Is Thai bar girl different to most?

[scoteng]

Well I said I would keep you guys updated whether it was good or bad. The question was is thai bar girl different to most? Well the answer as I have discovered now is NO!

She's not been the same recently with me, although in bits she's been ok. For the first time since I have met her a big red flag has come up. The last 2 days she has pretty much ignored me, which has never happened before. I did Skype her and to my amazement she answered and I asked her what she was doing to which her reply was I don't know I cannot speak English, sorry today I cannot speak with you bye bye, and that was it. She was in a car at the time and I could hear thai being spoken in the background. Have said numerous things to her on Facebook since which she was ignored, apart from she said briefly that she has errands to run and that she is very tired. So she has gone from speaking to me throughout each day to not at all pretty much for 2 days, so obviously at this point I am massively suspicious and almost certain she is with someone.

So tonight I get a Facebook message off a random thai girl and I ask her why she want speak with me. She say she is girlfriend of my girlfriends ex partner. She tells me that right now they are together in her room, and that it's being going on for about 4 months now. Usually one day a week they see each other she says to me and that my girlfriend has been giving him money around 30-40k baht. She has been tracking him with gps on her phone and she said only time he didn't see her was July, and that makes sense as I was with her in July. I do find it weird that she has only contacted me about this now, especially as this is the only suspicious activity I have witnessed with my girlfriend. She skypes me a couple of times a day and always speaks to me on Facebook at all times pretty much, and this is the only time this has happened like this. She says my girlfriend wants him back now and that my girlfriend hates her a lot.

So there we have it. She is like most other bar girls sleeping around. She says she doesn't bar fine but I think with the amount of money she is giving him plus a couple of bits of jewellery that I have noticed on her recently, that I can pretty much confirm that she is doing bar fines as well. I do still find it weird that this is the only suspicious activity and then this girl gets in touch just now and not before. See what my ex girlfriend has to say for herself if she ever decides to talk to me. I have not let on that I know, so I am ready for the lies.

I was due to go see her for 3 weeks in November I just thank god that I have not yet booked flights and hotel yet, phew! Don't get me wrong I am gutted about this and I will miss her a lot, but least it's pushed me into doing something that I thought was probably right anyway, but just couldn't break it off with her as I cared for her a lot. At least now I can get on with my life and not have to worry everyday what she is up to. Whether she ever loved me or not I don't know, but I don't regret this as I have experienced Thailand and enjoyed her company. She helped me get over my long term ex girlfriend and I feel no anger towards her over this. Just got to accept this is the thai way for most of them. One thing I would like is an explanation, whether or not I get one I doubt it but we'll see.

One thing is for sure that this is over and I will learn from it and also I do have to apologise for me being naïve on here and not listening to people's advice who live and have experienced a lot more things in Thailand than I have. I admit I take my pants down that you were all right all along...... Thanks for reading

[pgrahmm]

It's really hard to have a long term relationship if you don't have a baseline of at least a continous 6 months and should be longer....Come over in Nov and party down and just enjoy without entanglement.....in spite of everything that happened you had a good time and received solid advice that will help you moving forward....good luck.....

[AYJAYDEE]

Well I said I would keep you guys updated whether it was good or bad. The question was is thai bar girl different to most? Well the answer as I have discovered now is NO!

She's not been the same recently with me, although in bits she's been ok. For the first time since I have met her a big red flag has come up. The last 2 days she has pretty much ignored me, which has never happened before. I did Skype her and to my amazement she answered and I asked her what she was doing to which her reply was I don't know I cannot speak English, sorry today I cannot speak with you bye bye, and that was it. She was in a car at the time and I could hear thai being spoken in the background. Have said numerous things to her on Facebook since which she was ignored, apart from she said briefly that she has errands to run and that she is very tired. So she has gone from speaking to me throughout each day to not at all pretty much for 2 days, so obviously at this point I am massively suspicious and almost certain she is with someone.

