At 70 years old I’m looking for the antidote – Do you have it?

[Whip Me Granny]

I don’t want to sound too morbid or upset other forum members with this topic , but its some thing that is praying on my mind ????

 

Its never really struck me before as Ive sailed through life never really thinking that some day I would be an old age pensioner . That sort of thing only happened to other people and I never gave the prospect of becoming a pensioner really much thought . When I finally reached the magic 65 and as I was feeling fine with an unblemished past medical record of never ever having an over night hospital stay I just pushed that 65 number to the back of my mind and life went on.

 

Now Ive reached the age of 70 I’m starting to become more and more distraught and stressed out . Ive even had to stop reading the forums Health and Medicine section as it only upsets me seeing what other forum members of my age group are having to medically contend with. 

 

I know compared to some forum members I seem to have so far dodged the medical issue bullet but that situation has made me think, may be my turn in a hospital bed is coming sooner than later.  

 

I lead a fairly busy life, watch what I eat and exercise most days . Have several hobbies and past times that keep my brain and body active . I have a loving wife and family who support me in every thing I do.

 

The thorn in my side that's starting to really stress me out is this ☹️

 

I am now becoming more and more aware that my time on earth is running out . Many of my friends in my age range due to medical issues have all ready sadly popped their clogs  . No matter what I try I just can’t seem to get that nagging    ‘’ my time is running out ‘’    thought out of my mind to a point where its now become a daily battle. 

 

So I was wondering what other forum members here who are also getting on in years like my self are doing to try and combat any similar thoughts.  Have you also reached a point in your life where you now know like me that your time on earth is slowly running out. 

 

Has any one here who has come to realize that they like myself are on the final stretch managed to find an antidote that at least makes you feel better , less stressed out and more acceptable of the  approaching inevitable outcome.   If you have found an antidote could you please share it 

[marcusarelus]

I used to write more and still have many things to share but I have stopped.  I don't like the criticism that writing brings.  One of my children says something or posts something on facebook incredibly stupid and I no longer even comment.  Why start a fight.  My wife does something outrageous and I just blow it off.  Old friends try to talk to me about Trump or some other idiot and I turn off my ears.  I take my dog for a walk and talk to her.  I watch the Thai people and that is an endless source of amusement.  I cook more.  I made the mistake of recommending a wine here and 4 people started a fight with me about my taste in wine.  No winning so why bother.  If I got depressed I'd talk to my doctor about some anti depressants - a lot of mild ones out there now.  My mom took some after her second stroke and she was nicer than she had been in her whole life - people could actually tolerate her and some even started liking her.   

[NCC1701A]

17 minutes ago, Whip Me Granny said:

I am now becoming more and more aware that my time on earth is running out .

I'm 63 and I told my girlfriend that every month I am traveling somewhere alone because she can't come with me due to her business. 

 

I still can ride my motorcycle but every year it gets heavier. :)

 

I am in very good health and I am going to keep banging away until I drop.

[Kwasaki]

17 minutes ago, Whip Me Granny said:

If you have found an antidote could you please share it 

Yeah I'm changing my m/c cause it's too slow and next one I will keep and still be riding it at 85 + is what's on my mind.

[CharlieH]

"So I was wondering what other forum members here who are also getting on in years like my self are doing to try and combat any similar thoughts.  Have you also reached a point in your life where you now know like me that your time on earth is slowly running out."

 

 

Easy, just forget it ! dont think too far ahead, enjoy the now.

We all have a "use by date" we just dont know what it is, and when it arrives thats it.

So, dont worry about what might happen, concentrate on what is happening.

Its only a problem if you allow it to be.

[emptypockets]

I think part of the problem is people retiring. After a lifetime of working suddenly a lot of things stop.

Work is much more than simply turning up and getting paid.

There is the social and spiritual aspect to work (not the god bothering spiritual type) but the good feeling for me spiritual thing - I feel valued thing. A sense of worth.

 

Men need 3,000 interactions a day (interactions meaning talking , phone calls etc etc) women need 5,000 interactions.  Did you ever wonder why you came home from work knackered and the wife just wanted to blah blah blah?... Now you know!!

 

I'm 63 and love the job I have in a country close to Thailand. See the wife every three weeks for two weeks or so.

Keeps me intellectually on the top of my game.

 

To the OP - find a challenge.....buy a telescope and try and find a new comet!

Download the Pacer app to your phone - try and walk 10,000 steps a day.

 

 

Keep your brain active after all it is the second most important male organ (joking)

[onera1961]

why fret over silly things in the country of brothels and pimps (fronting as bars). Go to a brothel and spend sometime. All worries will fade away. 

