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How to deal with an antagonistic guy in my


MISTEEIED

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A wee problem in my Moo Baan..I have recently rented a house in a nice Moo Baan and all is well. Except for a slightly obnoxious westerner house owner who has deemed himself to be the sherriff of the pool and fitness area.  He shouted at my step son and other children to shut up at the pool last week [they were a bit noisy , but not excessively so]. I didn't react to him at the time, but later at the fitness area he told me in no uncertain terms that he did not like me and children and suggested maybe not use his pool and should consider to move out of the Moo Baan maybe.
He was quite belligerent, but, i told him what i thought of his plans for me. Loud words quickly became push and shove and then he told me he would sort me out and pushed me away.
I just left the area as i am not a fighter and now stay away from  the pool etc when i see his bike there but sometimes i want to go there whenever, and sometimes we pass and he makes threatening gestures to me.
I have made it known that i am not going to fight with him and just want to enjoy life, but it seems to just make him more aggressive.
I don't want to move out, but his presence is uncomfortable to me and my family.
I should add, that this is not just him on me, but is his MO to all in the estate who he chooses to pick on, i have since been told.
So..i'm pondering on the best course of action
Any one been in a similar predicament, and if so, how did you resolve it please?
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Just ignore him... ignore him and ignore him... 

 

You said you are not a fighter and there is no reason to be, right up until the point he threatens your Children.

 

Do not change your plans because of him - Go to the pool whenever you want, allow your children to enjoy themselves but also be respectful of others around them. 

 

My son is incredible noisy at the pool and I always have to tell him to keep it down. Just ensure your son is not 'overly noisy'... kids playing is one thing, kids screaming unnecessarily at the top of their lungs all afternoon is different and can be annoying so try and approach the situation with balance. 

 

If he carries on being antagonistic, ignore him, he's just a dick... if he makes any threats towards you or your family involve the police immediately and have them make a report. 

 

Have the phone read to video him. Have someone video you as you walk to the pool etc just in case he does something threatening as you pass etc...  

 

 

 

 

 

 

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1 hour ago, taotoo said:

Throw his bike in the pool.

 

Next story please.

How rude (and you are an advanced member)? Your "solution"; your obvious lack of empathy and obnoxious response only further highlights the challenges the OP is already facing.

 

Anyway, I understand it's difficult if you (the OP) are being intimated by someone and I understand your reluctance to get physically involved with this bully. Not everyone can (or wants to) a confrontation. As you have already made it clear that this (his) behaviour is unacceptable then I would urge you to follow the advice from Richard Smith and Binjalin which is sound. Inform the moo baan manager and if you don't receive a satisfactor response within a week, then please go to the police and make a report (it might also be a good idea to see if there are other residents who are willing to support you) . There's no reason why you should only enjoy the benefits of living at your moo baan at the discretion of another.

 

Regards,

 

Joe

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1 hour ago, Happy Grumpy said:

Teach your unruly kids how to properly behave.  

Like what behavior is appropriate in what circumstances and consideration for others.

If you were at a 5 star hotel would you let your kids run wild in the pool, the restaurant or your room? Or even a 3 star?

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There are probably 2 courses of action if you wish to stay in the Moo Bahn: 

 

The longer drawn out way is as has been suggested and you do it thru the proper channels...ie Body corporate/Jurrassic person(Yes I jest)/Police reports.  This will either make this guy pull his head in or he MAY become more antagonistic towards you and your family.  

 

When dealing with bullies it does take some balls to stand up to them. Especially if they are 'bigger' physically.  But bullies dont always live up to their 'bluff'.  Personally Id give him a good swift kick/knee to the nuts.... and then apologise for missing his egotistical head. But then Im ex military so Im somewhat brainwashed!  

 

I tend not to back down when provoked, unless I know/figure out that the opponent is just a <deleted> and not worth my time or effort.  

 

Do what you are comfortable with...

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31 minutes ago, CMKiwi said:

Personally Id give him a good swift kick/knee to the nuts.... and then apologise for missing his egotistical head.

Practice a "Glasgow kiss" until you're really good at it. Then deliver it.

 

After that, ignore him.

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7 hours ago, MISTEEIED said:

He was quite belligerent, but, i told him what i thought of his plans for me. Loud words quickly became push and shove and then he told me he would sort me out and pushed me away.

