laobali

She obviously has a sense of style, stainless steel garden sala? Bamboo

And tradition. Why do many urban westerners like 'roughing it' occasionally, sleeping outdoors under canvas, making log fires or using barbecues to cook on? Because it's nostalgic and there's an ambience. Would you rather relax on a hot day in a sala under grass thatch with rough wooden or bamboo poles and a railing to support your back with cushions on the floor with a mat - or sit on a plastic chair at a collapsible table on a concrete floor with an iron roof and bright fluorescent light (like so many eateries in Thailand and Laos)? You could have a small one in the garden too. I know which I'd prefer. Agree 100% with your wife on this one.

I can go on like this but i won't....you have to accept that this is a 3rd world country and they have never learned to do things properly.

Ah yes the white mans burden, bloody natives cant do anything properly...

At least they tried to learn within a reasonable amount of time in some of our former colonies.

Drip, drip, no lump sums, no "investments", rent, don't buy, no houses, no land, no business opportunities, all money brought in is considered spent that moment it is converted into baht, no loans only gifts.

This philosophy has served me well over 2 decades in Thailand. Expect nothing and you will not be disappointed. Invest nothing and you will (probably) not be ripped off.

Great stuff and spot on. Buy nothing, buy your own drinks, anything you need rent it. look after yourself. I never even buy a girl a drink. Why should I ? They get the drink, ok thats fair enough then you get charged 120 baht for a small galls of fruit juice and another 60 baht on top for her to put in her pocket, eeerrrrmmmm hello!

Give then as little as possible, and never trust any of them. ZERO

Can you really be a happy man with a mindset like that – in Thailand or anywhere else?

I see a Japanese sign on the gate.

Probably his restaurant, but with thai 51% share. She may have snatched it away from him.

A warning to all about the 51% control of business, even if said thai did not contribute one baht.

Now they want 51% share and full control of board members.the noose is tightening around foreigners and most will move elsewhere.

Noose. Very apt!

No law broken, but it's news because it's an American.

It's only news because there's invariably a Thai press photographer on the scene within seconds of an incident where police presence is required. Wonder how that happens?

Seeing that British subjects are involved, the British government should should look at all the evidence ( or lack of it ) and make an objection in the strongest terms and insist on being directly involved with an independant DNA test using sample that I believe the British must surely have ( fend or please ) If this fails the only meaningful and effective protest left open to the people who really and truly are genuinely committed to truth and justice in this case, is to boycott Thailand by staying away from there. Go to a country where there is justice with better personal safety records, where you're not likely to get raped and murdered by a psychopathic maniac who is left to go free to do it again.

That would rule out most of Southeast Asia!

^ Agreed. They all need money for things and know they pay through the nose for loans from lenders, but loans within the 'family' are unlikely to ever be repaid.

Everyone's experience is different.

In my extended Thai Family network, I've never seen a Baht lent that was later 'forgiven or forgotten'.

Heck, I've even borrowed from the future FiL ...

Having seen many of your posts, you seem to have "landed with your bum in the butter" with your Thai family. Many here would think you're in a minority. Hope your good luck continues.

^ Agreed. They all need money for things and know they pay through the nose for loans from lenders, but loans within the 'family' are unlikely to ever be repaid.

"Some are lucky, some are not (especially farang with Thai wives)
Just be thankful for what you've got."

...and hope like hell it lasts.

I hope the real twist in this travesty will arrive when the British forensics ask for his sample and at the same time the Thai police have no idea that Heathers body produced another sample back in the UK after repatriation. This is the only thing that can prove this case now. If our far more advanced forensic experts have somehow managed to get a DNA sample of her murderers the

This would be a great development -

I hope the Thais haven't scrubbed the victim (female) completely clean of evidence and some micro level evidence was there- and taken.

Its very likely the Brits would have ordered a very top level forensic examination once she made UK soil.

It would really (As the Equalizer said) If the Thais Co-operate and pass on a sample , or they have one already and its a match - that would be SH*T hitting the fan-

I was coming on to post similar. The only way I'd now believe ANYTHING the Thai authorities claim on this case is if it were independently verified. It wouldn't have to be by the British authorities either, U.S., French, German or a multitude of others would satisfy me. Having witnessed this charade which the Thais claim as an investigation, the North Koreans or ISIS would probably be more convincing.

