Lacking enthusiasm- any similar? One for over 60s.

[Andre0720]

But where in this world are you???

Just try visiting Thailand

[laobali]

I sympathise with you. I am 61 and have similar feelings. I have no hobbies and only one real friend in Thailand. I go to lots of parties and the local farang bar and get hammered several times a week....and this is no answer. My g/f is very understanding, but she is 15 years younger than me and really would like to do more things, but I never seem to have the energy and am tired all the time.

I have tried all sorts of stuff to revive some energy but nothing seems to work....I'm just hoping for an early death.

Maybe it's just boredom from the same routine. See my post #45.

[KhnomKhnom]

This is a very typical, dare I say normal, response to aging, to retirement, to attitudes and habits.

First, get a testosterone level test and tests for physical brain changes. Drop in T has this effect and the final news is not in about treatment because there are, surprise, side effects of T replacement therapy.

Slow deterioration of the physical brain from a variety of old age problems... Parkinson's, dementia, Old Timers, etc. .... will cause personality changes (my forthcoming book on staying married to a Thai woman has a chapter on this) that can be mildly irritating on up to dangerous especially for your care givers. This is a real situation and can not be dismissed as just a bad mood.

Second, because anti depressants are not working... I hope you got the right one for YOU, because the results of various meds vary greatly (at least one can make you roaring angry for no cause), this suggests pure attitude changes. Bear with me for an example.... if someone has the belief/attitude that the world is flat, no drugs will dissuade him short of knocking him out (be quiet CIA retirees). Same with other attitudes.

Attitudes come on as habits. Habits take work to change, rule is 30days of constant work. A person must work to create a positive attitude. Some people use food as a trigger, or use jokes (lawyer jokes work great for me), or taking a long shower upon waking. Do not urinate until you shower will eventually get you in the shower early daily. You must invent a set of triggers that will FORCE you to get up and get moving. Get a bunch of mechanical clocks and take them apart and reassemble... do something that will engage all of your mind so you are not thinking about yourself.

You can do this and not waste your golden years, but it is not easy !

[laobali]

Sorry, just re-read the OP and realised you may be in the UK, not Thailand. But a complete change of environment is still what I suggest.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

Sorry, just re-read the OP and realised you may be in the UK, not Thailand. But a complete change of environment is still what I suggest.

Probably vitamin D deficiency caused by lack of sunshine then.

Especially if he was previously living in Thailand.

Seasonal Affective Disorder

http://psychcentral.com/lib/10-things-you-dont-know-about-seasonal-affective-disorder/0002

Some claim this helps

http://www.iherb.com/product-reviews/source-naturals-gaba-calm-120-tablets/1200/?p=1

[h90]

It is a bit off topic, but maybe interesting:

I saw a lot men (might be the same for women????)

The work in the company, 60 active.....Lets say 3 men just as example:

1 retires....5 years later with 65 he aged 20 years and neither his mind nor his body is fit.

1 continues working and with 65 he exactly the same as with 60 minus a few hair

1 retires but has some strong hobby more busy than during the work....didn't change.

There is the old saying about asking a 90 year old why he is still appearing so young and active "Because I never had time to age."

Of course over simplified but maybe partially true

[laobali]

Sorry, just re-read the OP and realised you may be in the UK, not Thailand. But a complete change of environment is still what I suggest.

Probably vitamin D deficiency caused by lack of sunshine then.

Especially if he was previously living in Thailand.

Seasonal Affective Disorder

http://psychcentral.com/lib/10-things-you-dont-know-about-seasonal-affective-disorder/0002

Plenty of sunshine this year, especially on the South Coast. I actually prefer the cooler temps and daily variation here to the tropics now.

[laobali]

But where in this world are you???

Just try visiting Thailand

His name indicates he's been there, done that – and life's still a 'beach'.

[GOLDBUGGY]

I feel exactly like you. But I think it has more to do with exercise then anything else.

I decide to take time off work last year. Had many plans as I saw myself golfing twice a week and getting out a lot. But in reality I turned myself into being a couch potato. The longer I went the lazier I got. Sometimes didn't leave the house for a week. I just thought there was nothing out their I wanted to see nor had a reason to go for the sake of just going. Even gave up drinking as it bored me.

My problem is I hate exercise. Walking down these sidewalks drives me crazy. Hitting the gym has got to be the most boring thing in the world to do. I don't like jogging and never did. I like golfing but can never find a partner as they are still working so got bored with that to.