He backed down otherwise he would have sorted you out then and there.

 

He cannot do anything about making you move so encourage your rowdy-assed kids to be especially rowdy when they see him. Get a Thai nickname for the guy and encourage the kids to use it loudly when they see him. Use it yourself whenever he's in earshot. Get on his goat before he gets on yours. Take the 'fight' to him.

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1 minute ago, NanLaew said:

He backed down otherwise he would have sorted you out then and there.

 

He cannot do anything about making you move so encourage your rowdy-assed kids to be especially rowdy when they see him. Get a Thai nickname for the guy and encourage the kids to use it loudly when they see him. Use it yourself whenever he's in earshot. Get on his goat before he gets on yours. Take the 'fight' to him.

That is rather immature .

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7 minutes ago, sanemax said:

That is rather immature .

And so is, 'Well he started it!'

 

Your recommendation to be cowed by a bully and simply slink away with the tail between the legs isn't really up there in the 'behave like adults' stakes either.

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7 minutes ago, NanLaew said:

And so is, 'Well he started it!'

 

Your recommendation to be cowed by a bully and simply slink away with the tail between the legs isn't really up there in the 'behave like adults' stakes either.

Its his first post .

Similar writing style to a lot of other "first" posters

Usually posts a controversial subject on a Friday

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4 hours ago, Dellboy218 said:

Do you have a tourist policeman living on your village?  If you have, the chances are he has upset some of the locals as well and a visit from your local Policeman might just work. Get the locals on your side.

The police won`t be in the slightest bit interested. All they`ll do is make a report and the OP will not hear anything else from them. Forget about the locals, they won`t want to know either.

 

Does the OP have any friends or his wife`s family who could accompany the OP to the pool when the thug is there? BTW, bet the guy is either British or Australian. Ask the friends or relatives to stay in the background so that the thug thinks the OP is on his own and just with his kids. Get the wife to run a video, get the kids to make lots of noise, then if the thug makes the first move, gang up on him with the people in his group.

 

That`s about all I can suggest.

 

 

 

 

 

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38 minutes ago, cyberfarang said:

The police won`t be in the slightest bit interested. All they`ll do is make a report and the OP will not hear anything else from them. Forget about the locals, they won`t want to know either.

 

Does the OP have any friends or his wife`s family who could accompany the OP to the pool when the thug is there? BTW, bet the guy is either British or Australian. Ask the friends or relatives to stay in the background so that the thug thinks the OP is on his own and just with his kids. Get the wife to run a video, get the kids to make lots of noise, then if the thug makes the first move, gang up on him with the people in his group.

 

That`s about all I can suggest.

 

Agreed, the cops would need a bung to do anything and if this bugger has any smarts, he will give them a bigger bung to make the OP's life more mierable. The BiB aint an option in such low-level guerilla warfare IMHO.

 

How about getting the friends and relatives and the kids to go to the pool and ALL get rowdy. When 'Hitler' sticks his head above the parapet, poke him in the eye... and then ALL laugh rowdily and call him the Thai nickname that I suggested your kids start shouting at him.

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The guy already smells fear on you (not saying you’re scared of him, but that’s his perception)- ‘telling the teacher’ is only going to make him feel stronger, and likely won’t amount to anything.  You have to stand up to a bully- even if you get the worst of it, if he gets it badly enough, he’ll lay off you.  There’s a chihuahua in my neighborhood that none of the big dogs mess with (even though they could eat him in one bite) because he makes them regret it.  You don’t have to necessarily get physical- just let him know you’re willing if pushed far enough.

 

Or move.

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Couldn't you and all the other residents hold hands, light candles, shed a few tears and sing "we shall overcome".

 

This seems to be the way terrorist atrocities are dealt with in the West now so should work for an annoying kii nok.

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Couldn't you and all the other residents hold hands, light candles, shed a few tears and sing "we shall overcome".
 
This seems to be the way terrorist atrocities are dealt with in the West now so should work for an annoying kii nok.

Not a bad idea, if he can get the full co-operation of the residents, especially those with young children, as it would hopefully shame the unpleasant man into behaving more pleasantly.

Sent from my SM-G930F using Thailand Forum - Thaivisa mobile app

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