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Diamond in the rough...


Jp9052

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I've been to Thailand many times, having lived in the region for a while. I even had somewhat steady relationship for weeks or months at a time. I'm a successful executive, in shape and Thai women (good and "bad") seem to think I'm attractive. Armed with all this, my attitude has been to "party" and satisfy my carnal desires spanning over a decade now and had great fun...

Well, during my last trip to Bangkok recently, I met a girl I can't keep out of my mind and wanted your opinion please!

I went to this one night club every night for a week, mainly to drink and listen to live music, downing about one bottle per day. I am fun when I am drunk and a decent tipper. Goes without saying, I was remembered and popular with the staff. Well, one young lady in particular caught my eyes throughout the week and she definitely showed interest as well (along with a few others). We exchanged some numbers and finally went out the last two nights.

She has since left that club and serving as a waitress in one of bars near Nana where she used to work before. She may have been fired because of me. She never asked for money, but I gave her some before leaving the country.

She doesn't speak English, wants a "passport", saying she is studying English for me... She doesn't dress like a working girl, but a bit risqué when we went out. Oh, she is 23 and I'm 44, but pass for 35. She is different than any other (many regular and working girls) girl I've met and I am grasping for a possibility that she is a "good girl" and this can some work from US. I can only visit every 6 months, but trying to find a job which will allow me to do more, just for her...

Keen on hearing from some of you who have been in a similar situation... Thanks.

Connor

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Marry her immediately as I am sure you are quite correct re Diamond, don't worry about the language barrier ( no need to in depth heart to hearts right? ), this seems to be a relationship from the heavens. Please let us all know the wedding day...

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Sorry about starting at a wrong location. New here.

Book man - noted, but I have aged better than most and swim a mile per day, so will take some comfort in that.

Ulysses - I think you are in the majority, especially those who know Thailand.

AlexRRR - That's why I'm wrecking my brain. Of all the girls over dozen years, she stands out by far. This is the classic head versus heart. I'm an executive making multi six figures, so I have some smarts, but perhaps not in this case... :)

I don't expect her to go without sex for 6 months and I don't think I can, so that's not promising. However, someone tell me servers wearing sports jerseys in bargirl bars or discos are quite different than freelancers, especially if they are innocent, young and don't speak other languages...?

I'm grappling here... :)

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Sorry about starting at a wrong location. New here.

Book man - noted, but I have aged better than most and swim a mile per day, so will take some comfort in that.

Ulysses - I think you are in the majority, especially those who know Thailand.

AlexRRR - That's why I'm wrecking my brain. Of all the girls over dozen years, she stands out by far. This is the classic head versus heart. I'm an executive making multi six figures, so I have some smarts, but perhaps not in this case... smile.png

I don't expect her to go without sex for 6 months and I don't think I can, so that's not promising. However, someone tell me servers wearing sports jerseys in bargirl bars or discos are quite different than freelancers, especially if they are innocent, young and don't speak other languages...?

I'm grappling here... smile.png

Just keep thinking with the big head and not the small one and you should be OK.

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A serious question. Where do you get your work suits?

I need a durable but smart suit that can take a few knocks and scrapes as I go from the factory floor to the boardroom and need to be smart.

As a multi six figure earning executive your suits must take some knocks as you climb out from under the bridge each morning.

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Sigurris,

I don't wear suits much unless important critical customer meetings. Not sure if this is a slam, joke, or what, but apologies if I offended anyone. Just wanted to provide much info as I can. I am in US, so it's not atypical. All I can say is get into anything medical, which I am in. Obamacare is going to feed many of us in the business for a long time...

My request for some additional opinions still stand... Thanks folks...

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Please pass full contact details, name, phone number, place of work, etc.. Feel free to post a picture too.

While you are waiting for her US visa approval, we will 'take care' your girlfriend and make sure your love investment is soundly vetted.

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Jacky54 - in my heart, I know you are right, but seeking hope... :)

David48 - I'm new here, so not sure what you are asking...