So tonight I get a Facebook message off a random thai girl and I ask her why she want speak with me. She say she is girlfriend of my girlfriends ex partner. She tells me that right now they are together in her room, and that it's being going on for about 4 months now. Usually one day a week they see each other she says to me and that my girlfriend has been giving him money around 30-40k baht. She has been tracking him with gps on her phone and she said only time he didn't see her was July, and that makes sense as I was with her in July. I do find it weird that she has only contacted me about this now, especially as this is the only suspicious activity I have witnessed with my girlfriend. She skypes me a couple of times a day and always speaks to me on Facebook at all times pretty much, and this is the only time this has happened like this. She says my girlfriend wants him back now and that my girlfriend hates her a lot.

So there we have it. She is like most other bar girls sleeping around. She says she doesn't bar fine but I think with the amount of money she is giving him plus a couple of bits of jewellery that I have noticed on her recently, that I can pretty much confirm that she is doing bar fines as well. I do still find it weird that this is the only suspicious activity and then this girl gets in touch just now and not before. See what my ex girlfriend has to say for herself if she ever decides to talk to me. I have not let on that I know, so I am ready for the lies.

I was due to go see her for 3 weeks in November I just thank god that I have not yet booked flights and hotel yet, phew! Don't get me wrong I am gutted about this and I will miss her a lot, but least it's pushed me into doing something that I thought was probably right anyway, but just couldn't break it off with her as I cared for her a lot. At least now I can get on with my life and not have to worry everyday what she is up to. Whether she ever loved me or not I don't know, but I don't regret this as I have experienced Thailand and enjoyed her company. She helped me get over my long term ex girlfriend and I feel no anger towards her over this. Just got to accept this is the thai way for most of them. One thing I would like is an explanation, whether or not I get one I doubt it but we'll see.

One thing is for sure that this is over and I will learn from it and also I do have to apologise for me being naïve on here and not listening to people's advice who live and have experienced a lot more things in Thailand than I have. I admit I take my pants down that you were all right all along...... Thanks for reading

dont cancel your trip. does this girlfriend work in bars? if not go see her! but go anyway, you never know what will happen now that youre wiser!

[Gecko123]

Scoteng:

It's good to hear from you. I think I speak for many others when I say we've missed you, and have wondered how things have been going. You've got a lot of character coming back and giving everyone an update. Thanks.

I'm not overly surprised to hear that the ex-husband popped back up on the scene. I live in a small village, and over the years have watched girls head down to Bangkok and Pattaya seeking their fortunes. A really common pattern is for a girl to get married in their teens, have a kid or two, breakup with their husband, and suddenly have to figure out for the first time in their life how they are going to support themselves and their kids. The local work options aren't very attractive, especially if the girl has only a 9th grade education (which is sadly very common).They end up heading to Bangkok and Pattaya lured by stories from older girls in the village of making easy money. Many end up coming back to the village after a short stint away because they realize that the life of a bar girl/go-go dancer/massuse, etc. isn't to their liking.

In hindsight it does sound like your girlfriend was telling you the truth when she said she hated the bar scene. It sounds like she was hedging her bets, and ultimately decided the best alternative was to come home and patch things up with her boyfriend/ex-husband. I know there are many exceptions to this, but one thing I have noticed about Thai men and women is that once they have children together, if there is subsequent infidelity, this doesn't always mean that the couple will split up. Under the circumstances you've described I would definitely not attempt to pursue this relationship further.

Above all else, the thing which makes getting involved with a bar girl such a crap shoot is you just don't know anything about her background. In many ways these girls are products of their environment and for a foreigner to really understand her, you've got to know where she's come from. A bar is such a completely artificial environment, and it's really hard to get to know someone during a month long vacation because it's not real world. When you throw in language barrier problems and cultural differences, it is really easy to let your imagination fill in the missing gaps, and presto - - you think you've found your soulmate and wedding bells are ringing in your ears. Any hints of incompatability are brushed aside as "cultural differences." But in reality, you really know very little about her.

As for your finding out about this before you purchased the plane tickets - - dude, you are a lucky guy!

Falling in love with anyone - - even a bar girl - - is an affirmation of your humanity, and don't let anyone here or elsewhere tell you otherwise.

