Getting out of the bargirl / Isaan dating scene - feels great!

[sirchai]

Good for the OP.

A lot of farangs go through a sort of "xxxxx fascination" phase when they first get here. This and what the OP euphemistically describes as "Isaan dating" are roads to nowhere.

Normal farangs grow out of it after a month or two.

Please explain the definition of "normal" for you. Seems that you don't know much about life here, do you?-

[sirchai]

if your young its proberly good for you to get out but if your old like me then this bar girl dating scene is the only option one has

Bar girls overall, have a higher libido!

However most girls share the same traits of Thainess.

Indolent, childish, arrogant, backward educationally, unfair and illogical by nurture.

A higher libido....seems you're watching way too many Thainee movies.

[Tmymaimee]

I read your comments,i am not impressed !

These girls who work the bars , streets ect are mostly in survival mode so I would strongly advise you not to look down your nose at at them...

There is probably a minority that are in it for the money alone but most will be supporting elderly parents,children or other family members...

What did your school teacher friend do to support herself whilst going through university ???

Survival mode? Are you shitting me? My ex was making 5000 baht a night, did nothing to support her family and many of her friends are the same. So if a girl is making 100,000 baht a month, what kind of mode is an average Thai in? From what I've seen, you can describe almost the whole country in "survival" mode. Limited savings, zero investments, maxed out credit. Nothing to do with bargirls.

I never looked down my nose at them. I just said that the mentality they have is one of extraction, regardless of whether they have a great personality, are caring or anything else. I've met bargirls that would do anything possible to help another person, but at the end of the day its about the money every time. Why so many houses in Issan built by sponsors? I don't see the same in other areas of Thailand. The deal was she would marry him, sleep with him and he would take care of her family and build a local house. That is called extraction.

Will I screw it up? Only if I don't value my future as I find it very hard to meet a beautiful, educated, independent Thai girl. For some guys, they can't push them away fast enough. For me, its hard because of my size, baldness, age and I'm looking for the same type of girls that Thai men are looking for (light skin, educated, employed, and beautiful).

During school, her parents supported her. They work at regular jobs.

My point is that some people (myself included) get so buried in the bar life that we don't know how much we're missing out on until we get a chance out.

If some of you dislike my posts so much, do you not understand how the ignore feature works?

And why in the hell do some of you have absolutely nothing better to do in your life than read past posts and research another person? Do you live on here with your 10,000+ posts and not have an outside life? Sad, pathetic life in your village I guess.

[biplanebluey]

if your young its proberly good for you to get out but if your old like me then this bar girl dating scene is the only option one has

I have been in Isaan for 7 yrs and married for 3 yrs to a village girl.No family problems and as an ex rice grower family girl she realizes what a great life it is married to a Farang.She is a lot more thrifty than me and tells me not to spend too much on things.Even when trying to buy something for her. She asks for nothing more than the occasional trip to the village to see relations who all treat me as just another member of the family.None of them have ever asked me for money and I have a good day out every time I go.We have a great relationship.personally,so do not give me that b/shi* about being too old.I can still walk past bars and get the "hello handsome man" treatment,and my wife tells me there are girls in the village that would jump into her shoes if anything went wrong with us.------- and I am guessing I am an older man than you----78 this year. Walk away from the bars and open your eyes,and to the OP------- good luck to you .You are on the right track

[Kitsune]

I don't know…when we're in the club and she is wearing skin tight, mini shorts, 4" spike heels and has one leg raised on the table of drinks to make a 90 deg angle and grinding me…its not my vision of who I take home to visit my mother. In her spare time she worked at Soi 6. All my friends made the same comment.

Nor your mother needs to witness you having sex with newly appointed Miss Normal.

Even hookers have a life, family, kids, etc, she's just trying to make a living!

You missed out the bit about even hookers have husbands and boyfriends, not that the dumb two week millionaire needs to know that, all he has to be fed is the buffalo shyt about Thai man no good.

