Stradavarius37 Posted August 20, 2014 Share Posted August 20, 2014 Maybe the OP is not worth talking to? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
daveAustin Posted August 20, 2014 Share Posted August 20, 2014 Hi-so, lo-so, they're all gone in the head op. This one obviously likes to be on control and doesn't have respect for you. Having said that, it could be so much worse. I would just roll with it and use her in-kind. Just pop out when you fancy a proper knobber. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pgrahmm Posted August 20, 2014 Share Posted August 20, 2014 (edited) Thai women like strong men....so far the only strong you showed was voicing your bank card problem and she gave you all in her purse.....grow a pair - assert yourself....make it a point to get what you want - take her to dinner - YOU pay - possible that when men paid before they wanted her for dessert - but YOU live with her - take her out for night on the town - stop and look at things - chat - laugh - admire.....make it known what you want around the house - you are the man of the house act like it.....it all can be done in a subtle manner....a lot of the men in Thailand are strong yet quiet and that's possibly the way she was raised...... My FIL is a very quiet person but he is the undisputed family leader - the only change my wife has ever seen him make in routine is that now he allows me also to take a leadership role in his presence when all of us are together - frankly I think he's glad to share it in situations rather than be the pillar all the time.....and I appreciate the respect and don't over step my position..... So - be a source of strength to her - show her how much you care not how much you question or dissapprove.....don't forget they are great at reading body language - much better than us.....reason - don't shout - sway don't push.....make it fun..... If it doesn't work - well you've given the best you got..... I know of one guy that can't even get a GF in Thailand for God's sake!!!!!!!!!!!....he's whiney and looking for/using pity while mooching ALL the time looking for the opening to take advantage - had the same MO as in the US - didn't have a chance there either - - - - - don't turn out like him - he's a lousy excuse for human being...... Edited August 20, 2014 by pgrahmm 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theguyfromanotherforum Posted August 20, 2014 Author Share Posted August 20, 2014 <script type='text/javascript'>window.mod_pagespeed_start = Number(new Date());</script> Hi-so, lo-so, they're all gone in the head op. This one obviously likes to be on control and doesn't have respect for you. Having said that, it could be so much worse. I would just roll with it and use her in-kind. Just pop out when you fancy a proper knobber. I think this is probably what it is. Control. I just think she wants to show me she can live without a guy and doesn't need money. She actually mentioned that a few times early in the relationship. Thai women like strong men....so far the only strong you showed was voicing your bank card problem and she gave you all in her purse.....grow a pair - assert yourself....make it a point to get what you want - take her to dinner - YOU pay - possible that when men paid before they wanted her for dessert - but YOU live with her - take her out for night on the town - stop and look at things - chat - laugh - admire.....make it known what you want around the house - you are the man of the house act like it.....it all can be done in a subtle manner....a lot of the men in Thailand are strong yet quiet and that's possibly the way she was raised...... My FIL is a very quiet person but he is the undisputed family leader - the only change my wife has ever seen him make in routine is that now he allows me also to take a leadership role in his presence when all of us are together - frankly I think he's glad to share it in situations rather than be the pillar all the time.....and I appreciate the respect and don't over step my position..... So - be a source of strength to her - show her how much you care not how much you question or dissapprove.....don't forget they are great at reading body language - much better than us.....reason - don't shout - sway don't push.....make it fun..... If it doesn't work - well you've given the best you got..... I know of one guy that can't even get a GF in Thailand for God's sake!!!!!!!!!!!....he's whiney and looking for/using pity while mooching ALL the time looking for the opening to take advantage - had the same MO as in the US - didn't have a chance there either - - - - - don't turn out like him - he's a lousy excuse for human being...... Dude.... I always take her out for dinner.... at least 5 times a week and I do pay. I also took her to a few expensive trips. I mentioned in my first post that I do not actually like the fact I live for free in her house. She however, prefers to eat her loso Thai food and most of the time I think I just bother her with a more upscale eateries. I gotta let you on a little secret about this "leadership" thing from both a rich gal and this average one I am with. Leadership simply means the man is there to provide financial support by taking care of his wife. This was mentioned to me flat out by both girls (I know my experience is not vast, but they were both girls from a totally different social circle). I also don't think I am weak.... unless lately I have been battling asthma and that's what makes me weak physically. I do appreciate your input and taking the time to provide some intelligent points. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
