Worst Joke Ever 2024

[sanuk711]

[sanuk711]

I found Putin to be-- a worthy adversary

[Hamus Yaigh]

I met a Dalek in the pub who claimed he was from Devon so I asked him “Whereabouts in Devon are you from mate ?”

 

He replied “EXETER MATE! EXETER MATE!”

[sanuk711]

[WorriedNoodle]

[Susco]

[Susco]

[chickenslegs]

I've just been listening to a few episodes of I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue. Here's a few of Humph's  "prizes".

 

This week's prize is an ideal snack for the chiropodist on the move - it's these tasty microwave bunion rings.

 

This week's prize is just the thing for the aspiring athlete to keep an unruly carpet in check - it's this set of anabolic stair-rods.

 

This week's prize will provide the winner with a never ending supply of eggs for that environmentally friendly breakfast - it's this rechargeable battery hen.

 

This week's prize is just the thing to ride around Paris on when doing the Victor Hugo tour - it's this economical 1.6 litre hunchback.

 

This week's prize will delight the sweet-toothed classical music lover - it's this bag of Schubert dips.

 

[sanuk711]

[sanuk711]

[fangless]

1 hour ago, chickenslegs said:

This week's prize will delight the sweet-toothed classical music lover - it's this bag of Schubert dips.

Does that one get a high note-able score in your top ten or is it just sweet music to your ears?

Edited June 18, 2021 by fangless

[roo860]

[chickenslegs]

1 hour ago, roo860 said:

He did very well, considering that they gave him a left-handed wheelbarrow when he is obviously right-handed.

[fangless]

7 hours ago, chickenslegs said:

He did very well, considering that they gave him a left-handed wheelbarrow when he is obviously right-handed.

That is easily solved; just turn round and instead  of pushing the wheelbarrow you pull it behind you!  Another reason for pulling rather than pushing is if your Irish and it is full of  four-leaf clovers as you really shouldn't push your luck.

 

 

Edited June 19, 2021 by fangless

[fangless]

After hearing a couple's complaints that their intimate life wasn't what it used to be, the sex counsellor suggested they vary their choice of positions. "For example," he suggested, "you might try the wheelbarrow? Just lift her legs from behind and insert your thingy and off you go!" The eager husband was all for trying this new idea as soon as they got home. "Well, okay,.." the hesitant wife agreed, "...but on two conditions. First, if it hurts you have to stop right away, and second...

 

you have to promise we won't go past my parents' house!"

[ravip]

[ballpoint]

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[sanuk711]

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[sanuk711]

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[sanuk711]

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[sanuk711]

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[sanuk711]

Chameleons---really rubbish at Poker

 

[sanuk711]

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[sanuk711]