Check out Liberty apartments or On Nut to see how these girls live and who they live with.

The sad thing is, most of their earnings go to support the "maeng da", never mind the suckers who have never ventured futher than Soi Cowboy will keep on sending the money.

As for make a living, walked by an advert today, cleaners 15k per month, get a job in the Yam Yam factory, easily earn up to 20k per month.

Guess the lao kao bill for khun por and the gambling bill for khum mae is more.

Yes they are trying to make a living

Yes they are being abused by their BF/mafia/customers pick one

No there are not many jobs for maids at 15K

And yes they might need more than 15K to live in BKK especially of you have to support others

[Tmymaimee]

Of course there are exceptions to the above as there always will be but by and large, I just became disillusioned by the whole one way path of money. It was never like this back home so why here? Why am I seen as a provider? What do they in fact contribute?

Well let's see; this is what you had to say about it last year http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/topic/680634-why-go-to-so-much-trouble-marryingdating-someone-of-a-different-culture-nationality-mentality-etc/page-2#entry7021139

Why do I date / marry Thai girls despite the cultural gaps? I am 42, look a lot older than 42, short, bald and fairly unattractive. I also have a lot of money. Thailand is perfect for me because back home, money means nothing and will not get you the same level of girlfriend you can achieve in Thailand. I would love to date the truly gorgeous, hi-so models I see around Paragon but they look for guys with way more money than me, as well as guys who are attractive (which I am not).

Everyone wants to meet someone attractive, sexy and fun. Well, in the west at 42 being short, bald and old looking, forget about it. I had a woman in a pet store ask me for coffee last year...about 90 kgs, 50 years old and disgusting.

If I'm getting you right, you were delighted that your money got you into hottie underwear you could only dream of accessing back home.

How, then, can you now turn around and slate those girls for trying to take a bite out of the carrot you deliberately dangled in front of their noses?

Sure, be happy that you've got a normal girl but don't turn around and bitch up the girls who gave you everything you craved but couldn't taste before you landed at Swampy.

You're right on the money and I wholeheartedly agree with your post, but unfortunately, this is exactly the kind of reaction the OP was looking for: he is a known troll, just writing the crap he did for the inevitable criticisms that we rational folk will have of him.

By the way, he's also a scummy, nasty racist, a fact that has become clear in many of his previous trolls--er, I mean, posts. I recommend ignoring him: his kind tend to get bored and go away when you do!

You're damn right I'm a scummy racist. Proud of it too. The world would be a lot better off without a lot of the disadvantaged that consume resources instead of contributing. I'm in favour of forced sterilization for drug addicts, murderers and rapists, as well as child molesters. You don't have to agree with anything I say…just use the ignore. Please! And never reply to another of my posts again or else! You are not wanted? Do you understand that?

[swbloke]

I read your comments,i am not impressed !

These girls who work the bars , streets ect are mostly in survival mode so I would strongly advise you not to look down your nose at at them...

There is probably a minority that are in it for the money alone but most will be supporting elderly parents,children or other family members...

What did your school teacher friend do to support herself whilst going through university ???

Survival mode? Are you shitting me? My ex was making 5000 baht a night, did nothing to support her family and many of her friends are the same. So if a girl is making 100,000 baht a month, what kind of mode is an average Thai in? From what I've seen, you can describe almost the whole country in "survival" mode. Limited savings, zero investments, maxed out credit. Nothing to do with bargirls.

I never looked down my nose at them. I just said that the mentality they have is one of extraction, regardless of whether they have a great personality, are caring or anything else. I've met bargirls that would do anything possible to help another person, but at the end of the day its about the money every time. Why so many houses in Issan built by sponsors? I don't see the same in other areas of Thailand. The deal was she would marry him, sleep with him and he would take care of her family and build a local house. That is called extraction.