I'll leave you with a quote from 'The Straw Men' by Michael Marshall:

'So what do you care? What was she - a working girl?'

As if whores and addicts were little more than unwanted pets,

as if they had never run laughing to the return of a parent,

or said a first word,

or spent long nights wondering what their stocking would hold.

Edited September 16, 2014 by Gecko123

[55Jay]

It's like back to the future from Page 1 of this thread. LOL.

[scoteng]

Scoteng:

It's good to hear from you. I think I speak for many others when I say we've missed you, and have wondered how things have been going. You've got a lot of character coming back and giving everyone an update. Thanks.

I'm not overly surprised to hear that the ex-husband popped back up on the scene. I live in a small village, and over the years have watched girls head down to Bangkok and Pattaya seeking their fortunes. A really common pattern is for a girl to get married in their teens, have a kid or two, breakup with their husband, and suddenly have to figure out for the first time in their life how they are going to support themselves and their kids. The local work options aren't very attractive, especially if the girl has only a 9th grade education (which is sadly very common).They end up heading to Bangkok and Pattaya lured by stories from older girls in the village of making easy money. Many end up coming back to the village after a short stint away because they realize that the life of a bar girl/go-go dancer/massuse, etc. isn't to their liking.

In hindsight it does sound like your girlfriend was telling you the truth when she said she hated the bar scene. It sounds like she was hedging her bets, and ultimately decided the best alternative was to come home and patch things up with her boyfriend/ex-husband. I know there are many exceptions to this, but one thing I have noticed about Thai men and women is that once they have children together, if there is subsequent infidelity, this doesn't always mean that the couple will split up. Under the circumstances you've described I would definitely not attempt to pursue this relationship further.

Above all else, the thing which makes getting involved with a bar girl such a crap shoot is you just don't know anything about her background. In many ways these girls are products of their environment and for a foreigner to really understand her, you've got to know where she's come from. A bar is such a completely artificial environment, and it's really hard to get to know someone during a month long vacation because it's not real world. When you throw in language barrier problems and cultural differences, it is really easy to let your imagination fill in the missing gaps, and presto - - you think you've found your soulmate and wedding bells are ringing in your ears. Any hints of incompatability are brushed aside as "cultural differences." But in reality, you really know very little about her.

As for your finding out about this before you purchased the plane tickets - - dude, you are a lucky guy!

Falling in love with anyone - - even a bar girl - - is an affirmation of your humanity, and don't let anyone here or elsewhere tell you otherwise.

I'll leave you with a quote from 'The Straw Men' by Michael Marshall:

'So what do you care? What was she - a working girl?'

As if whores and addicts were little more than unwanted pets,

as if they had never run laughing to the return of a parent,

or said a first word,

or spent long nights wondering what their stocking would hold.

Thank you, it's nice of you to say. She hasn't gone home, the guy lives in Bangkok. As far as I am aware he is not an ex husband or father of her child. What I don't get is why his girlfriend has just told me now? And why she is still with him? Is it normal for thai girls to accept this kind of arrangement of their boyfriends going off to see other girls? What I don't understand as well is why my now ex girlfriend is completely ignoring me, but continuing to use a picture of me with her on her profile pic, and also what does she think she will get out of ignoring me? Does she think she will start speaking to me in a few days and make some lie up? I think she will find out I know anyway from the boys girlfriend at some point.

[pgrahmm]

In all honesty I think she's only an ex-girlfriend in your mind.....the pics in FB - either a more available sign or a keep away sign....but there's no telling how many FB pages she has - maybe one for every chapter in her life.....possible even she feels she still has somewhat of a hook in you and is letting you dangle as part of the reeling in process.....making you guess/need/want her more maybe fishing for $$$$ at the suggestion of her pimp/boyfriend <> which just might be what he is to both of them if not more than that....yes - some Thai women are loosey goosey about that whole situation & they are all swimming in the same sewer together - breeding ground for trouble.....and it was there waiting for you - now it will be some other poor shmuck - or 3.....

Now you - can turn the page....don't waste any more brain matter over the situation......it's your life, you surrendered too much of it to this stranger already.....

