Is It Ever Acceptable For A Thai Girl To Cheat?

[Lorn]

If her English is good, then it's likely she has been doing this for a while. So if she makes 4-7k a night, why does she still have no assets?

How old is she and what kind of place does she live in? No way if she's pulling in that kind of money would she be staying in a place that costs under 15k/month. Also are you sure she doesn't have a child? I think the vast majority of working girls here (unless they were born in Bangkok and are just doing it part-time) do.

You seem to like her but what are your plans- have you had any thoughts of how long you are going to stay in Thailand? You talk about her having a short career life, so she needs to be saving a lot unless she's going to live off you in the future. Outside of the Middle-east, it's very difficult for an English teacher to support a family on only one salary, especially if you want your child(ren) to have a good education themselves.

Edited March 22, 2016 by Lorn

[Kenny202]

There are girls hawking their fork nearly every night and 100's of thousands of baht must be slipping through their hands. They'll still live in a 2000 baht a month fan only cold water room sharing with 3 or 4 other girls. I can never understand where the money goes? Motorcy taxi boyfriend, gambling, money back home take care of mom and the kid, handouts to every other no hoper up country. Mind you food can't be cheap. I mean thai food at 35 baht a meal is cheap but they'll order 4 or 5 dishes, bottle of Song Sam or such. I guess do that 3 times a day 30 days a month it adds up. Heard one success story of a bargirl saving her money and doing something with her life but only one. Ever talked to any of the old girls in the bars and heard their stories? No hope of a customer but if they're lucky someone may unwillingly pay her barfine when gets added on to some drunk saps check bin. I think it's just a case of easy come easy go. Same as many up country. One lady I knew, dirt poor. Most times couldn't pay electricity or water. Wins 100k baht lottery. She put on a party cost her 70k baht....to show she wasn't poor. Rest was gone in a week. Similar story another lady husband died and she collected a substantial (for a thai) insurance pay out. Had 3 kids To support alone. Next day she has gold, new clothes. Good for her I thought. Her young husband died through alcoholism so no loss. Gold was gone in one month as was the rest of the money. Saw her waiting to get picked to go work cutting Aoy for 200 baht a day. Missus asked her what happened? She gambled it all away. Totally hopeless

[JD66]

Let me state the obvious.....She's your ''girlfriend'' and you're trying to justify and feel sympathy for someone who is betraying you, lying to you,manipulating you and making a fool out of you??? Not to mention the potential disease(s) that she might infect you with by screwing anything and anyone for $$$. How grossly pathetic .The fact that you who ( I assume is an adult male ) even came here and had to ask the grown-ups ''Is it alright if my girlfreind cheats on me?'' Well you definitely have some serious self worth and self esteem issues. Incredible.

[stephenterry]

So what? Enjoy it. Live dangerously. While it's not easy to contract hiv from a one-off bang, if you're banging ANY working girl on a regular basis, the risk of infection increases. It's VERY important to take precautions and insist on both of you to visit a clinic and get tested. NOW. AND don't accept any excuse.

[uthaithanirules]

There are girls hawking their fork nearly every night and 100's of thousands of baht must be slipping through their hands. They'll still live in a 2000 baht a month fan only cold water room sharing with 3 or 4 other girls. I can never understand where the money goes? Motorcy taxi boyfriend, gambling, money back home take care of mom and the kid, handouts to every other no hoper up country. Mind you food can't be cheap. I mean thai food at 35 baht a meal is cheap but they'll order 4 or 5 dishes, bottle of Song Sam or such. I guess do that 3 times a day 30 days a month it adds up. Heard one success story of a bargirl saving her money and doing something with her life but only one. Ever talked to any of the old girls in the bars and heard their stories? No hope of a customer but if they're lucky someone may unwillingly pay her barfine when gets added on to some drunk saps check bin. I think it's just a case of easy come easy go. Same as many up country. One lady I knew, dirt poor. Most times couldn't pay electricity or water. Wins 100k baht lottery. She put on a party cost her 70k baht....to show she wasn't poor. Rest was gone in a week. Similar story another lady husband died and she collected a substantial (for a thai) insurance pay out. Had 3 kids To support alone. Next day she has gold, new clothes. Good for her I thought. Her young husband died through alcoholism so no loss. Gold was gone in one month as was the rest of the money. Saw her waiting to get picked to go work cutting Aoy for 200 baht a day. Missus asked her what happened? She gambled it all away. Totally hopeless

But you are only going by what you see.