Will I screw it up? Only if I don't value my future as I find it very hard to meet a beautiful, educated, independent Thai girl. For some guys, they can't push them away fast enough. For me, its hard because of my size, baldness, age and I'm looking for the same type of girls that Thai men are looking for (light skin, educated, employed, and beautiful).

During school, her parents supported her. They work at regular jobs.

My point is that some people (myself included) get so buried in the bar life that we don't know how much we're missing out on until we get a chance out.

If some of you dislike my posts so much, do you not understand how the ignore feature works?

And why in the hell do some of you have absolutely nothing better to do in your life than read past posts and research another person? Do you live on here with your 10,000+ posts and not have an outside life? Sad, pathetic life in your village I guess.

You've come onto a public board and made statements about changes you have made to your life, good for you. You have also used language that many find offensive. You've been exposed as a hypocrite too. I hope you are happy with your girl, I also hope you change the way express yourself, words like leeches, expressions like good for nothing whore are, to many people, deeply offensive. I suggest you need to examine yourself and understand your serial failures with woman and not verbally abuse those you have used due to poverty of their circumstances.

[louse1953]

I have lived here for 23 years, I came here when I was 35, that's the difference, I was a young guy, and I got along ok..

I would think most guys on ThaiVisa are old men, too old to adapt, am I right ?

Hey, guess what, that's why you can't get along, you are too old, just go back to your own home, be safe.

Thailand is not an Old peoples Home.

ThaiVisa forum might be though.

I'll let you in on a secret,your old now so maybe you should go "home".I came here as a green,naive 21 year old and i'm a lot older now.People can adapt at any age,if they want to.A 75 year old mate of mine goes back to his home country and all his friends are in nursing homes,one foot in the grave.He still rides a pushy and a motorbike and drives a car and his mind is still quite active.He rekons Thailand keeps him young.

[Turok]

No woman is worth dating. Women are for sex period and as soon as men figure this out the world will be a much better place. Dating = sex. You want to sit and chat, go out with your buddies. The best date is one where there are no plates or cups in front of her. Give the money directly to her, knock one out in 30 minutes or less and move on. Too many guys in today's world want to be the WKOP. (White Knight of Poon) expensive dinners, flowers, sweet poems. etc..... Pathetic. Those days are over. Women are scandalous skanks and as soon as men rise up and change their attitudes about women this world will become a masculine world again. Men have become vaginized and too kind towards women. The world has become pussified.

It always comes down to money. ALWAYS!!!! Guys who marry think its free!!! Ha Ha Guys who say they date normal girls and that they are different than bar girls.... Come on. Seriously? You move a chic in with you or marry her you end up paying her rent, food, phone car, etc.... And if you divorce, Vaginamony. All girls are the same. Worldwide. This is just not Thai girls.

Financial planners should start telling their single male clients not to marry but use a service provider for sex. Getting married is not good for saving money for your future.

I disagree with the OP that finding a so called more normal Thai girl is better. Ill take the hot babes and not so hot babes who want some cash and fake that they enjoy being with me over a date with a school teacher who has another hidden agenda. Hit it, quit it and pay is the way to go. No dinners, no flowers, no movies, no trips. It isn't necessary.

I have never married and have no intention to. Many guys I know have done it and regret it. Stay single. Learn the rules of the game. For those of you who need an education, check out Tom Leykis or www.maskedwriter.com and see what is happening. Educate yourself against the enemy.

Turok, the Dinosaur Hunter

Edited February 16, 2014 by Turok

[FiftyTwo]

^^^ Funny ^^^

I like it.

[swbloke]

@whereustay

Wow

Calm down, Threatening people you don't know if a bad idea. I'd like to thing your most recent comments are due to stress and you don't actually mean these things. if you do then god help anyone who ever has the misfortune to be close to you.

