I'm getting milked dry by issan family

[ScarpoFongness4U]

sorry OP,

your details are too sketchey to ponder anymore,

without more facts, you are beginning to sould like a cheap charlie, not wanting to pay for what you thought was free sex

while you are considering coming clean with the floor, ponder this:

[misterfarang]

excuse me OP... got a few questions.. answer them to yourself and see...

- are you that much desperate and ugly to put it with this?

-why do you date a girl that you need to support not only her but the entire BS parents.

- do you feel good inside a relationshit based on money?

- why do you accept here things you would not accept in your country?

then decide...

one friend of mine only w,oke up when invited to visit the isaan family and thai litterate enough to hear the laid back father tell the girl: "tell Farang to go get beers ...we are thirsty"

great! the guy who worked all his. life had to pay respect and drinks to the father as fat as a pig who barely worked or studied..

empty your purses ..farang ..all of them!

keep some change to get back your brains at the airport deposit mate.

[peterb17]

To be honest, this sounds like microscopic amounts of money - a new battery for the motorbike! A few hundred baht .

If they are demanding a new house and pick up I would understand.

Hardly milking you dry.

[sydneyjed]

Play it cool and tell your GF that you have very little money now and you can't afford to fund her families lifestyle anymore.. then stand back and see what happens.If she then decides to disown you and the family kicks you out..you then know the real reason for why she entered into a relationship with you..FOR YOUR MONEY!

If she decides to still stand by you then you know she has genuine feelings for you and that my friend will be your answer!

Edited February 11, 2015 by sydneyjed

[Mr magoo]

replace the GF

job done.

any more crap questions you need answering?????

[BlackJack]

NEXT

[wowfactor10]

Well at least you made new friends..

Probably soon they will go with u for new furniture shopping..

Do not forget to bring your bank cards...

[Nowisee]

IF you like her and she fun to be with, the answer is not to run or dismiss all isaan girls as what has been described above many times.

First, sit down and explain to the girl. I am NOT paying for more than what you and I eat or do for activities. I am ok with occasionally going out to local food joints and I am ok with paying for your immediate family ONLY. Clarify this before going and before ordering the food.
IF the parents, sisters, brothers, etc...want stuff, tell them you are not going to pay.
IF you like the girl for what ever that is worth, don't be run off by the actions of the family. Confront it and end it... it is not difficult to say no. It is not difficult to get on a bus and leave.

2 years here and I have never paid out more than a reasonable amount of money for the gf, food and fun. When we go out, I almost always pay for everything as I can afford it and she deserves it for putting up with me....55555... and for stopping at the market and bringing me a bag of mangos and papaya and insisting on not taking money from me for them.

[ScarpoFongness4U]

Chiang Mai is so close..... I would go there, get myself a nice quiet place where the organic restaraunts are and open an account on Thai friendly, nice girlsl there all looking for the farang home-run hitter

Mate, I have played it both ways, with the nice girls and with the soapy and dancing prostitutes

I repfer the working girls and a goodo tip buys loyalty, dont be cheap,

but there is no substitute for starting with the pro's

they know you are temporary, and some will try for longer, but they know better

the dollar cost average devided by time, is where your money is best spent.

unlss you re planning on rooting down, where every few weeks, a prettier bunch rolls into toen, 10 years younger than what you paid in for

[thejcb]

This one is very easy, there is one English word which can be used to remedy this..

Look at them straight in the eye, pause for a few seconds and then say very slowly and confidently "NO"

You have your hand on the tap, its your decision, just turn the tap off.

The other method is to state that if they all go to a restaurant of YOUR choice and you shall pay the bill.

However, If they wish to go to another restaurant of THEIR choice then THEY must pay.

Seems reasonable to me and guess what, whenever I have used this, the other party always meekly reply "we go to YOUR restaurant"

[Jip99]

IF you like her and she fun to be with, the answer is not to run or dismiss all isaan girls as what has been described above many times.

