The week that was in Thailand news: Why Thais don’t need to find their inner child.

[rooster59]

The week that was in Thailand news: Why Thais don’t need to find their inner child.

 

 

Arriving in Thailand it very quickly dawned on me that Thais are like children. Though they appear to grow old like the rest of us they never quite manage to grow up.

But the realization also came to me before I was wet behind the ears from my first monsoon that the fact that they remain in a permanent state of infancy is one of the factors that makes them so pleasant to be around.

The humor seemed puerile. The cajolery of the streets, especially in the mild farang baiting that most white honkies are subject to, barely seemed out of slapstick dungarees. The knowledge of the world – and their understanding of it – seemed about the level of Year 3 at primary school. On a good day.

While I consider myself as more of an outsider looking in than someone who has embraced Thai culture to the point of abandoning my upbringing, I have nevertheless retained the humor of a seven year old.

Like most Britons I will always find the passing of wind uproariously amusing.

The missus seems a little serious when interacting with our very young children – I often tell her she needs to lighten up as, after all, the rain won’t kill them, Paracetamol cannot cure the common cold and who cares if we are a bit rude behind people’s backs.

For such pronouncements and similar behavior I am castigated as a 56 year old man who knows nothing, has little responsibility and has never grown up.

As a Thai resident I take it as a compliment.

This week in the Thai news we were treated to ample evidence that the Thais may have grown out of Pampers but have replaced incontinence with inconsistency. They may be sixty or even seventy something but their hearts – and dare I say minds – have remained in the limbo of the little people.

They carry on with the oblivion of the young aforethought, expecting grown-ups of other nationalities to take them at face value and their own “phee-nongs” to obey, follow suit and understand their actions without question.

Such are the pleasures of living in Thailand though I could just as easily appreciate that there are many who never come to terms with it and remain bewildered and befuddled by the sheer childishness of it all.

Once again Pattaya or QUOTES (The Queen of the Eastern Seaboard) led the way in the puerility stakes. A TAT rep asked us to believe that the resort was wallowing in a glut of tourists as thick as the sludge on a bad day at Bali Hai.

Her maths was off but hey, children – remember in Thailand that the teacher is always right!

How much more refreshing it was to hear the man from the hoteliers association give us a frank assessment and treat us like adults – I had to do a double take that he was Thai especially as he appeared without a tie and the metaphorical white coat that the locals believe lends credibility to those speaking in public.

Our lady at the TAT had clearly been taking lessons from Khun Kobkarn at tourism and sports. The minister, incidentally, was chairman of the board of governors at a well-known school that I helped to set up and always gave the impression she was addressing Year 1, who let’s face it will believe anything.

Her related underling had come up with the idea to promote the resort to “hi-end” women to keep the tourist dollars flooding in. The translator used the words “cunning plan” for the childlike notion that women standing up playing golf could save the day rather than the more familiar Pattaya ones lying down offering the 19th Hole after a round of drinks in Walking Street.

That cunning plan line was lifted straight out of TV’s Blackadder – a comic figure as childish as could be led by his hapless underling Baldrick who always put the J in juvenile.

Meanwhile General P, our father that art in khaki hallowed be his name, must have been upset that the prosecutors had decided to drop the case against Yingluck for causing the flooding of 2011.

Ok, it was dereliction of duty in the aftermath that she got away with, but methinks they have got more than enough on her and her relatives without resorting to charges of causing natural disasters.

But the same could be said of presenter Sorrayuth who had barely got a taste for rice gruel before he was bailed while appealing his 136 million baht embezzling conviction.

So what did he tell the massed reporters as emerged from clink to smell the relative sweet air of a Bangkok morning?

“I miss my mum”.

Another Thai who has no need to search for his inner child.

Also behaving like children – but who hopefully will face a spot of detention if not deportation - were the bikers in Surin who went to intimidate a UK ex-policeman who runs the appropriately named “Monkey House”.