[Sam Gold]

No woman is worth dating. Women are for sex period and as soon as men figure this out the world will be a much better place. Dating = sex. You want to sit and chat, go out with your buddies. The best date is one where there are no plates or cups in front of her. Give the money directly to her, knock one out in 30 minutes or less and move on. Too many guys in today's world want to be the WKOP. (White Knight of Poon) expensive dinners, flowers, sweet poems. etc..... Pathetic. Those days are over. Women are scandalous skanks and as soon as men rise up and change their attitudes about women this world will become a masculine world again. Men have become vaginized and too kind towards women. The world has become pussified.

It always comes down to money. ALWAYS!!!! Guys who marry think its free!!! Ha Ha Guys who say they date normal girls and that they are different than bar girls.... Come on. Seriously? You move a chic in with you or marry her you end up paying her rent, food, phone car, etc.... And if you divorce, Vaginamony. All girls are the same. Worldwide. This is just not Thai girls.

Financial planners should start telling their single male clients not to marry but use a service provider for sex. Getting married is not good for saving money for your future.

I disagree with the OP that finding a so called more normal Thai girl is better. Ill take the hot babes and not so hot babes who want some cash and fake that they enjoy being with me over a date with a school teacher who has another hidden agenda. Hit it, quit it and pay is the way to go. No dinners, no flowers, no movies, no trips. It isn't necessary.

Turok, the Dinosaur Hunter

Blimey. Whatever she did to you, I sympahize. She screwed you up bad.

[Acharn]

You missed out the bit about even hookers have husbands and boyfriends, not that the dumb two week millionaire needs to know that, all he has to be fed is the buffalo shyt about Thai man no good.

Check out Liberty apartments or On Nut to see how these girls live and who they live with.

The sad thing is, most of their earnings go to support the "maeng da", never mind the suckers who have never ventured futher than Soi Cowboy will keep on sending the money.

As for make a living, walked by an advert today, cleaners 15k per month, get a job in the Yam Yam factory, easily earn up to 20k per month.

Guess the lao kao bill for khun por and the gambling bill for khum mae is more.

Don't know why you think they all live in Liberty Apartments. I knew a bunch of them over the years. A few had "boy friends"/maeng daa's. Most didn't. Some used to take their hard earned money and spend it on "toy boys" in the bar upstairs from Country Road II. One used to go home to her husband and son in Surin every week, then come back to Bangkok to make money for the family. Others got tired of their husbands beating them up whenever they wanted 100 baht and ran away, usually taking their kid with them. I knew one whose mother forced her into the business when whe was 14. Most of the women I knew were pretty decent people, coping as best they could with a hard life. Some were thieves and cheats.

I'm happy for the OP that he decided on a way of life that he thinks is healthier. I think his views are naive and uninformed and not very interesting.

[djhotsox]

You're right on the money and I wholeheartedly agree with your post, but unfortunately, this is exactly the kind of reaction the OP was looking for: he is a known troll, just writing the crap he did for the inevitable criticisms that we rational folk will have of him.

By the way, he's also a scummy, nasty racist, a fact that has become clear in many of his previous trolls--er, I mean, posts. I recommend ignoring him: his kind tend to get bored and go away when you do!

You're dam_n right I'm a scummy racist. Proud of it too. The world would be a lot better off without a lot of the disadvantaged that consume resources instead of contributing. I'm in favour of forced sterilization for drug addicts, murderers and rapists, as well as child molesters. You don't have to agree with anything I say…just use the ignore. Please! And never reply to another of my posts again or else! You are not wanted? Do you understand that?

Forced sterilization....you forgot one....scummy racists.......

[Dap]

ThaiVisa members know nothing about bars and bargirls.

[louse1953]

If you are proud of being a scummy racist you have no place in this country.Now we know why you have problems,fat and bald to boot,probably halitosis as well.What a fine catch you must be,your woman must be desperate.

[ggt]

I have lived here for 23 years, I came here when I was 35, that's the difference, I was a young guy, and I got along ok..

I would think most guys on ThaiVisa are old men, too old to adapt, am I right ?

