I know that the bum gun topic comes up once every few weeks when some newcomer to Thailand comes along and asks "Is that thing beside the toilet really for spraying my arse?"

Having said that, I don't believe that we have ever explored the bum gun itself, and what really is the ultimate bum gun in terms of design and functionality; what to buy to replace the bum gun in our condo.

This thread is borne out of necessity. Yesterday morning whilst washing up after my morning constitutional, the gun failed in my hand. The plastic pivot point for the trigger broke off and the spring fell out, allowing the metal plunger bit to reach "Wide Open Throttle".

After an eye opening jolt of full pressure water, I had to try off quickly, get dressed and run out into the hallway to the service closet and shut off the water. During these precious few seconds, the bum gun had been flailing around at full pressure and soaked the entire bathroom.

A trip to the local Big C revealed a selection of guns. I picked out one that looked like the previous one that had been installed from the beginning in our condo, paid the reasonable 300 THB, took it home and installed it. End of problem.

Or so I thought... until she arrived home. She hates it. She says that the spray pattern is too big, the holes in the nozzle are too small, and that the trigger action is not good.

After trying it myself later in the day, she is absolutely correct. This gun has a hair trigger- all or nothing. The spray pattern is definitely too big, so that the water goes many places where it is not intended or desired, and the small holes in the spray head create painful little jets of water that feel like needles in a most tender area.

So- we are on a mission to find the ultimate bum gun, and address all of these concerns. I am also going to buy and install a valve on the outlet pipe from the wall to help control overall pressure and provide easy shutoff if the gun ever fails again.

Some considerations include:

Spray pattern: has anyone ever seen a bum gun with an adjustable spray head? Of course a fine mist spray is desirable for cleaning the tender regions, but a full power jet spray is useful for hosing down the bathroom floor and shower.

Shape and ergonomics: has anyone ever seen a bum gun with trigger mounted on the front? It seems to me that this would allow more precise control with index finger as opposed to the thumb trigger on the back.

Trigger action- smooth and controllable. I'm not sure how to test this, but figure the one with the strongest resistance in the spring will achieve this.

Price is not a consideration, unless it is a ridiculously high 4 or 5 digit price. I'll spend some good money on something that gets used daily for an important function in our household.

I'm curious to know what other members have, and name brands to look for, or any suggestions. Tell us about your bum gun and what makes it truly ultimate.

Moved to Pub.

This is so intriguing. My downstairs bathroom is way too strong and my upstairs bathroom barely dribbles out. I can't seem to fix either one.

Moved to Pub.

Good idea, but it's a bit early for me.

Hot on the heels of another bum gun thread for all aficionados of one of life's little pleasures. Where's your perfect bum gun? For me it's the bogs next to Glen Bar at Pullman Bangkok King Power. Perfect pressure and perfect spray direction to deal with those " messy" moments.

Mine is a couple of inches from my backside when needed.

moderate pressure is ok most of the time and does the job but sometimes i'm in the mood and crank it up to full pressure. naughty but nice.

Like buses, bum gun threads come in bunches.

This one can join its friends in the Pub.

Between hyku's cargo shorts and mca's bum gun, I think it's time to switch off the computer and lean over a balcony for a while.

As there were TWO bum gun threads started today, they have been merged.

The cheap blue plastic Thai ones are too fragile and sensitive. I got ours from Australia, stainless-steel with a valve that is easy to control.

Works a treat...

I agree, I have two toilets with different bum guns fitted. In one I have a cheap plastic one fitted, no trigger control it stings like hell.

In the other I have a nice stainless one with great trigger control, Tobodo brand from global house it's very refreshing.

Just been over to the inlaws to see what brand they use and they show me this.

3 bhat.

They should have a facility at the shop to try them out. Impossible to tell just by looking.

I suggest a good spray focus from multiple jets to buffer impact, combined with a smooth action trigger which regulates flow through trigger pressure.

And then perhaps a switch for pulse action, for those who wish to tarry a while

Edited March 8, 201511 yr by canuckamuck

^^^ You also need a temperature switch, soap spout and an air dryer. And someone to help you zip your pants back up. You know there's no point in half measures.

Install a valve between bum gun and mains so you can adjust water pressure.

Easy

Yermanee

Nothing short of an enama for me , problems start when the water to baan goes of and no paper in the toilet.

As in my village we have bugger all water pressure,i don't think anything would help.

Between hyku's cargo shorts and mca's bum gun, I think it's time to switch off the computer and lean over a balcony for a while.

Don't fall off it....otherwise another suicide in the news section....or maybe TFV is the secret behind all those "suicides"???

And if worse comes to worse. The old "bucket and ladle" does the job.

Bidet seats I encountered in Korea led me to prefer a narrow, pinpoint type of spray. In Thailand similar seats are sold at home hardware stores but are, surprise surprise, way overpriced. The most basic model is around Bt 2500. Looked for a hand held spray with a small nozzle but none could be found here. Ended up picking up a couple of DIY install types during my last trip to the US.

Bought two of the more popular models on Amazon, the Luxe Bidet Neo 110 and Astor Bidet, both around $30 or less. Prefer the Luxe due to it's protective cover of the spray nozzle and slightly higher quality hardware.

After installing the Mrs really likes it too. It's super easy to use, surprisingly accurate and she can also wash the other part just by shifting herself a little.

Edit: I should also mention installation was a major PIA for us. Firstly, we had to cut the seats with a rotary saw so the attachments would fit. Secondly, the hose connector that comes with the bidet is 5/8" vs the 1/2" standard here (Thais calls them size 5 and 4 respectively). You need a 1/2" (female) to 5/8" (male) adapter if I remember correctly (the bidets were installed at her hometown). I have yet to find such a thing anywhere here. Luckily I had another hose from the US that we could swap with. Also lucky my uncle-in-law is an excellent handy man.

Edited March 8, 201511 yr by puuchaibaa

That looks more like a space ship than a bum gun. Do you have a photo of it working?

I'm not a plumber so I'll ask.

What special (plumbing) thing needs to be done in order to have one of these installed in UK?

Does it have to be inspected (like everything else)?

Visitors have fallen in love with them!

That looks more like a space ship than a bum gun. Do you have a photo of it working?

Here is another picture I found. The spray was photoshopped in

Edit: you'll notice the seat pictured flares down only a bit where it touches the bidet. At my Mrs' house the seats flare down a lot more so we had to cut a bit at the back.

Edited March 8, 201511 yr by puuchaibaa

That looks more like a space ship than a bum gun. Do you have a photo of it working?

Here another picture I found. The spray was photoshopped in

Ah, I get it now, nice pice of kit.

design a bum gum with lips so that some people can ki** their own bum

I replaced all in our house after breaking with American Standard, brushed stainless steel with steel valve lever. I guess they will last long. It's a bit modern design, works perfect and no comments from the boss too.

This one in a hotel in BKK was a bit over the hill for me, it took me quite a while to figure out how to get it started without unpleasant side effects.

First time I saw the 'bum gun' was in the toilets in various airports at the UAE. Then I saw them in Thailand. I know that Muslim people are supposed to wash after toilet,a very good tradition/custom of course, hence the gun. I am not sure if it is a Thai custom as well or they install them in order to serve the all important and loaded people from the petroleum states of the arab world. I do not remember seeing them in Europe, though.

my question really is, is this implement a necessary part of the average Thai household bathroom?

This one in a hotel in BKK was a bit over the hill for me, it took me quite a while to figure out how to get it started without unpleasant side effects.

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Wow that really is the ultimate bum gun, I bet nobody can beat that.