The forum foamed at the mouth with one camp calling the bikers pussies and posting pictures of the Village People in drag, and the other, perhaps looking up from their Yakusa comics, saying they were hard nuts who would make Kim Jong Un nervous.

Former fuzz Lee told me he was more concerned for his wife than his 18 stitches.

We’ll see just fines in the coming days but the uniforms in town will smile a lot and be firm beneath their ingratiating veneer that should the bikers step out of line again they will find out who are the real mahouts in elephant town.

Once again it was a bad week for going on balconies. A Russian in Pattaya was the latest tourist to say “do svidaniya” to her sixth floor apartment and hello to the car park while a former top cop tumbled from a parking lot to his fate ten floors below in Bangkok.

Rooster is the antithesis of conspiracy theorist tiring of posters who see mystery in people falling off buildings. Personally, I see drunkenness, illness, stupidity and low railings being the lethal cocktail that ends so many lives.

As an inspector of accommodation on school trips I was aghast at some of the low balcony walls at hotels. These were just teens not fully grown adults, and were very unlikely to be able to get a drink with beady eyed Rooster on the prowl. Yet I saw danger everywhere.

Such situations reminded me of the guy who fitted a ceiling fan at a condo I was staying in. I’m only about 5 foot ten but he had installed the blades to cut through the air – and our necks – at about five foot six.

He seemed genuinely quite put out when told to raise it another foot by those finicky too tall farang!

Continuing the theme of children and their games was the Buddhist organization that took umbrage at a Taiwanese company’s video game that featured “Jesus vs Buddha”.

Being a devout atheist I usually keep religion out of the column but, as some posters pointed out, with one protagonist who must show the other cheek and the other believing in non-violence the denouement should have been as wussy as those Surin bikers.

Still at least the titter-worthy tagline for the game gave us the best comment of the week:

“The son of God is back…..and he’s cross”.

Ending the life of a child – a baby in actual fact – was the driver in Suphanburi who police said they will charge with murder after he went the wrong way round a bend straight into another pick-up.

The sickening road carnage is all the more disgusting when completely innocent people come up against these nutters. For it was clear that after an argument with relatives the miscreant got drunk and continued behind the wheel in a Thai tizzy.

Let’s hope they can make the homicide charge stick not just for the memory of the six month old life  he took, but all our sakes.

And so to this week’s Rooster awards continuing my juvenile theme.

Firstly the “Kindergarten Awareness Prize” goes to the UK’s Alex, 21, a round the bend, sorry, world cyclist who said that she’ll survive the Thai roads as she is keeping to the edge.

No one will be surprised if next week we are reading how another barmy bicyclist failed to beat the odds and get home after trying to traverse the tricky “thanons” of Thailand.

The “Best Project in Year One” award goes to all those government spokesmen and excise folks for their excellent work in making everything clear on the cigarette and booze tax hikes that came in at the weekend.

Talk about the blind leading the blind drunk.

While my “Year Three Compromise in Public Office” award goes to those at Pattaya City Hall who first told the complaining proletariat to shut up and thereafter kowtowed in the mother of all U-turns that saw salvation for the Dolphin Roundabout, latest wonder of the modern world.

Quite some flip for flipper.

Finally the “Back to School” award clearly must go to the more than 300 Bangkok cops – or 10 % of entrants - who failed their law exams on what constitutes a basic traffic violation in the capital.

Having lived and driven a motorcycle in Krung Thep for the best part of four decades there was clearly some skullduggery in the tests.

Surely 90% would fail.



Rooster.

 

 

 

-- © Copyright Thai Visa News 2017-09-17

[The manic]

5555

[MartinL]

In keeping with the theme of 'juvenile humour', it's a relief that the translator spoke about the underling's "cunning plan" rather than her "cunning stunt".

[maeab101]

Rain will make you sick. If it fall on you.

[madmitch]

I always thought that this song relates to both the people of Thailand and most of its expats! Seems you agree.

