Is Thailand friendly?

[Eliot Rosewater]

I really fail to see why I must nod or communicate with the white man who passes me, he could be German, French, Swiss , Italian, its almost as though we are some sort of Farang clan.

I speak none of the above languages and I dont talk to strangers.

I nod at anyone of any race I come into eye contact with; why? Because I'm not a rude prick Edited September 30, 2014 by Eliot Rosewater

[AnotherOneAmerican]

I really fail to see why I must nod or communicate with the white man who passes me, he could be German, French, Swiss , Italian, its almost as though we are some sort of Farang clan.

I speak none of the above languages and I dont talk to strangers.

I nod at anyone of any race I come into eye contact with; why? Because I'm not a rude prick

But you are a self admitted racist.

[ableguy]

tend to agree, about the ex pats that have been living here for many years, kind of snobbish and look away or dont take you on when you say hello, they think because they´ve lived in their small world here for years that theyre better than you, or maybe think you are competition as they have their usual bar fines , and believe they own them ....yet are cheap charlies who wont take care of the girls properly.Not very welcoming.. .There is also many here who are a complete embarrasement to themselves, i think have left their own country for their own good or safety, cos i know if they behaved the way they do back home, theyd get a serious doing...... There is many ex-pats here that are completely the opposite, have been welcoming , and very helpful since i arrived, real salt of the earth people...have made me fit in so easy here...Also most of the Thai´s i encounter are friendly, welcoming , polite..but also the fake smile lot, who try be your friend because they think they can get something from you...hangers ons, scroungers... I´ve also noticed a lot of the younger generation hanging about now, very rude, arrogant, trying their best to get attention , antagonise people... full of ice or alcohol... great for the future of thailand

We hangout in very different places. I would say that we hangout in different countries

I have been here for years. Don't frequent places you allude to, and at least give a nod to the rare foreigner I happen to see.

Perhaps you might consider picking places other than Pattaya Patong etc to visit.

good for you..this is the kind of snobbish attitude im on about, and because you´ve been there for years you are an expert?? you have lived everywhere in thailand?? you admit, to rarely seeing a foreigner, so you´re not really that qualified to comment are you?? and for your information, i dont live in either Patong or Pattaya.. i prefer a quieter life style away from all the 24/7 party animals...

555 I think you need to go back and read your post but yeah..

Living here for years does make me an expert. Having lived in all 4 language zones of Thailand does as well. Not having thought about hookers in years..... Well make of that what you will.

Old and no power????

Do you always act so rude ?

[louse1953]

How is it possible to be friends with people you have absolutely nothing in common with. Those who claim to have good Thai friends are simply deluded. Only when the money runs out will they see how quick so called friends disappear. To the Thais who have money a farang is just a token to gain status. In general , your money is welcome , you are tolerated.

Absolute codswallop.We are all human,thats enough in common for me.I dont flash the cash and still have friends.I dont think i am a status symbol as i am a singlet wearing,board short type of bloke.You can hang with me nana,as i am sure to raise your profile,admittedly from a very low base.

[Brizzy]

Friends in Thai culture and friends in Western culture are completely different entities.

Most Westerners won't understand the concept of this, and the Thai friends that they have will keep on smiling.

[krabimike]

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How is it possible to be friends with people you have absolutely nothing in common with. Those who claim to have good Thai friends are simply deluded. Only when the money runs out will they see how quick so called friends disappear. To the Thais who have money a farang is just a token to gain status. In general , your money is welcome , you are tolerated.

That's a very bitter viewpoint. I have many things in common with my colleagues and my neighbors and my partner.

It is silly to think that a farang adds status.

I find that the Thais with money only treat you friendly if there is status to be gained other then that they are annoyed and not interested in the language or cultural difficulties. they are a very selfish and self centered people (just watch them open a door for you or try to cross at a cross walk or drive with them.) On the norm Thais believe they are Superior. as they do not have the capability to admit that there country is pretty much ass back wards 25 years behind and contributes very little to the worlds seen.

Yet another bitter response that has little to do with reality.