Hey, guess what, that's why you can't get along, you are too old, just go back to your own home, be safe.

Thailand is not an Old peoples Home.

ThaiVisa forum might be though.

Does this mean...that you will be returning to your own home...if you are lucky enough to reach old age?

Thailand gives older...divorced or widowed...men...a chance to be happy again...even if it is a fantasy...it beats living alone back where they are ignored completely...

In 5 years you will be buying Viagra...trying to keep up with your younger lady...in 10 years you will have given up and thinking about home again...

Bye!

[Kitsune]

You're dam_n right I'm a scummy racist. Proud of it too. The world would be a lot better off without a lot of the disadvantaged that consume resources instead of contributing. I'm in favour of forced sterilization for drug addicts, murderers and rapists, as well as child molesters. You don't have to agree with anything I say…just use the ignore. Please! And never reply to another of my posts again or else! You are not wanted? Do you understand that?

Hang on you're a racist that dates Thai girls?

Am I missing something ?

[Tmymaimee]

If you are proud of being a scummy racist you have no place in this country.Now we know why you have problems,fat and bald to boot,probably halitosis as well.What a fine catch you must be,your woman must be desperate.

Where did I say I was fat? What is wrong with being racist? Many minorities are some of the most racist people you will ever meet yet they are the first to complain.

I never implied I was a catch. Far from it. But the truth of the matter (and some girls realize this) are that the great "catches" have unlimited options in Thailand. They are called players. I only wish I could get the girls they throw away like garbage every day. Not very often, one of these girls wakes up and realizes that someone like me will appreciate what I normally can't obtain and take a chance.

Its probably the same reasoning why you'll sometimes see a normal looking farang with a short, dark, ugly girl. He knows the superstars can have any guy so the more homely types will likely be better in bed and take care of him better, as they appreciate what they can't normally have.

[marko kok prong]

You judge a person because she had to do this from nesecesity, like many do have,kid's thai husband/boyfriend <deleted> off,your post is over simplified,and show's you know very little about thailand or even people in general,i mean women,they all want security,if you cannot give that then i suggest your relationship with your teacher will be short lived,in short i think you are patting yourself on the back for something you think you have done .but have not.

[HardenedSoul]

I read your comments,i am not impressed !

These girls who work the bars , streets ect are mostly in survival mode so I would strongly advise you not to look down your nose at at them...

There is probably a minority that are in it for the money alone but most will be supporting elderly parents,children or other family members...

What did your school teacher friend do to support herself whilst going through university ???

Survival mode? Are you shitting me? My ex was making 5000 baht a night, did nothing to support her family and many of her friends are the same. So if a girl is making 100,000 baht a month, what kind of mode is an average Thai in? From what I've seen, you can describe almost the whole country in "survival" mode. Limited savings, zero investments, maxed out credit. Nothing to do with bargirls.

I never looked down my nose at them. I just said that the mentality they have is one of extraction, regardless of whether they have a great personality, are caring or anything else. I've met bargirls that would do anything possible to help another person, but at the end of the day its about the money every time. Why so many houses in Issan built by sponsors? I don't see the same in other areas of Thailand. The deal was she would marry him, sleep with him and he would take care of her family and build a local house. That is called extraction.

Will I screw it up? Only if I don't value my future as I find it very hard to meet a beautiful, educated, independent Thai girl. For some guys, they can't push them away fast enough. For me, its hard because of my size, baldness, age and I'm looking for the same type of girls that Thai men are looking for (light skin, educated, employed, and beautiful).

During school, her parents supported her. They work at regular jobs.

My point is that some people (myself included) get so buried in the bar life that we don't know how much we're missing out on until we get a chance out.

If some of you dislike my posts so much, do you not understand how the ignore feature works?

And why in the hell do some of you have absolutely nothing better to do in your life than read past posts and research another person? Do you live on here with your 10,000+ posts and not have an outside life? Sad, pathetic life in your village I guess.

