Thai woman opinion about foreigners looking for love...

[dragonfly94]

well i am hanging on with mine but a wonder what the Thai falang divorce rate is?

[Rod Wallop]

well i am hanging on with mine but a wonder what the Thai falang divorce rate is?

65%

[zeichen]

"Zeichen: It's a good thing that having your respect is as useful as a one legged race dog, many of my mates are happily married to Thais."

I know that you probably just read quickly and just reacted but you entirely misread.

I said those that want a Thai wife. not those that are married to someone who is Thai. If you came to Thailand looking for a Thai wife, then yes I think you are silly. Coming to Thailand and dating and meeting people and eventually finding someone you love and marrying them is different.

"'Most expats are looking for a servant'?"

Thank you for misquoting me. Would you like to be reported or will you concede that you are misleading what I said.

Those expats that are looking for a "Thai Wife" are no different than women looking for a Foreign husband, They have an agenda. Why would an expat come to Thailand to marry any woman that will marry him just some random Thai woman? Those individuals that walk around trying to find a Thai wife, aren't looking for love. Love comes in all shapes sizes, forms and nationalities, those that limit themselves to a nationality are most likely looking for a subservient partner not an equal.

Which is much different than the many wonderful mixed marriages based on mutual affection, intellect that happen to be of different ethnicity.

You probably still don't see the distinction, but that is ok.

[Blackfox]

Thaipopsy; how do you really feel being married to a foreigner 15 years your senior?

How much of it was love?

The rest of it companionship, security or something else?

A real genuine attraction I hope.

Since it's an anonymous forum, is the sex life satisfying?

Any temptation to slip between the sheets with a younger man who flatters you?

In answer to your last question; yes. She's in the much older mans "pool".

But I doubt it'll happen as they will be wishing to "plug" a younger girl short time after popping structural support med to relive his youth and then (for many) be stupid enough to engage the girl long term. Meanwhile her family upcountry are chomping at the bit to access that foreign currency.

Edited May 7, 2015 by Blackfox

[ozzieovaseas]

If you read behind the lines i think what the Thai lady in this post really wants to ask is..what we hear..time after time after time from Thais...

"why do farang like the dark skin lady?"

in other words...."why they not want me?....after all im SO much superior"

Anyone who seen a few of those types can pick that attitude a mile off. Spoilt brat..silver spoon type, never been told NO..Zero discipline from parents and a sense of entitlement that is beyond belief.

It is the biggest turnoff of any female anywhere IMO.

The answer should be quite obvious, although it can be more covenient to use the good ole tried and tested " westerners think tanned skin is desirable, whereas Asians consider white to be more attractive" garb..yeah right!

For my own opinion, a certain other type does not need thousands of baht of clothes in wardrobe, does not fill your trolley up with thousands of baht of useless whitening (scam) creams, does not expect expensive holidays at top notch hotels, does not order thousands of bahts of food in restaurants and eats 2 mouthfulls and leaves the rest for the bin (just because they think it makes them look good)...and they certainly dont speak English to well

Actually they dont seem to take you for such a big mug/buffalo either...ie speak English in a dead set European sounding accent while trying to tell you they never lived with a farang and learnt English in Bangkok at an American language academy

[Berkshire]

I don't do this very often, but checked out Ms. Popsy's profile just to see if she's posted previously. From her previous topics, it seems she had a messy divorce in June 2014, but by Sep 2014 was already married and seeking advice. Says both her and her husband are in their 50's. Hmmmm. She seems to start a thread but doesn't return often to reply. In this thread, she's gotten quite a few constructive comments, but seems to only be looking for answers that she wants to hear....which is "foreigners who are interested in Thai women younger than themselves are pure evil!" Why is it that we get so many oddballs on TV?

Edited May 7, 2015 by Berkshire

[Blackfox]

Berkshire, I'm now doubting Ms Popsy will come clean.

Perhaps the thread should be closed down if no word from her?

[Berkshire]

Berkshire, I'm now doubting Ms Popsy will come clean.

Perhaps the thread should be closed down if no word from her?

Hard to say who's for real and who's not anymore. Just don't understand why someone would start a thread and just disappear. Unless they're trolling....

[samuibeachcomber]

After 3 relationships with Thai women I would never consider another one. They look nice but most have the curiosity and logic of a gold fish, they are just too shallow. After the novelty wears off their main interests in life of food, family, shopping and fb/line tends to become boring.

this is so true....blame the education system or lack of one.

[Berkshire]

After 3 relationships with Thai women I would never consider another one. They look nice but most have the curiosity and logic of a gold fish, they are just too shallow. After the novelty wears off their main interests in life of food, family, shopping and fb/line tends to become boring.

this is so true....blame the education system or lack of one.

Are you suggesting that you too would never have relations with a Thai woman?