Perhaps it is just me. I speak and read Thai. No deep language or cultural issues. My Thai friends speak and read English. No deep language or cultural issues.

Your other complaints seem both petty and issues with Thai culture.

I speak read and write thai also. Nothing is a 100% but in general this is how I see it. Yes culture has everything to do with it and I don't see it as petty.
ผมพูดอ่านและเขียนภาษาไทยได้ด้วยเหมือนกัน ไม่มีอะไร 100% แต่โดยทั่วไปผมเห็นว่ามันเป็นอย่างไร ใช่ผมเห็นว่าวัฒนธรรมสำคัญไม่ได้เห็นว่ามันไม่สำคัญ

[jdinasia]

How is it possible to be friends with people you have absolutely nothing in common with. Those who claim to have good Thai friends are simply deluded. Only when the money runs out will they see how quick so called friends disappear. To the Thais who have money a farang is just a token to gain status. In general , your money is welcome , you are tolerated.

That's a very bitter viewpoint. I have many things in common with my colleagues and my neighbors and my partner.

It is silly to think that a farang adds status.

I find that the Thais with money only treat you friendly if there is status to be gained other then that they are annoyed and not interested in the language or cultural difficulties. they are a very selfish and self centered people (just watch them open a door for you or try to cross at a cross walk or drive with them.) On the norm Thais believe they are Superior. as they do not have the capability to admit that there country is pretty much ass back wards 25 years behind and contributes very little to the worlds seen.

Yet another bitter response that has little to do with reality.

Perhaps it is just me. I speak and read Thai. No deep language or cultural issues. My Thai friends speak and read English. No deep language or cultural issues.

Your other complaints seem both petty and issues with Thai culture.

I speak read and write thai also. Nothing is a 100% but in general this is how I see it. Yes culture has everything to do with it and I don't see it as petty.

ผมพูดอ่านและเขียนภาษาไทยได้ด้วยเหมือนกัน ไม่มีอะไร 100% แต่โดยทั่วไปผมเห็นว่ามันเป็นอย่างไร ใช่ผมเห็นว่าวัฒนธรรมสำคัญไม่ได้เห็นว่ามันไม่สำคัญ

Pardon. But I barely understand your English... I doubt that most would understand your Thai.

[Ashto]

Re jdinasia's use of a little Thai writing I copied it into my nifty ITranslate app and this is what I got : I speak, read and write English in Thailand with the same, nothing is 100%, but in general I think it is. Yes, I see that culture does not matter that it does not matter.

Nice touch using a bit of Thai on the forum. Incidentally, I find when I use the app that it's best to translate the English into Thai then translate the Thai back into English to see if it means the same before serving it up,to a Thai. The structures of the two languages seem to be so different that the way the English sentence is structured matters a lot in terms of how it works in Thai. I can see that if I set about learning Thai starting by understanding the structure of Thai sentences would be good to get on board early.

On the subject of the thread, I've had pretty well,all,the experiences both good and bad described by contributors and have concluded that there all sorts of people in Thailand as there are in NZ where I come from. But I find that Thais are generally quick to engage, especially in a fun interaction, even with a stranger like me and even in the street.

Thais I've spent more time with strike me as surprisingly like ordinary NZers, big differences of course (why else would you come to ASIA if not to experience another culture?) but lots in common too.

[NeverSure]

I have always found my neighbours both in Bangkok and in Eastern Thailand to be very friendly. Ni complaints fro me on that. Of course other tourist spots it always feels different. I do find from my travels, The US to be one of the friendliest places to be fair and as I am on another trip at present, again always a very friendly and polite country.

Thank you.

[jdinasia]

Ashto.. Wasn't my use if Thai. Against forum rules so I only use it in the Thai language section.

[benalibina]

I stated before and some get it, Thai trust no one but family!

Yes, that is exactly why bad education and lack of critical thinking is a true downer amongst the poor rural class. There is often a big manipulator in the family who they listen to.

Thats why this will not easily happen.