But I can't say that I feel depressed. Just lazy as they come now. So I am going to go back to work for awhile. I never felt this way when I was working. I used to get excited about just coming home then. Always had energy then to.

Maybe this relates to you to? But I am sure we are not the only ones.

[liddelljohn]

I have exactly the same feelings as the original poster

but im living the dream

lovely wife , beautiful brilliant kids , mia noi , 6 big bikes ,travel all over the world ,eat well, drink a little , and still find my life lacks a buzz and,i feel lazy and bored with life in general sex,sports adventure new things , i have seen it all nothing suprises me any more , oh i wont give up trying new things and will try working at least 3 -4 months of the year even when I dont need to, just for the mental discipline and travel opprtunities ,,,i have had all the test as well, not deppresed ,have been in the past, healthy not low testosterone ,

no i think its just that life gets empty of real possibilities and emotions

[ozyjon]

I seem to feel the same way

i know how you feel, as the years roll on the less i am bothered with anything,

i know i should feel different or be different but i have climbed the highest

mountain, swam the widest river, been to many places,, now if someone tells

me i've been here or i've been there i think to myself,, i've been there at least

over 3 times, it doesn't excite me in the least,, maybe i should consider

contributing to teenage pregnancy, at least the thought puts a smile on my face.

[Emster23]

One thing I have noticed with age (I'm 64) is that so many of the things folks get worked up over and pursue with intensity seem rather silly and pointless distractions. Women, status, booze, housing, fame.... what's the point? Just more attachments. Making I am approaching some sort of Buddhahood. That's fine, whatever.

[ianf]

I humbly suggest diet. A lot of expats in Thailand eat terribly. They can't, or don't enjoy Thai food and eat appalling poor farang foods.

Humbly, I suggest doubling your food budget and eat all the healthy foods that you already know are good for you. They are not cheap in Thailand. Fruits, expensive vegetables, organic everything.

If you can get some vigorous exercise a few times a week it'll produce some endorphins which will elevate your mood.

Cut down on alcohol, caffeine, and tobacco (if you smoke).

Personally, the healthy food works every time for me... when I get the "Blaaah" as you describe.

Good luck.

You have just posted what I would have posted. I agree with this post wholeheartedly. Diet affects mood. So does to much alcohol. I am 66. I cycle about 600km a week. On Mondays I coach young Thai cyclists and I can match them in sprints and so on. Your get up and go may have got up and gone but do as this poster says: look at your diet very closely. Take some vitamin supplements. Dress young. Find an absorbing activity. For me it's a continuation of my lifelong passion: cycling. I also read a lot and listen to music. I cook and I go to the Malls with the Mrs. She even goes cycling with me from time to time. There is a health coach in San Khampaeng: he may be of value to you. Have fun lad, come on, have fun!

[paul955]

All the symptoms you describe I had around 10 years ago when i was 44 / 45. I was always the sort of guy who thought I was very strong minded and could handle any situation alone. I was that type of guy who would tell another person with these same symptoms to 'get a grip, pull themselves together, and dont wallow in self pity'. But then after a few fairly major changes in my life ( I wont bore you with the details - but i had no control over the changes ), around 6 months after these changes I found I was exactly as you describe. I couldnt see the point in getting up in the morning, It seemed like I had no goal in life, I just couldnt see a purpose to living. I didnt feel suicidal or anything like that, but just was 100 percent unmotivated about everything. Is this you?

I now looking back realise i was depressed ( never ever suffered with it before and since ). I actually sought medical help and the doctors answer was to prescribe some bloody pills. When asked if the pills would solve my problem he retorted NO BUT THEY SHOULD MAKE TO FEEL BETTER!!! I declined the tablets and realised I had to solve my problem myself, just as I had always done with past problems. This is when I relocated out to Thailand permanently, found a nice young lady, found a hobby to occupy myself ( when the lady was out ) and bingo I have never felt depressed since. That was 10 years ago.

I would ask have you experienced any big changes in your life in the last year, something that could explain your depression. You are depressed 100 per cent ( in my lowly opinion ). Please ditch the tablets and tackle this head on alone or with your partner. If you dont have a goal or reason to get up in the morning, then do something to give you that reason to get up. You can do it, I assure you.

I wish you good luck, remenber in life, never give up and strive constantly for personal fulfillment.

[aljalj]

Bummer, Beach ...

I feel the same way, and I'm still three years off your mark.

In the States, I spent an hour or more in the gym six days a week. I used a few supplements that were easily sourced at a local health food store, and were cheap. I ate clean.