Except they wouldn't bother as their priorities are not tourism.

Wow! That was incredibly cold-blooded. I hope they catch this guy and fry him.

Maybe 'oneday', but probably not today...

What a country! Peaceful loving people.

Oh get off it! This happens in every country.

Not so many where a professional hit man could do his job in broad daylight in front of witnesses, then casually ride off. Untouchable?

Look in general if we see a drunken man spouting of and being a nuisance the vast majority of people will ignore him or tell him to go away. If there are a few of you and he gets rowdy, a little extra persuasion is sometimes necessary it is called proportionate actions. One skinny drunken man getting stuck in the sand to me would be quite a spectacle and if i say so quite amusing. Now irrespective of what he has said, putting the man in a comma is not proportionate to the situation these Thai lads may have encountered with this skinny drunken man on the beach. This is the problem here these idiots will try and kill you over nothing.

That's when a "comma" becomes a "full stop".

This RTP (NPO) investigation we are told has been completed and is now the domain of the Public Prosecutor. If this be so, why then this piece of reporting quoted in part...

"...However, the NPO told the NHRC that investigation into the case was already in the hands of the public prosecutors and that it needed to seek prior approval from the prosecutors before providing any details on the case to the NHRC".

"Meanwhile, the Koh Samui Court yesterday approved a police request that the suspects' detention be extended by another 12 days, as more time was needed to complete the investigation".

Now which is to be BIB, either you have completed the investigation or you have not? Or is this a case of 'grasping at straws' so as to stitch these two guys up?

Neither. I can tell you from experience there is no 'Law' here. They just make stuff up as they go along. Remember, they're a tribe playing at being a nation.

Tribal law applies to everyone in it, including the head.

Clearly if the interrogation of the alleged suspects had gone on without violence, then the cops would be falling over themselves to go to the NHRC and willingly testify. That they choose to ignore it speaks volumes.

Are we about to see some new scapegoats, ones in uniforms?

Or maybe a new suspect(s)?

System A doesn't work because...

System B can't work because...

System C won't work because...

System D might work except for...

Thailand is ungovernable because of...

Corruption.

fosseway, on 25 Oct 2014 - 21:00, said:

Just noticed something on your last post how241 Quote, Can you take off your shirt etc. I always thought that a woman wore a blouse. Is this a wind up?

I thought the very same thing when I read it!

Maybe it's a brown check shirt?

The OP does not say how long he has been in Thailand....but it does take some time (forever for some things) to really catch on to the nuances of the society, especially if one is in the rural areas. I have been here 10+ years and some days it seems like I stepped off the airplane yesterday.

As described, I think the OP handled things pretty well. One of the understandings my wife and I have is that when things like this happen, I need her to take a bit of time to explain to me <deleted> just happened/is happening.

Learning at least some basics of the Thai language will certainly help.

Re: "farang"...it is just a word, let it go...

So you have been here 10 years good how Good is your thai I have been here of and on for 6 years and I try to lean thai and my thai is very good of what Thai people tell me and I am just saying it is not a good word and it is about time thailand get with the real world I have told my thai I not like it and she understands were I am coming from so why can't peopl out there think the same as her on this forum but not saying all of you are but some of you would like the word <deleted> .

Grow up - you are making yourself look a prat!

Farang is a common word used generically to reference a western foreigner. You quickly get used to being referred to as a Farang when someone is speaking to your wife about "Your Farang".

It is only offensive when used offensively - that would usually be in Pattaya and maybe Bangkok.

Me grow I am grown up you get a life and lean a bit about it on the way it is not a thai word ok it was mad up so grow and lean a bit about thailand before you open your mouth

You could concentrate on improving your written English instead of going off the deep end about the word 'farang' which is accepted by most of us as it's not used offensively all the time. And even when it is, so what?

Thanks for all the replies.

To start off...i am not into drugs and as far as alcohol is concerned, i am a social drinker only. No alcohol in the house, this because i do not need it nor long for it.

Have done alot of introspection related to my life and myself in the last years. Many times very confronting. Especially about the negative sides ofcourse. Some posters have mentioned...the underlying causes. I have tried to honestly search for those myself. Which natural, negative, aspects, instinct behaviour, have always come back from childhood onwards ? I have found those aspects. Only the....why....i am in doubt about that.