[arnestockholm]

From my experience in my last two years in Thailand. They look friendly but are not as friendly as they look. The land of smile does only exist in our imagination. In two years I don't can build up a real friendship. Most contacts are only friendly to you as long as they have any kind of benefit, job, money, can buy your old stuff cheap etc... First I thought I am doing something wrong or its a personal failure of me. But now living since 6 month in Singapore I can say it seems not to be my failure. Have already found some people here that I am sure it will come out as new friends. Yes people here don't smile this much but when they do its real. That's only my experience maybe I met the wrong people in Thailand.

[aTomsLife]

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Yet another bitter response that has little to do with reality.

Perhaps it is just me. I speak and read Thai. No deep language or cultural issues. My Thai friends speak and read English. No deep language or cultural issues.

Your other complaints seem both petty and issues with Thai culture.

I speak read and write thai also. Nothing is a 100% but in general this is how I see it. Yes culture has everything to do with it and I don't see it as petty.

ผมพูดอ่านและเขียนภาษาไทยได้ด้วยเหมือนกัน ไม่มีอะไร 100% แต่โดยทั่วไปผมเห็นว่ามันเป็นอย่างไร ใช่ผมเห็นว่าวัฒนธรรมสำคัญไม่ได้เห็นว่ามันไม่สำคัญ

You structure Thai as though it's English. It's not.

[jdinasia]

Yet another bitter response that has little to do with reality.

Perhaps it is just me. I speak and read Thai. No deep language or cultural issues. My Thai friends speak and read English. No deep language or cultural issues.

Your other complaints seem both petty and issues with Thai culture.

I speak read and write thai also. Nothing is a 100% but in general this is how I see it. Yes culture has everything to do with it and I don't see it as petty.

ผมพูดอ่านและเขียนภาษาไทยได้ด้วยเหมือนกัน ไม่มีอะไร 100% แต่โดยทั่วไปผมเห็นว่ามันเป็นอย่างไร ใช่ผมเห็นว่าวัฒนธรรมสำคัญไม่ได้เห็นว่ามันไม่สำคัญ

You structure Thai as though it's English. It's not.

I assume he used word for word translation. This isn't the section for Thai language though.

[aTomsLife]

Yet another bitter response that has little to do with reality.

Perhaps it is just me. I speak and read Thai. No deep language or cultural issues. My Thai friends speak and read English. No deep language or cultural issues.

Your other complaints seem both petty and issues with Thai culture.

I speak read and write thai also. Nothing is a 100% but in general this is how I see it. Yes culture has everything to do with it and I don't see it as petty.

ผมพูดอ่านและเขียนภาษาไทยได้ด้วยเหมือนกัน ไม่มีอะไร 100% แต่โดยทั่วไปผมเห็นว่ามันเป็นอย่างไร ใช่ผมเห็นว่าวัฒนธรรมสำคัญไม่ได้เห็นว่ามันไม่สำคัญ

You structure Thai as though it's English. It's not.

I assume he used word for word translation. This isn't the section for Thai language though.

My observation of his Thai proficiency speaks to credibility: he doesn't have the command of the language he thinks he does, which calls into question what he thinks he understands about the culture he's commenting on.

Edit: on that note, his English isn't all that clear either.

Edited September 30, 2014 by aTomsLife

[MJP]

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How is it possible to be friends with people you have absolutely nothing in common with. Those who claim to have good Thai friends are simply deluded. Only when the money runs out will they see how quick so called friends disappear. To the Thais who have money a farang is just a token to gain status. In general , your money is welcome , you are tolerated.

That's a very bitter viewpoint. I have many things in common with my colleagues and my neighbors and my partner.

It is silly to think that a farang adds status.

I find that the Thais with money only treat you friendly if there is status to be gained other then that they are annoyed and not interested in the language or cultural difficulties. they are a very selfish and self centered people (just watch them open a door for you or try to cross at a cross walk or drive with them.) On the norm Thais believe they are Superior. as they do not have the capability to admit that there country is pretty much ass back wards 25 years behind and contributes very little to the worlds seen.

25 years is a little generous. Remember that's 1989. I don't remember old Blighty being backward in 1989.