A few anecdotes about a few train wrecks.

Think about it, all those sex tourism places, Nana, Pattaya etc....how many girls all up, currently, I think according to WHO there are anywhere up to 5 million sex workers in Thailand currently

Where are all the ones say 20 years ago, that were in their 20s.

Sex workers or not we see many thais terrible with money.

No doubt there were many that blew all the money.

But no doubt there were also many that saved up, bought a business, hiso condo in Bangkok and many probably emmigrated.

You are only going by what you see.

I dare to suggest that the majority of such girls do hoard enough for later in life, otherwise you'd be able to see millions of destitute ones

Where are they all?, all the ex bar girls now in their 40s, 50s and beyond ( several hundred are married to TVF members )

[khundon]

I think it is taught in Thai schools, as part of the national curriculum.

[Kenny202]

There are girls hawking their fork nearly every night and 100's of thousands of baht must be slipping through their hands. They'll still live in a 2000 baht a month fan only cold water room sharing with 3 or 4 other girls. I can never understand where the money goes? Motorcy taxi boyfriend, gambling, money back home take care of mom and the kid, handouts to every other no hoper up country. Mind you food can't be cheap. I mean thai food at 35 baht a meal is cheap but they'll order 4 or 5 dishes, bottle of Song Sam or such. I guess do that 3 times a day 30 days a month it adds up. Heard one success story of a bargirl saving her money and doing something with her life but only one. Ever talked to any of the old girls in the bars and heard their stories? No hope of a customer but if they're lucky someone may unwillingly pay her barfine when gets added on to some drunk saps check bin. I think it's just a case of easy come easy go. Same as many up country. One lady I knew, dirt poor. Most times couldn't pay electricity or water. Wins 100k baht lottery. She put on a party cost her 70k baht....to show she wasn't poor. Rest was gone in a week. Similar story another lady husband died and she collected a substantial (for a thai) insurance pay out. Had 3 kids To support alone. Next day she has gold, new clothes. Good for her I thought. Her young husband died through alcoholism so no loss. Gold was gone in one month as was the rest of the money. Saw her waiting to get picked to go work cutting Aoy for 200 baht a day. Missus asked her what happened? She gambled it all away. Totally hopeless

I dare to suggest that the majority of such girls do hoard enough for later in life, otherwise you'd be able to see millions of destitute ones

Where are they all?, all the ex bar girls now in their 40s, 50s and beyond ( several hundred are married to TVF members )

Of course I'm only going on my experience. I've spent time in Pattaya, Bangkok and lived in Isaan 2 years. Many of the girls would come back to the village New Years / Songkrahn. Neither the girls (younger and older) or their families had anything close to wealth and were just as poor as the day the girl first left. Some nice clothes, makeup and an iPhone. Maybe 5k baht in their pocket. Certainly no condos, cars, shares etc. Parents had Pssed away anything they got from the girl. The object of the parents, and thus the girl is to get a farang (atm) husband, not an income. Ive heard it discussed. Any money the girls earn is easy come easy go. Most have ridiculous credit card debts, parents have loan shark debts. And in most cases the girl isnt working 7 days a week and some dont always get a customer when thet do work. Say 1500 a night for an average of 20 nights a month allowing for periods, nights off, sickness etc. Obviously some do bettet than others and have good months and bad months. Even a thai living in a sht box room in Pattaya would easilly have expenses of 40k with food, debts, money back home, phone, internet. Strangely there were quiet a lot of ex workers living back in the village living with no hoper drunks...Not a pot to pss in. I suspect their career ended due to HIV, herpes, hepatitis etc. Yep some maybe make...well when I say make it I mean Snag a farang...but I can't agree with you that the majority of them succeed. The destitute ones end up back in their villages...destitute living on rice and chilli sauce. Edited March 22, 2016 by Kenny202

