Farang/baksida

[sbk]

We once got a wedding invitation addressed to my husband and his farang wife. . Needless to say, we didn't attend this wedding.

If I can be really bothered then maybe just throw a joke at them for saying it (or more likely a joke to their friends about the guy who said it), always in polite Thai of course. End result, they lose face, you gain some.

Nope, it was written on the envelope! If, after I have been living in the same place for 17 years, they can't even show enough respect to find out my name, there is really no point in going!

[Thaipwriter]

If someone takes the time to speak Lao with me by calling me Bak sida I repay the complement by calling them Bak Lao.

Bet they love that!

[chonabot]

When some <deleted> shouted out 'baksida' when I entered a shop today in the middle of Khon Kaen City so as to somehow impress his chums, I couldn't hold back and shouted out 'bak haam noi'. This reverses the impression on his friends makes him look like an idiot. 'Bak haam noi' means something like little boy and is as impolite as him saying baksida.

Nice one!

I was in Rimpao Hotel Karaoke lounge ( Kalasin ) a year ago , I was singled out as the lone farang and a few jokes were made. When the resident musical duo asked for my name ,I replied " David Beckham!" Everyone clapped and laughed , until he came back with " I think you are David Bok-Ham! "

Never trade inults with someone who has a Mike and PA system behind them...

[chonabot]

When people stare or say things which I find offensive (even if it's not meant to be offensive), I simply walk away from them and pay no attention to them. I would never reinforce this type of behavior by saying anything or giving them the slightest attention. I don't even look at them.

How would you react if the insult was directed towards your wife, in your home country, would you still walk on by, trying desperately not to make eye contact with the loudmouth knobs?

I prefer to respond to the confrontation , I would feel less than a man if I walked away from an insult to me or my family.

Each to his own I guess.

Edited July 26, 2006 by chonabot

[mrbojangles]

When people stare or say things which I find offensive (even if it's not meant to be offensive), I simply walk away from them and pay no attention to them. I would never reinforce this type of behavior by saying anything or giving them the slightest attention. I don't even look at them.

How would you react if the insult was directed towards your wife, in your home country, would you still walk on by, trying desperately not to make eye contact with the loudmouth knobs?

Good point Chon. Somebody in my local called my mrs a "chinc" (fortunatley she wasn't present) about 6 months ago. The stupid ignoramous. A very heated discussion followed and he apologised and said he didn't mean to offend!! Jerk off

[Neeranam]

So in short.. I was a little mistaken with the use of buksida... but I still wouldn't find it offensive.

I think most people are confused, thinking it is OK.

Strangley, I can't remember anyone saying this when my wife is with me. Actually it doesn't happen very often, but when it does I always say sopmething.

Thanks for the replies - some good ones. I can't understand the thought to say nothing, or just smile.

I guess I'll always be outnumbered by the smiley, "I'm a baksida and want to buy you all a beer and take all your family to Tesco Lotus" brigade.

[BambinA]

Thinking as a TH .. farang or buk sida is ok..no insult

But ..if i were in farangland, and somebody called me "banana" ,I'd be upset..and i would poke a banana in somebody's arse.

(Banana -Gluay , Gluay Horm ...G , if u guy pronouce with K , it will be a D-CK)

[splitlid]

Thinking as a TH .. farang or buk sida is ok..no insult

But ..if i were in farangland, and somebody called me "banana" ,I'd be upset..and i would poke a banana in somebody's arse.

(Banana -Gluay , Gluay Horm ...G , if u guy pronouce with K , it will be a D-CK)

banana banana banana banana...............

splitlit undoes his belt,lets his trousers fall to the floor........

bends slightly and with a wry smile on his face.... braces for impact....

[Arsenal]

If someone takes the time to speak Lao with me by calling me Bak sida I repay the complement by calling them Bak Lao.

But your riposte is more offensive given patronising comments sometimes made by Bangkok types about Isaan types.Best course is to smile and say nothing.

[skippybangkok]

Walking across a road in BKK and there were alot of Taxi drivers. One called out and pointed " Baksida ", I pointed back " Bak Ham Noi" ( Litterally " Little Dick" = often used as a cute word to address boys i.e. little willy ).

The taxi guys standing around burst out in laughter, and he transformed him self from a smart ass into an idot in an instant. Took him totally by surprise and he was gob smacked....totally lost ...stood there in a daze

Well recommended.