I think you mean 1898.

[TheSpade]

Thailand is a very polite country and most people are very helpful and service is without doubt extremely good

On the whole I find Thai's polite but helpful? No I wouldn't say so really. Sure if you ask for help someone might but no one is out of their way helpful like I've experienced in other countries as a stranger who needs help.

For example a Thai would pretty much never approach an obviously lost tourist in the street and ask if they needed help which is something I've experienced in many other countries across the globe and even do myself at home when I see lost tourists.

And service 'extremely good'....no not at all. The opposite. Dreadful outside of high end hotels and resorts.

There's no such thing as customer service in Thailand. The customer is NOT always right. People don't stop to think about what the customer wants or how to make it a good experience for them.

From the 7/11 to the local restaurants to bars to shopping malls and beyond....staff are underpaid, under trained and uninterested.

Thailand (well Bangkok anyway) seems to be full of lonely people who don't have many or any real friends.

I think maybe a lot of it comes down to people moving from the provinces to the city for study or work and leaving their friends behind and not really being able to make new ones other than some work or university colleagues who don't see each other as real friends.

So many Thai's I know spend so much of their free time doing nothing - sitting at home in their tiny box room surfing the net, watching TV and playing silly games on their smart phones.

[TheSpade]

Those who claim to have good Thai friends are simply deluded. Only when the money runs out will they see how quick so called friends disappear. To the Thais who have money a farang is just a token to gain status. In general , your money is welcome , you are tolerated.

Then why do the Thai's I know always split the bill with me on everything? I've never offered to pay and never been asked to. We are friends. Friends don't take advantage of people.

I don't have a lot of Thai friends but the ones I do have treat me much like a friend from any country / back home would. There's no taking advantage of or special treatment. I don't get paraded around as a 'status' symbol either and tbh being friends with a farang isn't much of a status thing in Thailand anyway.

We have a bad reputation on the whole not a good one.

[buhi]

Thank you all, for me the lesson is ended, carry on and discuss.

[JLCrab]

From Post #78 above: We have a bad reputation on the whole not a good one.

Maybe yes; maybe no ... but I found a large measure as to how you are viewed as an individual while/st in Thailand comes from your answer to a Thai person's questioning: So, what do you actually DO while you are in Thailand?

Edited September 30, 2014 by JLCrab

[malt25]

How is it possible to be friends with people you have absolutely nothing in common with. Those who claim to have good Thai friends are simply deluded. Only when the money runs out will they see how quick so called friends disappear. To the Thais who have money a farang is just a token to gain status. In general , your money is welcome , you are tolerated.

Me thinks you should either wake from your bad dream or have a think about what a friend is. Maybe your opinion & attitude are somewhat derived from your own personality & attitude toward others. Did you have foreign friends back in your homeland....... I very much doubt it.

Cheers & a great day to all..... Mal.

[NanLaew]

Here is a day in the life. I came from the U.S. in a state not known to be friendly. I go back to visit every year.

Day 1: stranger lady with kids makes a joke to me while we wait in line at Toys 'R Us. See her again in another store, we continue to talk.

Day 2: strangers all talk and laugh in line at Home Depot.

Day 3: strangers talk to me while waiting in line for the elevator.

Back to Thailand:....9 years and not a word or acknowledgement of my existence (bar crowd not included).

A Thai will strike up a conversation with Thai stranger in a market or waiting for a bus or buying lunch from a vendors cart.

A Thai will not strike up a conversation with a Thai stranger while cruising the aisles of Emporium, waiting for the MRT or dining in a restaurant.

A Thai won't strike up a conversation with a foreign stranger who very probably doesn't speak Thai anyway.

[Eliot Rosewater]

I really fail to see why I must nod or communicate with the white man who passes me, he could be German, French, Swiss , Italian, its almost as though we are some sort of Farang clan.

I speak none of the above languages and I dont talk to strangers.

I nod at anyone of any race I come into eye contact with; why? Because I'm not a rude prick

But you are a self admitted racist.

What on earth are you talking about???

