Dowry

[keithkarmann]

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I never tire of reading of these relationships built on financial rewards...what has love got to do with it?

Is that that you Tina?

Anthropologist John Townsend concludes "that men are susceptible to youth and beauty, whereas women are susceptible to status and security. These differences are part of a natural selection process where males seek many healthy women of childbearing age which will mother offspring, whereas women seek men who are willing and able to take care of them and their children."

So what's your problem? Nature taking its course?

But most of these old dudes have had a vasectomy?
What does that do for Mr. Townsends' theory?

I don't know. Do you think it would make men chase menopausal women instead of young nubile women? Ha ha ha not in Thailand where us older men are considered so hansum and can score women 36 years younger (or 17 years in my case). Have you heard the perfect age of a woman theory? - half your age plus 7. That's how old my lovely lady is. So Mr OP is only out by 11.5 years = 63/2 + 7 = 38.5 years.

I've got a different calculation, I am 62 and 6+2 = 8 my girlfriend is 26 and 2+6 =8 that makes us a perfect match next year it will be 6+3 and 2+7 which both equal 9 the year after it will be 10 and after that 11. Then when I am 66 and she is 30 there may be a problem. Probably I will have to change my plan to exchange for a younger model when she reaches 30 if I want to keep the house.

[shadmo63]

If you hang in there till you're 70 and she 34 you'll be ok again. And when you're 86 -> 86/2 + 7 = 50. PERFECT!!

[ramrod711]

My wife was 35 when I met her, I was 53 we lived together for 4 years before we married. We went to the Amphur, paid the money, 2 of her cousins came as witnesses. I paid no sinsod, I do however send her parents 3,000 baht per month. They are in their 70s have only the 700 baht per person pension to live on. I built my wife a house because I wanted her to have it, I have a registered lease because her siblings may not be as honest as my wife. I think you have a good heart and care for the woman, do what your heart tells you.

[shadmo63]

My wife was 35 when I met her, I was 53 we lived together for 4 years before we married. We went to the Amphur, paid the money, 2 of her cousins came as witnesses. I paid no sinsod, I do however send her parents 3,000 baht per month. They are in their 70s have only the 700 baht per person pension to live on. I built my wife a house because I wanted her to have it, I have a registered lease because her siblings may not be as honest as my wife. I think you have a good heart and care for the woman, do what your heart tells you.

Could you explain more about the house and lease details? Her land? What is a registered lease and why? Yes agree abut heart

[larsjohnsson]

Does your 36 year younger GF love you? And is that the reason she have asked you many times to marry her?

Edited June 11, 2014 by larsjohnsson

[F4UCorsair]

My wife was 35 when I met her, I was 53 we lived together for 4 years before we married. We went to the Amphur, paid the money, 2 of her cousins came as witnesses. I paid no sinsod, I do however send her parents 3,000 baht per month. They are in their 70s have only the 700 baht per person pension to live on. I built my wife a house because I wanted her to have it, I have a registered lease because her siblings may not be as honest as my wife. I think you have a good heart and care for the woman, do what your heart tells you.

"Good heart" means different things to different people/races.

I think westerners take it to mean that you share good will.

To many others it means you share your wealth, no more, and no less, not good will, just wealth.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

My wife was 35 when I met her, I was 53 we lived together for 4 years before we married. We went to the Amphur, paid the money, 2 of her cousins came as witnesses. I paid no sinsod, I do however send her parents 3,000 baht per month. They are in their 70s have only the 700 baht per person pension to live on. I built my wife a house because I wanted her to have it, I have a registered lease because her siblings may not be as honest as my wife. I think you have a good heart and care for the woman, do what your heart tells you.

"Good heart" means different things to different people/races.

I think westerners take it to mean that you share good will.

To many others it means you share your wealth, no more, and no less, not good will, just wealth.

"Good heart" is a phrase almost exclusively used by Thai sex workers and their English speaking foreign customers.

Never ever heard a legit Thai use it in Thai or English translation.

