... Great Chieftain o' the pudding race

 

A Happy Burns Night to all and sundry, and commiserations to those that are suffering chinese burns.

 

I was in the hospital the other night and a fellow was wailing

"A man's a man for a' that..."

"O What a panic's in thy breastie!"

 

"Fair fa'yer honest sonsie face" I cried out

"Shoosh, sir, this is the Serious Burns Unit" the nurse exclaimed

 

SC

What ails ye noo?  Merry Burns night to the Sweaties among us. 

Noo ma ale's Kilkenny

I was once in a bar in Glasgow and a local asked me:

"Di ye like Burns?"

"Yes" said I. And he stubbed his cigarette out on my arm.