My Thai Wifes Iphone Addiction.

[CaptainCarrot]

On 5/10/2020 at 6:53 AM, thaibeachlovers said:

5555555555555555

In case you hadn't noticed the OP is in LOS. It's not a western country. Farang's problems are usually because they behave like they are married to a western woman. For sure that was my mistake.

I certainly follow the traditional western approach.

[hanuman2543]

On 4/26/2020 at 4:50 PM, plumberman123 said:

your wife is probablt keeping in contact with her Thai husband and other 'friends'

 

drop her like a bad habit and get a younger model in

After 22 years of marriage at 64? Or didn't you read careful enough?

[Tie Dye Samurai]

On 4/22/2020 at 9:17 PM, Gweiloman said:

She is 64 and you still expect her to cook for you and to do household chores? Is she your slave? Employ a maid, for crying out loud. 

And maybe she should hire a mint to print out her baht every month....for crying out loud.

[Tie Dye Samurai]

First of all I am not married and fortunately have never been married because of this very thing...it would drive me crazy that the phone is more important than anything else, including and especially me (her life partner). I think it is incredibly disrespectful on her part especially if you have provided her with a life that she obviously must be happy with for 22 years or she would be gone...I am not talking about the cooking or the cleaning but in my opinion she has a responsibility and the OP should have the expectation and demand that she be present in the relationship.......SO:

 

I am going to run with the premise that you paid for her iphone, her phone plan and\or the wifi in your place...stop paying for her phone plan and change the password on the wifi (its your wifi after all, you pay for it). You will get her attention pretty quick...tell her the phone plan and wifi comes back on when she can explain to you why the phone is more important than anything else...and if she wont talk about it or ignores you or throws a thai girl temper tantrum, let her limp along with her iphone like that until she comes around or refuses to come around...either she will modify her behavior or she will leave to go find her internet addiction elsewhere...then you can get an account on Thai Friendly and put the saved money from the cancelled phone plan toward your new subscription on Thai Friendly.

 

"You know what you feed a dray horse in the morning if you want a day's work out of him? Just enough so he knows he is hungry."
 

[DaRoadrunner]

On 4/23/2020 at 10:32 AM, cranki said:

From the iPhone 7 onwards I think they were made water resistant...iPhone 7 could be submerged in up to a meter of water for up to 30 minutes

How long can you submerge a wife under water?

[Tie Dye Samurai]

On 4/24/2020 at 5:25 AM, ben2talk said:

So you agree that women are the slaves, just lighten the married one with a maid?

 

What I noticed is that she demands financial support... that's funny. It doesn't sound as if you have a close relationship, so you don't have much to talk about - so what's the problem?

 

You're out of order, but so are many other married couples... finances should be a joint venture - it doesn't matter who earns what, it's family income. Similarly chores, cooking and cleaning, should be done by whoever is available.

 

So you take care of your <deleted> and leave her to stay in her own room and play with her phone in peace.

Their finances are not a joint venture because he is the only one bringing finances to the relationship...what you mean is SPENDING the finances are a joint venture. And if the only thing she is expected to bring to the relationship is sex....then SLAVE is not the word you are looking for. So he is the only one available to bring in financial resources but everything else except for internet surfing (which she seems to be in charge of) is based on whomever is available (which is not her because surfing the internet takes all her time)...

 

So lets recap that: he needs to bring in the money because he is the only one "available" to do that....she gets equal access to it....all the chores should be done by "whomever is available" but she is not available because she is on her phone the whole time. So basically he should bring in all the money, do all the chores...."But dont worry teelak, I'll make sure the internet does not blow up, I'm watching it 24/7 just for you Teelak"

 

I bet he is her Tech Support as well....because she is not "available"

[thaibeachlovers]

12 hours ago, kenk24 said:

Thats ridiculous... there is a financial aspect to many of our relationships, but it is just an aspect... and it changes... I take care of a niece and pay for everything for her... she is a daughter and student, not an employee and owes me nothing... I give $ to mom and dad, they worked hard all of their lives and had little but took great care of their family... they owe me nothing.. I have helped many family members... and they hold no obligation... 

 

Have you never had the experience of helping someone and wanting nothing in return? 

Have you never had the experience of helping someone and wanting nothing in return? 

Of course. Did so all my life. I helped people by doing stuff for them, like fixing their car, or installing a pool heating system for free. More instances of helping others than I can remember.

