Are you a Loser?

[bwpage3]

There are 62 pages of posts in the marriage and divorce section.

 

Here are a few interesting  comments:

 

1. "I don't have an income in Thailand and don't have the financial resources to fight for my kid in court"

2. Thai wife wants divorce after 5 months

3. Do you tell your Thai wife/girlfriend the truth about going to bars, playing with girls, etc.?

4. Can wife force divorce if I refuse?

5. My marriage crash and burn in Thailand

 

So what are the odds the Thai woman was 100% at fault in all these divorce cases?

 

I say 0% and thus the topic: Are you a Loser?

 

Move all the way to Thailand where you have nothing in common with the culture or language because Thailand has a reputation of the world's easiest women.

 

It seems odd someone would cash in all their chips and be smart enough to get themselves physically moved to Thailand, then be stupid enough to get played by a Thai woman and lose it all or get divorced. 

 

Yet there is an abundance of evidence that suggests that divorce happens day in and day out.

 

Could it be a certain percentage of the males that relocate to Thailand are just complete losers? 

1. Don't know the difference between a good woman or bad

2. Thinks they are different and will never happen to them

3. Act like a complete A-Hole which is why they were divorced in their own country and then wonder why they get divorced in Thailand

4. Treat their Thai wives like servants

 

The list goes on and on and on

 

Now the fun begins!

 

All the punters that have been divorced in their own country, then in Thailand, lost all their money, get online and start bashing the truths,  never once looking in the mirror to see the Loser that their really are.

 

Only in a country like Thailand will a woman take a complete chance on a loser knowing he is such and she will come out on top financially. 

 

Lots of men get married, stay married, educate their children, get along with their families and seem to know how to be a man, loving husband, father etc. Evident by the number of people married 10 years or more.

 

Yet some? Well you have to admit they were losers before they came to Thailand and are even bigger losers failing in Thailand.

 

If the shoe fits, wear it.

 

Amazing the number of losers that cannot make it with the easiest women in the world?

 

Now the posts will come flying out of the woodwork blaming everything and everyone but themselves.

 

That makes you a complete loser!

 

 

 

 

 

[simoh1490]

Yes, I'm a loser, I clicked on this thread and actually wasted two minutes of my life reading it - troll! 

[ezzra]

The only thing i ever lost in Thailand was my hair, 30 years ago i had

 head full of lucouse hair, now, not so much...

as for being a loser in love and marriage, hindsight are always 20/20,

people like to believe and trust other people until they get hit over the

head, part of life and even bigger part of living in Thailand, some learn

some not... 

[geriatrickid]

I did not start this thread  

[HLover]

I lost my innocence...

Then I lost interest 3 sentences into this original post.

[jumbo]

I think the OP has a point

[Peterw42]

Not sure what response the OP is looking for, other than just agreeing with his views.

 

"If you get divorced back home you are a loser, if you get divorced in Thailand you are a loser, if you disagree with the OP you are a loser".

 

I am not aware that the divorce rate is proportionately higher amongst Expats in Thailand. As they are private affairs, I have no idea who is to blame either. My knowledge of Thai divorce laws is, you get to keep what you had before the divorce and split what you acquired during, possibly losing nothing financially. 

 

For 100 divorces , they may 100 different reasons as to why the marriage failed, usually its a 50/50 senario, not a winner and loser.

 

Maybe the OP can enlighten us as to the actual divorce rate amongst expats and the why only one half of the marriage is to blame , or the loser ?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[OneMoreFarang]

I think a big part of the problem is that relative well educated people who come to Thailand with lots of not so well educated people think they can handle this easily because they are so much smarter.

 

And many people assume too much. They think i.e. that there is fair law enforcements, etc. But that is not the case, at least not always. So people lose a lot and become losers.

 

With some of them it's almost funny to see them lose because they asked for it. But there are also decent people who made some wrong moves and then lose everything.

 

Apart from that I think it would be interesting to ask the people you call losers if they think themselves they are losers. I.e. maybe someone was in a unhappy sexless marriage somewhere in the west. And then he moved to Thailand and was happy for some time and then lost everything. I am sure many of those guys would do it again even knowing the outcome - because that was still better than the alternative.

[worgeordie]

I think the OP is the loser,if he has nothing better to do..

regards worgeordie

[HampiK]

How you know, that in Thailand so many marriages fail?

 

The problem the people who not have problem most of the time not post about it, only when something is going wrong.

Check the topics? How many tell about something good happens and how many about something going wrong?

 

[owl sees all]

A lot of guys come to Thailand for adventure in their latter years. They find romance, companionship and love. Often leading to marriage and sometimes a kiddie.

 

What these farang don't always understand is that invariably the women who was hugging them so closely in the early days has a different (and secret/hidden) agenda. When push has come to shove, the farang is left contemplating why/how the  relationship deteriorated so far; and often so fast.

 

I've been in Thailand (Isaan) for 10 years now and I've watched as couple after couple have seemingly insurmountable problems, culminating in their relationships falling apart. I can honestly say that in most, the whole catastrophe has been orchestrated by the wife and her family.

[OneMoreFarang]

1 hour ago, owl sees all said:

... the whole catastrophe has been orchestrated by the wife and her family

But let's not forget that the farang married into that family. And they wouldn't be able to i.e. get all his money if he wouldn't have made some serious miscalculations and/or mistakes.

 

It like blaming hookers why they talk money from their customers. If the customers want to give it to them you can't really blame them for taking it.

(I know not all Thai wives are hookers and lots of hookers are nice people but the principle is still the same)

[owl sees all]

25 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

But let's not forget that the farang married into that family. And they wouldn't be able to i.e. get all his money if he wouldn't have made some serious miscalculations and/or mistakes.

