Pierre, a brave French fighter pilot, takes his girlfriend, Marie, out for a pleasant little picnic by the River Seine. It's a beautiful day and love is in the air.

Marie leans over to Pierre and says: 'Pierre, kiss me!' Our hero grabs a bottle of Merlot and splashes it on Marie's lips.

'What are you doing, Pierre?', says the startled Marie.

'I am Pierre the fighter pilot! When I have red meat, I like to have red wine!

She smiles and they start kissing. When things began to heat up a little, Marie says, 'Pierre, kiss me lower.'

Our hero tears her blouse open, grabs a bottle of Chardonnay and starts pouring it all over her breasts.

'Pierre! What are you doing?', asks the bewildered Marie.

'I am Pierre the fighter pilot! When I have white meat, I like to have white wine!'

They resume their passionate interlude and things really steam up.

Marie leans close to his ear and whispers, 'Pierre, kiss me lower!'

Our hero rips off her underwear, grabs a bottle of Cognac and pours it in her lap. He then strikes a match and lights it on fire.

Marie shrieks and dives into the river. Standing waist deep, Marie throws her arms upwards and screams furiously, 'PIERRE, WHAT IN THE hel_l DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?'

Our hero stands up, defiantly, and says, 'I am Pierre the fighter pilot! When I go down, I go down in flames!'

, a brave French fighter pilot,

You are taking the p1ss

, a brave French fighter pilot,

You are taking the p1ss

this is the jokes section isn't it?

Bluddy exellent, thanks for that one. I am one of a bunch of Brits working for PetroVietnam as PMC with a consortium led by a French contractor. We need all the French jokes we can get (well, in addition to the ones loitering around the office).

i first heard this joke from my gf (at the time) about 15years ago - she did it with a brilliant French accent and drew the joke out a little more than the one above... absolutely funny as h3ll! almost wet myself... alas the online version is good, but not as good as her version!