no country is perfect, and the positives do far outweigh the negatives in this country.

[thailiketoo]

Then you are living in a la la land. You probably think parents hate their own children when you see the kids get punished.

When I see parents hitting their children here in Thailand (which I sometimes see), then I think that the parents are stupid, under-educated and should never had had children... They for sure do not get my respect.

I have never seen a Thai parent hitting their children. But I do have to say too many Thai parents are stupid, ie the ones who give their underage children the keys to their motorbike, the ones who rise up to let their children have their seats on the buses and skytrain.

How many States in the USA require seat belts on school buses? Can a 13 year old child ride in the back of a pick up in North Carolina?

Edited December 26, 2013 by thailiketoo

[Ulic]

I respect the culture, however that does not mean I respect everyone. The politicians and police are at the top of the

don't give a rats ass about. Although the police can be surprising. Phuket tuk tuk/ taxi drivers are also at the top

of the list.

[rayongchelsea]

I think the key to all this is to respect yourself first..the rest naturally follows..

[StreetCowboy]

Can we have a definition of respect for the purposes of this thread please?

And also culture?

Without agreed definitions, I doubt we are ever going to get anything useful out of this thread....

SC

[benalibina]

Can we have a definition of respect for the purposes of this thread please?

And also culture?

Without agreed definitions, I doubt we are ever going to get anything useful out of this thread....

SC

Start a new THREAD, i suggest !

[farang000999]

Thai people can be very different from each other just like any other ethnicity each Thai might have their own opinions and beliefs.

The truth is that all Thai culture really is:

-food

-holidays

-belief in ghosts/spirits

-face

Even these aspects which are very common will still vary in degrees.

Everything else varies so greatly that one has to wonder what the point is even trying to put it into borders as "Thai culture". What we can notice is that some Thai people share some similarities but there will always be large exceptions.

For example, my wife has never wai to me before in our entire relationship to my recollection and I am sure if I told this to the Thai Visa cultural experts they would have a huge long list of comments based on "Thai culture" but all they would be doing is entertaining themselves as they hilariously inform my wife who is actually Thai of what she should be doing.

Edited December 26, 2013 by farang000999

[farang000999]

Also, one can live here without speaking much Thai and still be respectful, enjoy themselves and be respected by Thai people. You don't have to speak Thai fluently to respect Thai people and their culture. What is the benefit in understanding Thai culture? As long as I understand my wife and my children and those providing me services understand what I demand for my money - what does it really matter? I know how to attack a plate of sum tum bpoo pla ra as well as any Thai so we will always have that in common.

[socksy01]

I try to treat people at FACE value

[thailiketoo]

Thai people can be very different from each other just like any other ethnicity each Thai might have their own opinions and beliefs.

The truth is that all Thai culture really is:

-food

-holidays

-belief in ghosts/spirits

-face

Even these aspects which are very common will still vary in degrees.

Everything else varies so greatly that one has to wonder what the point is even trying to put it into borders as "Thai culture". What we can notice is that some Thai people share some similarities but there will always be large exceptions.

For example, my wife has never wai to me before in our entire relationship to my recollection and I am sure if I told this to the Thai Visa cultural experts they would have a huge long list of comments based on "Thai culture" but all they would be doing is entertaining themselves as they hilariously inform my wife who is actually Thai of what she should be doing.

You left out a bunch of stuff. 1. Sex. Taboo and not taboo stuff. 2. Buddhism. 3. Family and marital responsibilities. 4. Parts of the body that are clean and dirty. 5. Age and respect for and age for certain acts cultural and legal definitions may be different. 6. Treatment of animals and old people. 7. Cultural distance and eye contact. And I'm just scratching the surface. Frankly, 000999 you don't seem to have a clue. You might try google

• norms
• folkways
• mores
• taboos
• laws

[Straight8]

Be respectful to all.

They will reciprocate.

Thai folk are no different to any other.

Hogwash!!!

Does any foreigner here seriously think he has received the same amount of respect back that he/she has given in this country, seriously?

If your answer is yes you are either BSing or you are miraculously one in a million.

* Walking into a building, you hold the door open, they walk right through without acknowledgement.

* You take a Thai girl [as the majority as males here] out to dinner, how common is it for them to say "Thanks for dinner", happened to me a few times,but I have never just let it go.. they know about it.....

* Wish your friendly bank officer a good day after finishing your transaction. How many times have they wished you one back??

* For all you married people that respect their culture by marrying here and doing it all their way. What do they do to give respect back to your culture ??

List goes on.....

I do enough not to disrespect their culture in general especially when living in their country, that's where it stops.

Edited December 27, 2013 by Straight8

[thailiketoo]

Be respectful to all.

They will reciprocate.

Thai folk are no different to any other.

Hogwash!!!

Does any foreigner here seriously think he has received the same amount of respect back that he/she has given in this country, seriously?

If your answer is yes you are either BSing or you are miraculously one in a million.

* Walking into a building, you hold the door open, they walk right through without acknowledgement.

* You take a Thai girl [as the majority as males here] out to dinner, do they say "Thanks for dinner", happened to me a few times,but I have never just let it go.. they know about it.

* Wish your friendly bank officer a good day after finishing your transaction. How many times have they wished you one back

* For all you married people that respect their culture by marrying here and doing it all their way. What do they do respect your culture in return ??

List goes on.....

I do enough not to disrespect their culture especially when living in their country, that's where it stops.

See your hogwash and up you one calendar.

Bank manager in the bank. Khun ****** hello. How is your daughter? You look good today (he took a vacation and looked rested). He ran in the back and got me a calendar.

Edited December 27, 2013 by thailiketoo

[farang000999]

Thai people can be very different from each other just like any other ethnicity each Thai might have their own opinions and beliefs.

The truth is that all Thai culture really is:

-food

-holidays

-belief in ghosts/spirits

-face

Even these aspects which are very common will still vary in degrees.

Everything else varies so greatly that one has to wonder what the point is even trying to put it into borders as "Thai culture". What we can notice is that some Thai people share some similarities but there will always be large exceptions.

For example, my wife has never wai to me before in our entire relationship to my recollection and I am sure if I told this to the Thai Visa cultural experts they would have a huge long list of comments based on "Thai culture" but all they would be doing is entertaining themselves as they hilariously inform my wife who is actually Thai of what she should be doing.

You left out a bunch of stuff. 1. Sex. Taboo and not taboo stuff. 2. Buddhism. 3. Family and marital responsibilities. 4. Parts of the body that are clean and dirty. 5. Age and respect for and age for certain acts cultural and legal definitions may be different. 6. Treatment of animals and old people. 7. Cultural distance and eye contact. And I'm just scratching the surface. Frankly, 000999 you don't seem to have a clue. You might try google

• norms
• folkways
• mores
• taboos
• laws

You forgot:

hair style

favorite color

favorite music star

favorite movie

personality

life outlook

favorite sport

favorite football team

favorite city in thailand

favorite soda

favorite room temperature

favorite automobile brand

...

Edited December 27, 2013 by farang000999

[DocN]

I generally respect everybody- until they prove to be @$$holes.

But "respect" a culture? Moreover one, that shows little respect for any other "culture"...thanks...but, no thanks!