Edited July 27, 2006 by skippybangkok

[Arsenal]

Walking across a road in BKK and there were alot of Taxi drivers. One called out and pointed " Baksida ", I pointed back " Bak Ham Noi" ( Litterally " Little Dick" = often used as a cute word to address boys i.e. little willy ).

The taxi guys standing around burst out in laughter, and he transformed him self from a smart ass into an idot in an instant. Took him totally by surprise and he was gob smacked....totally lost ...stood there in a daze

Well recommended.

Well recommended by whom? The self congratulatory tone is wholly inappropriate.You may have got a laugh out of this set of taxi drivers with your bargirl slang but you clearly have no idea of how to behave in Thailand.

[Totster]

Walking across a road in BKK and there were alot of Taxi drivers. One called out and pointed " Baksida ", I pointed back " Bak Ham Noi" ( Litterally " Little Dick" = often used as a cute word to address boys i.e. little willy ).

The taxi guys standing around burst out in laughter, and he transformed him self from a smart ass into an idot in an instant. Took him totally by surprise and he was gob smacked....totally lost ...stood there in a daze

Well recommended.

Well recommended by whom? The self congratulatory tone is wholly inappropriate.You may have got a laugh out of this set of taxi drivers with your bargirl slang but you clearly have no idea of how to behave in Thailand.

Hmmm.. methinks Arsenal is a bak ham yai !

The Isaan Lao language can hardly be referred to as bargirl slang..

totster

Edited July 27, 2006 by Totster

[Arsenal]

Walking across a road in BKK and there were alot of Taxi drivers. One called out and pointed " Baksida ", I pointed back " Bak Ham Noi" ( Litterally " Little Dick" = often used as a cute word to address boys i.e. little willy ).

The taxi guys standing around burst out in laughter, and he transformed him self from a smart ass into an idot in an instant. Took him totally by surprise and he was gob smacked....totally lost ...stood there in a daze

Well recommended.

Well recommended by whom? The self congratulatory tone is wholly inappropriate.You may have got a laugh out of this set of taxi drivers with your bargirl slang but you clearly have no idea of how to behave in Thailand.

Hmmm.. methinks Arsenal is a bak ham yai !

The Isaan Lao language can hardly be referred to as bargirl slang..

totster

Agreed but down market farangs usually learn it in bars.

[Totster]

Agreed but down market farangs usually learn it in bars.

An ambiguous reply..

totster

[Neeranam]

Walking across a road in BKK and there were alot of Taxi drivers. One called out and pointed " Baksida ", I pointed back " Bak Ham Noi" ( Litterally " Little Dick" = often used as a cute word to address boys i.e. little willy ).

The taxi guys standing around burst out in laughter, and he transformed him self from a smart ass into an idot in an instant. Took him totally by surprise and he was gob smacked....totally lost ...stood there in a daze

Well recommended.

Well recommended by whom? The self congratulatory tone is wholly inappropriate.You may have got a laugh out of this set of taxi drivers with your bargirl slang but you clearly have no idea of how to behave in Thailand.

<deleted>? Are you an English aristocrat? or are you the football wearing English hooligan in Pattaya?

Agreed but down market farangs usually learn it in bars.

Some upmarket forieners learn in it Isarn -so I hear.

Edited July 27, 2006 by Neeranam

[chonabot]

Off topic to my old mate Neeranam , but on-topic in an amazing off the cuff way.....

After reading and replying to this interesting thread about 12 hours earlier...

I joined my wife and 2 sons for a game of tennis in the local park.

After about an hour, my wife and youngest son ( 31 and 8 respective ) ambled off to get some cold drinks from the local chip shop. My youngest was videoing the whole event from my wife's phone.

After a few minutes he came screaming back towards me. Shouting " Dad! Dad! Mum's in trouble ! "

I put the racquet down and sprinted towards him, my stepson (15) reticent to join the melee'.

Basically my wife was shouting against a bunch of youths, 2 girls and six young men , between the ages of 15 and 18. In the chip shop , apparently one of the kids had started taking the rise out my 8 year old for videoing my wife queueing up for chips. My wife had told my youngest to stop the shennagigans, on the way out of the shop, the same youth called my wife a chinky bitch.

I had reached the pinnacle of this eruption and was amidst lots of shouting, I almost laughed at the irony of my earlier comment in this thread. The youth who was accused of the bad behaviour was a large young lad , about 4 inches taller than me. He denied the insult , my wife assured me that he had said this word, his mates were milling between us. Something in his eye and the way he moved towards me put me at unease.

I reacted by a quick sweep of his legs and this took him to the floor , I also gave him a light slap in the face on the way down. All of his mates shut up , and we walked back to the courts.