[ableguy]

This is just about the dumbest post I have ever read, I would suggest if you want wise up please try and find a few Nigerian friends who will be able to show you some very quick ways how to make a ton of money, if you want to find a loving Thai partner and future mother of your children I would suggest Pattaya or Soi Cowboy Bangkok. Failing any of these suggestions working may I suggest you back home.

[ableguy]

There are girls hawking their fork nearly every night and 100's of thousands of baht must be slipping through their hands. They'll still live in a 2000 baht a month fan only cold water room sharing with 3 or 4 other girls. I can never understand where the money goes? Motorcy taxi boyfriend, gambling, money back home take care of mom and the kid, handouts to every other no hoper up country. Mind you food can't be cheap. I mean thai food at 35 baht a meal is cheap but they'll order 4 or 5 dishes, bottle of Song Sam or such. I guess do that 3 times a day 30 days a month it adds up. Heard one success story of a bargirl saving her money and doing something with her life but only one. Ever talked to any of the old girls in the bars and heard their stories? No hope of a customer but if they're lucky someone may unwillingly pay her barfine when gets added on to some drunk saps check bin. I think it's just a case of easy come easy go. Same as many up country. One lady I knew, dirt poor. Most times couldn't pay electricity or water. Wins 100k baht lottery. She put on a party cost her 70k baht....to show she wasn't poor. Rest was gone in a week. Similar story another lady husband died and she collected a substantial (for a thai) insurance pay out. Had 3 kids To support alone. Next day she has gold, new clothes. Good for her I thought. Her young husband died through alcoholism so no loss. Gold was gone in one month as was the rest of the money. Saw her waiting to get picked to go work cutting Aoy for 200 baht a day. Missus asked her what happened? She gambled it all away. Totally hopeless

But you are only going by what you see.

A few anecdotes about a few train wrecks.

Think about it, all those sex tourism places, Nana, Pattaya etc....how many girls all up, currently, I think according to WHO there are anywhere up to 5 million sex workers in Thailand currently

Where are all the ones say 20 years ago, that were in their 20s.

Sex workers or not we see many thais terrible with money.

No doubt there were many that blew all the money.

But no doubt there were also many that saved up, bought a business, hiso condo in Bangkok and many probably emmigrated.

You are only going by what you see.

I dare to suggest that the majority of such girls do hoard enough for later in life, otherwise you'd be able to see millions of destitute ones

Where are they all?, all the ex bar girls now in their 40s, 50s and beyond ( several hundred are married to TVF members )

They are back in the village planting rice , toothless and haggered, living with some waster.

[mercman24]

taken from the pages of PRIVATE DANCER if you don't know the book get it and read it. i think you are gonna lose a lot of baht in this country lol !!

[JayBird]

I'll just add my two-bits here (mostly through Thai Translation from Thai people):

1) There are plenty of jobs around. However, they only pay 9k/mo on average (BigC, 7/11, MK, etc. are always hiring). If you are lucky you can grab a 12k/mo job.

2) Most of the higher paying jobs require a degree (often any degree), and a lot of Thais and poor Thais do not have degrees, so can only get the 7k/mo job.

3) The thai girls who work bar/etc. are greedy (or their families are greedy). They want an iPhone, they want a Car, they want all that everyone else has. You can't get that with a 7k/mo salary.

4) When they get old, they seem to go work at massage shops (normal massage shops as they get older). Thai GF translated private conversations she had with many Thai masseuses (legitimate ones) who said they used to work bar and switched as they got older. My own conversations with these masseuses confirm that they are still looking for a Farlang husband (and sadly, one of my favourites found one and I lost out on a good deep tissue massage!!!!)

