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What would you advise the bunch of long stayers who became full of cynicism?


flyDelight

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Thailand - love it or hate it or hate it but live it, it's remarkable so many of them are not happy. A part of Thaivisa became like a therapeutic center where sexpats/longstay tourists think they can let their hate and cynicism flow via any random topic. They don't want to go home for a fresh breath but became mentally switched off and stuck in a daily ritual of gossiping, complaining and alcohol consumption like a bunch old ladies. What would you advise to those poor guys?

I had a negative period too that started after 10 years, decided to stop reading local news that helped a lot keeping out negativity. Started to remind why a one way flight Thailand was the best move in my life. Refuse to let my time being spoiled by visa rules and stopped comparing with other countries where some things are more easy. All together Thailand is still a great crazy place full of pleasure and adventure, food, massage, uncomplicated people, business challenges... Only many foreigners are so damned serious about themselves. laugh.png

Someone should write an article: "Expat Life Hacks for Living Happy in Thailand"

What are your life tips to stay positive here?

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Some people are not happy unless they are complaining. I stay away from them as I have always been happier here than the place I lived before I came here. My question to the cynical is, "If you are not happy why are you here?"

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Some people are not happy unless they are complaining. I stay away from them as I have always been happier here than the place I lived before I came here. My question to the cynical is, "If you are not happy why are you here?"

They are pessimists and it wouldn't matter where they are, its in them and there yet to see the light, my brother inlaw, is forever problem solving before actually happens, he's trained himself to be that way, it intresting to that he is forever having screenings for this or that, I've never known someone to have so many operations,......even his dog is a diabetic...law of attraction do you think?

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Reminds me of a couple I met a few years ago. They were in the 30 year old range and had been here for about a year and a half. They said that they loved Thailand but were going home.

I asked them why and they said that they loved Thailand and the people but many of the foreigners were so negative that they were starting to get to be like them and Thailand is to beautiful to look at that way. So before they became as miserable as those people they were leaving.

I have met some I honestly think no body wants them back where they come from. Foreigners going off of balconies does not surprise me. They feel like there is no place for them to go.

Edited by big carl
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I would never dream of giving anybody "advice"....most especially when they haven't asked me for it. If I have been through a similar experience I will share with the person what steps I took, that is not to suggest he should do the same. Contrary to what people may think, Alcohol is actually a depressant, you might find that a lot of negative, thoughts, feelings and emotions can be contributed to downing excessive amounts of same.

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They are beyond advice....

Due to suffering from an incurable dose of ThaiVisaness ;-)

Seriously though I suspect the truth is that many made an ill judged decision to move to Thailand based on no more than a few weeks holidaying in Pattaya where they managed to get laid more times than they did in the rest of their lives, and with much prettier and younger girls. Many are also economic migrants aware that their meagre pensions would afford them a better lifestyle than in their home countries. Of course even in Thailand its possible to get through your money very quickly - especially with the help of a bar girl or two. Many of these disillusioned expats thus end up with little option but to remain in Thailand as they have no exit plan or resources to return home and start again. With many of them not even having the ability to learn or speak Thai their only means of communicating their feelings and emotions is by pouring it out here...

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Most complained about home as well, the rest tried to take a bar girl away and were shocked she returned..... Thailand is a wonderful place to live.. Like all counties must adhere to visa laws, not so hard, if your intentions a good...

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Stop moaning, go back home for three months, do not sell everything you own in Thailand, then when you realise you have made a big mistake you can come back to Thailand and start your new life once again where you left off. This time, remember the grass is not greener on the other side of the fence. Get used to the fact, you cannot change anything, this is Thailand, it is their country, they like it the way it is, integrate, do not start complaining again, be thankful that this time you have made the right and final decision. Look around you, start to enjoy your life with the friendly locals, make friends with different people, people from all over the world. Avoid the axxxxxxs, there are plenty of them around.

I have been here over seven years and find it an interesting and exciting country to live in, every day I learn something new. When I was working I enjoyed my work, my last forty years I was self-employed and worked all over the UK and Europe so had no real culture shock coming here, here there is just more of it and it is in your face.

