alcoholics - anyone else having problems trying to get semi sober

[Neeranam]

22 minutes ago, jeab1980 said:

If you would have read my post i clearly state i went back to home country. I was a member i suppose i still am of AA but i feel and have done for some years i do no longer need them. But its always good to know they are there if needed.

So you are now saying there are good thai doctors. Slightly confused with your differing stance now

No, I never said there are good Thai doctors. Good you don't need AA. I'll keep going to keep the meeting open in case you need it. 

[MrPatrickThai]

42 minutes ago, jeab1980 said:

 I was a member i suppose i still am of AA but i feel and have done for some years i do no longer need them. But its always good to know they are there if needed.

You certainly are not what I call a member of AA.

 

Thank God for people who go regularly to meetings and keep this thing going.

 

I used to go to meetings by myself, when I was busy with work and had young kids, just because someone in need might turn  up. A few did and some are still sober. One local guy came for the first time in 10 years to pick up a 25 year chip and talked about how grateful he was for AA!!

Edited October 6, 2017 by MrPatrickThai

[jeab1980]

25 minutes ago, Neeranam said:

No, I never said there are good Thai doctors. Good you don't need AA. I'll keep going to keep the meeting open in case you need it. 

God forbid but as i said if needed

[jeab1980]

9 minutes ago, MrPatrickThai said:

You certainly are not what I call a member of AA.

 

Thank God for people who go regularly to meetings and keep this thing going.

 

I used to go to meetings by myself, when I was busy with work and had young kids, just because someone in need might turn  up. A few did and some are still sober. One local guy came for the first time in 10 years to pick up a 25 year chip and talked about how grateful he was for AA!!

I am a member once a member always a member you dont have to show up at every meeting. I know they are there if i need them. There are like you pwople who like to pass on there knowledge at meetings there are also.people like me who will help in anyway i can outside of the meetings. I have helped or at least i hope i have over the years to those who reach out for help.

[MrPatrickThai]

1 minute ago, jeab1980 said:

I am a member once a member always a member you dont have to show up at every meeting. I know they are there if i need them. There are like you pwople who like to pass on there knowledge at meetings there are also.people like me who will help in anyway i can outside of the meetings. I have helped or at least i hope i have over the years to those who reach out for help.

In my humble opinion, a member has a home group, and a sponsor/sponsee/s. Also, to be able to pass on this valuable message one needs to have had a spiritual experience , as a result of working ALL 12 steps. You can't give away something you don't have.

I can't imagine having worked these steps NOT wanting to give it away. AA has become so watered down these days.  

[Neeranam]

13 minutes ago, jeab1980 said:

I am a member once a member always a member you dont have to show up at every meeting. I know they are there if i need them. There are like you pwople who like to pass on there knowledge at meetings there are also.people like me who will help in anyway i can outside of the meetings. I have helped or at least i hope i have over the years to those who reach out for help.

How long have you been sober?

[atyclb]

34 minutes ago, MrPatrickThai said:

In my humble opinion, a member has a home group, and a sponsor/sponsee/s. Also, to be able to pass on this valuable message one needs to have had a spiritual experience , as a result of working ALL 12 steps. You can't give away something you don't have.

I can't imagine having worked these steps NOT wanting to give it away. AA has become so watered down these days.  

 

 

perhaps he means "inactive member" but always in his heart.

[jeab1980]

29 minutes ago, Neeranam said:

How long have you been sober?

35 yrs as a recovering Alcoholic. One day at a time even now

[jeab1980]

36 minutes ago, MrPatrickThai said:

In my humble opinion, a member has a home group, and a sponsor/sponsee/s. Also, to be able to pass on this valuable message one needs to have had a spiritual experience , as a result of working ALL 12 steps. You can't give away something you don't have.

I can't imagine having worked these steps NOT wanting to give it away. AA has become so watered down these days.  

Theres another reason i dont go. But im not getting into the so called religious/spiritual nonesense.you are who you are and you enjoy it. I am who i am and i enjoy my sober life. I dont belive in spiritual mumbo jumbo and didnt when i was active Within AA.  What we can pass on is wisdom of having been there and wisdom of how to get out of the deep holes.