choochoo Posted August 20, 2014 Share Posted August 20, 2014 (edited) op hasnt moved out yet? It Has to be the FreE rent.................lol. Edited August 20, 2014 by choochoo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pgrahmm Posted August 20, 2014 Share Posted August 20, 2014 Leadership requires no money.....it's a quality....but...right now she is the leader and controls her money....probably just the way she is comfortable......house rules and it's her house/home.....might have been different if you were established and viewed as successful and she had come into your home....it looks as if she is a strong individual....it also seems she had your back but unknown how she views this....up for you to make/stay or break it.....does not seem like you are happy....either change something in house or remove yourself from the situation - if she misses you there's a reason to restart....either way the future is what you make it or accept..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Somsrisonphimai Posted August 20, 2014 Share Posted August 20, 2014 No sex and no communication? These are the core of the relationship, so what is the point of the relationship? Since she is pretty independent, she does not need you financially and emotionally that is why there is a lack of communication, so you can either take her or leave her. Were you attracted to her independent at first? If so, why should this be an issue? Also know this that most Thai women are reserved and don't like to express themselves especially with their significant other. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cypress Hill Posted August 20, 2014 Share Posted August 20, 2014 I can't understand why this is such a drama. You should've nipped all this nonsense in the bud but you've allowed it to fester. You should've made it clear that just because you moved in, it didn''t mean you left your stones outside BUT YOU DIDN'T so now she might see you as a nag. Stop looking for logic; there IS none. You played it wrong. There's no shame in that - everyone makes mistakes so grab your <deleted>, say goodbye and get yourself a condo with YOUR shit, YOUR way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JLCrab Posted August 20, 2014 Share Posted August 20, 2014 The only two Thai females I've ever been close to I don't believe ever had a shell. But they both had Crabs! They maybe got them from your sex tourist mates Great -- another guy that watched too much from Chubby Brown. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jacksam Posted August 21, 2014 Share Posted August 21, 2014 Think op may have started a thead about wanting to teach English becuse quote ...im bored. As usual, I may be wrong. Thinking this like an attention seeking thing. OP doesn't or rather shouldn't need advice about about this. He is right about one thing. She may want to marry. She may be tired of fact he is a sponge living rent free. Was about to say he must be good sh*g, but he ain't into that I have a solution. Just ask her, be insistent and if she says nothing then hit the road. Unless your addicted to the free lunch. Finally if your your not overly fussed about sex and dont communicate then why live with someone. Rent is cheap inLOS Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BillyBobThai Posted August 21, 2014 Share Posted August 21, 2014 After reading all of these postings, I have decided that the OP must be a 10 yr boy getting his jollies. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tubby johnson Posted August 22, 2014 Share Posted August 22, 2014 Some men need to man up urgently. Especially the OP. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joepattaya1961 Posted August 22, 2014 Share Posted August 22, 2014 It's not working.... yes. Moving on is sometimes tricky. You think you will find better then you discover 10 different issues you didn't have with a previous girlfriend. I am thinking now that I am in Thailand what crap I am going to have to deal with if I "move on". Crap like girl in debt, girl sending money to her family, girl cheating, lazy gf with no job, stupid, worrying about STD's, etc..... I have none if these problems with my current girl. Communication is a big issue for me, though. Despite all the high-psycho replies...........don't worry. It's not very common for Thai to talk about issues they're bothered with/about. Even if you see that something is definitely wrong....the answer to your question: "What's wrong?" will be consequently: "Nothing!!" Talking about a problem or an issue is kinda loss of face and that's not done. The only talk is most of the time about money and since your GF is rather independent, there is almost no talk at all. Thai's are masters in talking for hours about nothing........the so called small talk!! It's one of the reasons that Facebook is so immense popular in Thailand..........people who are to shy to bother other people write their deepest feelings on there.........very annoying especially if you find out that your partner seems to feel shit about something and refuses to talk about it while she is posting it on facebook. Also Buddha has weird tenants. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jacksam Posted August 22, 2014 Share Posted August 22, 2014 Sad thing is we who have replied to the OP, have sort of been sucked in. I mean who is that lame to start a tread like this. Then sit back taking cheap shots ...implying he doesnt need to pay for a companion. I suggest your " paying " a far greater price by acting like someone with no balls. Either your content or not. If not DO SOMETHING. Adress the issues or leave. How did you get on with "want to teach post because im bored" Cant wait for the next sardine on the fishing line. Yes clearly im on holiday with gf. We talk a lot, but like most thai, loves yhe facebook thing. Can you start another enthralling post. Maybe....Im finding myself attracted to ladyboys, anyone in my boat " Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dagobert Posted August 22, 2014 Share Posted August 22, 2014 "There you have it" problem solved set up a face book acount then you can have all your private and special moments together quietly online, with the rest of the world watching ! Smart man that Joepattaya 1961. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sipi Posted August 22, 2014 Share Posted August 22, 2014 Have some fun with your girl, "Mai bpen rai", lighten up, be a little playful. She's still with you isn't she? If she didn't like you she would do the Thai thing and move on. Give it some more time. Apart from that, yes there is obviously some issues. Have you met her parents? Can you speak to her friends, siblings? If you get a good Thai lady you will be happy for life, trust me.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThaidDown Posted August 22, 2014 Share Posted August 22, 2014 My wife has her own businesses, her own money and can be very independent so I showed her the OP and asked her to give me an opinion. Sorry to report that, after one week, she has not got back to me with an answer yet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iphad Posted August 22, 2014 Share Posted August 22, 2014 Personally I would move on. The only problem would be what would I do for the next 20 minutes to an hour finding the next g/f. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dagobert Posted August 22, 2014 Share Posted August 22, 2014 If the OP has a spare 20 minutes this might help. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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