Edited June 11, 2014 by AnotherOneAmerican

[F4UCorsair]

My wife was 35 when I met her, I was 53 we lived together for 4 years before we married. We went to the Amphur, paid the money, 2 of her cousins came as witnesses. I paid no sinsod, I do however send her parents 3,000 baht per month. They are in their 70s have only the 700 baht per person pension to live on. I built my wife a house because I wanted her to have it, I have a registered lease because her siblings may not be as honest as my wife. I think you have a good heart and care for the woman, do what your heart tells you.

"Good heart" means different things to different people/races.

I think westerners take it to mean that you share good will.

To many others it means you share your wealth, no more, and no less, not good will, just wealth.

"Good heart" is a phrase almost exclusively used by Thai sex workers and their customers.

Never ever heard a legit Thai use it in Thai or English translation.

And on Asian dating sites Another One!! Perhaps they're synonymous with 'Thai sex workers'??

I apologize for my negativity.

[AYJAYDEE]

My wife was 35 when I met her, I was 53 we lived together for 4 years before we married. We went to the Amphur, paid the money, 2 of her cousins came as witnesses. I paid no sinsod, I do however send her parents 3,000 baht per month. They are in their 70s have only the 700 baht per person pension to live on. I built my wife a house because I wanted her to have it, I have a registered lease because her siblings may not be as honest as my wife. I think you have a good heart and care for the woman, do what your heart tells you.

"Good heart" means different things to different people/races.

I think westerners take it to mean that you share good will.

To many others it means you share your wealth, no more, and no less, not good will, just wealth.

"Good heart" is a phrase almost exclusively used by Thai sex workers and their customers.

Never ever heard a legit Thai use it in Thai or English translation.

then you have never ventured outside the bar. that is a very common phrase in any village. you should get out more

[F4UCorsair]

My wife was 35 when I met her, I was 53 we lived together for 4 years before we married. We went to the Amphur, paid the money, 2 of her cousins came as witnesses. I paid no sinsod, I do however send her parents 3,000 baht per month. They are in their 70s have only the 700 baht per person pension to live on. I built my wife a house because I wanted her to have it, I have a registered lease because her siblings may not be as honest as my wife. I think you have a good heart and care for the woman, do what your heart tells you.

"Good heart" means different things to different people/races.

I think westerners take it to mean that you share good will.

To many others it means you share your wealth, no more, and no less, not good will, just wealth.

"Good heart" is a phrase almost exclusively used by Thai sex workers and their customers.

Never ever heard a legit Thai use it in Thai or English translation.

then you have never ventured outside the bar. that is a very common phrase in any village. you should get out more

I have NEVER been in a bar in Thailand. I've ventured onto a few dating sites, and it's in common use there.

So what does it mean in villages? Share your wealth with me??

Edited June 11, 2014 by F4UCorsair

[AYJAYDEE]

I have NEVER been in a bar in Thailand. I've ventured onto a few dating sites, and it's in common use there.

So what does it mean in villages? Share your wealth with me??

have u EVER been in thailand?

[F4UCorsair]

I have NEVER been in a bar in Thailand. I've ventured onto a few dating sites, and it's in common use there.

So what does it mean in villages? Share your wealth with me??

have u EVER been in thailand?

First time in 1980, and many times since, probably more than 50 times, some stays of several months, travelled as far north as you can go, only to Hua Hin in the south, but from Sangklaburi to Nong Khai east to west. Is that enough?

During my travels, I have never heard the expression 'good heart', and only ever seen it on a couple of dating sites. When the meaning of 'good heart' became evident to me, I dropped those using it like a hot brick.

But...I have never been in a bar, been in plenty of restaurants, bought plenty of beer from 7/11's and convenience stores, but never in a bar.

Edited June 11, 2014 by F4UCorsair

[shadmo63]

Are we talking about "jai dee"? ใจดี. Pretty common I would have thought in and out of a bar.

[keithkarmann]

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If you hang in there till you're 70 and she 34 you'll be ok again. And when you're 86 -> 86/2 + 7 = 50. PERFECT!!

Wow you are good at maths, I will stay with number two from 66 to 70

[keithkarmann]

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Does your 36 year younger GF love you? And is that the reason she have asked you many times to marry her?

