Death and dying

[JackisBack]

The older I get the more grumpy I seem to be and yes I know its an old cliche , my lovely wife bless her looks after me very well and I dearly love her to bits , that being said for some time now I seem to have become fixated by death and dying . For some strange reason now when I watch an old film , I can't help thinking that every one I'm looking at on screen is now dead. Not a week goes by when the news tells of yet another famous person who has died of old age , every one of my friends is younger than me , even out shopping I seem to be surrounded by younger people . I'm finding it hard to snap out of this death / dying syndrome , its not like I feel stressed out or mentally depressed its just a funny feeling I have while watching any thing old or historical and its full of dead people . Any one else get the same feelings ?

I'm 66

[rhythmworx]

Go and watch a movie "The worlds fastest Indian."

[Seligne2]

I have the same thoughts. The funny thing is that while we are looking increasing extinguished as we age, our hearts are still 16! I no longer worry so much about dying, but about the circumstances in which I die: not being a burden to my child, not lingering on for months or years, etc. I console myself with the words of Mark Twain, “I do not fear death. I had been dead for billions and billions of years before I was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it.”

[Costas2008]

OP, nothing to worry about.

One day we will all die, nobody is immortal except Mr Neverdie.

As about me, I had the same feelings when I was 60.

So came to Thailand, got a wife 26 years younger than me and suddenly all these thoughts have gone away.

Death is not one of my issues.

How to make my life happier is my main aim.

7 years later and I think I am succeeding.

[giddyup]

Not something I like to dwell on too much, but I know at 72 that I'm on borrowed time. What concerns me more is the possibility of failing health or debilitating illnesses. Leaving this world won't necessarily be a bad thing as I see more and more horror and destruction occurring every day, or perhaps I'm just more aware of it now, and I'm convinced there is no god, no sane creator could allow the suffering that goes on in the world.

[inzman]

Well it is consoling that others also have the same thoughts as me. Sucks for the body to age but not the attitude. Wish I could get a new body fitted. Haha. Enjoy today for what it is.

[Sigurris]

An interesting subject. At 55 I have just been told that I have less than 6 months to live. You never know when it is coming so enjoy what you have. I certainly didn't expect it. Live your life and don't sweat the small stuff after all its all small

[bkkmick]

Wow, Sigurris, that's a tough one. Sorry to hear that.

[Ulysses G.]

I certainly have become a lot more nostalgic. I've been watching a lot of documentaries about the 60s are realizing how much the world has changed during my lifetime.

[rijb]

Halloween is suppose to be a day to remember the dead, and laugh at death.

But, the older I get - the harder it is to laugh at death.

[Seligne2]

An interesting subject. At 55 I have just been told that I have less than 6 months to live. You never know when it is coming so enjoy what you have. I certainly didn't expect it. Live your life and don't sweat the small stuff after all its all small

Oy! Keep in mind that Anthony Burgess, the writer, was told the same thing when he was a British civil servant in Asia. Returned to the UK to hurriedly wrote some books to provide his wife an income. Went on to live about another 50 years! While there is life, there is hope!

[JackisBack]

Well I'm pleasantly surprised that comments from you guys are constructive , I was thinking that I may be the only older person here who may be thinking about the downwards slippery slope to the eventual end

I don't want to be too morbid , just realistic and this subject may not ring home with younger people who are still in their salad days but , and there's all ways a but , like people who are approaching their remaining chapter in life , many things start to creep into their thoughts . Things like the old chestnuts of , if I had my time over again or if only I had known that back then . Personally I can say hand on heart that Ive never been so happy with my life as I am now , the downside as ive said is this creeping paranoia that seems to be invading my mind , with troubling thoughts of what lies ahead in the knowledge that I'm only getting older and the inevitable grim reaper will come knocking at my door one day.

Trying to combat these type of thoughts seems to many people to be an easy thing to achieve , things like stop worrying your so lucky to have reached your age or take up a new hobby or travel to far off distant places and see the world . Well I'm quite content to stay home with my wife , ive seen some of the world and hobbies I have plenty of .

My health isn't fantastic , I'm a bit over weight and my joints ache and my hair said adiós many moons ago , but generally I feel fine but then again I keep reading articles that recommend I should go on a diet , take more exercise and drink less alcohol especially my beloved red wine , But I think to my self if I do follow that sort of health expert advice , how many extra years will it give me.

