Paying her family?

[netghost]

Hi all, let me first say not trolling here. I will start from the beginning. I met a girl online, did the whole chat for awhile bs and then moved to skype. We did the skype thing everyday for a few months, I fell in love. I have bought her a new phone, pay dentist 1000 baht per month and like 7000 upfront to fix her teeth, and 2200 baht a month payments on new honda click. I saved some money for a few months and quit my job and came to Thailand. I wanted to get an apartment downtown, but was told not to by her family, "many bad girls in thailand, you stay with family". They insisted I live there. I hold a BA degree and am a native English speaker,, so I was going to go the teaching route. I arrived in Thailand mid March. Had schools offer jobs starting mid May. Her family said no problem, wait until school starts and go teach. After one month her father demanded I marry her or leave the house. They ask for 100,000 baht, a ring that was around 34,000 baht, not that big of a deal. The other part of it was to buy land and build a house, and get us a car, and start up a business for the family. Oh and continue to take care of the family forever. When I explained I needed to wait for my job to start here, rage followed! I was kicked out of house, no big deal. I got apartment downtown, but her family hates me now and will not allow her to see me. She says I must prove to them I can take care of her and family, and pay the 100,000 baht, and buy the ring. I think I am f@?&ed here. Is all of the demanding from the family normal here, or was all this just a scam from the start for the money? Thanks for taking the time to read this long ass post.

[sirocco]

if you want to buy a girl as is the case in African or Arabic countries, this is your problem. But where is love???...

[brewsterbudgen]

Not a scam, but unless you and she are prepared to stand up for yourselves it's not going to work.

[netghost]

I explained that buying people was not part of my culture and even against the law in the states, but she says that is just the culture here.

[netghost]

I tried standing up for myself, I got kicked out of the house. I told her she needed to do what she thought was right, marry for love not money, but she says she has no say in it. Everything is up to her father, do the girls here have no say in their own future?

[brewsterbudgen]

I explained that buying people was not part of my culture and even against the law in the states, but she says that is just the culture here.

Well if she agrees with what her family is asking, and you feel like that, there's no future in the relationship. Personally, I think you'd be crazy to want to continue a relationship with someone who thinks like that. But I think you know that too.

[netghost]

Sorry for the noob questions, I have only been in Thailand for six weeks now.

[netghost]

Thanks a lot for you replies Brewster. I just don't want any problems here. She has a lot of police in her family here, kind of making me nervous about a breakup.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

Plenty of available girls in Thailand, go back online, find a new one with less demands.

[Cheeby Luva]

They ask for 100,000 baht, a ring that was around 34,000 baht, not that big of a deal. The other part of it was to buy land and build a house, and get us a car, and start up a business for the family.

about par for the course if not a bit on the low end of thai demands from farang

[fatfather]

I tried standing up for myself, I got kicked out of the house. I told her she needed to do what she thought was right, marry for love not money, but she says she has no say in it. Everything is up to her father, do the girls here have no say in their own future?

If she loves you, she will back you. She is able to keep the family in check. Sure you have to care for the family, but not further than you are able to and willing to. If she don't back you, you will have a quite hard stay with this family. I wouldn't dare to try it

Fatfather

Sent from my phone

[GaoYuk]

Run for the hills mate..she'll be back online in no time looking for the next potential target..plenty of decent girls out there with a decent family..non of this farang ATM bozwollocks..

[arunsakda]

Another absurd troll.

How many pages will this go on for? Up to all of you.

I'm out.

Regards,

arunsakda

Edited May 9, 2014 by arunsakda

[netghost]

Thanks for the replies everyone. I guess I will find out if she has a backbone or not.

[kriswillems]

Nowadays, when being put on the spot, most families will let you marry their daughter without demanding money.

A family that really insists on paying is not a good start.

I would try to get out of it, because eventually your girlfriend might choose the side of the family (even if she doesn't do it now), and you'll be the black sheep.

Edited May 9, 2014 by kriswillems

[Som wat]

Agree.

Unfortunately the money is in a locked international transfer account due to tax discrepancies.

It costs 50k baht to free the full amount, if they can get it together.

Take the 50k baht.

Exit stage left.

[tolsti]

Sounds like that BA was a waste of time eh? May be it was actually a BS....... or even a B(ridge) D(weller)

[A1Str8]

It's the way it is with very very low people. Give them a break as they are so low, they are not even aware of it.

However do NOT let them use you, rip you off etc. You are not supposed to take care of the whole family. You are not supposed to take care of the girl either but if it is your choice to do so, do it. But skip the whole family as you are in love with the woman not them. They showed it to you very quickly what kind of disgusting people they are so just forget them. They ain't worth a thought. Focus on the girl. If you love each other keep her. If not and she acts like her family then get rid of her.

Sent from my GT-I9500 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[Skint]

Now you are in Thailand time to cheat on her

[transam]

I hope that many guys are reading your story.

You have been duped, your not the first and for sure you will not be the last. Turn around and walk away, difficult I know but trust me........

[netghost]

Yeah, she is saying she has no say in it. She is sneaking downtown to see me a couple times a week, but her family can't find out. She is not even supposed to be talking to me anymore. I do love her, but it seems like an impossable task.

[netghost]

Agree.

Unfortunately the money is in a locked international transfer account due to tax discrepancies.

It costs 50k baht to free the full amount, if they can get it together.

Take the 50k baht.

Exit stage left.

rofl

[CaptainPeacock]

...oh boy looks like this is going to end up being same same multi-page...thread anyone for...

[Skint]

You realize the braces are fakes, the girls get them done for 200 baht and milk their farangs for 1k up

[HooHaa]

After one month her father demanded I marry her or leave the house.

me thinks you have your answer

[apiwan]

Your getting mugged off royally .

If you can't see that .

Pay.pay.pay and be happy

Sent from my SM-N9005 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[ALFREDO]

Sin Sod, the dowry for the girl and some Gold is more or less normal and usually higher with a Falang, your sums seem not to high,

the immediately house building, buying and purchase of a car is not so common awaited in short time. But sure appreciated!

To take care of the family of wife, is common at least in some ways and in affordable borders!

So if she is a traditional Thai, some of that what she and her family asks for, is common practice in many families here in Thailand.

Special in rural Issan.

So find a consensus in a discussion, if you feel its worth the effort.

Edited May 9, 2014 by ALFREDO

[muchogra]

Unless there's something that you are not telling us, why would anybody even ask what you should do!

[benalibina]

You realize the braces are fakes, the girls get them done for 200 baht and milk their farangs for 1k up

Never heard of this 1.....you know more atypical scams ?

[Tywais]

One flame, one reply to it and one inappropriate comment removed.