[impulse]

1 hour ago, jeab1980 said:

Theres another reason i dont go. But im not getting into the so called religious/spiritual nonesense.you are who you are and you enjoy it. I am who i am and i enjoy my sober life. I dont belive in spiritual mumbo jumbo and didnt when i was active Within AA.  What we can pass on is wisdom of having been there and wisdom of how to get out of the deep holes.

 

The reality is that the majority of AA meetings today were started by someone who copped a resentment at the way their old meeting was being run- and started a new group.  And thank God for that.  Anyone tuned in here that didn't like AA, try a different meeting.  Then another.  You're likely to find one you like, with a group of people who feel the same about the spiritual aspects, or the membership list, or whatever you didn't like. 

 

Except picking up that first drink.  We're all sticklers on that...

 

Edited October 6, 2017 by impulse

[MrPatrickThai]

5 hours ago, jeab1980 said:

Theres another reason i dont go. But im not getting into the so called religious/spiritual nonesense.you are who you are and you enjoy it. I am who i am and i enjoy my sober life. I dont belive in spiritual mumbo jumbo and didnt when i was active Within AA.  What we can pass on is wisdom of having been there and wisdom of how to get out of the deep holes.

How can you be active in a spiritual program with a spiritual solution if you are not spiritual? How can you do the 12 steps to get the necessary spiritual experience? I guess you don't believe in a "higher power".

Basically you are saying that AA is nonsense and you don't go, you can stay sober on your own. Well best of luck, sincerely. Have you ever thought that you might not be an alcoholic?

[jeab1980]

1 minute ago, MrPatrickThai said:

How can you be active in a spiritual program with a spiritual solution if you are not spiritual? How can you do the 12 steps to get the necessary spiritual experience? I guess you don't believe in a "higher power".

Basically you are saying that AA is nonsense and you don't go, you can stay sober on your own. Well best of luck, sincerely. Have you ever thought that you might not be an alcoholic?

Heard some garbage like this at AA meetings higher power my arse. Ever thought your ideas are stupid?.

To tell an alcholic that maybe your not as he ie me doesnt comply to the spiritualist <deleted> or a higher power crap is plain dumb.

I have never said the AA is nonesense i found a good group with my views.

I stay sober for many reasons now none of yhem are anything to do with spiritual or higherbpowers.

Im actually quite offended by your remarks.

 

[MrPatrickThai]

2 minutes ago, jeab1980 said:

Heard some garbage like this at AA meetings higher power my arse. Ever thought your ideas are stupid?.

To tell an alcholic that maybe your not as he ie me doesnt comply to the spiritualist <deleted> or a higher power crap is plain dumb.

I have never said the AA is nonesense i found a good group with my views.

I stay sober for many reasons now none of yhem are anything to do with spiritual or higherbpowers.

Im actually quite offended by your remarks.

 

You found a good AA group that never used the word God? 

[jeab1980]

4 minutes ago, MrPatrickThai said:

You found a good AA group that never used the word God? 

Yes i did  now please im not interested in your rhetoric or preachings. Any man who can actually base a conclusion as you did over a forum is obviously very narrow minded. You dont know me you have no idea what led me to drink. You have no idea of what network of support i have. To actually say "Have you ever thought that you might not be an alcoholic" is beyond belief. 

i am and always will be an Alcholic the diffrence now is i choose not to drink.

im not supprised your meetings are giong down the pan. 

I have no intention of getting into a pissing match with you.

we disagree on the three letter word you used get over it. 

[PeCeDe]

11 minutes ago, jeab1980 said:

31 minutes ago, jeab1980 said:

Heard some garbage like this at AA meetings higher power my arse. Ever thought your ideas are stupid?.

To tell an alcholic that maybe your not as he ie me doesnt comply to the spiritualist <deleted> or a higher power crap is plain dumb.

I have never said the AA is nonesense i found a good group with my views.

I stay sober for many reasons now none of yhem are anything to do with spiritual or higherbpowers.

Im actually quite offended by your remarks.

 

Is english your first language, because if it is I would guess you're not sober now. I do agree with with what you're saying, but the spelling is a distraction.

