How Do You Feel About Your Kids Mixing With Thai Kids?

[mikemac]

Reading the subject of the post it reminds me of a Jordanian man I met in Aqaba who had spent years living and working in Germany but had moved back to Jordan with his son now that his son was just reaching teen age. I asked him why, and without hesitation and with sincerity he said that he didn't want his son to be exposed to the negatives of western culture at that very sensitive age, and felt he would be in a better overall climate of influence in Jordan. I was mixed in how I felt about it. On the one hand it seemed like a cheeky thing to say considering that I'm western myself, but on the other hand I quite understood his reasoning. It gets to the crux of the matter that many migrants are in another culture for what 'they' wish to get from it (for many, to earn money first and foremost let's be honest), and are very selective about what they expose either themselves or their children to. I think this applies also to western families moving to very different cultures. China towns, Little Indias, Little Britain's all pop up for a reason. Perhaps there is an initial interest in the culture being moved to, but the average migrant Pakistani or Chinese family in Britain is going to keep a tight hold on the reigns if they can manage it. I guess the Austrian couple will be in Thailand for what 'they' wish to get from it all and for their children, not the whole package, and will be no different from the aforementioned Jordanian man in this regard.

No, they were just "stuck up" Aussies. Frowned upon and treated with contempt back home, usually get away with it when on "the continent".

[kurnell]

My girls go to school with some hiso Thai kids and they are all charming and we'll behaved. Their parents have been to my house for kids parties and don't mix well at all with my expat mates but they do all turn up and get along well with the msz and all other parents.

[Norrad]

Both my kids are mixed and my oldest was born in my home country. He had a good grasp of English and Dutch when we moved back to Thailand. He battled to learn Thai, so we enrolled him into a completely Thai school nearby and he loves and we love it. He is now 4 years old and fluent in 3 languages and has a good grasp of our different cultures. I have no problems letting my kids mix with Thai kids.

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[nithisa78]

I had a friend. It was number of years ago. . .a friend. The benefit was being a friend. . .having one, no expectations, no regrets.

They had just had a child from another. ... .I was helping them for though it continues to amaze me, parents ditch their children. In any case. Once it was understood we could have become serious, I was asked about the child and their playmates. I see Thai children, the many positive advantages of being friendly with Thai children, it sets them a cut above children in most of the rest of the world born outside the ruling class.

The Thai adults and young adults I know in the west, all focused. Not just that they can speak and have the ability to learn different languages, there is an appreciation. It is an appreciation that is rarely found among foreigners posting as guests in their beautiful country, right here on TV. You know the ones frozen in the past.The ones that think their way is the only way. That they are in Rome but Rome must do what they say and they're not going to help. Just complain and make demands.....find fault. How many countries have they built. I don't mean to insult old ladies but that is what I've heard them called. I've a much more graphic label for them. It is Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. Pass the spicey. Didn't I say, Thai spice plus 2. Thank you again.

[Elsuisso]

Pretty pointless living here, having kids and a family here and trying to shield your kids to behave like they are home - wherever that is. I mean what would be the point of that?!

Like coming here and wanting all the stuff you have in the UK, the only place you are going to get that is in the UK - doh!

Kids are kids, they are smarter than you think. For me and my son, if he learns to respect the older

Community, have respect for others, enjoy his life as much as possible then that's enough, for God's sake he's only 2!

There are bad kids in the west; bullies, toffs, all that. Go figure it out.

The best upbringing a kid can have is by their parents, guiding, loving and nurturing them, where they are in the world and who they hang out with should actually be secondary. Some parents think kids going to school means they will get an "education"; I see them everyday dumping them

Off so they can go shopping, play golf, whatever. No one's going to have an impression on your child

like the parent, end of. Put effort in and results will come, no matter where you are.

There is a lot to learn from Asian culture, to shield them would actually be backwards.

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[AnotherOneAmerican]

The Thai adults and young adults I know in the west, all focused. Not just that they can speak and have the ability to learn different languages, there is an appreciation. It is an appreciation that is rarely found among foreigners posting as guests in their beautiful country, right here on TV. You know the ones frozen in the past.The ones that think their way is the only way. That they are in Rome but Rome must do what they say and they're not going to help. Just complain and make demands.....find fault. How many countries have they built. I don't mean to insult old ladies but that is what I've heard them called. I've a much more graphic label for them. It is Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. Pass the spicey. Didn't I say, Thai spice plus 2. Thank you again.