Other posters have written that only ONESELF can change it. I agree with that but i cannot finish it alone i have concluded. I need someone to help me overcome the last couple of hurdles. I do not prefer, ignorantly maybe, to use medication with that. The change must come from within, is best i believe.

Without feeling the need to go into, poster AOA mentioned my familysituation. It on 1 way for sure has not helped me but in another way it has helped to focus me to work on myself. This as on the other side nothing is forthcoming so this means now that only i can change it. For me the fight is worth it. Time will prove the outcome.

Thanks again.

The correct medication (not all anti-depressants will work for everybody) will trigger the positive response that does come from within. I subscribe to the 'chemical imbalance in ther brain' theory because it worked for me. I have had several bouts of depression beginning in my forties. Relationship as well as income problems caused the buildup. After discussing it with my UK doctor he suggested either psychotherapy and/or medication. I chose the latter as I wanted to come out of it without a third party. I went on to Prozac (fluoxetine - available cheaply OTC in Thailand and Laos) and within a fortnight I could feel a difference in attitude, allowing ME to open the door to the future again. Within a few more weeks I was a different person and my life improved dramatically after that. It's simply the way you look at things. Nothing else really changes. There were some minor side-effects, but nothing too difficult to manage. After a few months of taking the same dosage every day (this can be established by starting at 20mg, waiting 10 days to see signs of improvement and increasing if necessary). The nice thing about this type of med is that it doesn't give an instant fix (high). It adjusts your serotonin level gradually. When I felt the time was right, I wanted to stop taking it; simple as that. Things were much better for me for several years. Occasionally I felt the need again. Same thing, this time self-treatment (in Thailand). Two or three months later I was okay again. All in all about four bouts in 20 years. Been clear for over a year this time.

Not saying this is what you need or that it will work, just that it did for me - with no big downside. Best not to drink alcohol while on it, can make you hyper.

Good luck whatever you decide to do.

Before you diagnose yourself with depression, or low self-esteem, first make sure that you are not, in fact, just surrounded by ass- holes. - Sigmund Freud

And where do you go if you find that you really are?

Ohhh....honesty and the truth are not universal then ?

In a word, no - not in the real world.

How long have you lived in Thailand?

7 years in Thailand, 1 in Bali and 8 in Laos. Truth and honesty are not the same. Belief comes into it.

Fair enough. At least you have a well rounded background to base your decisions on.

Thanks, and for what it's worth, several other continents and countries before that. I base my decisions on my own experiences and personal relationships. They are different for everybody. Luck comes into it. Some people seem to be naturally luckier than others. I am living in a different environment now (out of Asia) and am happier for it. There are happy singles, couples and families in every country of the world.

Edit: I should add there are plenty of unhappy ones too! While it's not necessarily the culture/religions/beliefs of people of the country that is the cause, trying to reconcile the differences between two people of different backgrounds can be difficult. Those who cannot should probably separate.

It seems, and experienced it myself regularly, that some thai women dont know when a white lie is needed or not. Not telling the truth is like a national sport. Never trust a person who lies to you.

That's a bit harsh. I'd say never fully trust someone who has lied to you. You're both better off.

Depends on which kind of relationship one holds with the other.

I don't think it does. No one is perfect. Wishing this were true can even lead to depression.

Ohhh....honesty and the truth are not universal then ?

In a word, no - not in the real world.

How long have you lived in Thailand?

7 years in Thailand, 1 in Bali and 8 in Laos. Truth and honesty are not the same. Belief comes into it.

"When asked about international concerns over the investigation, Mr. Thawatchai said that Thai police will be able to answer every doubt raised but no outside authorities can send their people to work on this case as Thai laws do not permit such a scenario."

The answers the BIB give to every doubt is the cause of international concern.

As to what Thai laws allow, you might want to check with the PM about that, as Burmese and UK police are coming over/already here to look at the case.

"You can look but don't touch anything!"

You're beginning to see the light, but it's still heavily shaded. If she had told you the truth (really, you only have her version of things) mightn't you have walked away?

If she told me "I have a bf in Germany, but I'm not sure about him" I'd still see the girl and approach the situation accordingly.

She (Thai woman) doesn't think the same as you (farang). Apart from generalisations you are two individuals. There is no right answer.

Ohhh....honesty and the truth are not universal then ?

In a word, no - not in the real world.