 

[PeCeDe]

Jeab 1980 does bring up good points. I belonged to an AA group for many years and brought quite a few drunks into the "fold" and then sadly I lost my grip and was gone for six more excruciating years. I had to fly to the UK to get the treatment I needed, got sober again and returned to Canada and to my original AA group only to be greeted by the most obnoxious group of "Told you so's" you could imagine, people I had nursed into sobriety years prior. AA people can be so pedantic and dare I say uncaring and proud of their accomplishments that they forget where they came from and have absolutely no right to criticize.

[Neeranam]

1 hour ago, jeab1980 said:

 

i am and always will be an Alcholic the diffrence now is i choose not to drink.

Getting a little heated here!

 

We seek spiritual progress, not perfection, as the big book says.

 

If someone can choose to control or stop drinking, then I believe they don't belong in AA, there are many other routes to quit drinking for them. I lost the power of choice at age 13.

 

Let's remember, as AA members what our primary purpose is - to help the alcoholic that is still suffering.

 

 

 

[atyclb]

5 hours ago, MrPatrickThai said:

How can you be active in a spiritual program with a spiritual solution if you are not spiritual? How can you do the 12 steps to get the necessary spiritual experience? I guess you don't believe in a "higher power".

Basically you are saying that AA is nonsense and you don't go, you can stay sober on your own. Well best of luck, sincerely. Have you ever thought that you might not be an alcoholic?

 

 

did they not say at the meetings  "take what you want and leave the rest" ??

[jeab1980]

7 hours ago, Neeranam said:

Getting a little heated here!

 

We seek spiritual progress, not perfection, as the big book says.

 

If someone can choose to control or stop drinking, then I believe they don't belong in AA, there are many other routes to quit drinking for them. I lost the power of choice at age 13.

 

Let's remember, as AA members what our primary purpose is - to help the alcoholic that is still suffering.

 

 

 

Again doesnt the AA promote positive power to take control of your own life. To make a choice a comitmet. I know they did for me so therefore your statement is fundementaly floored. I can say after many years sober i can now control whether i have a drink or not. As this is turning into a AA meeting of the god pusher type im gone didnt need it then dont need it now.

[luk AJ]

"Trying to get semi sober"
This won't work! If you are an alcoholic there are only two choices or stay alcoholic or quit entirely. "Semi" is not an option.


Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect

[superglue]

I agree 100%. It is similar to being a little bit pregnant.

[Cory1848]

12 hours ago, MrPatrickThai said:

How can you be active in a spiritual program with a spiritual solution if you are not spiritual? How can you do the 12 steps to get the necessary spiritual experience? I guess you don't believe in a "higher power".

Basically you are saying that AA is nonsense and you don't go, you can stay sober on your own. Well best of luck, sincerely. Have you ever thought that you might not be an alcoholic?

Years ago, I drank alcoholically. Then I quit and I haven’t drunk since. I’ve never attended AA, simply because I haven’t had to to stay sober, but I have all the respect in the world for AA and for those who attend and make an effort to work a program.

 

Because I’ve stayed sober and never worked an AA or other program, some people in AA have told me that, therefore, I’m not an alcoholic. To me, whether I’m an “alcoholic” or not is beside the point; all I can say is, if I were to ever drink even just a glass of beer, I have no way of knowing what would happen next. That uncertainty has been all I’ve ever needed to stay sober.

But I wouldn’t recommend the way I’ve done it to anyone who feels he or she might be an alcoholic or a problem drinker; I would wholeheartedly recommend AA -- not necessarily for the “spirituality tools” that AA offers, although those tools have helped countless people, but just to be with other people who want to be sober. And if I ever thought I was seriously close to taking a drink, I would make a beeline for the closest AA meeting I could find.

[MrPatrickThai]

1 hour ago, Cory1848 said:

Years ago, I drank alcoholically. Then I quit and I haven’t drunk since. I’ve never attended AA, simply because I haven’t had to to stay sober, but I have all the respect in the world for AA and for those who attend and make an effort to work a program.

 

 

Because I’ve stayed sober and never worked an AA or other program, some people in AA have told me that, therefore, I’m not an alcoholic. To me, whether I’m an “alcoholic” or not is beside the point; all I can say is, if I were to ever drink even just a glass of beer, I have no way of knowing what would happen next. That uncertainty has been all I’ve ever needed to stay sober.