After dinner, I walked down a tree-lined street, no vehicle exhaust, no snarling dogs, no burning plastic, to the bay and fished off the dock. Or up to the community college, where there were 16 tennis courts and four practice walls, and played tennis.

I went to museums, art galleries, and restaurants where the toilet paper was in the bathroom, not the on the table, and the servers made sure we were taken care of.

If I needed something for any of my various ongoing projects --- rebuilding a '66 Mustang convertible; building and finishing a piece of furniture; finding a book I heard was a good read; locating an ingredient for a new dish I wanted to make; build a house; go to the range and fire off a few hundred rounds, or the desert and shoot a thousand. The list is long and filled with things I no longer do.

Here, almost everything I have tried to accomplish is met with obstacles. Almost everyone I try to do business with, or strike up a relationship of any kind with, considers face first.

This has ultimately led me to stop trying, and do nothing. I am not someone who does nothing. I have always filled my life with interesting, and quite intentionally, smarter folks than myself, so I could learn something. Here, I have been asked, over five years, perhaps a thousand times, do I like spicy.

For me, it's the environment. Boredom is dangerous.

No, your symptoms are not a part of the normal aging process.

[aljalj]

Bummer, Beach ...

I feel the same way, and I'm still three years off your mark.

In the States, I spent an hour or more in the gym six days a week. I used a few supplements that were easily sourced at a local health food store, and were cheap. I ate clean.

After dinner, I walked down a tree-lined street, no vehicle exhaust, no snarling dogs, no burning plastic, to the bay and fished off the dock. Or up to the community college, where there were 16 tennis courts and four practice walls, and played tennis.

I went to museums, art galleries, and restaurants where the toilet paper was in the bathroom, not the on the table, and the servers made sure we were taken care of.

If I needed something for any of my various ongoing projects --- rebuilding a '66 Mustang convertible; building and finishing a piece of furniture; finding a book I heard was a good read; locating an ingredient for a new dish I wanted to make; build a house; go to the range and fire off a few hundred rounds, or the desert and shoot a thousand. The list is long and filled with things I no longer do.

Here, almost everything I have tried to accomplish is met with obstacles. Almost everyone I try to do business with, or strike up a relationship of any kind with, considers face first.

This has ultimately led me to stop trying, and do nothing. I am not someone who does nothing. I have always filled my life with interesting, and quite intentionally, smarter folks than myself, so I could learn something. Here, I have been asked, over five years, perhaps a thousand times, do I like spicy.

For me, it's the environment. Boredom is dangerous.

No, your symptoms are not a part of the normal aging process.

[BwindiBoy]

Thanks for all the replies so far.

Keep going buddy. I'm only 46 and am exactly where you are; so much to do, in a very comfortable position but have zero enthusiasm to do stuff. However, when I make the effort I do enjoy whatever it is I do - that does make it even more frustrating that I then can't be bothered the next time around. I've been like this for a few years now but it has got worse over the last couple of years. I put mine down to depression to a degree and have been on happy pills over the past year but they make little difference. I've had a crap couple of years but know I will get through it.

However, I believe my main problem is lack of sleep (at the right time). It's a major problem I've had for years and years and I think it catches up with you and wears you down. Could that be an issue with you?

As I say, keep going. It's not unique, so you're not a freak or anything. Small steps. Change in habits. And the alternative is way way worse. That's how I know I'll pull through it and hope you do too. :-)

[Tony125]

Not normal, sounds like low testosterone level but could also be from Thyroid condition. Also as we age the body doesn't utilise vitamins as well so should take multi vitamin suppliment as well as extra strength B complex to increase energy and if in England not Thailand Vitamin D =(Sunshine vitamin)

You have to make a change sitting typing about it will accomplish nothing need to try everything you can to overcome the feelings.

[Holiday Kojak]

Since I turned 60 and retired in Thailand I'm full of enthusiasm, I get exited about everything, I do lots of things I didn't use to do before and even if I can't complete what I'm doing I give it a go and put my best effort.

I go to bed at 10 in the night wake up at 6:00 in the morning to appreciate the beautiful sunrise and the morning breeze.

I do laugh a lot and when others are miserable around me I make them laugh also.

Have blood test every 6 months and every time the doctor gives me the same answer.

You will live.

No, what you got is not normal process of ageing, it's yourself.

Change your diet, change your habits, change the way you are living

Fight it man.

60 you are still young, enjoy the many years you have still to come.

