Worst Joke Ever 2025

[WorriedNoodle]

[Andrew Dwyer]

 

 

Yup, and I nearly got it that time !! ????

[Andrew Dwyer]

 

 

Hairy pussy ??

[ballpoint]

6 hours ago, WorriedNoodle said:

Got any 'ose?

[scottiejohn]

11 minutes ago, ballpoint said:

Got any 'ose?

I didn't know 'worriednoodle' was Mexican!!

[scottiejohn]

[scottiejohn]

Two presidential aides are having coffee in a back room at the White House.

"Sometimes I wish we worked for the pope and not the president," one of them says.
"Why?" asks the second aide.
"Because then we'd only have to kiss the Pope's ring."
 

[scottiejohn]

[scottiejohn]

A heartless drill instructor screamed at his platoon for over an hour. He got in the face of a private and yelled, "I bet when I die you'll show up at my grave and spit on it!"
"Not me," the private said.

"After I get out of the army I'm never standing in a line again."
 

[scottiejohn]

[scottiejohn]

A man is standing on a busy street corner with a placard over his chest for the local McDonald's. On the front, in big bold letters, are the words Free Big Mac. A big Irish blonde walks over and asks the man,

"What is Mac serving time for?"
 

[scottiejohn]

[ballpoint]

6 hours ago, Andrew Dwyer said:

 

 

Hairy pussy ??

It's a knitten.

[scottiejohn]

14 minutes ago, ballpoint said:

It's a knitten.

 

[ballpoint]

1 hour ago, scottiejohn said:

 

Here's one for you.

 

[Andrew Dwyer]

 

 

That’s the future of British politics right there !!

[Andrew Dwyer]

 

 

Go get it Carl , you have the power ,!

[tifino]

 

 

 

 

[Andrew Dwyer]

[Seth1a2a]

On 11/16/2019 at 8:47 AM, Seth1a2a said:

 

Celebrating   " National Camp Day "    .....Nov 19th.......

[Seth1a2a]

1 minute ago, Seth1a2a said:

Celebrating   " National Camp Day "    .....Nov 19th.......

 

[Seth1a2a]

7 minutes ago, Seth1a2a said:

Celebrating   " National Camp Day "    .....Nov 19th.......

 

[scottiejohn]

[scottiejohn]

What you wish for No1

A man walks into a bar with a cat and an ostrich and orders three pints of beer. 
"That'll be £9.60," says the barman and the man hands over the money. Sometime later, another round is ordered and when it comes to paying, the cat says "You get these ostrich, I think it's your shout." 
The three stay in the bar drinking all night but no matter how many rounds they have, the cat manages to get out of paying. As the bell for last orders rings, the barman says to the man, "How come you're drinking with a cat and an ostrich?" 
"Well," says the man sadly, "not long ago, I was out walking on the beach when I found an old bottle. I took out the cork and a genie appeared who said he'd grant me one wish.

So I asked for a bird with long legs and a tight pussy!" 
 

[scottiejohn]

[scottiejohn]

There are three words to make a man hit rock bottom. 
"Is it in?" 

 

Did you hear about the man who so hated his mother-in-law that he cut the tail off the dog so there would be no visible signs of welcome! 

 

What do good time girls have written on their underwear? 
"Next." 
 

[scottiejohn]

[scottiejohn]

What not to wish for No2

A Redneck was walking in the fields one day when he spotted a bottle hidden in the freshly turned soil. It had a cork in the top and as he pulled it out a genie appeared. 
"Oh thank you, thank you," said the genie. "I'm free at last and I will grant you three wishes." 
 "Well, er..." pondered the Redneck. "I'd like the biggest bottle of whiskey you can give me." 
Whoosh, a litre bottle of the finest whiskey appeared before him and he spent the following hour gulping it down. 
Amazingly, when it was empty it automatically filled itself up again. 
"I can't believe my eyes," gasped the Redneck. 
"Well, you're seeing right," said the genie, "every time you empty the bottle it will automatically fill up. Now what would you like for your other 2 wishes?" 
"Oh that's easy, I'll have another two of the same, please!" 
 

[scottiejohn]

[tifino]

someone is actually, right now; playing out this aussie defence in-joke, on Ebay...

https://www.ebay.com.au/itm/Australian-Defence-Veteran-Covenant-Lapel-Pin/303365012238?hash=item46a1f6bb0e:g:nKgAAOSwSK9dzz-~