Personally, I don't feel bad for the girls who work bar, they HAVE options, they just choose to do what they do. I remember one older Thai mama-san who told me the girls want to work bar rather than work in office (even ones who have degree) because is easier to shake their bottom and make money than to work in office.

My one little bit of advice to all non-Thais: The Thai socio-economic-family structure is very odd and different from western, or indeed Buddhist ways. A lot of digging will reveal a world that you would not realize as a pure tourist.

[tootall]

Get a copy of the book "Private Dancer". It will give you real incite into what a farang feels and a Thai bar girl feels and the lies and deceit that goes on. It is a must read for any farang to read before or when he thinks he has a relationship with a bar girl or free lancer in Thailand REAL

[Kenny202]

Get a copy of the book "Private Dancer". It will give you real incite into what a farang feels and a Thai bar girl feels and the lies and deceit that goes on. It is a must read for any farang to read before or when he thinks he has a relationship with a bar girl or free lancer in Thailand REAL

What was interesting about private dancer was the girl thought she was doing no wrong, and in her uneducated way she wasnt. Even though she had another man, as far as she was concerned when she was with Pete she was his 100%. Many do think like that. Some are just heartless mercenary scammers. It's a headfark! A very incite full and realistic read. I don't think I could read it again Edited March 26, 2016 by Kenny202

[uthaithanirules]

I'll just add my two-bits here (mostly through Thai Translation from Thai people):

1) There are plenty of jobs around. However, they only pay 9k/mo on average (BigC, 7/11, MK, etc. are always hiring). If you are lucky you can grab a 12k/mo job.

2) Most of the higher paying jobs require a degree (often any degree), and a lot of Thais and poor Thais do not have degrees, so can only get the 7k/mo job.

3) The thai girls who work bar/etc. are greedy (or their families are greedy). They want an iPhone, they want a Car, they want all that everyone else has. You can't get that with a 7k/mo salary.

4) When they get old, they seem to go work at massage shops (normal massage shops as they get older). Thai GF translated private conversations she had with many Thai masseuses (legitimate ones) who said they used to work bar and switched as they got older. My own conversations with these masseuses confirm that they are still looking for a Farlang husband (and sadly, one of my favourites found one and I lost out on a good deep tissue massage!!!!)

Personally, I don't feel bad for the girls who work bar, they HAVE options, they just choose to do what they do. I remember one older Thai mama-san who told me the girls want to work bar rather than work in office (even ones who have degree) because is easier to shake their bottom and make money than to work in office.

My one little bit of advice to all non-Thais: The Thai socio-economic-family structure is very odd and different from western, or indeed Buddhist ways. A lot of digging will reveal a world that you would not realize as a pure tourist.

1) The Thai family structure is different.

Thats a load of bull, its the same crap you get everywhere else. Money ALWAYS comes first, doesnt matter what family what country.

The richest ones in the village are the ones that ignore all theist and family rules. Mothers favour the sons, for the most part, but not always.

If the daughter is the main money earner, she is the head of the household, rest of the family cant do squat, becuase thats where all the money comes from.

Just because no one may say it out loud, to save face, doesnt mean any of it is really true

2) Only about 10% of the bar girls would make in the 100K+ baht range. The bottom 20% who cant get a salary would be earning Big C type wages - 10,000 a month. They are spending an extra 10000-30000 living in these tourist areas. So even mid range theres only 30,000/40,000 left after rent, travel, outfits, hair , makeup etc.

Most of them dont get there till after a kid in the village, then dumped by the boyfriend ~ 21/22 yrs old and over the hill by 27.

So, even the prettiest ones, its only about 6 yrs X 10 months ( minusing trips back home) X 70,000 after costs

Or roughly around 4 million baht maximum for around a 6 yr career.

Which if they are smart, and the family isnt a bunch of leeches, at most only really pays for 10 rai of land and a nice house, and then only if they save pretty much anything, and again thats top end

The not so successful girls, Salary 20000 a month, maybe another 20000 in tips, minus at least 10000 extra costs just staying there

6 yrs X 30000 net a month X 10 months = 2million baht for a 6 yr "career"

Its no where near as much as people think.