 

 

[lonewolf99]

I thought I was harsh branding the locals as 8 year olds in adult bodies Rooster has dropped them a year to 7.....

 

btw The Dolphin roundabout is not a roundabout, as it is blocked off so you can do manic deadly U turns 500 mtrs away to come back to where you wanted to turn in the first place. It should be replaced with the standard 4 way traffic lights with one set of lights only having the green light for 12 seconds. (as per the norm).

 

So awarding the locals for keeping something that does not function as it should just fuels their incompetence.

[mikebell]

You've gotta laugh;  the alternative, thinking seriously about Thai mores, doesn't bear thinking about.

[spidermike007]

A fascinating editorial. Was it written by a Thai? Alot of what was said is spot on. It sometimes does feel like a lot of Thais, especially many of the men, never really mature beyond 13 years old. Especially when it comes to issues pertaining to manhood, self worth, self esteem, the pathological fear of losing face (who cares what others think of you? I means not one iota, really), the appearance of being wrong, the relationship with truth, taking responsibility for problems you have created, etc. 

 

In my opinion, on a lot of levels, many Thai women are far, far more mature. Yet, many are undeveloped when it comes to emotions, the true expression of love, or dealing with issues within a relationship, or communication. 

 

 

[sawadee1947]

the kind of humor I like. Well done! Thank you

[Blue bruce]

Rooster, never at  loss for words.

[mikosan]

Right up to scratch, as usual.

 

[thongplay]

On 16/09/2017 at 3:48 PM, rooster59 said:

The “Best Project in Year One” award goes to all those government spokesmen and excise folks for their excellent work in making everything clear on the cigarette and booze tax hikes that came in at the weekend.

I reported in another forum post yesterday (Saturday) how I tried to stock up on beer and cigarettes from our usual shops but one was completely locked up and the other wouldn't sell anything until the new price information was received.

 

But today (Sunday) I walked to our little local shop and bought Spy wine cooler for the same price I have paid all year!

 

Maybe that tax price hike information hasn't been clearly disseminated yet?

[phantomfiddler]

They walk amongst us ! Years ago I went for 5 weeks with not a drop of water coming through the city main supply. After many complaints, an "engineer" came out and said "I can see the problem. Your water meter is not big enough" ! When you put this in the correct context, ie there are many Thais in high positions of responsibility, this is nothing other than terrifying !

[wakeupplease]

1 hour ago, thongplay said:

I reported in another forum post yesterday (Saturday) how I tried to stock up on beer and cigarettes from our usual shops but one was completely locked up and the other wouldn't sell anything until the new price information was received.

 

But today (Sunday) I walked to our little local shop and bought Spy wine cooler for the same price I have paid all year!

 

Maybe that tax price hike information hasn't been clearly disseminated yet?

Spy wine cooler

 

That stuff puts me on the toilet what the hell is in it, would not drink it if it was free.

[Stevemercer]

I reckon the average Thai woman is more mature, being burdened down with kids and the practicalities of life.

 

But I think most behave like teenagers.

[MartinL]

27 minutes ago, phantomfiddler said:

They walk amongst us ! Years ago I went for 5 weeks with not a drop of water coming through the city main supply. After many complaints, an "engineer" came out and said "I can see the problem. Your water meter is not big enough" ! When you put this in the correct context, ie there are many Thais in high positions of responsibility, this is nothing other than terrifying !

Ha! One of our toilets, which had been working well for a couple of years since installation, suddenly started to overflow when flushed. My wife called a bloke in and I expected him to jet the waste pipe or run a sanny-snake down it. Nothing of the sort - he told Mrs.L that the cistern was too big, water couldn't get away quickly enough and that we'd need a new, smaller cistern. I told him "Thanks and goodbye" and cleared the blockage myself, vowing never to rely on small town Thai tradesmen ever again. Maybe they're OK in big cities but here - complete waste of time.

 

 

[Sumarianson]

My experience of Thai women is that they always want something especially from a farang. They assume far too much and have no negotation skills whatsoever. Their childish behaviour is so bewildering coming from an adult. 

