How to politely refuse to shake hands?

[pomchop]

As anyone who has been around Thailand knows it is fairly rare to find hot water and soap for hand washing in most toilets much less a clean towel for drying.

Add to this that a lot of farangs ,especially in bars, seem to always want to shake hands when meeting new people or even seeing familiar faces.

It's not hard to imagine that their hands are not very likely to be even remotely clean and who knows what kind of germs a hand shake can spread to YOU .

Sometimes a fist bump will work but frankly i prefer to give them a wai with no contact at all....unfortunately some don't seem to take the hint and still stick the hand out for a shake.

I always get way more colds etc in thailand than anywhere else and i suspect that dirty hand shakes may well be at least partially at fault....and yes I know that I can carry a bottle of hand sanitizer with me everywhere I go but don't really want to do that.

So what is a polite way to refuse to shake hands?

Is it rude to just flat out say sorry i don't shake hands?

Sure there are bigger things to worry about but I really don't much enjoy getting sick if it can be prevented.

[rajyindee]

Wear gloves. Or at least one.

[edwardandtubs]

Inform them you've just had a really good wank.

[RandomSand]

Don't worry about shaking hands until you're wearing a face mask as humidity alone can be a vector for transmission.

Keep calm.

[Skint]

Rubbish OP next.....

Sent from my iPad using Thaivisa Connect Thailand

[BaldPlumber]

Inform them you've just had a really good wank.

If the OP wai'd them, I think they would assume he does a lot of that anyway, well I would.

[cornishcarlos]

Buy a Captain Hook hand from a fancy dress shop...

Wear that when you go out !!

Or just stop pissing on your hand ?

[villagefarang]

I think you will have to accept the fact that in a bar environment, no matter how politely you address your aversion to hand shaking, you will get nothing but grief and ridicule.

In polite society it shouldn’t be a problem to make an excuse not to shake hands but your inebriated friends in the bar will not understand. Besides, you are touching barstools, countertops and no telling what else, so hands may not be the only thing you should be worried about.

I think your concern makes sense but you need to accept that you have no control over how it will be perceived by others, as witnessed by the responses to this post.

[pomchop]

I have in the past tried to avoid it by saying: "I have a bad cold so not sure you want to shake my hand".......that usually works as MOST people with a functioning brain prefer not to spend a week or more coughing, sneezing, and blowing their nose.

[96tehtarp]

If the setting is right I give them an elbow to shake. Sometimes I cough into my hands first.

Thai people don't usually make a habit of shaking hands.

[JoeyDaRench]

I think you will have to accept the fact that in a bar environment, no matter how politely you address your aversion to hand shaking, you will get nothing but grief and ridicule.

In polite society it shouldn’t be a problem to make an excuse not to shake hands but your inebriated friends in the bar will not understand. Besides, you are touching barstools, countertops and no telling what else, so hands may not be the only thing you should be worried about.

I think your concern makes sense but you need to accept that you have no control over how it will be perceived by others, as witnessed by the responses to this post.

Valid question, great OP.

Agree with this response from VF.

Most of the other responses though are probably why this CR sub-forum seems to get little attention.

I suspect that most would never say in person what they write in anonymity.

I can't figure out why subjects here always seem to go that way.

Oh well.

JDR

[Loptr]

Trying to avoid germs in SEA is much like trying to avoid the heat, it's not going to happen unless you live in a bubble... Embrace the germs, they will make your immune system stronger...

[Paul888]

I don't think there is a polite way to swerve an offered hand. Men of a certain age shake hands almost instinctively, and it is rude to leave people hanging.

Just keep a tube of that hand sanitizer gel in your pocket and clean your hands after, or you could try going out wearing a skirt. That might work.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

Avoid bars where foreigners hang out.

Works for me!

[pomchop]

I don't think there is a polite way to swerve an offered hand. Men of a certain age shake hands almost instinctively, and it is rude to leave people hanging.

Just keep a tube of that hand sanitizer gel in your pocket and clean your hands after, or you could try going out wearing a skirt. That might work.

Hell if I wear a skirt they might want to kiss me.....i'd look pretty ugly but that sure wouldn't stop some of them.

[losgrad]

Studies show, even when soap and water are available, the majority of men do not wash their hands after using the toilet.

I avoid shaking hands by giving a fist pump or something similar. If the guy is insistent, I carry the hand sanitizer and offer it to them while using it myself. Sure, there are many other ways to pick up germs during a night out, but I concern myself with the ones I can control.

I know guys who are coughing into their hands the moment they exit the plane and then don't understand why I don't want to shake their hand. Which one of us is being rude?

Take care of yourself.

P.s. I read one scientific study that estimated 2,000 different combinations of 'cold' viruses/germs. As a senior citizen, ive probably had a few hundred in my lifetime so I don't think I'll develop immunity or resistance to them all in multiple lifetimes even with reincarnation .

Edited August 13, 2014 by losgrad

[toybits]

Another Farang who thinks he is much cleaner than the locals. Ha ha...

[BaldPlumber]

Just how many wierdo's are there here walking around with hand sanitisers, fisting people and avoiding their own countrymen?

[edwardandtubs]

The irony is the hand sanitisers are antibacterial and have no effect against the viruses the OP most fears.

[toybits]

Locals Wai

Farangs shake hands.

I believe the OP's anxiety about shaking hands is misplaced.

[harrry]

If you are concerned about it,and it is true you can get germs and viruses on your hands and catch them through this, or opening a door or picking up a glasss, why not get a small bottle of the alchahol hand wash which is available at every pharmacy or 7-11 and wipe your hands with this regularly. It is actually a good idea to do this whethe you have friends to shake your hands or not.

[yoslim]

wear something like this:

[PHP87]

A small container of the aforementioned hand sanitizer.

Something people should be using regularly anyways.

[bobbyd1]

A simple Thai Wai will do

[Rumblecat]

Well, obviously a wai won't suffice as he says he's tried it and it won't.

To me it's something I wouldn't worry about- if your worried about germs then surfaces, walls, glasses, light switches, door handles... the air itself... these are what I'd worry about.

Or go to a big pharmacy and pick up some of these to carry in your pocket-

http://www.firstaidglobalwholesale.com/SANITIZERS_AND_DISINFECTANTS/handsanitizerpouches.htm

[xen]

i presume a kiss on the cheek is not the answer either .

[ezzra]

Permanently walk around with a strait jacket...

[overherebc]

Is your Great Uncle Howard still in that hotel room ?

[harrry]

http://www.hitchedmag.com/article.php?id=862

gives some advice on this.

[jamhar]

Even in the western world, most do not wash their hands properly

1 in 10 didnt bother to wash at all after using the toilet.

http://metro.co.uk/2013/06/18/be-honest-do-you-wash-your-hands-after-you-go-to-the-toilet-3844526/

From the article "14% of the bank notes had traces of faecal matter"

Its probably much worse for farangs in Thailand.

To refuse a handshake is a breach of etiquette in the western world

You can soften it a little by explaining your postion

but the overall effect will not be as positive as simply shaking the hand.

My take is that the tables, hand rails at Central, the surfaces inside a taxi,

door knobs, the buttons on the ATM, the waitress butt you just patted, ect

are most likely much worse than the hand that's being offered.

Take the hand, smile and make an excuse to go wash it asap if you're that worried over it.

If you're worried that much about hygiene, Thailand isn't the place for you.

But then again, most likely, neither is the US, Canada, Oz or Europe.

Just my 2 cents..

Edited August 14, 2014 by jamhar