Then of course it may be 30 guys a month to get there, not just STDs they have to worry about, bacterial infections as well, most of them would have had salpingitis a few times and are infertile.

So close to 30, most of the money has gone anyway, off to work as a masseuse at Big C type wages, only the one child from before they started in bar. Then when too old to work as a masseuse ( carpel tunnel and arthritis hit early), back to the village with no income and not a big enough family to look after them.

This would be the fate of most of those bargirls. And thats if the dont get HIV

[rgs2001uk]

Get a copy of the book "Private Dancer". It will give you real incite into what a farang feels and a Thai bar girl feels and the lies and deceit that goes on. It is a must read for any farang to read before or when he thinks he has a relationship with a bar girl or free lancer in Thailand REAL

What was interesting about private dancer was the girl thought she was doing no wrong, and in her uneducated way she wasnt. Even though she had another man, as far as she was concerned when she was with Pete she was his 100%. Many do think like that. Some are just heartless mercenary scammers. It's a headfark! A very incite full and realistic read. I don't think I could read it again

I don't think I could read it again

Read it, no need to read it, come to Bkk and live it everyday, in the suburbs away from Lower Suk.

Woman up my way asked if she could talk to me, usual story looking for a husband.

The backstory, married to a Thai at about 16 upcountry, had a kid, Somchai did a runner, married another, he ferked off as well, 2 kids by the time she was 20.

History goes a bit obscured now, but somehow ended up in Pattaya (yeah sure working for Bangkok Bank Beach Rd branch).

Anyway married some farang who put her up on a pedestal and treated her like a princess.

Not enough, the farang couldnt support her emotional needs.

Gets a pua noi (some worthless Somchai who she pours money on).

Farang finds out and dumps her.

Somchai has no money supply, dumps her.

She is now living in a scuzzy 2,000 baht a month room in Bkk, earns about 9,000 baht per month in a hairdresser shop.

She is about 45 but looks about 60.

None of the Somchais up my way are interested in her, but she prays to Buddha every night to give her another farang so she can do the same again.

Another works in some delivery company, only because she can speak Engerlish, spends her money supporting a hammock swinger.

Not so long ago she was living like a Queen in suk soi 23.

Married to a worthless Somchai after the farang kicked her out, then Somchai kicked her out.

She lost about 10 kilos in weight and now pays a young Thai guy to service her.

[rgs2001uk]

Two more stories from the Suburbs while I remember them.

Young Italian guy (nice guy) meets up with a Thai bird, dont know how dont know where.

She leaves Bkk every morning at 5:30 goes and works in some factory in Ayuthaya, gets home about 7 in the evening, first thing she does is help her mother sell food to the plastic bag people of Bkk who buy food to eat at home.

Her grandmother sleeps upstairs looking after her 3 year old kid, who was never mentioned to Luigi on FB.

Luigi comes and has a look round soon susses it out, never seen of again.

Yai spends her days cursing farnags.

Never mind no decent Thai guy from a decent family wants anything to do with her.

Too be honest, its the usual story, the girl herself is a decent enough kid, its the baggage she brings with her..

Story #2.

Khun Kee Moh (ask you Thai better half to translate) was gobbing off about her new house the farang was going to build.

Decent lad, teacher or something like that from New Zealand, came here a couple of times.

The Somchais were living in a hovel, but teacher lad was going to build them a new house as way of sin sot, only 5 million baht.

Khun mair and por moved out the house and had it trashed, rented a house while the new one was being built.

Somewhere along the way something must have been lost in translation, teacher boy has never been seen again

The new house stands empty with nothing more than piles and weeds.

Khun mair and por live in a rented house wondering, what went wrong.

Not one Somchai is interested in the girl, she is seen as meu song.

[slipperylobster]

I caught mine cheating...

she tried to use some non-english word and got 40 points, the last scrabble game. She spelled handsome wrong.

