money stolen

[Harveyboy]

hello first of all id like to say im not sure if im in the correct forum please move according inf not i looked for legal but could not find..just want to ask if any professional or anyone with any knowledge of law might shed some light on this problem i know ill need to contact a lawyer later depending but for now perhaps you can Steer me in the right direction 

 

ok so this is about me not a friend i dont mind saying  ..i had a business in france closed it  2 years ago covid  i now live permanent in Thailand wife kids house ... when i left france my x wife was still allowed access to my business account so all the final closedown could be done   she also had access to my private account over 20 years ..anyway before i left france i gave my kids all the money i could i also put 10000 euros in an account  my death account i told my x and kids  it was to be able to get them here if the worst happened  3 days normally before burning so i decided they needed cash asap to book a flight same day no searching  just book and get here ..my x wife as i said knew all of this ..up till now all my bank statement have gone to my x house but recently

 

i contacted the bank to give my address here id been to in the past in case i was not allowed an account but all ok this week I received my statement posted june got here mid August.. i only have a token amount in my current account to keep it open but i found that the 10000 in my death account had gone ..

 

i contacted my x she denied all knowledge..and started spinning lie after lie  eventually after A dozen mails she broke and admitted stealing it her and her french boy friend ive told her she must repay or ill contact the bank fraud squad i have her confession here on my mail even then she argued and tried to take control saying she will give me half ...anyway eventually she backed down she is getting the cash from family in uk but for me that's not enough obviously if id have died no one would be the wiser she would probably told the kids id took ot out..so if id not found out id be 10 grand out of pocket and my x and boyfriend laughing ... that's the story so id like help what is my best course of action

 

..first im doing nothing till i have the Money ..back now revenge i want to ask for interest on the cash she stole..and a out of court settlement  i calculated if i contact the bank . fraud ..police court ect the costs legally will run into many thousands they wanted 20 000 just to do a simple divorce .got it done in UK 300 quid  so that's the type of money they charge..then id want to take her to court for compensation so i could see it running into 50 000 plus .

 

.am i better to go for an out of court settlement or let the powers that be handle it she and her boyfriend deserve jail no doubt about it its only my teenage children i worry about and how it will effect my relationship with them..so are any of these scenarios possible  advice would be appreciated  just to mention the divorce was amicable.no one involved i left everything house cars 30 years of belongings and walked away with a bag of clothes even gave her a job not that i needed anyone just to take care of my kids mother  Fool eh ..thanks  

[CharlieH]

Wall of text edited (paragraphs) to make for easier reading.

[StayinThailand2much]

True. Very hard to read.

 

If it is about the bank account; was your wife co-account holder, or did she have a withdrawal form with your signature, or a bank card and the PIN code, or the necessary codes for the online banking? If yes, then there is no way to get the money back.

 

Only chance would be, if she fraudulently faked your signature, or if it is a mishandled transaction by the bank, in which case the branch where the account is held, plus the local police station for a report would be where you need to go.

[CharlieH]

Be happy to have your loss restored. I understand the anger and feelings of revenge etc but let it go !

It may cost you more and will certainly be more hassle etc.

[ezzra]

I love French food wine and women but not when a french man try to express himself in english, ( no offence intended) having said  that, i think try to stay away from going to courts and get as much as you can of your money back, better one bird in the hand than 10 in the bush, at times it pays to be smart and not necessarily right...

[Bruno123]

Once you get your money back; secure it and forget about the whole thing. 

 

Don't attract unpleasant drama to your life. You moved to Thailand to have a more simple, laid back way of life, so why attract stress and unpleasantness? Be thankful if you get it back and then focus your energies on having a long and peaceful life.

Have I already told you to forget about it?

Forget about it. There, I am sure that I have told you. Money back; the end.

Edited August 19, 2021 by Bruno123

[phetphet]

Best wait until you actually have the cash in your hand. She might just be delaying payment.

Not sure it's theft under law if you gave her access details. Once you get the money, move on and forget about it.

 

If you really want to put the screws on, give her a reasonable date to complete payment, but tell her you will contact the police if not back by then. Might even be a good idea to call the local police station in France and ask advice.

 

Edited August 19, 2021 by phetphet

[BritManToo]

34 minutes ago, Harveyboy said:

m i better to go for an out of court settlement or let the powers that be handle it she and her boyfriend deserve jail no doubt about it its only my teenage children i worry about and how it will effect my relationship with them..so are any of these scenarios possible  advice would be appreciated

Your fault for giving a woman access to your money.

No sympathy, I'd suggest you move on and forget it.

[Stocky]

Life's far too short, just be happy you're getting your money back, learn the lesson and move on.

[worgeordie]

Your Ex wife and kids are going to need money, so took it,

you just seem to have run off to Thailand , so what do you

expect, the time courts are going to take,all the while lawyers

rack up the expense, you are in Thailand , court case in France,

Just let it go and earn your own money again.learn from your mistake

regards Worgeordie

[RJRS1301]

She had access to that account, her signature, your permissions and knowledge of her having access, unless you had a written contract about use of the funds, signed and witnessed, doubt you have any legal claim for recompense on the funds.