But I wouldn’t recommend the way I’ve done it to anyone who feels he or she might be an alcoholic or a problem drinker; I would wholeheartedly recommend AA -- not necessarily for the “spirituality tools” that AA offers, although those tools have helped countless people, but just to be with other people who want to be sober. And if I ever thought I was seriously close to taking a drink, I would make a beeline for the closest AA meeting I could find.

Well said!

 

 

[MrPatrickThai]

4 hours ago, jeab1980 said:

Again doesnt the AA promote positive power to take control of your own life. To make a choice a comitmet. I know they did for me so therefore your statement is fundementaly floored. I can say after many years sober i can now control whether i have a drink or not. As this is turning into a AA meeting of the god pusher type im gone didnt need it then dont need it now.

Please listen to the following speaker, if you are offended, you are not one of us. 

https://www.recoveryaudio.org/aa-speaker-tapes/open-discussion-aa-meetings

 

[Neeranam]

On 06/10/2017 at 3:40 PM, jeab1980 said:

I am a member once a member always a member you dont have to show up at every meeting. I know they are there if i need them. There are like you pwople who like to pass on there knowledge at meetings there are also.people like me who will help in anyway i can outside of the meetings. I have helped or at least i hope i have over the years to those who reach out for help.

How long is it since you went to a meeting of AA?

I'm confused how people reach out for help to you, how do they find you?

Do you never feel a responsibility to give back what was given to you?

Grateful alcoholics don't go to meetings because they like to pass on the knowledge.

Still recovering after 35 years?!!

Work the steps dude, then you will be recovered. I assume you haven't, but apologize if wrong.

 

 

[Neeranam]

On 06/10/2017 at 11:49 PM, PeCeDe said:

Jeab 1980 does bring up good points

Can you point out one?

[Neeranam]

On 07/10/2017 at 8:16 AM, jeab1980 said:

Again doesnt the AA promote positive power to take control of your own life. To make a choice a comitmet. I know they did for me so therefore your statement is fundementaly floored. I can say after many years sober i can now control whether i have a drink or not. As this is turning into a AA meeting of the god pusher type im gone didnt need it then dont need it now.

Absolutely not! Man, you say you have been an AA member for 35 years but never read the AA Big book.

 "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him." 

 

[Neeranam]

On 07/10/2017 at 1:12 PM, MrPatrickThai said:

Please listen to the following speaker, if you are offended, you are not one of us. 

https://www.recoveryaudio.org/aa-speaker-tapes/open-discussion-aa-meetings

 

Thanks for the link. Strong message.

I know many that call themselves AA members who would be offended listening to that. 

[Cory1848]

24 minutes ago, Neeranam said:

Still recovering after 35 years?!!

Work the steps dude, then you will be recovered. I assume you haven't, but apologize if wrong.

 

 

Everything that I’ve read and heard about alcoholism (which is a lot) teaches that one is an alcoholic for life; there is no “cure” available. One can be sober for thirty years and still be “in recovery.” Another way to look at is, alcoholism is a condition that is exacerbated by drinking. It’s happened countless times that an alcoholic has been sober for decades, had one drink, and been right back where he was before he stopped drinking or worse, in just a matter of days.

One could argue perhaps that to say you are “in recovery” after thirty years of sobriety is a semantic trick, a way of looking at it that keeps you on guard. But to claim that you are a “recovered” alcoholic is hubris.

[Neeranam]

3 minutes ago, Cory1848 said:

Everything that I’ve read and heard about alcoholism (which is a lot) teaches that one is an alcoholic for life; there is no “cure” available. One can be sober for thirty years and still be “in recovery.” Another way to look at is, alcoholism is a condition that is exacerbated by drinking. It’s happened countless times that an alcoholic has been sober for decades, had one drink, and been right back where he was before he stopped drinking or worse, in just a matter of days.

One could argue perhaps that to say you are “in recovery” after thirty years of sobriety is a semantic trick, a way of looking at it that keeps you on guard. But to claim that you are a “recovered” alcoholic is hubris.

Try going to an AA meeting, you'll learn a lot about the disease.

I wonder what the big book says, recovered or recovering?