Often the narrative is soooo  different from the wives before the marriage.

 

If a Thai lady marries a Thai it wouldn't be expected for him to hand over everything to her family until there's nothing left. With the farang it's different; they expect to get his money; all of it. It's when they can't get their hands on the goodies, that trouble often starts.

 

Farang should understand that greed drives this country; from top to bottom. Not always appreciated by farang in their early days here. I've learnt the hard way; as have thousands of others.

 

For further reading I suggest 'Poison brother-in-law' by Rc2702, 2017. Heart-rendering, sad and funny but at the same time enlightening and informative.

[klauskunkel]

I lost my patience once..., then I found it in the fridge.

[Emster23]

If you are concerned about whether you are a winner or a loser, may I suggest you are a loser even if you are a "winner"

[owl sees all]

1 hour ago, klauskunkel said:

I lost my patience once..., then I found it in the fridge.

Good!

 

Reminds me of a true story in Kumpawappi a couple of years ago. 

 

There were two fridges in Ron's kitchen. A big one the family used and a smaller one he kept his farang stuff in; cheese, marmite, bacon, beer etc.

 

He was forever complaining that the family were raiding his fridge when he was out. His wife's son and daughter both lived at the house but the wife never knew who the culprits were.

 

Ron had to get his visa in Laos, and would be gone for a couple of days. Me too. Met up in Nong Khai and we went off for the visas. He told me what he had done to stop the pilfering. To protect his goodies, he had put a heavy chain around the fridge,  through the door handle, and padlocked it. "That'll sort them out," he said, "they couldn't even cut through THAT chain!"  

 

He dropped me home near Nong Khai, when back in Thailand, and he went off to Kumpawappi (100k away)  After arriving back, he really fancied a cold beer. Went to the fridge and found the handle had been cut off, with a grinder, and the chain and lock were in the corner. He challenged the wife; "don't know, could have been anyone."

 

I could see the funny side of it and so could he, a few months later.

[Time Traveller]

6 hours ago, jumbo said:

I think the OP has a point

Well I wonder why the OP (and you also it seems) care so much that other people are losers? Do you get bothered by them? Are those losers making you feel inadequate?  Or is it a case of seeing in those "losers" a mirror reflective of your own lives?

Guess we should all be grateful for the OP's supreme knowledge and lecturing everything about everything they are doing wrong. But don't hide your talents behind these anonymous webforums. Go out onto the streets and teach the losers, let them benefit from your special wisdom. You'd have to be a selfish self centered ass not to, right? 

Come OP, share your gift with the world !

 

 

[ThaiWai]

Women are the same all over the world.  The only difference is the price ranges.  You can impress with less here for sure but if you don't follow through it's not gonna work out regardless of how much money there is.  A woman needs maintenance which some men find tedious, again, recipe for disaster.  Some of them are batshit nuts also.  I have been with the same girl since I got here and we had a few issues but saw the interior of each other through it all and settled into a good rhythm and have been smooth sailing for years now.  I don't expect that to change but she is a person not a pet and free to go whenever she wants.  I will be disappointed to say the least.  Then I am going to bone the brains out of her sister. Hey..life goes on.

[cyberfarang]

The real losers are the children that are born from these relationships, the Thai women hoping for more prosperous lives with what they believe at first are men who will financially care for them and the deadbeat Farlangs that run for the hills once they realise there are commitments involved and can`t live up to the Thai woman`s expectations of them.

[Bangkokazy]

Are you looking for a Jojo life?
Move to thailand and read thaivisa,
and live the opposite of what you hear and read.

[Destiny1990]

Well certainly there are not many winners here.

[smotherb]

I just looked around the bar and noted how many of these losers have been sitting here since early this morning.

[TKDfella]

With the comments about the OP I think we could start a new thread 'Why OP's that ask 'are you a loser' are losers, Ha!

[totally thaied up]

I am pretty much a loser.  I have a serious mental disorder and been living in Thailand for 10 years now.  I have nothing and I repeat "nothing" to offer my wife. 

 

I watch all my so call friends buy cars for the girl friends,  renovate kitchens and outdoor areas for them.  It makes me feel truly inadequate as a person.

 

Yet over time I see the cars and girls disappear an these guys left with nothing.  Yes,  they are very,  very rich men but I have seen them crying over loss of property given.  Yet my wife is still with me. 

 

A close school friend died this week.  Net worth was 17 million dollars.  Had pancreatic cancer. Not married but married to his business.

 

He was 49 and I am 48.

 

Maybe I am not a loser then as I am still alive. I just gather,  life is as you make it and the decisions you make. 

[atyclb]

there are no expat losers in thailand.  think the op meant to post on cambodia forum

[dotpoom]

In my book...the "losers" in this life are the people who refer to another person as a "loser"

[dotpoom]

In my book, the only losers in this life are those who have the cheek to call another person a "loser".

[Lacessit]

No

[soalbundy]

what a stupid topic from an arrogant man, there are no losers in life, it is a learning process, some take longer than others, some are unfortunate enough to be dealt a bad hand and yet like Prof. Hawkins rise above it, some, like Trump, cannot rise above themselves, it isn't even his fault his mental make up won't allow it. Stop thinking you are in control, what happens happens because it can be no other way. Think about why you started this post.

[soalbundy]

what a stupid topic from an arrogant man, there are no losers in life, it is a learning process, some take longer than others, some are unfortunate enough to be dealt a bad hand and yet like Prof. Hawkins rise above it, some, like Trump, cannot rise above themselves, it isn't even his fault his mental make up won't allow it. Stop thinking you are in control, what happens happens because it can be no other way. Think about why you started this post.