Not sure if she loves me or my wallet

[F4UCorsair]

<script type='text/javascript'>window.mod_pagespeed_start = Number(new Date());</script>

Does your 36 year younger GF love you? And is that the reason she have asked you many times to marry her?

Not sure if she loves me or my wallet

It's not important provided you're comfortable with the arrangement. I'm not comfortable with a much younger woman, but I don't condemn those who are, even though I speculate on the actual relationship. I've probably strolled down Soi Nana Sukhumvit too many times and seen grubby old western men, beer in hand, staring at the street/ceiling, and their much younger girls are tapping the mobile 'phone, equally disinterested.

In my working life, the flight attendants had a definition for pilots. Dildo's with wallets!!

Edited June 11, 2014 by F4UCorsair

[merlen10002]

I had two marriages to Thai ladies, the first no Dowry asked for or given, the lady was from Bangkok and Bangkok ladies don't normally ask for a dowry, Most ladies from Issan are the ones that ask for a dowry but not all. the second lady her family asked for a dowry she is from Issan, I said no Dowry, I explained to her family why I would not pay a Dowry, my now wife before she lived with me worked 6 days a week long hours as most Thais do, she lived in a small room with no toilet or shower or cooking had to share shower and toilet with people from three other rooms, bought her food never cooked, the room had no window no bed or furniture, she slept on a thin foam mattress on the floor, it was ฿2,500 a month, not good living standard, when she moved in with me she was living in a two bed room two bathroom aircon nice condo large swimming pool on the second floor, stopped work and improved her life style a lot. I gave her ฿40,000 for the wedding that included renting the wedding clothes all alcohol food and money for the eight monks anything over was hers to do as she liked, 60 people was at the wedding, I don't think she had a lot left over, I told her family I would take good care of her and give her a good life and I was marrying her not the family, they did not want to understand but my wife told them she would marry me anyway, I have never given any of her family money, never been asked for money, my wife now works in her own shop and never asks me for money she buys all her own clothes, personal things with her salary, I pay the rent buy the food run the car and motor bike pay water and elec. we never argue or fight have a great life together and she is a real good sort.

If it is necessary pay a large dowry for a Thai lady to marry you and give her family money you have the wrong lady, I can give many cases that no dowry was paid, in fact most Thai - Foreigner marriages no dowry is asked for or paid, if the lady really wants to be with you she will marry you with out a dowry. in many cases if a dowry is paid is pissed away very quick by the family and it only lets them think they can get money any time from you.

There are millions of Thai ladies out there very easy to get another one even if your an old bloke, ugly, fat or drink a lot, can even get a real good sort and a good lady. paying a dowry is just stupid if you don't have a lot of money, if you have a lot of money you can do as you please.

Buying and building houses in Thailand is another no no, not necessary if you are not a very rich man, rich men can spend money on anything and it does not matter because they have plenty.

If anyone wants to comment on spelling or grammar don't bother you are not wanted here.

[AYJAYDEE]

I had two marriages to Thai ladies, the first no Dowry asked for or given, the lady was from Bangkok and Bangkok ladies don't normally ask for a dowry, Most ladies from Issan are the ones that ask for a dowry but not all. the second lady her family asked for a dowry she is from Issan, I said no Dowry, I explained to her family why I would not pay a Dowry, my now wife before she lived with me worked 6 days a week long hours as most Thais do, she lived in a small room with no toilet or shower or cooking had to share shower and toilet with people from three other rooms, bought her food never cooked, the room had no window no bed or furniture, she slept on a thin foam mattress on the floor, it was ฿2,500 a month, not good living standard, when she moved in with me she was living in a two bed room two bathroom aircon nice condo large swimming pool on the second floor, stopped work and improved her life style a lot. I gave her ฿40,000 for the wedding that included renting the wedding clothes all alcohol food and money for the eight monks anything over was hers to do as she liked, 60 people was at the wedding, I don't think she had a lot left over, I told her family I would take good care of her and give her a good life and I was marrying her not the family, they did not want to understand but my wife told them she would marry me anyway, I have never given any of her family money, never been asked for money, my wife now works in her own shop and never asks me for money she buys all her own clothes, personal things with her salary, I pay the rent buy the food run the car and motor bike pay water and elec. we never argue or fight have a great life together and she is a real good sort.