In LOS I helped my family by rewiring ( at my own expense ) 3 houses, paving the back yard and doing plumbing work on their rental properties.

They were better off than I, but when they demanded ( through my wife ) much cash money that was it for me. My wife never supported me against them, so she got divorced.

 

How many farangs supported their in laws if they were married in a western country? Few, I'll bet. So why is an in law different in LOS?

 

You come across as a rich man that can afford to support others- not all of us are. Do any of those you give money to say thank you? I never got anything but disdain from my Thai in laws, and in one case being treated badly, but again my wife never did anything to support me against her family. A wife that puts her husband last is no wife, but a exploiter.

 

 

[1FinickyOne]

11 minutes ago, thaibeachlovers said:

How many farangs supported their in laws if they were married in a western country? Few, I'll bet. So why is an in law different in LOS?

yes, I helped out my MIL in USA when she had financial problems... it is different here because families are most often much closer units than in Western Countries... my wife has always given to her parents from the time she was 12 and had to drop out of school to send money home to help feed her younger sisters. She still feels responsible to help her family have a better life and I am pleased to help with that too...

 

14 minutes ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Do any of those you give money to say thank you?

And surely you know the culture here well enough to know that the thank you is not verbalized, but is there in many ways if your eyes are open...

 

I am sorry you had a rotten experience w/your wife's family... not sure why anyone would do all those things for people and then complain about it later... maybe there is another side to the story? 

[Tie Dye Samurai]

1 hour ago, thaibeachlovers said:

 

In LOS I helped my family by rewiring ( at my own expense ) 3 houses, paving the back yard and doing plumbing work on their rental properties.

They were better off than I, but when they demanded ( through my wife ) much cash money that was it for me. My wife never supported me against them, so she got divorced.

 

 

They have rental properties but they need your money as well...that about sums it up. One thing I have never understood is that farang is always supposed to respect and bow down to Thai culture in a marriage (in other words give money to everybody that asks for it on the in laws side of the family)....where is the respect and understanding of the farang's culture? Alot of guys in this thread have said "You messed up because you expected a thai wife to act like a western wife". Where is the other side of the coin that The Thai woman and her family should know and respect the man's culture?

 

Why doesnt that door swing both ways and why do some of these men in this thread not acknowledge that?

[colinneil]

7 minutes ago, Tie Dye Samurai said:

They have rental properties but they need your money as well...that about sums it up. One thing I have never understood is that farang is always supposed to respect and bow down to Thai culture in a marriage (in other words give money to everybody that asks for it on the in laws side of the family)....where is the respect and understanding of the farang's culture? Alot of guys in this thread have said "You messed up because you expected a thai wife to act like a western wife". Where is the other side of the coin that The Thai woman and her family should know and respect the man's culture?

 

Why doesnt that door swing both ways and why do some of these men in this thread not acknowledge that?

Your post is very confusing, you claim never to have been married, but you claim to know everything a farang is supposed to do in his marriage to a Thai lady.

Give money to the outlaws, dont be silly, i give the outlaws absolutely nothing

You say, why doesnt the door swing both ways, well mate in my marriage it does, wife goes shopping she pays, i go shopping i pay.

All household bills are taken care of jointly.

[Matzzon]

On 4/23/2020 at 3:57 AM, Mason45 said:

Hi there, My 64 yo Thai wife has become totally addicted to her Iphone in recent years. Prior to that she was an extra good cook and was right on the ball when it came to normal household chores. Now every single thing is DIY but she still demands total financial support. She boots up her Iphone around 4am daily and it's still going till at least 9pm before it's shut down. I'm quite prepared to move out and not return but after being married for 22 years it's not easy.

Let´s play this out! Sounds like a funny subject to elaborate on. ????

She is 64 which actually means close to the age for pension and retirement. How old are you?

As you seem to admit in your OP she have been serving you, cooking food and taking care of the house as well as possible kids for 22 years. That is considered like an eligible time span for having a pension or social security check if this was considered working. What about you? Do you consider that your wife servicing you, the possible kids and the house for all these years to be compared to a work? Is she then eligible for pension, a.k.a. financial support from you?

What do you do during the days. Are you retired? Have you been working as she have for many years in your life? Do you get your check and your freedom now?
Do you have any addiction like drinking everyday, running off the see your foreign friends or just sitting looking at the TV in home demanding that your wife service you until she dies?

