11 minutes ago, AlfHuy said:

I'm 55.

Not so much a difference but still 17 years.

What disturbs me the most is the aggresivity. Never seen something like that before.

On top, she is extremely jealous.

I tell you what I think out of my experience. Mine was aggressive too and jealous. I think often she could not do what she wanted and tried to obey what wasn't always easy. And she was worried that she would lose my support. I understood her situation and accepted it. Despite of all this I had a great time with this not so easy girl. It wasn't boring. 

 

 

Edited August 13, 20205 yr by Oldie

Quote

I told her. Now you behave a bit. I am the breadwinner. I put the money on the table.

With that kind of attitude what do you expect?

1 hour ago, AlfHuy said:

I gave her the last warning. Next act like this and I help her doing her luggage and escorting her to the lobby.

Not sure if she agrees too much with your method

 

reading your posts you can be prepared to a crisis big time

with a lot of screaming and crying, plus the risk of an human tornado

ravaging your condo.

 

You could even be wounded in the process

 

A short tempered angry bird with low IQ, knowing it's the last act, don't think too

much at the consequences of her actions in the heat of the fight

 

If i was you, i would prefer the ''soft'' method ''thai style''

to avoid the risky confrontation face to face in a close area

 

 

1\be sure she hasn't the keys of your condo

2\wait the moment where for any reason she is outside alone

3\pack all her belongings and depose the lot to the lobby

4\inform the lobby you are not anymore with her and she is not

allowed to enter to see you

5\ before she is back, take your way out for a short holiday

(4 or 5 days is enough) in another destination at minimum 20 or 30 kms from your place

6\ comeback and enjoy your new freedom

of course don't forget to cut ALL the links with her

(Phone, Line, FB and so on)

Edited August 13, 20205 yr by kingofthemountain

1 hour ago, AlfHuy said:

Next act like this and I help her doing her luggage and escorting her to the lobby.

first time my ex girlfriend had a fit and was shouting, crying and throwing things around I just waited until she was done..

then I told her to pack her stuff because she would be on the first minivan out next morning.

 

she spent most of the night crying and begging, i didn't budge. sent her early the next day.

long story short, her dummy friends told her to "find someone else to forget him" and that tourist dude got her pregnant one week after meeting.

 

oh well.

Edited August 13, 20205 yr by kekalot
words

Tell her that if she doesn't calm down you are going to go and clean the toilet..............with her tooth brush.

1 hour ago, AlfHuy said:

Girlfriend is not able to have a meaningful discussion. Concentration seems to last only 15 min.

Trying to explain something is useless.

She is extremely short tempered, shouts extremely loud and quite aggressive. 

I never came across something like this during my relationships with non Asians.

Hitting etc.... never seen something like that before.

Sounds like every Asian lady I ever dated for longer than an hour or two.

Forget discussion/mansplaining, all Asians view that as confrontation and will react with anger and/or violence.

Endure or dump ....... up to you, it never gets better, only worse.

Just now, BritManToo said:

Sounds like every Asian lady I ever dated for longer than an hour or two.

Forget discussion/mansplaining, all Asians view that as confrontation and will react with anger and/or violence.

Endure or dump ....... up to you, it never gets better, only worse.

Perhaps they didn't like you, or your attitude, or your flip-flops.....????

If you are older and need someone to talk to you could try this

 

 

1 hour ago, AlfHuy said:

Girlfriend is not able to have a meaningful discussion. Concentration seems to last only 15 min.

Trying to explain something is useless.

She is extremely short tempered, shouts extremely loud and quite aggressive. 

I never came across something like this during my relationships with non Asians.

Hitting etc.... never seen something like that before.

Once the anger has gone, she is lovely again.

I don't know if I take this any longer.

I told her. Now you behave a bit. I am the breadwinner. I put the money on the table.

Or you behave like an adult or you walk.

I agree with many here that it will be very difficult to make your situation better again. But in general, and maybe for next time, my 2 cents:

 

Concentration for 1/4 hour sounds great!

 

Trying to explain: It seems that whatever you (and many of us) try to explain is seen by them as accusing them of being stupid, etc. So whatever you try to say will be blocked right away for that reason. If you have to explain something try to do it as non-confrontational as possible.