[Berkshire]

Thank you, it's nice of you to say. She hasn't gone home, the guy lives in Bangkok. As far as I am aware he is not an ex husband or father of her child. What I don't get is why his girlfriend has just told me now? And why she is still with him? Is it normal for thai girls to accept this kind of arrangement of their boyfriends going off to see other girls? What I don't understand as well is why my now ex girlfriend is completely ignoring me, but continuing to use a picture of me with her on her profile pic, and also what does she think she will get out of ignoring me? Does she think she will start speaking to me in a few days and make some lie up? I think she will find out I know anyway from the boys girlfriend at some point.

Scot, I admire your courage and honesty to come back here and face the music. I for one will not give you the "I told you so" line. But to answer your many questions, it's rather difficult to read her mind. I will say that BG's live in sort of an alternate universe where what's considered normal in their world is not the same as mainstream society. I think I said many pages ago that the BG lifestyle will change most any girl and in short order. Too bad you never met her before she lived the life. But alas, don't try to understand, only accept.

[Gecko123]

Scoteng:

Possible scenario to consider:

OP's girlfriend wants to break up with OP, but can't because it's too stressful/emotional.

OP's girlfriend talks this over with FB friend. FB friend agrees with OP girlfriend to contact OP and pretend to tell OP a bunch of dirt, which has been tailored to sound believable with help of OP's girlfriend. Motive is to cause OP to lose interest in relationship.

This theory would explain a few things:

(1) What would motivate Facebook friend to contact OP? Revenge, yes. But if FB friend is jealous of OP's girlfriend, contacting OP only drives OP's girlfriend into the arms of Thai boyfriend? That seems contrary to FB's ultimate goal to get OP's girlfriend out of the life of Thai guy.

(2) Thai girlfriend going behind back of OP's girlfriend seems really risky for FB friend. Little skeptical that Thai woman would risk doing this, especially with a farang she's never met.

(3) Explains why OP's girlfriend's Thai boyfriend didn't get upset about OP running off with his girlfriend in July. (Thai boyfriend doesn't exist)

(4) Explains why OP's girlfriend still has OP's picture on FB profile page. (Ditto: Thai boyfriend doesn't exist)

Thais can be quite crafty at times. I can imagine the above scenario being a plot on a Thai soap opera.

Agree with pgrahmm that best thing is to not waste any more gray matter trying to figure this out. And agree with Berkshire don't try to understand, only accept. But whatever you do don't rat out the FB friend - - you could end up getting someone seriously injured or killed.

[scoteng]

Scoteng:

Possible scenario to consider:

OP's girlfriend wants to break up with OP, but can't because it's too stressful/emotional.

OP's girlfriend talks this over with FB friend. FB friend agrees with OP girlfriend to contact OP and pretend to tell OP a bunch of dirt, which has been tailored to sound believable with help of OP's girlfriend. Motive is to cause OP to lose interest in relationship.

This theory would explain a few things:

(1) What would motivate Facebook friend to contact OP? Revenge, yes. But if FB friend is jealous of OP's girlfriend, contacting OP only drives OP's girlfriend into the arms of Thai boyfriend? That seems contrary to FB's ultimate goal to get OP's girlfriend out of the life of Thai guy.

(2) Thai girlfriend going behind back of OP's girlfriend seems really risky for FB friend. Little skeptical that Thai woman would risk doing this, especially with a farang she's never met.

(3) Explains why OP's girlfriend's Thai boyfriend didn't get upset about OP running off with his girlfriend in July. (Thai boyfriend doesn't exist)

(4) Explains why OP's girlfriend still has OP's picture on FB profile page. (Ditto: Thai boyfriend doesn't exist)

Thais can be quite crafty at times. I can imagine the above scenario being a plot on a Thai soap opera.

Agree with pgrahmm that best thing is to not waste any more gray matter trying to figure this out. And agree with Berkshire don't try to understand, only accept. But whatever you do don't rat out the FB friend - - you could end up getting someone seriously injured or killed.