[dragonfly94]

Berkshire, I'm now doubting Ms Popsy will come clean.

Perhaps the thread should be closed down if no word from her?

Hard to say who's for real and who's not anymore. Just don't understand why someone would start a thread and just disappear. Unless they're trolling....

Does seem to happen rather a lot, maybe it's an official policy to drive up views and posts?

[metisdead]

A number of trolling nonsense posts, inflammatory posts and replies have been removed.

[HLover]

"Zeichen: It's a good thing that having your respect is as useful as a one legged race dog, many of my mates are happily married to Thais."

I know that you probably just read quickly and just reacted but you entirely misread.

I said those that want a Thai wife. not those that are married to someone who is Thai. If you came to Thailand looking for a Thai wife, then yes I think you are silly. Coming to Thailand and dating and meeting people and eventually finding someone you love and marrying them is different.

"'Most expats are looking for a servant'?"

Thank you for misquoting me. Would you like to be reported or will you concede that you are misleading what I said.

Those expats that are looking for a "Thai Wife" are no different than women looking for a Foreign husband, They have an agenda. Why would an expat come to Thailand to marry any woman that will marry him just some random Thai woman? Those individuals that walk around trying to find a Thai wife, aren't looking for love. Love comes in all shapes sizes, forms and nationalities, those that limit themselves to a nationality are most likely looking for a subservient partner not an equal.

Which is much different than the many wonderful mixed marriages based on mutual affection, intellect that happen to be of different ethnicity.

You probably still don't see the distinction, but that is ok.

Absolutely brilliant, I stand corrected. Thank you for showing me this distinction. I enjoyed your point about it is silly to come to Thailand looking for only a Thai wife, your insight is a true revalation.

[Nowisee]

As far as the OP... she sounds like too much baggage and attitude for me.

There's a way things should be and there's a way things are.

The social, age, educational and especially cultural differences of thai/farang relationship pose series challenges. Most will not succeed as true loving marriages. There will be the underlying security for the thai woman and she will stay only for that, the smart ones take the farang for everything he's got.

Realistically I agree with a thai woman doctor that told me, the reputation here is quick love or as she put it, 'easy come, easy go'.

She said a lot of the girls don't even know what true love is...

I'll continue to date while I live here, because I can and there is the saying, I used her and she used me. It's usually fun until the stupidity, jealousy and lack of rational forward thinking appear.

I've had more meaningful relationships with the filipina.

[green job]

As far as the OP... she sounds like too much baggage and attitude for me.

There's a way things should be and there's a way things are.

The social, age, educational and especially cultural differences of thai/farang relationship pose series challenges. Most will not succeed as true loving marriages. There will be the underlying security for the thai woman and she will stay only for that, the smart ones take the farang for everything he's got.

Realistically I agree with a thai woman doctor that told me, the reputation here is quick love or as she put it, 'easy come, easy go'.

She said a lot of the girls don't even know what true love is...

I'll continue to date while I live here, because I can and there is the saying, I used her and she used me. It's usually fun until the stupidity, jealousy and lack of rational forward thinking appear.

I've had more meaningful relationships with the filipina.

Cant you see this a set-up Scam??? probaly from Ghana Plaza Suckhumvit Or better known as banana Plaza

[mogandave]

Please...... read the title well......

I said..."looking for love"... NOT "looking for easy and cheap sex, and a free housekeeper"

If you do believe that 25 years old uneducated Thai women are dating and marrying 40 years old plus non Thai speakers foreigners for love...do not even comment my posting....Please.....

In my opinion, most men interested in a serious relationship want children.

You seem to be implying Thai women are shallow.

Your "friends" can't bear the idea of dating an older man, yet the rail against men that want to date younger women. Seems rather hypocritical to me.

[EyesWideOpen]

Please...... read the title well......

I said..."looking for love"... NOT "looking for easy and cheap sex, and a free housekeeper"

If you do believe that 25 years old uneducated Thai women are dating and marrying 40 years old plus non Thai speakers foreigners for love...do not even comment my posting....Please.....

In my opinion, most men interested in a serious relationship want children.

You seem to be implying Thai women are shallow.

Your "friends" can't bear the idea of dating an older man, yet the rail against men that want to date younger women. Seems rather hypocritical to me.

Well said.....

[thaipopsy]

Berkshire, I'm now doubting Ms Popsy will come clean.

Perhaps the thread should be closed down if no word from her?

Hard to say who's for real and who's not anymore. Just don't understand why someone would start a thread and just disappear. Unless they're trolling....