So, is the conclusion that one can't find true love from any venue which enables bar girls or freelancers to be "active"? I have had a girlfriend from CM2 for a few months, but found out she had another boyfriend. She finally married him, a German lawyer...

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Boy you guys are tough. I have not been on this forum for several years, but wanted some info, so was just looking around.

I see so many of you are really jaded and cold.

Connor.....22 years ago, I had a "Movie Star" quality GF, and had built a nice Teak wood house up on a hill side over a lake. I was passing through Bangkok, and planning on catching a flight to my home the next day. I had stopped by some non-descript Thai resturant for some lunch. The waitress could not understand my Thai...Afer repeating the order 3 times, a group of 3 Thai girls ask me...."what you want", I told them in Thai and they repeated it to the waitress. I replied "That is exactly what I said" and they all started laughing hysterically at me.

Just on a whim, I told them I was going to a very nice resturant that night, and I wanted them to come as my "translators". (Turns out they worked in a sewing factory, and one person was the owner). The owner did not want to come, but the other 2 did because they were Thai, it was free food, and also it was a nice resturant. I gave one of the 100 baht for taxi.

They showed up 40 minutes late (Thai custom), and I found out the owner came from Isan, had only gone to school for 3 years, got fed up with being a maid, borrowed a bunch of money and started her buisness. (Paid all the money back in 7 months). She was 27 at that time.

Over the next 2 years as I would pass through Bangkok, I would take her and some of her worker for food..(never anything romatic). They were just fun hard working people. On day when I was at my mountain house, I found out my GF was also getting money from a guy in England,and another in Germany. Somehow when cooking in a wok, the oil spilled down the stove caught fire, and my house burned down, and I left thinking to never come back to Thailand (broken heart...) I got to Bangkok, and was flying out a 6 Am the next morning and called my friends to come have a last dinner with me. (I swore I would never come back to Thailand...ever....ever...ever). The owner of the sewing company started crying ...saying I don't know why Thai people are like that...both men and women....that is why I decided to never get married...I have never had a boyfriend...I see in my village, and in my company what happens all the time.

Well 2 months later after a lot of consideration, decided I had been fishing in the wrong pool. I had always been a trophy hunter. Maybe what I shoudl look at was a really good heart, and a strong work ethic.

I went back, used my "Silver tounge devil" skill and married that girl 20 years ago...and I could not be happier. We live well, plus have accumulated a small stack of Chanotes, that cover some farms and resort property.

So Conner....ignore these guys, sometimes these things do work out. We host what I call "The Thai Mafia" parties at my home regularly with 15-20 Thai wives with farang husbands. I have a large home, with a good karaoke system, wood fired pizza oven large wood deck and a beautiful view of Mt Raineer. Naturally there is a ton of Thai food, and me men sometimes will do the pizza, and BBQ some steaks...Even the Thai consulate has attended a few of the parties when they are in town.

Choke Dee Conner.giggle.gif

Do not seek to follow in the footsteps of the men of old; seek what they sought.

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Old Wanderer, that's what I was hopping fifth. My 44 years in this earth had not producecd the feeling I had for her...

Nottocus - you may be able to bring closure to thus for me if you can tell me the first letter of her her first name.

I warn to buy some of you drinks when I return in September. Teach me the ways if you will...

Cheers,

Conner

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Jacky54 - will keep that in mind, but not ready to call her a prostitute. I think she wants security and she is a hard worker, although as a server in bars... I can give her salary easy enough, but I would rather she be busy.

Nottocus - I am not sure if you were referring to the girl from CM2, girl of this topic, but without any substantiation, I have to assume you were commenting on a "type" of girls, because I have met them. DIR may very we'll be playing the field to increase the odds, but not sure if I can't blame her if I can't be there to provide for her...

Cheers guys,

Conner

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Three..... Two.....

To the OP. You do a lot of swimming and exercise, good on you, but this "I am fun when I am drunk", nothing wrong with a social drink, but why do you have to get drunk? I pity any lady who is ever involved with you. You may think you are "fun when your drunk" but I think that any decent lady would not agree with that.

