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A man went into a store and told the clerk, "I'd like some Polish sausage."

The clerk looked at him and said, "Are you Polish?"

The guy, clearly offended, said, "Well, yes I am. But let me ask you something.

If I had asked for Italian sausage would you ask me if I was Italian?

Or if I had asked for German bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German?

Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask me if I was Jewish?

Or if I had asked for a taco would you ask if I was Mexican?

"And if I asked for some Irish whiskey, would you ask if I was Irish?"

" Well.......... ."

With deep self-righteous indignation, the guy said, "All right then, why did you ask me if I'm Polish just because I ask for Polish sausage?"

The clerk replies, "Because you're at Home Depot."

On a Septic Tank Truck in Oregon:

"Yesterday's Meals on Wheels"

On a Septic Tank Truck sign:

"We're #1 in the #2 business."

Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:

"Dr. Jones, at your cervix."

At a Proctologist's door

"To expedite your visit please back in."

On a Plumber's truck:

"We repair what your husband fixed."

On a Plumber's truck:

"Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.."

Pizza Shop Slogan:

"7 days without pizza makes one weak."

At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee:

"Invite us to your next blowout."

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