After the tennis was finished I took time to examine the phone's video files and realised that the whole insult episode was caught on camera ( I will email the scene to any doubters.. )

Please tell me I am wrong to react the way I did ?

Also I am worried the way that my eldest stayed clear of the action in a way that brought memories of Kenny Everett to me...

It is not nice to call people names. regardless of country or origin , I will never accept this, I will never walk away.

Edited July 27, 2006 by chonabot

[Sing_Sling]

I can't realy understand this topic.

On the one hand we can't try to be educators in good manners and etiquette on how to address other people.

On the other we are told by some that we have to take any 'insults' or innuendo as we are in their country.

The double standards come in when we turn the situation around and place ouselves in the position of being the insultors and having Thais called 'bananas', 'chinks', 'slopes' etc by Aussie, Brit etc . . . taxi drivers or whoever.

Is it that awful to admit that some things Caucasians are called, and it is accepted by locals, may not be polite or nice?

(Chonabot - how awful of you to react like that. This is their country and if you don't like the way you are treated then bugger off back home . . . (and your eldest needs a slight slap for not coming to your wife's aid))

Edited July 27, 2006 by Sing_Sling

[chonabot]

I can't realy understand this topic.

On the one hand we can't try to be educators in good manners and etiquette on how to address other people.

On the other we are told by some that we have to take any 'insults' or innuendo as we are in their country.

The double standards come in when we turn the situation around and place ouselves in the position of being the insultors and having Thais called 'bananas', 'chinks', 'slopes' etc by Aussie, Brit etc . . . taxi drivers or whoever.

Is it that awful to admit that some things Caucasians are called, and it is accepted by locals, may not be polite or nice?

(Chonabot - how awful of you to react like that. This is their country and if you don't like the way you are treated then bugger off back home . . . (and your eldest needs a slight slap for not coming to your wife's aid))

Even more amusing , this was in OXford, I wish I could bugger off to Muang Thai.....

[Sing_Sling]

Hahahaha - if it was in Oxford then you reacted correctly - got to teach those obnoxious whte boys a lesson . . . Mind your manners, however, when you get back to Thailand . . . (and you ruined an easy riposte )

(When will you be back in TH?)

[tourleadersi]

So in short.. I was a little mistaken with the use of buksida... but I still wouldn't find it offensive.

I think most people are confused, thinking it is OK.

Strangley, I can't remember anyone saying this when my wife is with me. Actually it doesn't happen very often, but when it does I always say sopmething.

Thanks for the replies - some good ones. I can't understand the thought to say nothing, or just smile.

I guess I'll always be outnumbered by the smiley, "I'm a baksida and want to buy you all a beer and take all your family to Tesco Lotus" brigade.

Neeranam. I can understand your desire to get stuck in when someone is rude but I guess most here would rather let it wash off them then cause a confrontation that could escalate out of control. This doesn't mean we will laugh at ourselves and then go and buy them all a beer and take their family to Tesco's, merely that there is a time to fight and a time to just let it go. Honestly if I had responded with a retort everytime someone has given me flak I would not be here to write this now.

My wise chinese martial arts teacher used to have two favorite sayings: "Better to swallow pride than blood" and "The best defence is to not be there". The one time he could do neither I saw him take down 5 men in a nightclub in Leeds. One day my friend someone will bite at your retort and may just come back with another verbal offering or they may feel the need to regain face by opening up a can of whoopass on you. I used to do security work in Leeds, and I also have seen what happens when Thais fight. Give me UK brawls any day, out here it ain't pretty.

[tourleadersi]

Off topic to my old mate Neeranam , but on-topic in an amazing off the cuff way.....

After reading and replying to this interesting thread about 12 hours earlier...

I joined my wife and 2 sons for a game of tennis in the local park.

After about an hour, my wife and youngest son ( 31 and 8 respective ) ambled off to get some cold drinks from the local chip shop. My youngest was videoing the whole event from my wife's phone.

After a few minutes he came screaming back towards me. Shouting " Dad! Dad! Mum's in trouble ! "

I put the racquet down and sprinted towards him, my stepson (15) reticent to join the melee'.

Basically my wife was shouting against a bunch of youths, 2 girls and six young men , between the ages of 15 and 18. In the chip shop , apparently one of the kids had started taking the rise out my 8 year old for videoing my wife queueing up for chips. My wife had told my youngest to stop the shennagigans, on the way out of the shop, the same youth called my wife a chinky bitch.