Maybe you should consider getting up and share the household chores with her. You are probably both at the age of retirement or over. That would be fair to your relation at the stage it is in today. Who knows! Maybe your wife would get the fire back and see that you want to be a part of her life. My belief is that she is probably just very tired of doing everything herself.

If I am wrong, feel free to point that out. Maybe you are a guy that are helping out with everything in home. if not, it´s 2020 and it´s time to keep up with the time lost like 50 years ago.

[bluesofa]

46 minutes ago, colinneil said:

Your post is very confusing, you claim never to have been married, but you claim to know everything a farang is supposed to do in his marriage to a Thai lady.

Give money to the outlaws, dont be silly, i give the outlaws absolutely nothing

You say, why doesnt the door swing both ways, well mate in my marriage it does, wife goes shopping she pays, i go shopping i pay.

All household bills are taken care of jointly.

Nah, you're doing it wrong. I'm a kept man.

[Matzzon]

4 hours ago, Tie Dye Samurai said:

They have rental properties but they need your money as well...that about sums it up. One thing I have never understood is that farang is always supposed to respect and bow down to Thai culture in a marriage (in other words give money to everybody that asks for it on the in laws side of the family)....where is the respect and understanding of the farang's culture? Alot of guys in this thread have said "You messed up because you expected a thai wife to act like a western wife". Where is the other side of the coin that The Thai woman and her family should know and respect the man's culture?

 

Why doesnt that door swing both ways and why do some of these men in this thread not acknowledge that?

Sounds to me like you have zero knowledge of things in Thailand and that you are totally fresh when it comes to Thai culture and the way of living in the country.

If you knew anything, you would not have to ask so strange questions. Thailand is exactly like other countries and cultures. They have a diversity. It´s also possible to form your relation with Thailand and Thai people, as it is in any country. Where in the world do you get your information from. You have to stop read pure science fiction.

[Tie Dye Samurai]

6 hours ago, colinneil said:

Your post is very confusing, you claim never to have been married, but you claim to know everything a farang is supposed to do in his marriage to a Thai lady.

Give money to the outlaws, dont be silly, i give the outlaws absolutely nothing

You say, why doesnt the door swing both ways, well mate in my marriage it does, wife goes shopping she pays, i go shopping i pay.

All household bills are taken care of jointly.

I do not claim to know everything...where did I claim that? I have my opinions and I qualified that in full disclosure of my marital situation. And I dont remember speaking about your marriage specifically....mate.

 

[Tie Dye Samurai]

1 hour ago, Matzzon said:

Sounds to me like you have zero knowledge of things in Thailand and that you are totally fresh when it comes to Thai culture and the way of living in the country.

If you knew anything, you would not have to ask so strange questions. Thailand is exactly like other countries and cultures. They have a diversity. It´s also possible to form your relation with Thailand and Thai people, as it is in any country. Where in the world do you get your information from. You have to stop read pure science fiction.

Lived here for more than three years, I have a good handle on the Thai culture and I have my opinions on marriage as well. So I do know "something". What question was so strange that I asked? (By the way, the guy I was responding to got divorced...and his in laws who have rental properties were still trying to get money out of him when he even said they were better off than him. If he was family and they were better off than him, why were they still trying to get money out of him instead of helping him or just leaving him be). My point is that why cant the woman understand she is married to a western man and maybe could be understanding of his background and experiences. Why does it have to always be the Thai way or the highway?

 

Seriously, if you are happy being married and the parameters of your relationship, then that is a good thing. But you do not have to insult me because I have a different opinion and was willing to share it and qualify my marital status.

[Matzzon]

2 hours ago, Tie Dye Samurai said:

Lived here for more than three years, I have a good handle on the Thai culture and I have my opinions on marriage as well. So I do know "something". What question was so strange that I asked? (By the way, the guy I was responding to got divorced...and his in laws who have rental properties were still trying to get money out of him when he even said they were better off than him. If he was family and they were better off than him, why were they still trying to get money out of him instead of helping him or just leaving him be). My point is that why cant the woman understand she is married to a western man and maybe could be understanding of his background and experiences. Why does it have to always be the Thai way or the highway?