Some times lie in bed and think to my self , this may be the last time I lay my head on the pillow and I may not wake again up after falling to sleep . Really that end situation would suite me fine , no prolonged drawn out illness , no possible pain or suffering , and a quick end like that would be less of a burden for my wife .

I'm going to throw these in

If you could turn the clock back to when you were eighteen , what would you do differently.

Do you in your view take care of your health , or have you reached the point of '' I'm too old to care '' I'm just going to eat drink and be merry while I can .

What plans if any have you thought about for making your remaining time left a happy time .

Do you believe in an after life and that you will be back .

its good to know I'm not alone

[JackisBack]

Sigurris , what can I say but I'm sorry to hear that too

[Ulysses G.]

If you could turn the clock back to when you were eighteen , what would you do differently.

Get a degree in TEFL and a teachers license and move to Thailand. Living here with a guaranteed, decent income and long tern visa in your 20s would have been amazing.

[Gonsalviz]

I'm good with kicking the bucket. I really don't want to live into the drooling years even though it is a while away.

As long as my family is taken care of, I don't worry so much about me. Burn me and do as they wish.

[noahvail]

Sigurris, I'm 64. I had a triple bypass at age 49' using a new technique. Three months later, one of the bypasses failed. My cardiologist told me to put my affairs in order (did that before the heart surgery, duh) because I had less than a year to live. So I might have an idea of what you're going through. The cardio guy gave me a two page list of musts and mustn'ts. I looked it over and said, you're right doc, if I follow these lists I *will* be dead in a year. Fifteen years later, and I'm having to slow down a bit now because of arthritis. When I dropped my 650 Ninja 2 years ago at 0 kph and couldn't pick it up again, I sold it. I learned to ride after the operation and words of doom, when I moved from the US to New Zealand. And now I'm happy in Thailand.

Docs don't always know it all - and as humans they sometimes make mistakes. But the human spirit can overcome a lot of the obstacles that are put in our path.

Best of luck to you!

[JackisBack]

If you could turn the clock back to when you were eighteen , what would you do differently.

Get a degree in TEFL and a teachers license and move to Thailand. Living here with a guaranteed, decent income and long tern visa in your 20s would have been amazing.

Ive thought exactly that , just think of being eighteen and living here with a decent income and all that Thailand has to offer

and the stories you could tell your grand children .

[JackisBack]

Sigurris, I'm 64. I had a triple bypass at age 49' using a new technique. Three months later, one of the bypasses failed. My cardiologist told me to put my affairs in order (did that before the heart surgery, duh) because I had less than a year to live. So I might have an idea of what you're going through. The cardio guy gave me a two page list of musts and mustn'ts. I looked it over and said, you're right doc, if I follow these lists I *will* be dead in a year. Fifteen years later, and I'm having to slow down a bit now because of arthritis. When I dropped my 650 Ninja 2 years ago at 0 kph and couldn't pick it up again, I sold it. I learned to ride after the operation and words of doom, when I moved from the US to New Zealand. And now I'm happy in Thailand.

Docs don't always know it all - and as humans they sometimes make mistakes. But the human spirit can overcome a lot of the obstacles that are put in our path.

Best of luck to you!

Great and inspiring story , there is all ways hope and that combined with the human sprit can work wonders

[JackisBack]

Just a few random thoughts

Some times when I read an article about who is the longest living human, I'm interested in what sort of life style they had , what their diet consisted of and any snippets of advice for a long life span , some seem to have broken all the so called rules for a healthy life style like smoking , drinking and generally eating any thing they want .

longevity in some cases could be connected with human genes , your past parents lived to a ripe old age so you could have a better chance to live longer , my mother died at 46 and my father died at 66 both had cancer.

Ive got a funny feeling that having a '' happy '' outlook on life combined with a good sense of humor and a helping of
optimism plays an important part in your overall life span.

Two of my best friends both in their fifties , one a life long cyclist and health freak and one an avid squash player and
fitness instructor both passed away due to having a stroke .