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Some people are not happy unless they are complaining. I stay away from them as I have always been happier here than the place I lived before I came here. My question to the cynical is, "If you are not happy why are you here?"

I agree. Seems like alot of people come here for the wrong reasons, and then want Thai society to change to their liking. Also one major culprit, is the misconceptions people have about Thailand.
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I think the biggest problem with most of the expats living in Thailand is quite simply that they don't do anything! I couldn't face a life of staying in a condo all day watching TV or being on the internet.( it would drive me nuts....) Thailand offers a great " outdoor life " of walking,beaches,exploring,photography and some parts even perfect for Bike Rides too! So rather than spend all day enclosed in a room with the air con switched on max,get out there and " enjoy life " or you might as well go back to europe and live in a static caravan!

F.J clap2.gif x

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I have been here 15 years. I came to teach Business Management on the MBA Course to senior Thai executives. I also met my Thai wife and we got married 13 years ago. I used to laugh at the crazy things that happened with Thai people, but now they get on my nerves all the time. I used to laugh at the corruption, at the many bad spellings everywhere, even on police, government and high class businesses.

My skepticism changed to cynicism when my university in Bangkok in the April just allocated all my courses to Thai professors, even though each course was listed out to June 30th on my contract. I saw a lawyer who said I could sue them but it would take a long time and a lot of money, certainly more than the 220,000 baht I lost.

Although a fighting fit man and boy, I then was hit with 5 major operations which swallowed all my reserve money and most of my daily account. A replacement knee operation went wrong 4 times and insurance only paid for the first. Then my insurance stopped as I was over 70! So all of the last 5 ops I have had to fund myself.

My English pension keeps us with an ok life, but the luxury life we had has gone. Now I am a 76 year old cynic, who has changed from a fully active life to a horrid life of eating , which has got so boring, sleeping badly, and going for a swim 2-3 times a week.

And all this time things here in Thailand and Pattaya have got worse and worse and more expensive, on a fixed pension. I have no insurance and panic every time I go out with the crass stupidity of the majority of drivers. A crash would take every last penny I have.

I cannot and do not want to get out and go back to England because my Thai wife would never be able to cope with that life. She is a basic country girl, but we love each other. She would have no friends, doesn't like our food very much, and no hobbies other than watching Thai TV.

So I am an old cynic who has no idea what to do for the next 10-20 years. Thailand is not the Thailand of 15 years ago, and every day there are more stupid things imposed on us. Help please.............

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I dont think its just from living here, I occasionaly fly back home for contract work and 99% of the people I work with are bitching moaning every <deleted> day. Whatever you were back home comes right back after you have settled here for a bit and the holiday period is over.

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Yeah but......that would be your personal take on the subject of foreigners ( you mean white guys, as in farang foreigners ) not been happy here just because they like to vent some criticism and they are often cynical about Thailand.

Gee Whiz Batman: Is there anyone who has not complained about some aspects of living in Thailand while everyone is cynical to a degree.

Maybe?...those people who complain and criticize have good reason to vent their opinions about matters that many others complain about also...but you do not hear them complaining.

Most of it comes from social media news and TV and or actually seeing what goes on around them and they have something to say about it ...just like many other people have something to say about numerous other matters ...as there is plenty of issues needing to be addressed so there are loads of issues to discuss and express a persons opinion about while living here in Thailand.

Meantime...of course you come across the odd person that is just bitter all the time and well classified as a curmudgeon

curmudgeon
[ker-muhj-uh n]
noun
1.
a bad-tempered, difficult, cantankerous person.
Curmudgeons are everywhere and not just exclusive to Thailand
Cheers
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Stop moaning, go back home for three months, do not sell everything you own in Thailand, then when you realise you have made a big mistake you can come back to Thailand and start your new life once again where you left off. This time, remember the grass is not greener on the other side of the fence.

Something a lot of people would do well to remember is that even if the grass on the other side of the fence is greener - it takes just as long to cut!!

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