They really don't live in the now and appreciate it, but live somewhere in the future where things will be perfect. It seems as though no matter how much of life they live they cannot accept their present as the life that they are living.

Has anyone else had similar experiences?

Edited September 17, 2017 by Sumarianson
Missing word

[heybuz]

8 minutes ago, Sumarianson said:

My experience of Thai women is that they always want something especially from a farang. They assume far too much and have no negotation skills whatsoever. Their childish behaviour is so bewildering coming from an adult. 

They really don't live in the now and appreciate it, but live somewhere in the future where things will be perfect. It seems as though no matter how much of life they live they cannot accept their present as the life that they are living.

Has anyone else had similar experiences?

Yes

[George FmplesdaCosteedback]

9 hours ago, heybuz said:

Yes

9 hours ago, Sumarianson said:

My experience of Thai women is that they always want something especially from a farang. They assume far too much and have no negotation skills whatsoever. Their childish behaviour is so bewildering coming from an adult. 

They really don't live in the now and appreciate it, but live somewhere in the future where things will be perfect. It seems as though no matter how much of life they live they cannot accept their present as the life that they are living.

Has anyone else had similar experiences?

It is about the "next life".

[Odysseus123]

10 hours ago, Sumarianson said:

My experience of Thai women is that they always want something especially from a farang. They assume far too much and have no negotation skills whatsoever. Their childish behaviour is so bewildering coming from an adult. 

They really don't live in the now and appreciate it, but live somewhere in the future where things will be perfect. It seems as though no matter how much of life they live they cannot accept their present as the life that they are living.

Has anyone else had similar experiences?

Yes.Tho' you only really get to "negotiate" after they have had a radical I-phone or smart phone surgical removal anyway.

[wakeupplease]

1 hour ago, Odysseus123 said:

Yes.Tho' you only really get to "negotiate" after they have had a radical I-phone or smart phone surgical removal anyway.

surgical removal anyway

 

Surely you meant implant and not removal.

[Odysseus123]

45 minutes ago, wakeupplease said:

surgical removal anyway

 

Surely you meant implant and not removal.

Nope, I meant that before you can have an intelligent conversation with them (if that is at all possible) the highly addictive,screen gazing,digit distracting,forever chirping,hive mind connecting instrument of mass stupidity must be somehow removed as painlessly as possible.

 

But...that is when your problems may really start.

[YetAnother]

On 9/16/2017 at 3:48 PM, rooster59 said:

Talk about the blind leading the blind drunk.

one of the keys to maximizing your thai living experience: adjust your expectations; down

[bazza73]

I like Thais fine the way they are. Be careful what you wish for.

[George FmplesdaCosteedback]

20 hours ago, Odysseus123 said:

Nope, I meant that before you can have an intelligent conversation with them (if that is at all possible) the highly addictive,screen gazing,digit distracting,forever chirping,hive mind connecting instrument of mass stupidity must be somehow removed as painlessly as possible.

 

But...that is when your problems may really start.

Hi Ody,

(Sorry about my little but amusing spelling mistake.)

I great comment, you should have a quick look at the thread about "Are people that use smart phones smarter".

Cheers, G

 

[Odysseus123]

3 hours ago, George FmplesdaCosteedback said:

Hi Ody,

(Sorry about my little but amusing spelling mistake.)

I great comment, you should have a quick look at the thread about "Are people that use smart phones smarter".

Cheers, G

 

Hi George,

I just had a look at it;life is far,far too short my friend.Hmmm.. there's a thought...reincarnation as a Samsung Galaxy XXII ?

 

Back on topic..

[George FmplesdaCosteedback]

18 hours ago, Odysseus123 said:

Hi George,

I just had a look at it;life is far,far too short my friend.Hmmm.. there's a thought...reincarnation as a Samsung Galaxy XXII ?

 

Back on topic..

You are right again. I've given up arguing with them.