This theory could be possible but I don't think it is the case although some part of this could be true. I remember back in May received a Facebook message from a random Thai guy and it was a picture of him and my girlfriend together, but it was an older picture as she looked younger. Now this is the guy in question. I have looked back on her old profile she had on Facebook and there is a few pictures with this same guy. I also remember now the girl who contacted me yesterday was pointed out by my girlfriend that she is with her ex now. She said to me that he was no good and sold drugs. All this explains why her phone rings and cuts off our Skype calls regularly. She always says it's her mother or her friend (obviously boyfriend). Her phone rang a fair bit when I was with her 2 weeks in July and again she just said it was either mother, father, or grandma, which at least some of them were as I spoke to them briefly but I bet a lot of them were this Thai guy. I thought this girl might've been different as she showed no big red flags, and never asked me for any money ever. She also left her phone laying around freely and let me use it at my own free will, so thought she obviously has nothing to hide. Ah well it just shows you how smart these girls really are...

[thailiketoo]

. Ah well it just shows you how smart these girls really are...

It just shows how inexperienced you are. "These girls" my gosh. They are women. And women are women the world over. Good and bad; smart and not smart.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

Thank you, it's nice of you to say. She hasn't gone home, the guy lives in Bangkok. As far as I am aware he is not an ex husband or father of her child. What I don't get is why his girlfriend has just told me now? And why she is still with him? Is it normal for thai girls to accept this kind of arrangement of their boyfriends going off to see other girls? What I don't understand as well is why my now ex girlfriend is completely ignoring me, but continuing to use a picture of me with her on her profile pic, and also what does she think she will get out of ignoring me? Does she think she will start speaking to me in a few days and make some lie up? I think she will find out I know anyway from the boys girlfriend at some point.

Scot, I admire your courage and honesty to come back here and face the music. I for one will not give you the "I told you so" line. But to answer your many questions, it's rather difficult to read her mind. I will say that BG's live in sort of an alternate universe where what's considered normal in their world is not the same as mainstream society. I think I said many pages ago that the BG lifestyle will change most any girl and in short order. Too bad you never met her before she lived the life. But alas, don't try to understand, only accept.

Replace 'bar girl' with 'Thai girl'.

It's the way many live their entire life.

Loose knickers and passing from guy to guy (kids or no).

I don't understand it either, it's just the way it is.

On the other hand, if they weren't so easy, most of us wouldn't be here.

Enjoy, and move on, plenty more where that one came from (Thailand).

Edited September 16, 2014 by AnotherOneAmerican

[scoteng]

Gets better and better. This girl of my girlfriends ex is now saying that my girlfriend said to her boyfriend that I send her 30,000 baht a month. The mind boggles as to why she would lie to him about that? I have never sent her a dime ever!

[pgrahmm]

Gets better and better. This girl of my girlfriends ex is now saying that my girlfriend said to her boyfriend that I send her 30,000 baht a month. The mind boggles as to why she would lie to him about that? I have never sent her a dime ever!

So....is the ex's ex ex eyeing the money from her ex's ex ex thinking that her friend's ex could be her next as she's now an ex due to your ex's ex ex?????

Edited September 16, 2014 by pgrahmm

[scoteng]

Gets better and better. This girl of my girlfriends ex is now saying that my girlfriend said to her boyfriend that I send her 30,000 baht a month. The mind boggles as to why she would lie to him about that? I have never sent her a dime ever!

So....is the ex's ex ex eyeing the money from her ex's ex ex thinking that her friend's ex could be her next as she's now an ex due to your ex's ex ex?????

Ha ha probably something along those lines. Just to say though that these 2 have never been friends. Only enemies it appears.

[metisdead]

A nonsense troll post has been removed.

[thailiketoo]

Gets better and better. This girl of my girlfriends ex is now saying that my girlfriend said to her boyfriend that I send her 30,000 baht a month. The mind boggles as to why she would lie to him about that? I have never sent her a dime ever!

I'm sorry but is this an INTERNET relationship? Why do you think anyone would be remotely interested except for other INTERNET Lotharios? One doesn't have relationships on the INTERNET. The whole thing is cyber humping nothing to do with reality. If I'm wrong correct me but it sure sounds like some kids on the INTERNET spoofing reality.