Never surrender.

And sometimes go and find a young lady and have a nice time with her.

It works miracles.

Careful your wife doesn't know, because you will not go of old age.

Great advice Costas, I think the secret is as we know it as Kefi................here is a great link to understanding what Greeks refer to as a passion for life. http://www.lemonandolives.com/meaning-of-kefi/

[kalama]

Buea ?

I am close to 70 , back home after 20 years in Thailand . Well , in general things are better organized here but still I miss the country and of course the people for whom the GNS ( Gross National Sabai) is more important than the GNP . It is this aspect of which Farangs can get a lot from the Thais : learn to listen more to the heart . I am quite sure that ( not only but especially those of ) the TV members who have read and understood the most beautiful introduction to Thai culture 'Entering the Thai Heart' , first published by Bangkok Post 1983 , will agree.

What I like to say is : you will not be bored with your retired life when you manage to be more be open and try to get a feeling of your (social) environment. Try to 'catch' the level of sabai which is expressed in so many different ways and often reminds on shadow puppetry.

Feeling Sabai supports as well a state of mind which allows to study what is basically the philosophy,psychology and religion of the country : Buddhism. It is a treasure to discover and a real challenge for the mind . No need to give up your traditional faith but learn from the wisdom, freely available.

[nithisa78]

I'm not sure, Sir.

You sound like good man. Perhaps these are just growing pains. The suffering is optional and usually unnecessary.

If you wish to reply to me privately, perhaps I may be of some help.

Take care of yourself. God is there. Listen, you will hear him. It is love song. Just love.

[Tony125]

http://healthyliving.msn.com/health-wellness/15-instant-ways-to-make-yourself-happier

Mens health 15 ways to be happier

[Tony125]

http://www.sharecare.com/health/anti-aging-skin-care/article/a-purpose-in-life-protects?eid=1010717643&memberid=52606841&_sid=1da459c9-4cea-4906-8770-abece9583b43cmpid=sceml00

Health News

[crazyfalang]

Have you blood tested for Testosterone level. It should be between 700-1100. If it isn't then you can have injections (women have tablets) to perk you up. As you get over 40 the levels drop.

[manarak]

check thyroid function

[super22k]

Try affirmations.Say seven times a day,"I AM FULL OF LIFE AND BURSTING WITH ENERGY". Say it with strength and passion and you will get more energy.You are telling your subconcious mind what you want and it will make sure you get it eventualy.Even by saying this affirmation once gives me a lift.

[Wat dee]

Mate (OP), I have led a fairly active life, one way or another , as an older guy than you I am now in a similar position, the adventure has gone, though I have found a couple of things that interest me. When I look at stuff I am very similar to my parents as they aged, meaning perhaps stuff changes as we get older, the way we look at things.

For me friendship is a big plus, but alas hard to find cos folk have their idea in older life and for sure friendship ain't one for many, just their wee world that "age" has brought them. Sorry, difficult to put into words...

I do still have adventures. I take my wife lots of places in Thailand. The bummer is though, that when we go somewhere I'd have been enthralled with 10 years ago, I'm thinking ho hum. That's what I mean about lacking enthusiasm. I just don't get a buzz out of life anymore, which really is a shame.

I went to Penang on a visa run a while back, but when I got there I was so unenthusiastic I cut my planned week there to 2 days and came back home to watch rubbish on tv instead.

thaibeachlovers, maybe you need adventures without the Mrs?

[Wat dee]

Try affirmations.Say seven times a day,"I AM FULL OF LIFE AND BURSTING WITH ENERGY". Say it with strength and passion and you will get more energy.You are telling your subconcious mind what you want and it will make sure you get it eventualy.Even by saying this affirmation once gives me a lift.

Blend works better!

[mrfaroukh]

I still have few years to go to become 60. Never had any problem and hopefully will not have. I travel a lot, and that I really mean it, at least visit 2 new countries every year beside visiting others I already been. I never sleep before 3 Am, sometimes may be if I am too tired. Do many different sport during a day. Never smoke and drink just enough with friends. Help myself with good diet food and junk food once in a while.

Push yourself to go to gym, walk next to the beach and look at all the beautiful people around you. Think only positive and that is the solution. Yoga and breathing system will really help you to get energy. If you can go to some kind of health hospital and detox completely.

Good luck

[RoyLee]

Regular vigorous exercise. Best cure for mild depression and also the best anti-aging medicine in the world! Oh and cut back on sugar.