If it is necessary pay a large dowry for a Thai lady to marry you and give her family money you have the wrong lady, I can give many cases that no dowry was paid, in fact most Thai - Foreigner marriages no dowry is asked for or paid, if the lady really wants to be with you she will marry you with out a dowry. in many cases if a dowry is paid is pissed away very quick by the family and it only lets them think they can get money any time from you.

There are millions of Thai ladies out there very easy to get another one even if your an old bloke, ugly, fat or drink a lot, can even get a real good sort and a good lady. paying a dowry is just stupid if you don't have a lot of money, if you have a lot of money you can do as you please.

Buying and building houses in Thailand is another no no, not necessary if you are not a very rich man, rich men can spend money on anything and it does not matter because they have plenty.

If anyone wants to comment on spelling or grammar don't bother you are not wanted here.

you are not able to tell us what MOST THAI- FARANG marriages require or if a dowry is paid. and you are also not able tp tell us what happens to MOST of the dowrys that are paid.

[shadmo63]

My first Thai wife English teacher Isaan girl married 1992 no sin sod asked for, but we married and lived in Australia. Admittedly I'd never heard of sin sod back then. Current gf Lanna girl, Uni degree but 60 hrs/week factory job a bit offended when I asked about sin sod, but she gets a nice middle class life as a house wife in Thailand. So sin sod - 0 out of 2 here. Oh both divorcees early thirties no children. Yes I'm upgrading to a newer model. This time an only child (first wife one of 10 mostly nasty siblings) and pretty sure not an adulterer or a gambler like the first one. And she wants a house built on parents land in Chiang Rai province but I'll wait a few years and am closer to retiring before committing to that. I am pretty sure she's a keeper but - to be sure to be sure.

[larsjohnsson]

Does your 36 year younger GF love you? And is that the reason she have asked you many times to marry her?

Not sure if she loves me or my wallet

Why marry her then ?

[bangkoklasse]

I had two marriages to Thai ladies, the first no Dowry asked for or given, the lady was from Bangkok and Bangkok ladies don't normally ask for a dowry, Most ladies from Issan are the ones that ask for a dowry but not all. the second lady her family asked for a dowry she is from Issan, I said no Dowry, I explained to her family why I would not pay a Dowry, my now wife before she lived with me worked 6 days a week long hours as most Thais do, she lived in a small room with no toilet or shower or cooking had to share shower and toilet with people from three other rooms, bought her food never cooked, the room had no window no bed or furniture, she slept on a thin foam mattress on the floor, it was ฿2,500 a month, not good living standard, when she moved in with me she was living in a two bed room two bathroom aircon nice condo large swimming pool on the second floor, stopped work and improved her life style a lot. I gave her ฿40,000 for the wedding that included renting the wedding clothes all alcohol food and money for the eight monks anything over was hers to do as she liked, 60 people was at the wedding, I don't think she had a lot left over, I told her family I would take good care of her and give her a good life and I was marrying her not the family, they did not want to understand but my wife told them she would marry me anyway, I have never given any of her family money, never been asked for money, my wife now works in her own shop and never asks me for money she buys all her own clothes, personal things with her salary, I pay the rent buy the food run the car and motor bike pay water and elec. we never argue or fight have a great life together and she is a real good sort.

If it is necessary pay a large dowry for a Thai lady to marry you and give her family money you have the wrong lady, I can give many cases that no dowry was paid, in fact most Thai - Foreigner marriages no dowry is asked for or paid, if the lady really wants to be with you she will marry you with out a dowry. in many cases if a dowry is paid is pissed away very quick by the family and it only lets them think they can get money any time from you.

There are millions of Thai ladies out there very easy to get another one even if your an old bloke, ugly, fat or drink a lot, can even get a real good sort and a good lady. paying a dowry is just stupid if you don't have a lot of money, if you have a lot of money you can do as you please.

Buying and building houses in Thailand is another no no, not necessary if you are not a very rich man, rich men can spend money on anything and it does not matter because they have plenty.

If anyone wants to comment on spelling or grammar don't bother you are not wanted here.