[jacky54]

'Thailand is a very polite country and most people are very helpful and service is without doubt extremely good.'

The OP must never have tried to get on a bus or get a refund then! However, Thais are far, far friendlier than expats, most of them will try not to say hello even and they all look pretty miserable, especially when being dragged around Big C or Tesco by their Thai women.

[RickyJB]

Here is a day in the life. I came from the U.S. in a state not known to be friendly. I go back to visit every year.

Day 1: stranger lady with kids makes a joke to me while we wait in line at Toys 'R Us. See her again in another store, we continue to talk.

Day 2: strangers all talk and laugh in line at Home Depot.

Day 3: strangers talk to me while waiting in line for the elevator.

Back to Thailand:....9 years and not a word or acknowledgement of my existence (bar crowd not included).

I see it in a similar way, but cannot agree with your last sentense whoever you mean, expats or Thais.

The friendliest, politest, most openminded folks i met in Mexico, NewZealand, South Africa, Namibia and Malaysia. Americans are a nice bunch as well as long as they dont work for the government or the mafia.

Namibia i totally agree with, such polite people that cant do enough for you, look forward to going back one day...even walking down a street late at night , ive had people walk by and say hello, ask if im lost etc... wonderful country, great people ..and price of a pint very nice too ;-)

[AnotherOneAmerican]

I really fail to see why I must nod or communicate with the white man who passes me, he could be German, French, Swiss , Italian, its almost as though we are some sort of Farang clan.

I speak none of the above languages and I dont talk to strangers.

I nod at anyone of any race I come into eye contact with; why? Because I'm not a rude prick

But you are a self admitted racist.

What on earth are you talking about???

Yeh, sorry Eliot, quoted wrong post, senior moment, totally my bad, apologies.

[phanangpete]

OP, Thais are as friendly and polite as you are to them.

You don't seem to be interested to get closer to them, just keep them on a distance.

So you will never know about them but always be polite to them, smile to them and may be sometimes wai at them.

This is not how it works, you are not integrating to the society you live in, you just accept them.

Also, I think you are following the western culture that people have been living for years and years as neighbours and the only words they have exchanged between them is a Good Morning or a polite Hello.

Try to get closer to the Thais, you will be accepted by them with open hands and minds and then you will understand the difference of just being polite and making friends.

But be genuine, you can't fool them and they can't fool you.

Now, maybe you are not at all interested to get closer to them, so please disregard my post as a waste of time.

Costas, I think you missed my point.

I am very "friendly" with my neighbours, socialise daily with them.

BUT and here, maybe as a Greek, you may know; blood is thicker than water.

When I was in the UK, millions of years ago, it was inportant to make friends, invite them to dinner, socialise with them and even put friends before family.

Not here and I like it.

Yes agree totally Costas but buhi you have lived amongst them many years now and this is the situation you find yourself in.

This is quite normal for this Country, if they are from the country maybe up North they will not be into socializing especially with foreigners ,some are even confused as to why we are here and married to one, that applies alot to the oldies im afraid.

Do you want to hang out with them, when quite obviously they dont want to with us, leave it and just carry on being polite.

[thongsuknork]

How u behave with friends reflects you if u r friendly every one becomes friendly if u invite some body they will surely invite you back

yes Thai people are very friendly no doubt about it

[jdinasia]

Extremely bitter. But since that isn't my experience nor that of anyone else I personally know in Thailand..

And unlike you I do have many things in common with my Thai friends partner family and colleagues..I think I will write your experiences off to the vagaries of your personality.

[claffey]

How is it possible to be friends with people you have absolutely nothing in common with. Those who claim to have good Thai friends are simply deluded. Only when the money runs out will they see how quick so called friends disappear. To the Thais who have money a farang is just a token to gain status. In general , your money is welcome , you are tolerated.

I have Thai friends. I've never given them money nor would they ask for it!! I have friends from around the world.No ones ever asked me for money! I don't have any, anyway!! Why can't I have something in common with Thai people? We're both human. Maybe they like similar sports, food etc...You are a tool! Perhaps you've been stung too many times due to your own naivety????