I had reached the pinnacle of this eruption and was amidst lots of shouting, I almost laughed at the irony of my earlier comment in this thread. The youth who was accused of the bad behaviour was a large young lad , about 4 inches taller than me. He denied the insult , my wife assured me that he had said this word, his mates were milling between us. Something in his eye and the way he moved towards me put me at unease.

I reacted by a quick sweep of his legs and this took him to the floor , I also gave him a light slap in the face on the way down. All of his mates shut up , and we walked back to the courts.

After the tennis was finished I took time to examine the phone's video files and realised that the whole insult episode was caught on camera ( I will email the scene to any doubters.. )

Please tell me I am wrong to react the way I did ?

Also I am worried the way that my eldest stayed clear of the action in a way that brought memories of Kenny Everett to me...

It is not nice to call people names. regardless of country or origin , I will never accept this, I will never walk away.

Further to my last posting where I advised Neeranam to advoid confrontation for fear of taking a whipping, I would like to add that there is a time to fight. Chon my friend, you met that time and dealt with it very well. Hats off to you.

Often backing down is mistaken for cowardice, I don't believe it is unless you really should stand your ground. You taught them an important lesson there and protected your family. You da man!

[camerata]

Please tell me I am wrong to react the way I did ?

Also I am worried the way that my eldest stayed clear of the action in a way that brought memories of Kenny Everett to me...

It is not nice to call people names. regardless of country or origin , I will never accept this, I will never walk away.

But how would you feel if some of these bozos had pulled a knife and your wife got stabbed to death in the melee? That's what I'd be worried about. You can never tell where violence will end.

[Neeranam]

Please tell me I am wrong to react the way I did ?

You're quite right mate - what would your family think if you didn't stick up for them?

Where I come from(Edinburgh)there are lots of Indians and Pakistanis - they have shops on almost every corner. I see myself in a similar situation as them - relocating to a foriegn land. I have to put up with wise cracks now and again, and downright racism for being white. Generally I let it go.

If the family are threatened, no holding back, but I'm a pacifist. But I ain't going to play the dumb farang.

Neeranam. I can understand your desire to get stuck in when someone is rude but I guess most here would rather let it wash off them then cause a confrontation that could escalate out of control. This doesn't mean we will laugh at ourselves and then go and buy them all a beer and take their family to Tesco's, merely that there is a time to fight and a time to just let it go. Honestly if I had responded with a retort everytime someone has given me flak I would not be here to write this now.

My wise chinese martial arts teacher used to have two favorite sayings: "Better to swallow pride than blood" and "The best defence is to not be there". The one time he could do neither I saw him take down 5 men in a nightclub in Leeds. One day my friend someone will bite at your retort and may just come back with another verbal offering or they may feel the need to regain face by opening up a can of whoopass on you. I used to do security work in Leeds, and I also have seen what happens when Thais fight. Give me UK brawls any day, out here it ain't pretty.

Actually I wasn't speaking about getting violent, but just a funny response or one to show them that you know what's going on.

I studied Chinese Boxing and my Iranian teacher used to say very similar things. He was a champion kickboxer and had to use it in Leith quite a few times - due to racial attacks.

His advice on the first thing to do was run away, after I guess don't be there.

I only go out once a month at the most and this is because I would get in trouble with the drunken Thais.

I've been attacked before in Thailand for sticking up for myself - with a pool cues, bottles, knives, and a crowbar - but that's another story and off-topic. Also I have changed my lifestyle quite dramatically!

[Sing_Sling]

Please tell me I am wrong to react the way I did ?

Also I am worried the way that my eldest stayed clear of the action in a way that brought memories of Kenny Everett to me...

It is not nice to call people names. regardless of country or origin , I will never accept this, I will never walk away.

But how would you feel if some of these bozos had pulled a knife and your wife got stabbed to death in the melee? That's what I'd be worried about. You can never tell where violence will end.

That, of course, is always possible.

There's just something that rankles me about accepting all forms of abuse. The last fight I had was about 20-odd years ago just out of my teens and though I'm 6'2 and quite fit I'd suck at an all-out confrontation/fight.

Possibly it's all a matter of where and when . . .

[Maigo6]

But how would you feel if some of these bozos had pulled a knife and your wife got stabbed to death in the melee? That's what I'd be worried about. You can never tell where violence will end.

Good Point.

