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That's what syphilis will do to you... Donald Trump Syphilis Rumors: Doctors Weigh In (newsweek.com)

The latest Ikea assembly instructions.

I was sitting at a red light yesterday, minding my own business and patiently waiting for it to turn green, even though there was no oncoming traffic. A carload of young and very loud red necks, with a Confederate flag duct-taped on the trunk of their car, and a "guns 'n Jesus" slogan spray painted on the side, was stopped next to me. Suddenly one did a screaming rebel yell, fired his gun in the air and the car took off before the light changed. Out of nowhere an 18-wheeler came speeding through the intersection and ran directly over their car, crushing it completely and killing everyone in it. For several minutes I sat in my car thinking to myself, "Man....that could have been me!" So today, bright and early, I went out and got a job as a truck driver.