 

Short tempered: Always? My gf has that problem if she is hungry and a few days a months. Don't discuss anything while she is hungry and avoid those days.

 

I told her: Telling is not enough. Show her the door and make sure she realizes that you mean it.

 

Good luck - you need it!

8 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

I agree with many here that it will be very difficult to make your situation better again. But in general, and maybe for next time, my 2 cents:

 

Concentration for 1/4 hour sounds great!

 

Trying to explain: It seems that whatever you (and many of us) try to explain is seen by them as accusing them of being stupid, etc. So whatever you try to say will be blocked right away for that reason. If you have to explain something try to do it as non-confrontational as possible.

 

Short tempered: Always? My gf has that problem if she is hungry and a few days a months. Don't discuss anything while she is hungry and avoid those days.

 

I told her: Telling is not enough. Show her the door and make sure she realizes that you mean it.

 

Good luck - you need it!

A few times, she told me: FOR SURE, I WILL GO. 

This never has happened lol.

To comfy here. Farang paying all the bills, going on holidays, restaurants, cinema, having a car etc.

Going back to her old life won't be so comfortable (even though she says, that her old life was much better). I told her, off you go, back to your 1 room. 

Not seeing her to live soon 555

For the moment, not talking at all. We went 1 week to HuaHin on a holiday. Last few days, not talking.

I have enough of this rubbish. I didn't come here after having worked hard all live to be told, what to do.

Unfortunately, due to this covid rubbish, dividend income stream is very low and thanks, that there are savings and other income.

Just now, AlfHuy said:

For the moment, not talking at all. We went 1 week to HuaHin on a holiday. Last few days, not talking.

Go on holiday alone, lots of hungry Thai ladies wherever you go, who are happy to make the effort to please you.

I remember my (former) Thai misses throwing a wobbly when I took her on holiday.

Never took her (or anyone else) on holiday since, always found company there. 

Edited August 13, 20205 yr by BritManToo

1 minute ago, AlfHuy said:

To comfy here. Farang paying all the bills, going on holidays, restaurants, cinema, having a car etc.

Then stop paying!

If you tell her "behave!" and she does not do that and then you continue to pay for everything what do you expect? 

She learns (and very quickly) that you talk but don't cut the money.

Next time go on to the cinema or restaurant without her (even if you don't like it). 

Holiday? Take a few days holiday from her. Leave her 200B per day so she can eat and that's it. She won't like that.

And then tell her: take it or leave it.

There is always one boss in any relationship with a Thai woman. And if you are not the boss then she is the boss. Up to you if you want to live like that.

I just treat it like a quite game of chess,study your opponent and try and make the best moves you can and try and outwit them without getting emotional or demanding,try and enjoy the battle,she's testing you.

Edited August 13, 20205 yr by FarFlungFalang

1 hour ago, AlfHuy said:

I told her, she can be lucky that I have an education

sure, that is a good approach - angry spouses always like to hear about your assets... 

 

what would she be saying to her friends about what makes her unhappy? What is her side of the story - would you guess? Or do you know? 

you need to enforce a  correlation between her behavior and the money you

hand out in her favor. deduct 500 baht for any symptom and only 3 things can happen,

all in your favor

 

1] she behave to get them dollars rolling

 

2] she dont behave and you keep your money

 

3] she leave and you keep all your money, and as a bonus you wont hear her

Just now, kenk24 said:

sure, that is a good approach - angry spouses always like to hear about your assets... 

 

what would she be saying to her friends about what makes her unhappy? What is her side of the story - would you guess? Or do you know? 

Sure:

As she often tells me: she knows many ladies 555 who are together with (especially) old germans, living in Germany and getting every months a minimum of 50,000 baht.

I told her, wowww, tell them to show some evidence. Sure they all live in villas, swimming pool, Porsche etc and a big cash allowance on top. 

I told her, that none of her so called friends would really do a video call to show off this luxurious live or a print out of their bank statement as it is not happening.

They just show off through messages. They don't say that they live in a small apartment and have a 15year old VW Golf.

This would make their friends just laugh as they didn't win the big lottery ticket.