 

Seriously, if you are happy being married and the parameters of your relationship, then that is a good thing. But you do not have to insult me because I have a different opinion and was willing to share it and qualify my marital status.

Oh my god! Really??? The full amount of three years. Fantastic! Come back and start the conversation in another 20 years. This is very easy, and I can tell you exactly why I dealt with you like I did. It´s because you just repeat yourself and are unwilling to understand. Please look below:

2 hours ago, Tie Dye Samurai said:

Why does it have to always be the Thai way or the highway?

That was just what I was posting and replying to you about. It is not always like that. Actually it´s more uncommon than common, but you don´t hear the happy people complaining, right? That is what you have to understand. The ones that gets into this problems and bad relationships have made all the wrong choices, and are not capable to take care of business and steer up a relation the way the wish to form it and are totally unable to set up rules and don´ts from start.

So, what you are yelling out as something it always have to be, is just pure fantasy and just a very small percent of all relationships between foreigners and Thais. Most of us are capable to make the right decisions in life and build a working relationship. That is the reason why I stand hard as a rock regarding my opinion that you do not have a clue, and that you definitely will need the 20 year extra as already advised.

Here you have another part of your reasoning:

2 hours ago, Tie Dye Samurai said:

Seriously, if you are happy being married and the parameters of your relationship, then that is a good thing. But you do not have to insult me because I have a different opinion and was willing to share it and qualify my marital status.

Yes, I am happy! Why wouldn´t I be? I do not live after the parameters that you are posting about. They belong to the small percentage of people complaining about their relationship. You know, the ones you hear about. It will take you many more years in Thailand to really get a grip of the reality and come in contact with all the happy people, and the ones that actually lives a healthy and equal relationship as husband and wife. You will definitely not find that information by forming your opinions about thing by reading the comments in this forum. It´s overloaded with complainers.

You have a different opinion. Yes and no. That because you can not build an opinion without living here longer time and listening and collecting information from both sides of life. From the majority that makes the right decisions and the minority that makes the wrong ones.

At last, what in the world do you mean with willing to share and qualify your marital status? 

[Matzzon]

19 hours ago, Tie Dye Samurai said:

First of all I am not married and fortunately have never been married

I wont even start to ask why. You have summarized that perfect yourself in the rest of the post. Fortunately probably was made up when you realized it was an impossible mission.
 

19 hours ago, Tie Dye Samurai said:

Their finances are not a joint venture

It should be after 22 years, if only one in a relationship has the income. That usually means that the other part has been working taking care of the home and possible children during that time. That is also work and should be seen as that. What you are saying is that she should continue work until she fall down and die, and that the work she have been doing do not qualify for pension.
 

3 hours ago, Tie Dye Samurai said:

I do not claim to know everything.

You do not need to claim that, because it surely looks that way by reading and seeing the amount of posts in a thread about marriage and relationships from a guy who never been married. You surely have all the experience and knowledge in the world to keep on posting. Keep it up! At least it funny reading.

[1FinickyOne]

On 5/23/2020 at 9:51 AM, Tie Dye Samurai said:

Where is the other side of the coin that The Thai woman and her family should know and respect the man's culture?

If they chose to live in the "mans" culture, they probably would... but they are born here, will die here, it really isn't their responsibility.. I know Thai ladies who have married farang in Western Countries [not been brought back there] and they Westernized and did not insist and throw hissy fits because farangs weren't acting Thai... 

[Tie Dye Samurai]

On 5/23/2020 at 7:21 AM, Matzzon said:

Oh my god! Really??? The full amount of three years. Fantastic! Come back and start the conversation in another 20 years.

Didnt realize there was a year living in country requirement to be in this discussion...and again with the insults....nice. Why are you so hostile because you and I have a different opinion when I have not attacked you at all?

[Tie Dye Samurai]

4 hours ago, kenk24 said:

If they chose to live in the "mans" culture, they probably would... but they are born here, will die here, it really isn't their responsibility.. I know Thai ladies who have married farang in Western Countries [not been brought back there] and they Westernized and did not insist and throw hissy fits because farangs weren't acting Thai... 

Now that I can understand and when you put it like that, it does make sense. Thank you for sharing that with me, you have given me something to think about and I appreciate it.

[1FinickyOne]

10 hours ago, Tie Dye Samurai said:

Now that I can understand and when you put it like that, it does make sense. Thank you for sharing that with me, you have given me something to think about and I appreciate it.