Not worth the time as you say.

555 yes reincarnation as a Motorola (see picture)

Whoops another mistake, that should have been "One great comment"

Ah, the amber nectar is going down well... 

PS. How's your medical problems?

Edited September 19, 2017 by George FmplesdaCosteedback

[joeyg]

On 9/16/2017 at 3:48 PM, rooster59 said:

The week that was in Thailand news: Why Thais don’t need to find their inner child.

 

 

Arriving in Thailand it very quickly dawned on me that Thais are like children. Though they appear to grow old like the rest of us they never quite manage to grow up.

But the realization also came to me before I was wet behind the ears from my first monsoon that the fact that they remain in a permanent state of infancy is one of the factors that makes them so pleasant to be around.

The humor seemed puerile. The cajolery of the streets, especially in the mild farang baiting that most white honkies are subject to, barely seemed out of slapstick dungarees. The knowledge of the world – and their understanding of it – seemed about the level of Year 3 at primary school. On a good day.

While I consider myself as more of an outsider looking in than someone who has embraced Thai culture to the point of abandoning my upbringing, I have nevertheless retained the humor of a seven year old.

Like most Britons I will always find the passing of wind uproariously amusing.

The missus seems a little serious when interacting with our very young children – I often tell her she needs to lighten up as, after all, the rain won’t kill them, Paracetamol cannot cure the common cold and who cares if we are a bit rude behind people’s backs.

For such pronouncements and similar behavior I am castigated as a 56 year old man who knows nothing, has little responsibility and has never grown up.

As a Thai resident I take it as a compliment.

This week in the Thai news we were treated to ample evidence that the Thais may have grown out of Pampers but have replaced incontinence with inconsistency. They may be sixty or even seventy something but their hearts – and dare I say minds – have remained in the limbo of the little people.

They carry on with the oblivion of the young aforethought, expecting grown-ups of other nationalities to take them at face value and their own “phee-nongs” to obey, follow suit and understand their actions without question.

Such are the pleasures of living in Thailand though I could just as easily appreciate that there are many who never come to terms with it and remain bewildered and befuddled by the sheer childishness of it all.

Once again Pattaya or QUOTES (The Queen of the Eastern Seaboard) led the way in the puerility stakes. A TAT rep asked us to believe that the resort was wallowing in a glut of tourists as thick as the sludge on a bad day at Bali Hai.

Her maths was off but hey, children – remember in Thailand that the teacher is always right!

How much more refreshing it was to hear the man from the hoteliers association give us a frank assessment and treat us like adults – I had to do a double take that he was Thai especially as he appeared without a tie and the metaphorical white coat that the locals believe lends credibility to those speaking in public.

Our lady at the TAT had clearly been taking lessons from Khun Kobkarn at tourism and sports. The minister, incidentally, was chairman of the board of governors at a well-known school that I helped to set up and always gave the impression she was addressing Year 1, who let’s face it will believe anything.

Her related underling had come up with the idea to promote the resort to “hi-end” women to keep the tourist dollars flooding in. The translator used the words “cunning plan” for the childlike notion that women standing up playing golf could save the day rather than the more familiar Pattaya ones lying down offering the 19th Hole after a round of drinks in Walking Street.

That cunning plan line was lifted straight out of TV’s Blackadder – a comic figure as childish as could be led by his hapless underling Baldrick who always put the J in juvenile.

Meanwhile General P, our father that art in khaki hallowed be his name, must have been upset that the prosecutors had decided to drop the case against Yingluck for causing the flooding of 2011.

Ok, it was dereliction of duty in the aftermath that she got away with, but methinks they have got more than enough on her and her relatives without resorting to charges of causing natural disasters.

But the same could be said of presenter Sorrayuth who had barely got a taste for rice gruel before he was bailed while appealing his 136 million baht embezzling conviction.

So what did he tell the massed reporters as emerged from clink to smell the relative sweet air of a Bangkok morning?

“I miss my mum”.