Edited September 16, 2014 by thailiketoo

[scoteng]

Gets better and better. This girl of my girlfriends ex is now saying that my girlfriend said to her boyfriend that I send her 30,000 baht a month. The mind boggles as to why she would lie to him about that? I have never sent her a dime ever!

I'm sorry but is this an INTERNET relationship? Why do you think anyone would be remotely interested except for other INTERNET Lotharios? One doesn't have relationships on the INTERNET. The whole thing is cyber humping nothing to do with reality. If I'm wrong correct me but it sure sounds like some kids on the INTERNET spoofing reality.

I met her in Thailand in March and spent time with her and returned to see her again in July. I had a planned to go see her for 3 weeks in November, but thank god I delayed booking it.

[scoteng]

Anyway after telling this girl that I have not sent my girlfriend any money I am assuming she told her boyfriend and then my girlfriend found out. She has deleted her Facebook account now, so I go to Skype and ask her why she do all this and all I got was shut up you don't want me then she is just ignoring. All I want is her to say to me why all this has happened and give me some kind of explanation. It's hard for it to be that's it, it's over just out of the blue and her not saying anything. Anyway hopefully other people read this thread and learn from it like I have now.

[pgrahmm]

This isn't a thread it's a frickin' millinery supply.....and she can't answer you it's the Thai way/face/responsibilty thing....she's flying/lying by the seat of her pants with some guidance from her boyfriend and the girls in the bar.....to her you don't deserve/get an explanation - everything is face value to her and mystery/need/want to know on your side...if you hadn't asked for help here and taken the pie in the face you might have endured a lot more on your road to enlightenment.....

Our culture demands answers/details/appolgies....then quite often that get turned into leverage and counter demands......the Thai culture demands none of that - thus no blame/shame or in many instances consequences.....

Our cultures are loaded with anti anxiety medications/strokes/heart ailments/early stress related deaths/alimony and child support/ruined lives - their culture just kind of floats/bounces along.....

Read Thai Fever & Private Dancer

[buhi]

This isn't a thread it's a frickin' millinery supply.....and she can't answer you it's the Thai way/face/responsibilty thing....she's flying/lying by the seat of her pants with some guidance from her boyfriend and the girls in the bar.....to her you don't deserve/get an explanation - everything is face value to her and mystery/need/want to know on your side...if you hadn't asked for help here and taken the pie in the face you might have endured a lot more on your road to enlightenment.....

Our culture demands answers/details/appolgies....then quite often that get turned into leverage and counter demands......the Thai culture demands none of that - thus no blame/shame or in many instances consequences.....

Our cultures are loaded with anti anxiety medications/strokes/heart ailments/early stress related deaths/alimony and child support/ruined lives - their culture just kind of floats/bounces along.....

Read Thai Fever & Private Dancer

I'm floating, but I need Scotroll to go forward, the next chapter remains in suspense.

This ending is all anti climax!

Scotroll has watched a few Thai soaps ; no it cannot end here!

[thailiketoo]

Anyway after telling this girl that I have not sent my girlfriend any money I am assuming she told her boyfriend and then my girlfriend found out. She has deleted her Facebook account now, so I go to Skype and ask her why she do all this and all I got was shut up you don't want me then she is just ignoring. All I want is her to say to me why all this has happened and give me some kind of explanation. It's hard for it to be that's it, it's over just out of the blue and her not saying anything. Anyway hopefully other people read this thread and learn from it like I have now.

I think you misunderstood me. The above transpired on the INTERNET or by phone right? You saw the lady for a few hours and now have invented a relationship with a computer. Of the hours you have spent messing with this chick what percent has been in person? 1%? You are living in a virtual world like so many with long distance relationships and confusing virtual reality with reality. It's not the same.

[scoteng]

Anyway after telling this girl that I have not sent my girlfriend any money I am assuming she told her boyfriend and then my girlfriend found out. She has deleted her Facebook account now, so I go to Skype and ask her why she do all this and all I got was shut up you don't want me then she is just ignoring. All I want is her to say to me why all this has happened and give me some kind of explanation. It's hard for it to be that's it, it's over just out of the blue and her not saying anything. Anyway hopefully other people read this thread and learn from it like I have now.