A more nuanced and accurate post than the ones that I see from the "sin sod fan boy".

Agree with you also

[thailiketoo]

Does your 36 year younger GF love you? And is that the reason she have asked you many times to marry her?

Not sure if she loves me or my wallet

Why marry her then ?

There comes a time in most men's lives when they can take care of someone besides themselves. Maybe make another person's life a little better. Maybe make her family's life a little better. Maybe make the world a better place. I'm not going to invent the cure for a disease but my money allowed her father to live a bit longer without pain.

I could be living by myself. She chose to marry me. I do more things for her than she does for me. When she makes an error I don't mention it. When she is happy perhaps I'm due a bit of credit for that.

I married her because it makes me feel good. My memorial will be her house and comfort when I'm gone.

Edited June 11, 2014 by thailiketoo

[AnotherOneAmerican]

Are we talking about "jai dee"? ใจดี. Pretty common I would have thought in and out of a bar.

Very rare with legit Thais, foreigner males hear it all the time because they mostly interact with female Thai sex workers.

Any girl saying that (English or Thai) in my home village would me marked out in a second.

Anyone claiming it was in common use without their speaking Thai, I would discount their opinion.

Edited June 11, 2014 by AnotherOneAmerican

[merlen10002]

I had two marriages to Thai ladies, the first no Dowry asked for or given, the lady was from Bangkok and Bangkok ladies don't normally ask for a dowry, Most ladies from Issan are the ones that ask for a dowry but not all. the second lady her family asked for a dowry she is from Issan, I said no Dowry, I explained to her family why I would not pay a Dowry, my now wife before she lived with me worked 6 days a week long hours as most Thais do, she lived in a small room with no toilet or shower or cooking had to share shower and toilet with people from three other rooms, bought her food never cooked, the room had no window no bed or furniture, she slept on a thin foam mattress on the floor, it was ฿2,500 a month, not good living standard, when she moved in with me she was living in a two bed room two bathroom aircon nice condo large swimming pool on the second floor, stopped work and improved her life style a lot. I gave her ฿40,000 for the wedding that included renting the wedding clothes all alcohol food and money for the eight monks anything over was hers to do as she liked, 60 people was at the wedding, I don't think she had a lot left over, I told her family I would take good care of her and give her a good life and I was marrying her not the family, they did not want to understand but my wife told them she would marry me anyway, I have never given any of her family money, never been asked for money, my wife now works in her own shop and never asks me for money she buys all her own clothes, personal things with her salary, I pay the rent buy the food run the car and motor bike pay water and elec. we never argue or fight have a great life together and she is a real good sort.

If it is necessary pay a large dowry for a Thai lady to marry you and give her family money you have the wrong lady, I can give many cases that no dowry was paid, in fact most Thai - Foreigner marriages no dowry is asked for or paid, if the lady really wants to be with you she will marry you with out a dowry. in many cases if a dowry is paid is pissed away very quick by the family and it only lets them think they can get money any time from you.

There are millions of Thai ladies out there very easy to get another one even if your an old bloke, ugly, fat or drink a lot, can even get a real good sort and a good lady. paying a dowry is just stupid if you don't have a lot of money, if you have a lot of money you can do as you please.

Buying and building houses in Thailand is another no no, not necessary if you are not a very rich man, rich men can spend money on anything and it does not matter because they have plenty.

If anyone wants to comment on spelling or grammar don't bother you are not wanted here.

you are not able to tell us what MOST THAI- FARANG marriages require or if a dowry is paid. and you are also not able tp tell us what happens to MOST of the dowrys that are paid.

You are very pro Dowry/ Sin Sot, same same, and that is your right, but you are making total dill of yourself by trying to shot down every negative post against the Dowry, try reading Thailand Fever written by a Thai expert on Thailand it is a very good account of many things Thai and Western people should know about Thailand and its people and culture, will do you a world of good. and stop making an idiot of yourself.

[bangkoklasse]

Does your 36 year younger GF love you? And is that the reason she have asked you many times to marry her?

Not sure if she loves me or my wallet

Why marry her then ?