First, sit down and explain to the girl. I am NOT paying for more than what you and I eat or do for activities. I am ok with occasionally going out to local food joints and I am ok with paying for your immediate family ONLY. Clarify this before going and before ordering the food.

IF the parents, sisters, brothers, etc...want stuff, tell them you are not going to pay.

IF you like the girl for what ever that is worth, don't be run off by the actions of the family. Confront it and end it... it is not difficult to say no. It is not difficult to get on a bus and leave.

2 years here and I have never paid out more than a reasonable amount of money for the gf, food and fun. When we go out, I almost always pay for everything as I can afford it and she deserves it for putting up with me....55555... and for stopping at the market and bringing me a bag of mangos and papaya and insisting on not taking money from me for them.

A very good point - which is why I suggested reading Thailand Fever.

It will help to understand the cultural differences and you can then set your stall out for what you are prepared to pay and where/how you draw the lines.

[greenchair]

Seriously,you are a grown man. why are you living with mummy and daddy. You are bonking her in their home. You don't think that is free do you? ??

You are using them , as much as they are using you.

Now pay up and shut up.

Or

Get out and give em nout .

[tomacht8]

The priorities from thai country girls are usually as follows:

1. take care father and mother

2. if she have, then her own children

3. her brothers and sisters

4. maybe her old village thai boyfriend

5. all other family members

6. her friends

7. all village neighbors

8. all animals on the farm.

9. the house dog

10. then you.

Change your living situation far away from her family and/or change girlfriend.

[kinmaew]

Mate get out. Who needs all this BS and it ain't gonna end.

[kinmaew]

and when you leave do it Thai style that is totally without notice, just take off its the only language they understand. Logic does not come into play.

[Equalizer]

I think you will find that this nice girl is exactly the same, she is just telling you what you want to hear. These people are not the brightest stars in the sky, it just so happens us men forget to look up when our eyes are affixed onto a pair of t""ts.

[Jai Dee]

A rather nasty personal attack on another member has been removed from this thread.

Members are reminded of the following from the Forum Rules:

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[iamariva1957]

Listen.. I agree: "Run Forest Run!" But that is not always an option if you are in love and your sense of responsibility, dedication, moral standings, your cultural parameters, etc seem to stop you from being able to do that. Then there are the issues regarding your GF's feelings towards you and your relationship with her and her with you vs her family (which here in LOS is almost sacrosanct if not defiantly so).

So what to do? Stand your ground is first. Just say, "No"! Blame it on being Tax Time at home. Blame it on your family's needs. You know... lie. Maybe this will change their way of thinking or at the very least make you not such an easy 'touch'. Then, and this is important, remove the latter from your inventory. We Farangs are always getting into that sort of trouble simply because we are always converting the Thai prices into our own home currency. Suddenly 1000THB becomes less than $30 (or 27 Euros) and that is cheap in our minds, so we think nothing of covering that cost most of the time without thinking about the ramifications of that action.

We all have this 'problem' and it is difficult to shed during our daily life. But we have to. Recognizing this is the key and I say, "No" all the time. I also say that I "will be happy to pay half" but always there to see the deal and be part of the purchase. I add into the deal making my observations and business capabilities. I also complain when something does not make sense or seems questionable. Oh, the Thais do not like this as it seem 'confrontational', but I say, "too dam bad" in my head and stick to it. I do it all with a smile and in a calm voice, but I do it and thereby hold my ground and show that I am not going to be a push over, stupid Farang (which we are in the eyes of most Thais). As the Thai way is the 'only way' in this country, but it can be derailed if one is steadfast. No, it does not always work out as I would like at the end of the day, but at least I try and keep the feelings of 'being taken' to a minimum.

As for your issue with the dog... just say, "No". That is BS and everyone knows it... even your GF. Make sure that they know that you know it. It is a Loss of Face if you do point it out to them in a clear manner. No one wants to argue and over $30 or so. You might think that it is stupid, but you have to stand your ground! But everyone should pay for what they have broken or destroyed or had a hand in doing. Pay for the book, but make clear that you know.