Better to lie then losing face.

I told her as well, off you go, find one of those millionaires who is just waiting to splash his cash around with a Thai.

Her sister, 37 years of age married a 65 year German. For sure she is not happy but accepts now, that this is the only hope she has.

25 minutes ago, AlfHuy said:

For the moment, not talking at all. We went 1 week to HuaHin on a holiday. Last few days, not talking.

I have enough of this rubbish. I didn't come here after having worked hard all live to be told, what to do.

You should have left her in Hua Hin

don't worry too much for her, as soon as she is sure

it's over with you, she will be in the search of another victim\provider

if she is young, attractive and with few talents in the bed, even with the

actual lack of foreigners she should be ok.

 

Maybe she is already working on an emergency exit option

if she is most of the time on her phone and you don't know

what she is doing on the screen, you could be dumped before to dump her lol

 

Another option to speed the process is to cut all the expenses

pretend you don't have fund anymore because of the covid and

stay on a 100\200 bhts budget daily for both of you.

 

If she was used to ''the life'' as you describe, restaurants, holidays and so on

it should be not long before she decides to change of the supplier

2 hours ago, AlfHuy said:

Hitting etc.... never seen something like that before.

Once you signs like this, take note, you have damaged goods, you can not fix what has been broken for a while, take the advice and move on before you get seriously injured.

 

I was once married to a non Asian, started off ok, then the rocky emotional status started showing, usually around period time, well that is what I thought, until one day she hit me with an iron while it was hot, I will leave that at that.

 

A dog can't change it's spots, move on, real quick, but up to you, stay and see what happens, you can only be wasting your time and money.

3 minutes ago, AlfHuy said:

Sure:

As she often tells me: she knows many ladies 555 who are together with (especially) old germans, living in Germany and getting every months a minimum of 50,000 baht.

I told her, wowww, tell them to show some evidence. Sure they all live in villas, swimming pool, Porsche etc and a big cash allowance on top. 

I told her, that none of her so called friends would really do a video call to show off this luxurious live or a print out of their bank statement as it is not happening.

They just show off through messages. They don't say that they live in a small apartment and have a 15year old VW Golf.

This would make their friends just laugh as they didn't win the big lottery ticket.

Better to lie then losing face.

I told her as well, off you go, find one of those millionaires who is just waiting to splash his cash around with a Thai.

Her sister, 37 years of age married a 65 year German. For sure she is not happy but accepts now, that this is the only hope she has.

ok... so you fight about money... there you have it... make more or find someone who wants less... everyone has choices. 

14 minutes ago, AlfHuy said:

Sure:

As she often tells me: she knows many ladies 555 who are together with (especially) old germans, living in Germany and getting every months a minimum of 50,000 baht.

I told her, wowww, tell them to show some evidence. Sure they all live in villas, swimming pool, Porsche etc and a big cash allowance on top. 

I told her, that none of her so called friends would really do a video call to show off this luxurious live or a print out of their bank statement as it is not happening.

They just show off through messages. They don't say that they live in a small apartment and have a 15year old VW Golf.

This would make their friends just laugh as they didn't win the big lottery ticket.

Better to lie then losing face.

I told her as well, off you go, find one of those millionaires who is just waiting to splash his cash around with a Thai.

Her sister, 37 years of age married a 65 year German. For sure she is not happy but accepts now, that this is the only hope she has.

Yes classic bs from the girls to try to emulate

the providers with some competition, illustrated by few fake or rares examples

in the hope to boost the influx of money.

Doesn't even merit an aswer from your part

stop to ''i told her....'' you are just doing yourself ridiculous

and nothing change.

Time to act now, dump her

you should have much more satisfactions, pleasure 

and for less costs if you rent

if you don't want or can not to stay alone

take a cat or a dog

Edited August 13, 20205 yr by kingofthemountain

2 hours ago, AlfHuy said:

Indeed.

 

She is quite smart but extremely jealous and aggressive. 

I told her, she can be lucky that I have an education and that I was taught not to hit a child or woman. Other men just would knock her down with one hit. She just doesn't care. When she has her 5 minutes, she grabs whatever is close. She knows that farang don't touch Thai women and that Police would never believe a story from a farang man, re domestic abuse.