[uthaithanirules]

Another big element to the equation, in the rural areas

Is that the guys that have a brain, and are prepared to work bugger off early to the big smoke to try make money.

There is a definate shortage of guys in that 17 to 50 year range back in whichever village, which has been going on for a long long time.

So these girls grow up, most of the males around are kids, teens and too many sleazy old uncles, god knows how often their fix sexual contact is with one of those sleazy old uncles

And used to trading for things with those teens guys there own age very early on

Which is the kind of thing that happens in many poor countries in the world.

But there is still something else going on in Thailand, something undefineable, something that still makes the girls act more like guys when it comes to sex. Its not poverty. Its not religion, girls from neighbouring countries wont act quite the same.

I still havent put my finger on it

Theres just something else going on, last country on earth to be if you expect a girl to be faithful.

And the once they get older, paying for a younger guy to give them attention thing, you have to worry about that all over the world. Its harsh to say, but the main thing preventing western woman doing it, they all get too fat and dont age well

[Kenny202]

Another big element to the equation, in the rural areas

Is that the guys that have a brain, and are prepared to work bugger off early to the big smoke to try make money.

There is a definate shortage of guys in that 17 to 50 year range back in whichever village, which has been going on for a long long time.

So these girls grow up, most of the males around are kids, teens and too many sleazy old uncles, god knows how often their fix sexual contact is with one of those sleazy old uncles

And used to trading for things with those teens guys there own age very early on

Which is the kind of thing that happens in many poor countries in the world.

But there is still something else going on in Thailand, something undefineable, something that still makes the girls act more like guys when it comes to sex. Its not poverty. Its not religion, girls from neighbouring countries wont act quite the same.

I still havent put my finger on it

Theres just something else going on, last country on earth to be if you expect a girl to be faithful.

And the once they get older, paying for a younger guy to give them attention thing, you have to worry about that all over the world. Its harsh to say, but the main thing preventing western woman doing it, they all get too fat and dont age well

the undefinable thing is the same as when you see some lunatic overtaking on a blind corner here. Just no reason or logic to it. I told my last girl she wasn't the same as a crap wife, she was like a crap husband. They can't be alone for more than 10 minutes Edited March 26, 2016 by Kenny202

[wow64]

Its only aaceptable for a poor girl to cheat if she is with or married to a "walking ATM" or "mine is different" guy.. This is for our entertainment purposes and makes for funny stories on Thaivisa and when with mates.

Like watching the train wreck..

Sent from my c64

[Dap]

Being poor has nothing to do with it IMO. there are plenty of poor people who don't f... for cash.

You're wrong, most in Thailand would, if offered the right amount of money, presented in the right way.

Ok then, how much do you want?

I agree with "a lot would", I am not sure about "most" though.

There is a cute cop girl I know in my soi, married to another cop. How much do you reckon I should offer her? Maybe you could ask her for me. I am a bit shy.

How much do you fancy "suicide"

[TuskegeeBen]

And Farangs are always on this forum, debating the IQ level of Thai people! Huh?

Of the 141 previous replies to present topic thread, I'm curious to know the percentage number of university graduates, who actually posted a direct, "on-topic" reply ?

Sigh

Edited March 29, 2016 by TuskegeeBen

[rgs2001uk]

And Farangs are always on this forum, debating the IQ level of Thai people! Huh?

Of the 141 previous replies to present topic thread, I'm curious to know the percentage number of university graduates, who actually posted a direct, "on-topic" reply ?

Sigh

I am more curious to know, of how many who replied, actually live here full time, not those who work overseas and come on holiday.

How many can actually speak read and write Thai?

And if not why not?

[rgs2001uk]

And Farangs are always on this forum, debating the IQ level of Thai people! Huh?

Of the 141 previous replies to present topic thread, I'm curious to know the percentage number of university graduates, who actually posted a direct, "on-topic" reply ?

Sigh

Indeed outsmarted by a girl with no more than a P4 education.