Off topic,

Just to point out Queen Victoria's policy was "To make every country England"

And her empire built many of the countries in the world.

(Not to mention she was an old lady)

[nithisa78]

The OP and the farangs living in that housing village appear to be a bunch of arrogant snobs and one big reason why I would never want to live in a so-called farang community or have them as neighbors.

My 3 children were brought up with Thais from an early age, their childhood friends were all Thais and the family they know are all Thai. All have prospered here and are better off for it. There is no need to give any, move back to your own country comments because it seems that those in the said housing village have created their own little so-called hi-so circles and consider themselves superior to the Thais inside and outside of their self created environments, full of their own importance.

The types of farang or half farang children mentioned in the OP, I would never had wanted my kids to be associated with the likes of them who are given sheltered lives away from the real world and have parents with high pompous attitudes. Who would want to be friends or mix socially with people like that?

I bet financially many of those farangs living in the housing village are not so well off, more than likely would be considered just average working class peasants in their home countries yet once they plonk themselves in Thailand will put on airs and graces and start believing they are supreme and above those living around them in status. To put in mildly, these are the types of people I loathe, the fake and phoney that in reality would do nothing for anyone but rather wallow in their own self-gratification that actually fails to impress anyone in the real world.

The OP describes these people as nice and professional, he even considers his wife’s nephew as unworthy and too low class to be a part of his family. I describe them as inhospitable and pretentious or what we used to describe as sardines and curtains types of people, meaning, they have posh curtains hanging in their windows for appearances sake but inside they have many things to hide, probably live most of their lives on credit and can only afford sardines for their tea. Nice and professional, perhaps only on their facebook profiles. I wonder how many of these high class professional people have to do visa runs as they are unable to meet the requirements for long term stay with Immigration?

As you may guess by my above comments, I have an extremely low regard for those types of people, farang, Thai or otherwise.

Good read, thank you.

[AnotherOneAmerican]

The best upbringing a kid can have is by their parents, guiding, loving and nurturing them, where they are in the world and who they hang out with should actually be secondary. Some parents think kids going to school means they will get an "education"; I see them everyday dumping them

Off so they can go shopping, play golf, whatever. No one's going to have an impression on your child

like the parent, end of. Put effort in and results will come, no matter where you are.

There is a lot to learn from Asian culture, to shield them would actually be backwards.

Hmmmmmm,

Most of the Thais I know, send their children off from age 2, to school leaving at 7:30 am and returning at 4:30 pm, 6 days a week.

Not sure you are all that up on modern Thai culture. Don't know about many other Asian cultures but Korea & Japan is even worse.

Edited December 21, 2014 by AnotherOneAmerican

[nithisa78]

"Unselfishness is the badge of human greatness."

[FritsSikkink]

What a load of racist <deleted>, there are good and bad kids from every nationality.

[gamini]

The worst thing I ever did in my life was to take my two Thai children to Australia for education. Thier association with Ausralian kids made them bad., impolite and a lot of other things. I was not aware at the time that Australia had the secong highest juvenile delinquincy rate in the developed world. We returned to Thailand and I really dont want them mixing with farang children

[Elsuisso]

The best upbringing a kid can have is by their parents, guiding, loving and nurturing them, where they are in the world and who they hang out with should actually be secondary. Some parents think kids going to school means they will get an "education"; I see them everyday dumping them

Off so they can go shopping, play golf, whatever. No one's going to have an impression on your child

like the parent, end of. Put effort in and results will come, no matter where you are.

There is a lot to learn from Asian culture, to shield them would actually be backwards.

Hmmmmmm,

Most of the Thais I know, send their children off from age 2, to school leaving at 7:30 am and returning at 4:30 pm, 6 days a week.

Not sure you are all that up on modern Thai culture. Don't know about many other Asian cultures but Korea & Japan is even worse.

I thought we were talking about Farang kids?

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[Torrens54]

Would have to depend on the KIDS...both yours and the Thai kids.

When we lived in Australia, some of the kids at my daughter's school were perhaps not suitable playmates but most of them were fine.

Back here in Thailand I'm pleased to say that my wife and I have met all of her schoolmates and have no problems with ANY of them. I have however seen a number of Ferang kids in our village who behave like Rowdy Louts on their bikes and around the Pool and Basketball Court.