There comes a time in most men's lives when they can take care of someone besides themselves. Maybe make another person's life a little better. Maybe make her family's life a little better. Maybe make the world a better place. I'm not going to invent the cure for a disease but my money allowed her father to live a bit longer without pain.

I could be living by myself. She chose to marry me. I do more things for her than she does for me. When she makes an error I don't mention it. When she is happy perhaps I'm due a bit of credit for that.

I married her because it makes me feel good. My memorial will be her house and comfort when I'm gone.

You don't have to marry her to do that. He can help her father or give them a house without being married.............

[bangkoklasse]

I had two marriages to Thai ladies, the first no Dowry asked for or given, the lady was from Bangkok and Bangkok ladies don't normally ask for a dowry, Most ladies from Issan are the ones that ask for a dowry but not all. the second lady her family asked for a dowry she is from Issan, I said no Dowry, I explained to her family why I would not pay a Dowry, my now wife before she lived with me worked 6 days a week long hours as most Thais do, she lived in a small room with no toilet or shower or cooking had to share shower and toilet with people from three other rooms, bought her food never cooked, the room had no window no bed or furniture, she slept on a thin foam mattress on the floor, it was ฿2,500 a month, not good living standard, when she moved in with me she was living in a two bed room two bathroom aircon nice condo large swimming pool on the second floor, stopped work and improved her life style a lot. I gave her ฿40,000 for the wedding that included renting the wedding clothes all alcohol food and money for the eight monks anything over was hers to do as she liked, 60 people was at the wedding, I don't think she had a lot left over, I told her family I would take good care of her and give her a good life and I was marrying her not the family, they did not want to understand but my wife told them she would marry me anyway, I have never given any of her family money, never been asked for money, my wife now works in her own shop and never asks me for money she buys all her own clothes, personal things with her salary, I pay the rent buy the food run the car and motor bike pay water and elec. we never argue or fight have a great life together and she is a real good sort.

If it is necessary pay a large dowry for a Thai lady to marry you and give her family money you have the wrong lady, I can give many cases that no dowry was paid, in fact most Thai - Foreigner marriages no dowry is asked for or paid, if the lady really wants to be with you she will marry you with out a dowry. in many cases if a dowry is paid is pissed away very quick by the family and it only lets them think they can get money any time from you.

There are millions of Thai ladies out there very easy to get another one even if your an old bloke, ugly, fat or drink a lot, can even get a real good sort and a good lady. paying a dowry is just stupid if you don't have a lot of money, if you have a lot of money you can do as you please.

Buying and building houses in Thailand is another no no, not necessary if you are not a very rich man, rich men can spend money on anything and it does not matter because they have plenty.

If anyone wants to comment on spelling or grammar don't bother you are not wanted here.

you are not able to tell us what MOST THAI- FARANG marriages require or if a dowry is paid. and you are also not able tp tell us what happens to MOST of the dowrys that are paid.

You are very pro Dowry/ Sin Sot, same same, and that is your right, but you are making total dill of yourself by trying to shot down every negative post against the Dowry, try reading Thailand Fever written by a Thai expert on Thailand it is a very good account of many things Thai and Western people should know about Thailand and its people and culture, will do you a world of good. and stop making an idiot of yourself.

A very good post

[khunPer]

<script type='text/javascript'>window.mod_pagespeed_start = Number(new Date());</script>

Does your 36 year younger GF love you? And is that the reason she have asked you many times to marry her?

Not sure if she loves me or my wallet

»You can’t buy love, but you can buy something that looks exactly like love…«

As long as both parts are happy and feel good, does it matter…?

Many posters have mentioned warnings about ladies aged in the twenties and that they will quickly leave, and also about age difference. Well, I had a number of friends in their 40’ies who had Thai girlfriends in their 20’ies, one on 45 had one at 20, and they lasted for long time and are all later happily married. Okay only some 20-25 years age difference.

There is (only) 32 years between me and my Thai girlfriend, we have been together now for 10½ year, since she was 22…

OP, if you feel good and feel it’s right for you, go ahead – as long as you are aware of potential financial risk and can afford it…

[larsjohnsson]

Does your 36 year younger GF love you? And is that the reason she have asked you many times to marry her?