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I know... Odds are against this... If I live in Thailand, may be... The fact she doesn't speak English is one of the things attracts me toto her... She is a server (those younger girls in sports uniforms)... I thought that made some difference, but you guys don't seem to think that matters... Shame... I decided to let her go and go back to the reality. Cheers fellas...

Conner

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Three..... Two.....

To the OP. You do a lot of swimming and exercise, good on you, but this "I am fun when I am drunk", nothing wrong with a social drink, but why do you have to get drunk? I pity any lady who is ever involved with you. You may think you are "fun when your drunk" but I think that any decent lady would not agree with that.

You mean you actually get drunk on one bottle a day? You already have a problem if you drink every day. All that good exercise going to waste.

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You guys are right of course. I need some help with courage with ladies, even in Thailand. I drink like that when in Thailand and not all by myself of course. I also don't exercise much. I'm on vacation and act differently. In the real world, though I try to do better...

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Hi Jp,

You sound like an intelligent person in most of your words and I am assuming you are Male but you could be female; I do not think you are asking for advice I think you are looking for opinions, from people who have been there done that; so this is mine before I read any other replies.

I think there are a few chinks in your armour:

You say: “I'm a successful executive, in shape and Thai women (good and "bad") seem to think I'm attractive.” – Thai women say this to most of us wherever you go in Thailand bars and clubs.

You say: “Armed with all this, my attitude has been to "party" and satisfy my carnal desires spanning over a decade now and had great fun...” – Most of us have done this at some point and have now found a special person to settle with and we are now living a very different life here. Some it suits but some it does not suit, many are happier doing what they did before and there is nothing wrong with that if it’s good for they; enjoy your life in doing what you want to do and what gives you happiness.

You say: “Well, during my last trip to Bangkok recently, I met a girl I can't keep out of my” – living in Thailand this happens a lot as there are so many beautiful available women here you are not alone in this, sit down have a cup of coffee or tea coffee1.gif and think it through what are the consequences short and long term, and then do what you want to do to make yourself happy and deal with the consequences. One word of warning MONEY how much can you afford to loose if it goes wrong? Slowly with your spending don’t buy her houses, cars etc at this time, stick to gold and inexpensive items, beware of gold though a lot of it here is crap quality and is only worth scrap value if you want to sell.

You say: “I am grasping for a possibility that she is a "good girl" “She has since left that club and serving as a waitress in one of bars near Nana where she used to work before. She may have been fired because of me. She never asked for money, but I gave her some before leaving the country.” – remember Bar Girls are in it for the money it is their job and it is their income if they don’t get money they don’t eat, buy new cloths or put a roof over their heads, so they will say and do whatever is needed to get as much money as quickly as possible because their working career is short, but in saying that there are some really nice caring people working in the bars of Thailand but there are also many sharks, and find her young before her mind has been moulded/corrupted and there is not the complication and expense of babies to consider.

You say “I'm 44, but pass for 35” – did she tell you this? because I must have heard this said a million times.

You say “She doesn't speak English”saying she is studying English for me” – no problem, she will learn quickly in conversation with you and it means she’s not been here to long.

You say “wants a "passport",... – No problem buy her a passport 1,050B takes about a week to be issued if she has a valid up to date ID card and an address to send it to. Just find a passport issuing office she completes the form (your details are not required), has her photo taken pay your money all done and her passport arrives by post, she will be over the moon with what you have done for her. This will also give you a slight indication of her past history with the authorities.

You say “She doesn't dress like a working girl, but a bit risqué when we went out.” – Surely you want your lady to look good when she is out with you, I’m sure you wouldn't want to see her dressed in flip flops and Tshirt as if she’s ready to start the decorating?

Maybe ask her (not tell her) to dress in a way that pleases you and is comfortable for her, buy her some new clothes that you both like, shop in the right places and it will cost you next to nothing and much better then giving her cash.

Only my opinion intheclub.gif

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