[SantiSuk]

If you need to bring up your kids in your home culture, go home now!

[canuckamuck]

A lot of unfair attacks on the OP, he brings up a valid topic. Thailand is a different culture and different standards are upheld here and there are certainly things I would like to avoid with my kids. Things like it being acceptable to lie in order to save face, and it is OK to judge people by the color of their skin. Or that spending 5 hours a day at an internet café is an effective use of your time and money.

On the other hand I see that Thai kids tend to respect elders and understand how to be polite or reverent in certain situations.

Thinking back on my childhood, I know that I gravitated towards the bad kids and it took a very long time for me to mature and start making something of myself.

I would really like it if my kids could avoid the very counterproductive attitude I had up until my mid 20's. I feel if I had been raised in Thailand with the very permissive parents I had, I wouldn't have rebounded and would be like the many wasters I see picking zits on their scooters hanging out all day with drug addled brains and without a thought for tomorrow.

But here we are in Thailand, and it is up to us to bring balance to what they see and experience. If I want my kids to benefit from my set of standards I need to find a way to relate to them and help them to make good decisions. This would be just as true in the west as it is here. Some very bad kids back home and some horrible parents too.

Edited December 22, 2014 by canuckamuck

[infinity11]

in a blender, no problem, they all taste the same

Edited December 22, 2014 by infinity11

[pigeonjake]

When he was young we lived in the UK so untill he was 12 he mixed with British kids of all classes ,well off and ordinary,they were all nice ,since coming here he mixes only with Thai young adults ,most seem very nice ,and very polite ,but their parents are all quite rich , As he has really never mixed with "ordinary" kids here like he did in the UK .He has turned out to be a nice young man so it is difficult to answer ,but from what i see most ordinary kids seem ok ,

i wish i new what ordinary kids were,?

kids are kids rich or poor family a kid is still a kid, that likes to play,

thers will be unrulely kids both rich and poor,,

[Neeranam]

My kids are Thai kids, and out with other Thai kids and Burmese kids every day.

I don't let them mix with farang kids though ..........

Not your country!

Why are you on an expat forum then?

[Neeranam]

One thing I have really noticed is that you never see the fathers at the pool or at the play ground (that does go for the western fathers with Thai wives too apart from me of course, seriously)...its always only ever the mothers that you see...the kids just pretty much run riot and are seldom given much guidance or told what or what not to do or what is or isn't correct behaviour. None wear bike helmets and none are supervised while playing (kids aged 3 and 4 riding bikes around the village and swimming in the pool completely unsupervised...such freedom is lovely to see for sure but at the same time it does seem a bit young to be unsupervised).

Yes it is indisputable that they are all polite kids..that is beyond question...they are nice kids on many levels. Its just the lack of control and lack of maturity that worries me....they do seem very far behind their "western" or "expat" counterparts in their demeanour and maturity.

Thai dad has to work 12hrs a day, 7 days a week.

Yep, not much free time to go out with the kids.

Retired western dad, on the other hand, has all the time in the world.

Not all Western dads are retired. There are a lot more older Thai dads with young kids.

When I pick my kids up from school ther are many Thai dads doing the same.

Strange how someone professing to be half Thai and half american knows so little about Thailand and America but everything about the UK

[A1Str8]

He smiles a lot recently.

[AYJAYDEE]

my wifes thai kids from her first marriage were as well behaved as any farang kids I've met. and when they came to my country they did extremely well at high school, went to college , graduated with good grades and are very successful in their careers and as parents of their own children. i find your attitude offensive.

[Chuckles78]

Kids will be kids. Some misbehave more than others regardless what nationality they are.

I would be more concerned if my son was growing up with school kids today in Switzerland or Australia.

Either way I think it's important for children to integrate in the country they are being brought up in and learn from the local kids.

[EyesWideOpen]

I have a 4 year daughter in school here. Before attending school, she was always very soft and gentle. Now she plays rough, guess too much time playing with the boys at school. There is a Thai child at my building here that speaks very very bad words. My wife is shocked every time the child talks. So I have forbidden my child to play with him. Peer pressure is enormous, do not underestimate it.

Edited January 4, 2015 by EyesWideOpen

[thehelmsman]

I was sure our 3 yr. old daughter was on her way to be the next movie star. But after playing with all the baby boys in the soi I've got my money on her being a Mui Thai boxer.