[brokenbone]

no girl is ever going to be intimate with you again

so why would you want to linger on in this nasty place ?

the only thing left is pain, cramps, digestive issues and so forth,

thank goodness youre soon outa here.

only catch is the moment you exit,

have a nice one

Edited June 25, 2019 by brokenbone

[elliss]

48 minutes ago, CharlieH said:

Easy, just forget it ! dont think too far ahead, enjoy the now.

We all have a "use by date" we just dont know what it is, and when it arrives thats it.

So, dont worry about what might happen, concentrate on what is happening.

Its only a problem if you allow it to be.

 

    Really ?.  should we not prepare for the health issues , old age brings .

   Dementia , Parkies , and everything else , that comes with old age .

   Bearing in mind , that we farlangs , generally live longer than thai men .

  How would our thai wifes / partners , cope with this , would they want to ??.

        

   I  have known , many brit farangs , faced with no hope ,

  have bought a one way ticket , home to the UK , to die,  thanks NHS hospice.

 

        Ignore it,   until it happens to you ..

 

 

Edited June 25, 2019 by elliss
spelling

[Puchaiyank]

With your lifestyle...you could live to be 90 or more...life is what you make of it...happiness comes from within...don't worry...be happy!   ????

[geoffbezoz]

You are as old as you feel.  Very true saying for most people. Which is exactly why you should have a GF/wife at least 40 to 50 years younger than yourself. Then when you feel her you feel young ????????

[BritManToo]

8 hours ago, Whip Me Granny said:

So I was wondering what other forum members here who are also getting on in years like my self are doing to try and combat any similar thoughts.  Have you also reached a point in your life where you now know like me that your time on earth is slowly running out. 

At 63 I've had enough and will welcome death (but not illness).

Why keep going, I've done everything I wanted.

[Lacessit]

It is what it is, no point to stressing about it. Eat healthy, have regular sex, exercise and moderate the alcohol consumption. Keep the mind active by reading TV posts.

[BritManToo]

8 hours ago, brokenbone said:

no girl is ever going to be intimate with you again

so why would you want to linger on in this nasty place ?

the only thing left is pain, cramps, digestive issues and so forth,

thank goodness youre soon outa here.

only catch is the moment you exit,

have a nice one

I sort of agree with the whole, but not with your first sentence.

My 30s+ gf is 'intimate' with me fairly often, and my former Thai wife, and earlier this year I've managed to be fairly 'intimate' with 6 different Khmer ladies and 2 Viet ladies mostly in their 20s. Although lately it's more I can't be bothered.

Edited June 26, 2019 by BritManToo

[BritManToo]

8 hours ago, CharlieH said:

We all have a "use by date" we just dont know what it is, and when it arrives thats it.

My use by date was age 52, the next 11 years I've spent in the skip behind the supermarket.

[wisperone]

Ponce de Leon was looking for the antidote also. Look where it got him.

[AlexRich]

When I think of all the great historical figures of the past, those that have really left their mark on this world, I realise that they all have one thing in common ... they’re dead. No one escapes it, so why worry about something that is not within your control? Be thankful that you have reached your 70’s in good health. Enjoy each day as if it were your last, as one day it will be. 

Edited June 26, 2019 by AlexRich

[Lacessit]

23 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

I sort of agree with the whole, but not with your first sentence.

My 30s+ gf is 'intimate' with me fairly often, and my former Thai wife, and earlier this year I've managed to be fairly 'intimate' with 6 different Khmer ladies and 2 Viet ladies mostly in their 20s. Although lately it's more I can't be bothered.

Cheer up. You probably still have Eskimos, Bantus and Mexicans to go.

[Lacessit]

8 hours ago, brokenbone said:

no girl is ever going to be intimate with you again

so why would you want to linger on in this nasty place ?

the only thing left is pain, cramps, digestive issues and so forth,

thank goodness youre soon outa here.

only catch is the moment you exit,

have a nice one

It was predictable this thread would attract a little ray of sunshine.

[canuckamuck]

8 hours ago, emptypockets said:

I think part of the problem is people retiring. After a lifetime of working suddenly a lot of things stop.

Work is much more than simply turning up and getting paid.

There is the social and spiritual aspect to work (not the god bothering spiritual type) but the good feeling for me spiritual thing - I feel valued thing. A sense of worth.

 

Men need 3,000 interactions a day (interactions meaning talking , phone calls etc etc) women need 5,000 interactions.  Did you ever wonder why you came home from work knackered and the wife just wanted to blah blah blah?... Now you know!!

 

I'm 63 and love the job I have in a country close to Thailand. See the wife every three weeks for two weeks or so.

Keeps me intellectually on the top of my game.

 

To the OP - find a challenge.....buy a telescope and try and find a new comet!

Download the Pacer app to your phone - try and walk 10,000 steps a day.