When I used to live in London, I had a French Girlfriend, she tanned easily and was of Spanish parentage, we were out running and some local pisshead that I'd seen in the pub shouted out, " Oi, what are you doing with a <deleted> Paki ", I replied , " I'm not with a <deleted> Paki, she's a <deleted> Frog dumbarse"

Edited July 27, 2006 by Maigo6

[Maigo6]

I only go out once a month at the most and this is because I would get in trouble with the drunken Thais.

Nearly 16 years I've never been attacked by any Thais, drunk or not.

What do you do to make Thai people attack you ?

I wanna know so I don't do it.

[tourleadersi]

But how would you feel if some of these bozos had pulled a knife and your wife got stabbed to death in the melee? That's what I'd be worried about. You can never tell where violence will end.

Good Point.

When I used to live in London, I had a French Girlfriend, she tanned easily and was of Spanish parentage, we were out running and some local pisshead that I had seen in the pub shouted out, " Oi, what are you doing with a <deleted> Paki ", I replied , " I'm not with a <deleted> Paki, she's a <deleted> Frog dumbarse"

Absolutely priceless!

[JRingo]

When approached by a local who stares at you saying, "farang"(guava), what do you say? I used to shout 'saparot'(pineapple) at them.

It never really bothers me now, although it did in my first few years here.

Most of the time nothing bad is meant, however said in a certain tone it can be very offensive.

However, "baksida", often heard in Isarn, is mostly used in an offensive/taking the p*ss way.

When some <deleted> shouted out 'baksida' when I entered a shop today in the middle of Khon Kaen City so as to somehow impress his chums, I couldn't hold back and shouted out 'bak haam noi'. This reverses the impression on his friends makes him look like an idiot. 'Bak haam noi' means something like little boy and is as impolite as him saying baksida.

20 years ago 'baksida was not offensive, but these days it is, unless said by the elderly.

Those who don't like Zinedane Zidane call him 'bakzidane'.

What do you say? Are you one of those who wander about calling yourself 'baksida' making a total dick of yourself?

Now, there is a good comeback.."You are a pineapple"

Does this incite rage?

[smartecosse]

Please tell me I am wrong to react the way I did ?

You're quite right mate - what would your family think if you didn't stick up for them?

Where I come from(Edinburgh)there are lots of Indians and Pakistanis - they have shops on almost every corner. I see myself in a similar situation as them - relocating to a foriegn land. I have to put up with wise cracks now and again, and downright racism for being white. Generally I let it go.

If the family are threatened, no holding back, but I'm a pacifist. But I ain't going to play the dumb farang.

Neeranam. I can understand your desire to get stuck in when someone is rude but I guess most here would rather let it wash off them then cause a confrontation that could escalate out of control. This doesn't mean we will laugh at ourselves and then go and buy them all a beer and take their family to Tesco's, merely that there is a time to fight and a time to just let it go. Honestly if I had responded with a retort everytime someone has given me flak I would not be here to write this now.

My wise chinese martial arts teacher used to have two favorite sayings: "Better to swallow pride than blood" and "The best defence is to not be there". The one time he could do neither I saw him take down 5 men in a nightclub in Leeds. One day my friend someone will bite at your retort and may just come back with another verbal offering or they may feel the need to regain face by opening up a can of whoopass on you. I used to do security work in Leeds, and I also have seen what happens when Thais fight. Give me UK brawls any day, out here it ain't pretty.

Actually I wasn't speaking about getting violent, but just a funny response or one to show them that you know what's going on.

I studied Chinese Boxing and my Iranian teacher used to say very similar things. He was a champion kickboxer and had to use it in Leith quite a few times - due to racial attacks.

His advice on the first thing to do was run away, after I guess don't be there.

I only go out once a month at the most and this is because I would get in trouble with the drunken Thais.

I've been attacked before in Thailand for sticking up for myself - with a pool cues, bottles, knives, and a crowbar - but that's another story and off-topic. Also I have changed my lifestyle quite dramatically!

that sounds like a night out in almost any scottish town these days

[skippybangkok]

Well recommended by whom? The self congratulatory tone is wholly inappropriate.You may have got a laugh out of this set of taxi drivers with your bargirl slang but you clearly have no idea of how to behave in Thailand.

The self superiority tone is wholly inappropriate. You seem to be familiar with the lingo....... (making the connection with bar girls. )

For all u guys living in Isaan and Married there ( not me ) , speaking Isaan according to this nut (Asshoel..oopps typo - Arsenal ) means your mrs. is automatically a bargirl. To my understaning Bak Ham Noi is generally used as an endeering term to boy toddlers and is normally positive not derrogative.