Edited November 5, 2014 by JackisBack

[WitawatWatawit]

After a lengthy and debilitating illness, followed by a series of minor heart attacks, a few realities set in. Mainly that until that time, thoughts of dying were just being tossed about in my mind without any great sustenance. But now it was staring me in the face. After an initial bit of panic, I decided there was no point in even worrying about it anymore - what became more important was not how much longer I was going to live, but what I was going to do with my remaining time. I imagine most people think the same - quality of life in your dottage. When you realise just how mortal you really are, you actually enjoy your time more. Sure, you're not going to do any base jumping or take up parkour, but whatever it is that you fill your time with becomes just that much more enjoyable. In a sense, you "slow down and smell the roses", so to speak. I'm enjoying this time of my life. My only real fear now is an illness that will cripple and leave me dependent on others for years - to hell with that, it's not going to happen as long as I have just enough strength left to do ... well, you know what I mean - I've prepared for it. Often you read about old and dying people being asked if they have any regrets. I hope no one asks that of me because I don't care to answer it. I do not have misgivings, just pleasure in knowing that the few things I did do right will be remembered, especially by my precious daughter. Everything else is just grist to the mill and accepted as part of a life that was varied and ultimately enjoyed for the experiences they provided.

Wit (who is always full of this sh*t ).

[JackisBack]

After a lengthy and debilitating illness, followed by a series of minor heart attacks, a few realities set in. Mainly that until that time, thoughts of dying were just being tossed about in my mind without any great sustenance. But now it was staring me in the face. After an initial bit of panic, I decided there was no point in even worrying about it anymore - what became more important was not how much longer I was going to live, but what I was going to do with my remaining time. I imagine most people think the same - quality of life in your dottage. When you realise just how mortal you really are, you actually enjoy your time more. Sure, you're not going to do any base jumping or take up parkour, but whatever it is that you fill your time with becomes just that much more enjoyable. In a sense, you "slow down and smell the roses", so to speak. I'm enjoying this time of my life. My only real fear now is an illness that will cripple and leave me dependent on others for years - to hell with that, it's not going to happen as long as I have just enough strength left to do ... well, you know what I mean - I've prepared for it. Often you read about old and dying people being asked if they have any regrets. I hope no one asks that of me because I don't care to answer it. I do not have misgivings, just pleasure in knowing that the few things I did do right will be remembered, especially by my precious daughter. Everything else is just grist to the mill and accepted as part of a life that was varied and ultimately enjoyed for the experiences they provided.

Wit (who is always full of this sh*t ).

A enlightening post with a great frame of mind for the inevitable and another post from some one who has gone through illnes and heart related issues and still remains positive.

[JackisBack]

For any one like me who has reached their later years of life , do you ever think about what you can do to possibly prolong your life span
may be with altering your diet or embarking on a more physical exercise plan , or do you just say to your self no matter what I now do
its not going to drastically alter my life span , so I'm going to eat drink and be merry

[WitawatWatawit]

Perhaps for some people it's not a case of taking care of yourself to add extra years, but more of ensuring that the body is capable of enjoying what years you do have left. Quality of life, as I said earlier - I think that is more important. Perhaps looking after the old bod might ease the effects of some illnesses as well. But why worry about "extra years" when a fatal heart attack could strike at any time. Having minor heart attacks can make you think that way.

BTW, no longer for me the "eat, drink and be merry for tomorrow ..." approach - I like the understated style - the old bull approach . Much more fun when you surprise someone, especially the lasses.

[cooked]

My worst experience was when the doctor said ' ok take this. No sex for three months ' . I got that twice, I was 25. At 66 I am obliged to think, maybe not so much about death but about dieing. I never did it before, so just like every first time I am a bit nervous.

Sent from my GT-S7500 using Thaivisa Connect Thailand mobile app

[i claudius]

I had a heart bypass nearly 30 years ago. In the U.K. my angina used to keep me up ,we came here to live full time 10 years ago I never thought I would live this long I feel good my angina does not bother me like it did before, life is good I have loved every minute of it and still do and hope I have a good few years left as I known my family will be heartbroken when I go ,

[otocheater]

Dear OP

My best friend pass away 2 months ago in UK. She's stronger than me but she lose for cancer. So sad.

Life too short. Dont think too much. Whos know what is going on tomorrow. Just enjoy your day.

:-)