Issan is cheaper than most places. But it has a reputation (as do those from there) as being a place where Farangs are not only looked for to become members of a Thai family but also as moving, living, sex starved, ATMs. We all know that we are not and that we are just Human Beings but we seem to forget that we are from a different culture and do have more financial capabilities than most here in this entire country. It is a label that we have been given for decades now. Just as Thailand is seen as one giant brothel by the rest of the West for the most part... with beautiful beaches. But the fundamental issue here is that we have to set the record straight and start standing up for ourselves and what we are willing to do and what we are not. If the GF leaves you because of you not stepping up to support her family, then she ain't the right one for you. So... again...

"Run Forest, Run!"

Edited February 11, 2015 by iamariva1957

[loonodingle]

Perhaps you should start by looking at yourself. Some psychiatric help wouldn't go amiss. Don't blame the family blame yourself. Firstly for your choice of girl. Then every decision you have made there after. I also wonder if this is just a made up story just to keep the guy's talking on TV FORUM.

[longstebe]

The priorities from thai country girls are usually as follows:

1. take care father and mother

2. if she have, then her own children

3. her brothers and sisters

4. maybe her old village thai boyfriend

5. all other family members

6. her friends

7. all village neighbors

8. all animals on the farm.

9. the house dog

10. then you.

Change your living situation far away from her family and/or change girlfriend.

The first part of your post is full of tosh.

The latter part of your post I can totally agree with.

[pbonline]

Just wonder how stupid a falang can get?

Tell both the gf and her family to F off.

The first thing I tell any gf subject here is, start asking me for money and the door is over there.

My gf have now learned that I give her everything she needs anyway but not one dime to her family, they had food on the table before I got in the picture..

No 1 rule here is, never live closer then 500 km to your gf`s family, the longer the better.

Edited February 11, 2015 by pbonline

[enufsaid]

Oh how many Falangs cry on here " sob sob" thut she loved me but she lied. Any relationship anywhere that's based on funding is not worth having. I have a Thai friend & she will tell you, "she not good girl" RUN

[kelboy]

Read Stephen Leather's "Private Dancer" mate!

Then reverse and accelerate!

Keep up mate.

[onelasttime]

Assuming this is not trolling, then you may have chosen the wrong lady, or choosing the wrong way to deal with it. Not all Issan women / ladies / wives are like this, mine certainly isn't. You are making choices, so either live with the choice you are making or, make a different choice; that choice being to turn off the baht tap. Only then will you see if your lady is genuine or a gold digger.

just my two cents worth.

[finnomick]

One, this will happen if YOU let it anywhere in Thailand. Isaan is not the only place. Two, when they want to go out to dinner tell them you are not hungry but they are welcome to go without you. Without you to pay for them they won't leave the building. Live and learn -- we all do.

[jackh]

I can't believe you TV ppl! This dude is nothing but a dumbass troll. Stop feeding him (it).

[EmptyHead]

Leave very very quietly in the middle of the night, never to be heard of again. There is no need for explanation. They deserve nothing. You are nothing to them. Stay, if you are happy wasting your time. She is just as bad as them for doing it, though she may say, "it's not me its my family..i have to listen to them".

My GF doesn't listen to anyone. And her family don't ask for anything.

P.S..there is no such thing as good or bad. You should get this notion out of your head. We make up these ideas. Your aim should be to find a girl that you can live with. She won't be good or bad, but as time passes by you will have these perspectives.

Edited February 11, 2015 by EmptyHead

[tutone]

Get rid of the dog. Stay out of the milk barn. Say no and see how long your GF still love you.

[Jim walker]

A simple NO occasionally can have a great outcome if its you being soft then its you that is the problem

[henry15]

I hope to read some expert insights on this matter here on this Thai forum.

Never, and I mean NEVER! Date a person who makes less money than you.

Never, and I mean NEVER! Date a person with a dependent family.

I don't mind paying

That is your biggest mistake. You are now only an object that supplies money. That will never change (and no, love will not conquer it).

Very solid advise;

I will give you, one more

Never , and I mean NEVER! Date a person who have children