Sorry guys...I do not have so much time to be looking at this forum, that sometimes is interesting. My husband do. I work very hard and 7 days a week, something you do when working in an own business. My husband just take care of the home, the garden, fishing by the lake, and meeting friends..and cooking many times. He is a wonderful cook! He do not feel bad that I make more money than him. Me neither. We have enough to have a nice life. He is 15 years older than myself, that is very common age difference for couples in this country. My first Thai husband was 12 years older than me. I am happy that I found a good "farang", a smart one, because between Thai and foreigners the problem is the language. Without a good communication love cannot exist. My husband is a very good looking old guy, strong and funny. He makes me laugh all the times because we like to have fun. And he is a fantastic lover too.

But, most important, we are craze in love.

What I do not understand is about couples with 25 years or more difference in age, and without any good language skills. And women talk..a lot in Thailand...more than in western countries...with all details, and we know what is happening in those marriages. Very sad, but we keep smiling.

Edited May 18, 2015 by thaipopsy

[beachproperty]

Berkshire, I'm now doubting Ms Popsy will come clean.

Perhaps the thread should be closed down if no word from her?

Hard to say who's for real and who's not anymore. Just don't understand why someone would start a thread and just disappear. Unless they're trolling....

Sorry guys...I do not have so much time to be looking at this forum, that sometimes is interesting. My husband do. I work very hard and 7 days a week, something you do when working in an own business. My husband just take care of the home, the garden, fishing by the lake, and meeting friends..and cooking many times. He is a wonderful cook! He do not feel bad that I make more money than him. Me neither. We have enough to have a nice life. He is 15 years older than myself, that is very common age difference for couples in this country. My first Thai husband was 12 years older than me. I am happy that I found a good "farang", a smart one, because between Thai and foreigners the problem is the language. Without a good communication love cannot exist. My husband is a very good looking old guy, strong and funny. He makes me laugh all the times because we like to have fun. And he is a fantastic lover too.

But, most important, we are craze in love.

What I do not understand is about couples with 25 years or more difference in age, and without any good language skills. And women talk..a lot in Thailand...more than in western countries...with all details, and we know what is happening in those marriages. Very sad, but we keep smiling.

Good to see you return and respond.

Glad to hear your in such a Happy relationship and "crazy in love" but your question for your friend was ."Do you think that she will only have to look in a lot older men?"

Then you go on to say your husband is 15 years older .....so what is the cutoff for the age gap....15, 18, ...20 years? Obviously you think 25 years is way to old!

Since your friend is 43 It would seem, according to you, that a husband of 58-60 would be OK......so what's the problem....she's damaged goods (married before, older, etc)....

AND if a man 58-60 is OK ...then what's the problem with a man who is in shape, witty, and charming who is 70 years or older. Is it the age difference of 25 or more years you find repulsive?....Putting an age gap limitation seems to part of her problem....the other part, as I have posted earlier, is her checklist of must have's (which I am sure she has) ..

My advice is to get rid of the checklist, including the age gap limitation, .......live her life and if she finds love....great

[Macclad]

Your friend is not bad for 43.I think she could get a guy 55 years upwards,no problem.

But that could depend on the type of family she has.eg.if she has 3 teenage sons that dont work or a pregnant daughter who is married to a drunken loser,that would be a big turn off for a farang guy.....both emotionally and financially.

[eldragon]

Your friend looks great. And there are plenty of attractive women in their 30s and 40s here that I'd love- or even prefer- to have a relationship with. The problem is the attitude. I find more times than not that I don't connect with Thai girls my age. They're too traditional and conservative. And they seem to care way too much about what their families, friends, or even strangers think about them.

Like it or not, I find girls ten to fifteen years younger than me- girls in their 20s- have an attitude that matches up a little better. I think the same can be said for girls that work in the bars. Despite all the problems they tend to have, their attitude is generally more similar to that of a western girl. So western guys are more comfortable spending time with them.

There's also the baggage issue. And the fact that many girls are not as single as they say they are. All things considered, a lot of guys feel like they can't have a serious relationship with a girl here and just go with what's available.

[zeichen]

"I think the same can be said for girls that work in the bars. Despite all the problems they tend to have, their attitude is generally more similar to that of a western girl."

You are either totally insane or have never met a woman from the west. Go tell your mom and sister that they are similar in attitude to a Thai prostitute. I am certain that they would be so happy.

[WhamBam]

@ the OP....

In almost 10 years of being here and living in various areas, I have dated Thai women of various ages from 25 +. Most 35+ years old as young ones can be a bit of fun and that is about it.

All of them have had one main interest in life and that is money. Money rules.

These women have been from a variety of backgrounds.

Y - her family have almost 200 Rai of rice. Not exactly a poor family. A car, a truck, several houses for family.

M - her family are not poor either. She works at Chula Uni in BKK. Her sister has a high profile job there, as does the sister's husband. Family are well housed, they all have cars, good jobs. They also have sugar and rice lands.

T - Chinese / Thai grandparents. Not really wealthy.

N - her family are quite well to do. Own land. All have their own houses. Brother built a new 3 storey house while I was with her. Great family. Very friendly and helpful. Work very hard. Good connections thanks to the brother's business.