Thanks Tie Dye... most country Thai are simple people... they don't travel much and surely not out of Thailand - they have no foundation to understand a different culture at any depth and really are not that interested... it is meaningless until and unless they come in contact as we farang bring it to them. And then, from what I see in my family, they will judge you by your actions... individually. And there are so many different Western Cultures out there.. 

 

I have one Burmese brother in law and he is poor but a really kind helpful guy... he is treated well, as am I for different reasons. I bring different abilities to the table. I have a car and part of what makes me family is that I will drop everything and drive a family member to the hospital and along with other family sit with them all night. You get back what you put in. But these things often take time to play out... 

 

And I don't need or expect them to Westernize... I have elderly family who don't even speak Thai.. and all that said, it is nice that my wife will make me a hamburger sometimes, etc.. so, some give and take is nice, but mostly, the adapting and assimilating is on me. 

 

[Matzzon]

10 hours ago, Tie Dye Samurai said:

Didnt realize there was a year living in country requirement to be in this discussion...and again with the insults....nice. Why are you so hostile because you and I have a different opinion when I have not attacked you at all?

When did I write it was a living in the country requirement to be in the discussion? The answer is never.

What I am posting that you need more years to collect the knowledge you need. That as well as you are totally without experience about the subject you are posting in, is the things that makes you unfit for this thread. The only thing you have been doing to form your opinion is reading here and heard others complain, because you not hear anything from the happy ones. It´s just a barstool opinion, and nothing else.

[Tie Dye Samurai]

5 hours ago, Matzzon said:

That as well as you are totally without experience about the subject you are posting in, is the things that makes you unfit for this thread. The only thing you have been doing to form your opinion is reading here and heard others complain, because you not hear anything from the happy ones. It´s just a barstool opinion, and nothing else.

How obnoxious to assume all of my life experience when it comes to the Thais and marriage are based solely and only on this thread to the point I am "unfit" to post. Get over yourself, you are obnoxious in the way you present your arguments that are laced with insults and personal attacks when you do not know me, to the point I could give a cr*p what else you have to say and I feel sorry for your wife if that is what she has dealt with for 20+ years. You dont know how long I have been coming to Thailand and how long I was here before I decided to move, who I hear from, deal with and have been exposed to, you have no idea how I have come to my opinions, you have zero clue about much except how to get on TV and speculate about other people based on two or three posts and hide behind your keyboard in Issan and run your mouth. I am not responding to you anymore....go change your soiled depends you sanctimonious old git.

 

[Matzzon]

7 hours ago, Tie Dye Samurai said:

How obnoxious to assume all of my life experience when it comes to the Thais and marriage are based solely and only on this thread to the point I am "unfit" to post.

Again! I never posted that I assume that. If I did please show me, but you can´t.
 

Quote

Get over yourself, you are obnoxious in the way you present your arguments that are laced with insults and personal attacks when you do not know me, to the point I could give a cr*p what else you have to say and I feel sorry for your wife if that is what she has dealt with for 20+ years. You dont know how long I have been coming to Thailand and how long I was here before I decided to move, who I hear from, deal with and have been exposed to, you have no idea how I have come to my opinions, you have zero clue about much except how to get on TV and speculate about other people based on two or three posts and hide behind your keyboard in Issan and run your mouth. I am not responding to you anymore....go change your soiled depends you sanctimonious old git.

 

So, I am an old git that have a wife you feel sorry for. Ok, that´s great. ???????? (She is very happy by the way, just out of the simple reason she meet a guy with his feet on the ground that do not assume untrue things about Thai people. She is also very happy over that I do not blame all Thai for the wrongs a few do. You know, same like in every country.)

 

Instead of repeating yourself about everything else. Please feel free to tell about all that I/we don´t know, so it´s easier to understand what you base your precious knowledge on.

[BritManToo]

Every night I prise the TV remote out of my sons hand and firmly tell him 'BED'.

Then I remove the phone out of my gfs hand and tell her 'SLEEP'.

 

My son complains less than my gf.

[Matzzon]

23 hours ago, Tie Dye Samurai said:

Now that I can understand and when you put it like that, it does make sense. Thank you for sharing that with me, you have given me something to think about and I appreciate it.

So, does that mean that you had no clue about different cultures and living long time in different cultures before?