Another Thai who has no need to search for his inner child.

Also behaving like children – but who hopefully will face a spot of detention if not deportation - were the bikers in Surin who went to intimidate a UK ex-policeman who runs the appropriately named “Monkey House”.

The forum foamed at the mouth with one camp calling the bikers pussies and posting pictures of the Village People in drag, and the other, perhaps looking up from their Yakusa comics, saying they were hard nuts who would make Kim Jong Un nervous.

Former fuzz Lee told me he was more concerned for his wife than his 18 stitches.

We’ll see just fines in the coming days but the uniforms in town will smile a lot and be firm beneath their ingratiating veneer that should the bikers step out of line again they will find out who are the real mahouts in elephant town.

Once again it was a bad week for going on balconies. A Russian in Pattaya was the latest tourist to say “do svidaniya” to her sixth floor apartment and hello to the car park while a former top cop tumbled from a parking lot to his fate ten floors below in Bangkok.

Rooster is the antithesis of conspiracy theorist tiring of posters who see mystery in people falling off buildings. Personally, I see drunkenness, illness, stupidity and low railings being the lethal cocktail that ends so many lives.

As an inspector of accommodation on school trips I was aghast at some of the low balcony walls at hotels. These were just teens not fully grown adults, and were very unlikely to be able to get a drink with beady eyed Rooster on the prowl. Yet I saw danger everywhere.

Such situations reminded me of the guy who fitted a ceiling fan at a condo I was staying in. I’m only about 5 foot ten but he had installed the blades to cut through the air – and our necks – at about five foot six.

He seemed genuinely quite put out when told to raise it another foot by those finicky too tall farang!

Continuing the theme of children and their games was the Buddhist organization that took umbrage at a Taiwanese company’s video game that featured “Jesus vs Buddha”.

Being a devout atheist I usually keep religion out of the column but, as some posters pointed out, with one protagonist who must show the other cheek and the other believing in non-violence the denouement should have been as wussy as those Surin bikers.

Still at least the titter-worthy tagline for the game gave us the best comment of the week:

“The son of God is back…..and he’s cross”.

Ending the life of a child – a baby in actual fact – was the driver in Suphanburi who police said they will charge with murder after he went the wrong way round a bend straight into another pick-up.

The sickening road carnage is all the more disgusting when completely innocent people come up against these nutters. For it was clear that after an argument with relatives the miscreant got drunk and continued behind the wheel in a Thai tizzy.

Let’s hope they can make the homicide charge stick not just for the memory of the six month old life  he took, but all our sakes.

And so to this week’s Rooster awards continuing my juvenile theme.

Firstly the “Kindergarten Awareness Prize” goes to the UK’s Alex, 21, a round the bend, sorry, world cyclist who said that she’ll survive the Thai roads as she is keeping to the edge.

No one will be surprised if next week we are reading how another barmy bicyclist failed to beat the odds and get home after trying to traverse the tricky “thanons” of Thailand.

The “Best Project in Year One” award goes to all those government spokesmen and excise folks for their excellent work in making everything clear on the cigarette and booze tax hikes that came in at the weekend.

Talk about the blind leading the blind drunk.

While my “Year Three Compromise in Public Office” award goes to those at Pattaya City Hall who first told the complaining proletariat to shut up and thereafter kowtowed in the mother of all U-turns that saw salvation for the Dolphin Roundabout, latest wonder of the modern world.

Quite some flip for flipper.

Finally the “Back to School” award clearly must go to the more than 300 Bangkok cops – or 10 % of entrants - who failed their law exams on what constitutes a basic traffic violation in the capital.

Having lived and driven a motorcycle in Krung Thep for the best part of four decades there was clearly some skullduggery in the tests.

Surely 90% would fail.



Rooster.

 

 

 

-- © Copyright Thai Visa News 2017-09-17

The UK is being managed much better.  Maybe you could go there.  Don't forget your prayer rug and butcher knife.  Thank you for you opinion.