Others of various financial persuasions and backgrounds.

All these relationships were working quite well until the demands began. Demands for more and more money. What is wrong with being content with what they were given monetarily. My money is not theirs by some divine right. Why is it deemed I must buy a fancy new car, or a house that I cannot own?

Plenty of these women scam. There is no need for it.

There is more to life than money. What about honesty, a genuine, loving relationship, caring, being able to communicate, showing feelings? Being faithful. Being happy to go to a normal restaurant, having noodles, or a beer or two in an average pub / bar / club? Understanding Thailand did not invent everything from mobile phones to tv's and washing machines. That there is a world outside of their own borders.

I have had more honesty and no demands from my Thai friends. Also from other genuine people. And there are plenty of those. Even the women working the bars who I chat to at times are quite genuine.

These days, I'll stick to not having a relationship with a Thai woman. It is less hassle, thanks.

[eldragon]

As far as the OP... she sounds like too much baggage and attitude for me.

There's a way things should be and there's a way things are.

The social, age, educational and especially cultural differences of thai/farang relationship pose series challenges. Most will not succeed as true loving marriages. There will be the underlying security for the thai woman and she will stay only for that, the smart ones take the farang for everything he's got.

Realistically I agree with a thai woman doctor that told me, the reputation here is quick love or as she put it, 'easy come, easy go'.

She said a lot of the girls don't even know what true love is...

I'll continue to date while I live here, because I can and there is the saying, I used her and she used me. It's usually fun until the stupidity, jealousy and lack of rational forward thinking appear.

I've had more meaningful relationships with the filipina.

Very well said, mate. Couldn't agree more. Especially on that last one.

This doctor, did she mean quick love is the norm for Thai girls with any man or just with foreigners? One thing I've noticed here is many of the Thai girls that date foreigners have some tale about a lone Thai man that broke their heart and ruined them on Thai men forever. Yet these same girls will date foreigner after foreigner who often times do them the same or worse than any Thai man ever has or would. Which kinda tells me the feeling with foreigners just isn't the same. The heart is not in it.

[Rhys]

now girlfriend, what da heck, girl,what are you tankin... you like broken song, girl...looken por lub in all da prong faces.. learn to dress first girlfriend..like big secret I share wi cha.. BWW don't be liking an hole...on the pole... you be peelin it sistah...

You gotta pay da caenplayer... you wanna ram wong.... wad da hekc...Thai man don't be wantin.. you tankin A Fdude..be wanti to do a..walk step down the bamboo walk of love... Dang sistah.. sistah up ... word..

[gk10002000]

This reminds me of a cartoon. It showed 60 year old falang man dating a 25 year old Thai girl in Thailand. The next picture showed a 25 year old guy dating a 60 year old woman in Palm Beach Florida!

In some places and in some circumstances things are different. I happen to live in Palm Beach and have been to Thailand over a dozen times on holiday so I found the cartoon especially cute.

[Lukecan]

Most 20-25 year old girls that marry 50-60 year old dudes entertain young local/farang cock on the side.

[IMA_FARANG]

I will not comment on your remarks, but the one thing I do know after 60 plus years of watching relationships between men and women of all ages is that any statement such as "all men" or "all women" that makes a generalized assumption what "all men" or "all women" want is usually far to simplistic and likely to be a mistake.

That is because any such statement about "all men" or "all women" is based on a to narrow assumption and fails to take into account the reality of the diversity of what human men and women really want in such relationships.

What men or women really want in a relationship, and what they tell others they want is often entirely different.

It may shock you but I know of a 55 year old woman in my extended Thai family who after many years of happy marriage and children whose husband died began a sexual relationship with a 23 year old man. Her explanation to "why would she do this" to shocked family members was 'because I want to".

Edited May 23, 2015 by IMA_FARANG

[nev]

I get frightened the amount of guys who come to Thailand age 55 and want a 20 yo, its disgusting

I get more frightened and disgusted by the Muslim guy in the paper yesterday with his 7 year old bride.

If a 20 year old wants security and support from a older man what us wrong with that?.

[Inn Between]

As far as the OP... she sounds like too much baggage and attitude for me.

There's a way things should be and there's a way things are.

The social, age, educational and especially cultural differences of thai/farang relationship pose series challenges. Most will not succeed as true loving marriages. There will be the underlying security for the thai woman and she will stay only for that, the smart ones take the farang for everything he's got.

Realistically I agree with a thai woman doctor that told me, the reputation here is quick love or as she put it, 'easy come, easy go'.

She said a lot of the girls don't even know what true love is...

I'll continue to date while I live here, because I can and there is the saying, I used her and she used me. It's usually fun until the stupidity, jealousy and lack of rational forward thinking appear.

I've had more meaningful relationships with the filipina.

I think she meant, " easy income, easy go"