I also mentioned that she would think twice, doing that to a Thai man.

I gave her the last warning. Next act like this and I help her doing her luggage and escorting her to the lobby.

Do not belive all you read about police do not belive white men.Girlfriends do not get escorted to the lobby.They normally live on their own propperty.Sounds more like a holliday fling to me if you stay in hotel rooms.However.If you do live in the same adress and have the paperwork for it,you are equally treated by the police as a married couple.I would for sure dont take hitting from anyone.

20 minutes ago, kingofthemountain said:

 

if you don't want or can not to stay alone

take a cat or a dog

But don't forget to feed it... I think if you're older and have a much younger girlfriend here you have to be realistic. Don't expect things you can't expect from such a relationship. With this approach you can have a lot of fun. Otherwise you should blame yourself. 

It's not only Asian women that act like that.  You could have been describing my American girlfriend lol.

I once watched her throw my laptop out a 2nd story window after she was out drinking all night.

I laughed.

Because the look on her face and the next level of anger that was displayed was priceless...

when I informed that she grabbed the wrong laptop, that was hers she tossed.  HA!

2 hours ago, kingofthemountain said:

Hi

 

no, it's not just you, most have (Or had) the same issues

they act like this because they can, with a thai man usualy

they are quiet or it's end with a big slap on the face for her (Or worse)

 

i don't recomand to hit the girlfriend (Or any girl) but you need to be

very strong and showing at every moment who is the boss, and don;t

allow any lack of respect in any way from her.

 

In your case it's too late, the only option is to change the girlfriend

they never accept to change back, and the oral threats don't work

only the acts counts here, then dump her nowm anyway it should become

worse and worse with the time. then the sooner the better

 

Goodluck

 

ah,  the voice of experience .    the amazing thing is, some of us give this advice over and over.

and yet we keep hearing these stories...... over and over.       

seems like advice is no match for the spell some guys fall under

From time to time we get a story just like this,man and gf do not get along and what can i do about it.

Lots of advice and lots of not so good advice.

I do not believe for one second people do not see this coming,i would never put up with this and i never have.

My gf and i have been together for just about ten years now.

When she moved in i told her,'no screaming,no yelling no throwing things.I will never do that to you

and you will never do that to me.

Ten years and so far only 2 very minor arguments.When she talks to me she always start with khun and then my name,she also does this when she talks about me with friends or other people.

You show respect you get respect.

She has grown a lot as a person,she is not scared anymore to talk to strangers and even challenges

people who think they are in authority.

Her English is very good and she takes care of me very well, i think i take care of her also.

The thing is you need rules to live by,you set rules for kids so set rules for yourself.

I know a guy who got stabbed by his wife a long time ago,his response?''it was only a small pair of scissors'

Well it became a knife and things got a lot worse,still did not kick her out!!

The case is in court now.

 

 

Is it possible for you to leave?  Or are you incarcerated somehow.  If I or others treated you this way would you accept this abuse or condone it?  Do you feel you deserve it?

58 minutes ago, FarFlungFalang said:

I just treat it like a quite game of chess,study your opponent and try and make the best moves you can and try and outwit them without getting emotional or demanding,try and enjoy the battle,she's testing you.

And isn't it amazing how these girls with a 3rd grade education can beat the heck out of all these

educated males that portray themselves as successful and worldly persons ?

 

quite amusing to watch,  at times  

 

30 minutes ago, rumak said:

And isn't it amazing how these girls with a 3rd grade education can beat the heck out of all these

educated males that portray themselves as successful and worldly persons ?

 

quite amusing to watch,  at times  

 

Many of these girls with a 3rd grade education have degrees in survival from the university of life.

1 hour ago, mike787 said:

Is it possible for you to leave?  Or are you incarcerated somehow.  If I or others treated you this way would you accept this abuse or condone it?  Do you feel you deserve it?

He is in his own condo

it's the midget which is the guest and has to leave

9 minutes ago, kingofthemountain said:

He is in his own condo

it's the midget which is the guest and has to leave

midget 555

Don't tell her. If she sees you somewhere, she knocks you out, lol.