Not sure if she loves me or my wallet

»You can’t buy love, but you can buy something that looks exactly like love…«

As long as both parts are happy and feel good, does it matter…?

Many posters have mentioned warnings about ladies aged in the twenties and that they will quickly leave, and also about age difference. Well, I had a number of friends in their 40’ies who had Thai girlfriends in their 20’ies, one on 45 had one at 20, and they lasted for long time and are all later happily married. Okay only some 20-25 years age difference.

There is (only) 32 years between me and my Thai girlfriend, we have been together now for 10½ year, since she was 22…

OP, if you feel good and feel it’s right for you, go ahead – as long as you are aware of potential financial risk and can afford it…

Per, but are you married and have paid dowry? Or built a house on her parents land? That's the important questions when talking about the age difference in this case. If the answer is no to those questions. And It's just a normal GF. Then it doesn't matter if there are 80 years difference

[thailiketoo]

Does your 36 year younger GF love you? And is that the reason she have asked you many times to marry her?

Not sure if she loves me or my wallet

»You can’t buy love, but you can buy something that looks exactly like love…«

As long as both parts are happy and feel good, does it matter…?

Many posters have mentioned warnings about ladies aged in the twenties and that they will quickly leave, and also about age difference. Well, I had a number of friends in their 40’ies who had Thai girlfriends in their 20’ies, one on 45 had one at 20, and they lasted for long time and are all later happily married. Okay only some 20-25 years age difference.

There is (only) 32 years between me and my Thai girlfriend, we have been together now for 10½ year, since she was 22…

OP, if you feel good and feel it’s right for you, go ahead – as long as you are aware of potential financial risk and can afford it…

Per, but are you married and have paid dowry? Or built a house on her parents land? That's the important questions when talking about the age difference in this case. If the answer is no to those questions. And It's just a normal GF. Then it doesn't matter if there are 80 years difference

Who made you the judge of what is normal?

[Robert24]

I've browsed through most postings on this topic from today and would like to clarify a few things from my point of view because some comments are misleading or not correct.

1) Sin Sod

Some have commented that this not really practiced by Thais anymore and is only used by Thai girls to get money from their foreign boyfriends. I would say this opposite is true from my experience. The practice of paying Sin Sod is an old tradition still practiced by Thais in all regions, regardless whether this is Isaan, North, Central, East or South. It's also independent of religion, Muslims in the South pay it as well. It also doesn't matter whether you are poor or rich, celebrities, rich business people as well as farmers practice this tradition.

Now I cannot say how it is practiced between foreigners and Thais since some clearly articulated that they didn't pay Sin Sod and still got married with a Thai woman. However I would like to point out that this is rather unusual as the common question from all friends and families of your Thai woman will be about how much Sin Sod was paid.

2) How much to pay

Some have suggested to not pay more than 50k. I must say this is rather low and can be an insult especially if your future wife has a decent background. If she is university educated, has a well paid job, her parents do very well, she has never been married before and no kids, you will be expected to pay a lot more. If your wife is from a good background and you have a good background as well, expect to pay at least 400-500k and some Gold. Some of my friends have paid quite a bit more than that. The amount is usually agreed between the 2 families and since the expat's family is unlikely to be here, I guess you will have to talk to her parents. Suggest to do this yourself and not through your future wife, if language is a problem bring a Thai speaking friend along who helps translating. You can also agree to get the money back after the wedding, i.e. say you want to use the money to buy or build a house to live in, I think this is likely accepted by the other family. Or you can also say that you want everything back maybe except the Gold you gave. It's entirely up to you to negotiate something acceptable for you.

3) Thai language

Some have suggested that the term jai dee (good heart) is only used by prostitutes or sex workers. I would like to emphasize that this is a common expression used by all Thai speaking people, regardless of your background. Same applies to jai dam, jai ien, jai khaeng, etc etc. There are many other expressions with Jai in the Thai language, The Thai speakers amongst the readers in this forum will be well aware of that.

Hope this helps. Clearly everyone has strong opinions on this which I accept. And again as I previously posted, the below link may provide some further useful information on Sin Sod.

http://www.thethailandlife.com/sin-sod