 

 

Keep your brain active after all it is the second most important male organ (joking)

3000 interactions a day would kill me dead. 100 is about my limit. 

[yogi100]

Jesus WMG, it's a depressing subject that we should try to not think about even thought it is often in the back of all of our minds.

 

My advice is try to not dwell on it. Occupy your frame of mind with other matters. Read a book, watch films and go on the internet. Dwelling on death will only lead to despair and depression. Try and make the most of the here and now rather than think about what might be round the corner.

 

One of my pals in Pattaya is 84 in July yet he soldiers on and walks a couple of hours every day and even gets other blokes' shopping for them. He has no phone nor a PC but talks to people all the time and when he's not gossiping he's reading books.

[samuttodd]

1.Puppy

2.Motorcycle

[sweatalot]

59 minutes ago, yogi100 said:

My advice is try to not dwell on it

# OP:

good advice.

I wouldn't say you are suffering from depression.

 

What you are suffering from is wrong thinking. What you dwell on in your thoughts makes your mood - be it bad or good. If you can't think on feeling young and feeling good think about something that is different from what makes you feel bad. Remember nice experiences in the past - experience  them again in your mind - remember that good feeling. Or think about a nice holiday that you will allow yourself, about your favourite soccer team, a nice sex session with a professionel lady (or boy -whatever your preference is) ... or read a funny book and let your thoughts be inpired by it. Just don't think about what makes you feel bad. 

 

Edited June 26, 2019 by sweatalot

[wgdanson]

1 hour ago, BritManToo said:

At 63 I've had enough and will welcome death (but not illness).

Why keep going, I've done everything I wanted.

If you welcome death, there are many ways you could make that wish come true.

[xylophone]

10 hours ago, Whip Me Granny said:

Now Ive reached the age of 70 I’m starting to become more and more distraught and stressed out .

10 hours ago, Whip Me Granny said:

No matter what I try I just can’t seem to get that nagging    ‘’ my time is running out ‘’    thought out of my mind to a point where its now become a daily battle. 

 

10 hours ago, Whip Me Granny said:

Has any one here who has come to realize that they like myself are on the final stretch managed to find an antidote that at least makes you feel better , less stressed out and more acceptable of the  approaching inevitable outcome.

You are stressed out because you are thinking about your time running out, so stop doing it!!

 

Once you accept that your demise is inevitable and that you have absolutely no control over it in the main, then you can start living without worrying.

 

There were many hippie and new age books in the 60s and 70s which encouraged people to "live in the now", "live for today", "live in the moment" and similar and that mindset has helped me now that I'm approaching 72, and I have also seen many friends popping their clogs, so it is all around us and it is part of life, so accept it.

 

It sounds like you are trying to fight the inevitable which will always lead to conflict within your mind, because it's something you cannot do.

 

My approach is that every day is a new day and I will do things that I like.........catch up with friends, shop for ingredients for a new meal I want to try, say hello to the nice-looking young women in the shopping malls, have a 90 minute professional massage and so on, or perhaps just go for a drive in my car, simply because I like driving.

 

I am in regular contact with friends via email and Skype and enjoy the occasional shopping trip and lunch with my Thai daughter who lives in Phuket town.

 

I have a hobby which is wine, and I drink nice wine and also explore wine shops for wines and I don't know, then do some research on them to learn more about where they come from and how they are made.

 

I keep myself busy to a certain extent, and I have put in place my NZ Will and my Thai Will so that all will be taken care of when I do depart this mortal coil, so in reality I have no worries, focusing on welcoming and enjoying every day as it comes.

 

Take a short-term view on things and enjoy the day if not the hour, visit restaurants you've always wanted to go to and give yourself a treat, make it worthwhile getting up in the morning to greet each new day and don't worry about the future, because it will take care of itself.

[Denim]

10 hours ago, NCC1701A said:

 

I am in very good health and I am going to keep banging away until I drop.

 

Or it drops , whichever comes soonest , no pun intended.

[bert bloggs]

I think about it as well ,but as long as its quick ,it will not be a problem , i know my wife worries about me as she is a good bit younger ,and no its not about the money ,she will have no problems ,its just the fact of losing me ,mind you the thought of anything happening to her is far worse ,i much prefere to go first .

[faraday]

As post #24 says, get a puppy.

 

We bought one 3 months ago, & have little time to think of anything else. He's very demanding, quite wonderful, & keeps us fit.

 

[Orton Rd]

Life, like women, sex and money is over rated.

[shackleton]

Well I did not have any thoughts on it  until I read your article

I have my daily routine here out for the afternoon walking exercise ect ( keeps the weight down ) 

which some people will say its boring but each to his own

will let you know next year when I reach that young age of 70