Well no, that's not it at all

No one went looking for your past posts and no one researched you - it's just you've got a knack of starting troll-ish threads.

I say troll-ish because initially it's hard to take them seriously but once people realise that you really are that naive, tragic and clueless about your surroundings in general and women in particular, people tend to remember you.

Anyway, the post I quoted was actually frank, honest and even admirable but turning up now to criticise the girls who helped relieve your pent-up sexual frustrations for doing exactly what you expected of them just proves what a plank you really are.

You gave them the impression that hooking up with you was a way to make bank.

The exact same bank you complained couldn't get you within 100 metres of quality tail back home.

You're just embarrassed because you've been shown to be nothing more than a big, fat hypocrite

[dunque]

if your young its proberly good for you to get out but if your old like me then this bar girl dating scene is the only option one has

My mission is to find an old Thai lady that's done the job on a few foreigner and built up a next egg so we can live in relative comfort without constant ATM withdrawl.

So, essentially, you would like to be a pimp ?

[Rockhopper]

Go buy the book "Thailand Fever" and READ IT!! You're not in Kansas anymore, Toto. Thai society is NOT like home. Thai woman feel love when their man shows love by the things he buys for her. And that can include money. But it's more than that, and many farangs don't, or can't, get there head around that aspect of Thai society.

[marko kok prong]

wereu stay should stay in his own country i think and not come to los,he is not a very nice chap,methinks,i think possibly a cad,and a bounder,oh dear,will that get me in trouble with our venerated moderators?

[Skint]

Go buy the book "Thailand Fever" and READ IT!! You're not in Kansas anymore, Toto. Thai society is NOT like home. Thai woman feel love when their man shows love by the things he buys for her. And that can include money. But it's more than that, and many farangs don't, or can't, get there head around that aspect of Thai society.

Better with private chancer by leather

Sent from my iPad using Thaivisa Connect Thailand

[marko kok prong]

I think withwereustay's attitude to life he will never be happy any where, Bob Marley said ,you can run away ,but you can't run away from your self, if you are a miserable git unless something changes you or you change you,never gonna be happy,maybe only less miserable, i was like this for the first 18 month's i lived here,now i realise my wife is a lovely person,it is not all about the money,sure she's want's security,what woman does not,but i went for a three week holiday to koh chang on my own,and all she ever did was call to say she missed me,this sterotyping of girls who have worked the bar is stupid,they all have reasons ,and mostly,it is not about ammassing cash,it's hoping they meet a decent guy who will look after them,whereustay is way off the mark, and too boot i think he show's that he is also a snob.

[thailampang2012]

I don't know…when we're in the club and she is wearing skin tight, mini shorts, 4" spike heels and has one leg raised on the table of drinks to make a 90 deg angle and grinding me…its not my vision of who I take home to visit my mother. In her spare time she worked at Soi 6. All my friends made the same comment.

Nor your mother needs to witness you having sex with newly appointed Miss Normal.

Even hookers have a life, family, kids, etc, she's just trying to make a living!

Dancers, bar girls and "models" without sex involved, ....those are just trying to make better money, and may have boy friends, kids and husbands sometimes, but hookers???....no husbands or boy friends..just pimps...Their profession is to fake love and pleasure the best they can, and be well paid for fulfill the fantasies of men with some "problems" interacting with other kind of women. Freud explains....

If you are old...not easy to resolve...If you are young or insecure....you may grow up some day...Looks like this guy did.

[tingtongtingtong]

Is the primary school teacher happy to be dating an ex-curb crawler?

[Postmaster]

A great post. Enjoyed your story. Think I am reaching a similar stage in my Thailand experience.

[drand11]

Been in Thailand for 6 months. I can totally relate.Good post. I am now dating off of Thai Love Links and I enjoy meeting professional Thai ladies that intelligent and I can get to know.