I think you misunderstood me. The above transpired on the INTERNET or by phone right? You saw the lady for a few hours and now have invented a relationship with a computer. Of the hours you have spent messing with this chick what percent has been in person? 1%? You are living in a virtual world like so many with long distance relationships and confusing virtual reality with reality. It's not the same.

No I have seen her in person for 5 weeks total. See her Skype everyday and was going to see her for 3 weeks I November. So for the 5 weeks that I was with her I grew attached to her, not with a computer.

[thailiketoo]

Anyway after telling this girl that I have not sent my girlfriend any money I am assuming she told her boyfriend and then my girlfriend found out. She has deleted her Facebook account now, so I go to Skype and ask her why she do all this and all I got was shut up you don't want me then she is just ignoring. All I want is her to say to me why all this has happened and give me some kind of explanation. It's hard for it to be that's it, it's over just out of the blue and her not saying anything. Anyway hopefully other people read this thread and learn from it like I have now.

I think you misunderstood me. The above transpired on the INTERNET or by phone right? You saw the lady for a few hours and now have invented a relationship with a computer. Of the hours you have spent messing with this chick what percent has been in person? 1%? You are living in a virtual world like so many with long distance relationships and confusing virtual reality with reality. It's not the same.

No I have seen her in person for 5 weeks total. See her Skype everyday and was going to see her for 3 weeks I November. So for the 5 weeks that I was with her I grew attached to her, not with a computer.

You wrote, "She then asked if I wanted her to live with me for the last week of my holiday.... I decide to revisit her in July for a couple of weeks. Total 3 weeks.

I'd suggest that most of your relationship was developed in your head - online. The virtual relationship seems real to you but it's not. It is just a virtual computer relationship.

Edited September 16, 2014 by thailiketoo

[Kabula]

Read the book Private Dancer!

Enjoy her, pay her and in time you will discover what millions of other men discovered!

Remember, always have backup!

It is less painful!

[brewsterbudgen]

Read the book Private Dancer!

Enjoy her, pay her and in time you will discover what millions of other men discovered!

Remember, always have backup!

It is less painful!

Private Dancer is a good read, but it is fiction.

[Berkshire]

Read the book Private Dancer!

Enjoy her, pay her and in time you will discover what millions of other men discovered!

Remember, always have backup!

It is less painful!

Private Dancer is a good read, but it is fiction.

True, but much of that book is based on reality. I'd say the most revealing aspect of that book is the perspective of the BG herself. Rarely do we ever get into the minds of the BG, except what the farang guy "thinks" is going on....which doesn't even tell half the story. This thread is a good example.

I'd imagine the author did his homework. I'd recommend that book just for getting the BG point of view because it would explain to the OP what could really be going on.

[AYJAYDEE]

Read the book Private Dancer!

Enjoy her, pay her and in time you will discover what millions of other men discovered!

Remember, always have backup!

It is less painful!

Private Dancer is a good read, but it is fiction.

True, but much of that book is based on reality. I'd say the most revealing aspect of that book is the perspective of the BG herself. Rarely do we ever get into the minds of the BG, except what the farang guy "thinks" is going on....which doesn't even tell half the story. This thread is a good example.

I'd imagine the author did his homework. I'd recommend that book just for getting the BG point of view because it would explain to the OP what could really be going on.

It was a poorly written melodramatic soap opera

[drgoon]

.....5.....

....4....

....3....

[Ulysses G.]

Read the book Private Dancer!

Enjoy her, pay her and in time you will discover what millions of other men discovered!

Remember, always have backup!

It is less painful!

Private Dancer is a good read, but it is fiction.

I'm pretty sure that at least half of it was based on a real person. I remember reading a factual article with a very similar premise when I had been in Thailand for a few years. The author lives in Bangkok, so knows what is going on.

Stephen Leather is one of the UK's most successful thriller writers and has written something like 30 international bestsellers. He writes well enough.

Edited September 17, 2014 by Ulysses G.