 

[KeeTua]

1 hour ago, Harveyboy said:

i also put 10000 euros in an account  my death account i told my x and kids  it was to be able to get them here if the worst happened

In other words you gave them permission to use that money. That she didn't use it for the purpose you intended is not illegal, there was no fraud involved. If she pays you back with out hassle that's your good luck.

[jwest10]

1 hour ago, CharlieH said:

Be happy to have your loss restored. I understand the anger and feelings of revenge etc but let it go !

It may cost you more and will certainly be more hassle etc.

Every situation different and I know of someone who loaned and it was stipulated as such to his brother-in-law and a substantial amount but when asked  so many times since 2008 the sister in law apparantly  gave his money to a cousin and she claimed very  persuasive wanted his money to cover college fees and when confronted stated it was given as a gift.
He got a few thousand Baht back but no where near the amount.
This happens alot here in the Far East and despite asking so many times it is obvious not going to get this money back
Nothing signed and one poster noticed it will cost far more to get it back and the ironic thing is her husband is a lawyer.
Very much doubt you will get your money and you lost your business too.
Disgusting indeed and yeah divorce very friendly, Yeah sorry you have to take it on the chin but hope you have a little left. 

[Johnny Mac]

in the grand scheme of things 10k Euro's is peanuts, let her keep it.

[jwest10]

48 minutes ago, worgeordie said:

Your Ex wife and kids are going to need money, so took it,

you just seem to have run off to Thailand , so what do you

expect, the time courts are going to take,all the while lawyers

rack up the expense, you are in Thailand , court case in France,

Just let it go and earn your own money again.learn from your mistake

regards Worgeordie

He might not have any money but assume he must have a little to stay here but yes very common here and within the extended family too.

 

[mahtin]

Wanted attention, got some. No charge.

 

The End.

[mvdf]

Back in 2014 I used to buy bahts of gold monthly in increments of 1 baht and 2 baht bars. I always believe in gold as one of the most stable and solid forms of financial safeguards for the future. GF somehow saw me enter the combination on the electronic safe. One day I was away in Europe and she accessed that safe and stole the entire bars I saved up so far (21 gold baht bars). Unreachable when I returned but cameras don't lie so I knew who it was. Heard from sources that she and her mother sold the gold and used it to renovate the house in Surin.

 

How this story relates to OP's is in this case I opted to neither pursue the matter further nor advance it to the authorities as doing so entails bouts of migraine and stress. On top of that, you will be quoted mind-boggling costs without any guarantee of asset recovery. 

 

Priceless however is the lesson learned from being too trusting and naive back then. 

  

Edited August 20, 2021 by mvdf

[thurien]

typically long story for a Friday morning: What do you want tell the audience?

[rwill]

I agree with the others.  If you get your money back be happy and forget it.  Life goes on.

[4MyEgo]

17 hours ago, Harveyboy said:

anyway before i left france i gave my kids all the money i could i also put 10000 euros in an account  my death account i told my x and kids  it was to be able to get them here if the worst happened  3 days normally before burning so i decided they needed cash asap to book a flight same day no searching  just book and get here ..my x wife as i said knew all of this ..up till now all my bank statement have gone to my x house but recently

Your to organised, and too trusting for you own good, especially with the X, an X is an X, regardless if you have kids and the least contact you have with her the better off you will be IMO.

 

Personally I wouldn't want my kid getting on a plane to come over here for my funeral, when I am gone, I am gone. My wife could do a short video and send it to her on LINE, too easy and any such money that I would have left behind for the kid could be used for the kid to do whatever the kid wants.

 

17 hours ago, Harveyboy said:

i have her confession here on my mail even then she argued and tried to take control saying she will give me half ...anyway eventually she backed down she is getting the cash from family in uk but for me that's not enough

Don't push too hard, if you get 2/3's of it back, consider your self very lucky because you didn't orgainse things properly, i.e. I am assuming she still had access to your account, whether it be via internet or ATM she would have had to have your PIN or password and if so the bank will wash it's hands of the matter, and if you want to go to court over 10,000 Euro's, it will end up costing you more than that, so see what she comes up with, without to much push or you might end up getting nothing but more grief.

 

17 hours ago, Harveyboy said:

just to mention the divorce was amicable.no one involved i left everything house cars 30 years of belongings and walked away with a bag of clothes even gave her a job not that i needed anyone just to take care of my kids mother 

If she is a responsible mother, it won't take much for her to look after the kids, as you say, you left her everything, you mention the divorce was very amicable, one would hope the actual divorce was sealed by the courts because if I'm not wrong, if it wasn't she can come after you for more years down the line. Sometimes people thing a divorce will cost a lot, but if amicable, a lawyer can draft up the docs, send them to her lawyer to sign and if his/her lawyer doesn't want to as was the case with my X, then a simple wavier from her lawyer is all it takes to get it over the line.

 

17 hours ago, Harveyboy said:

Fool eh ..thanks  

I wouldn't say that, too trusting, learn from your mistakes, and if you don't get any money back, drop the ball, you now have a new life, you don't need for her to keep dragging you back into the misery you were in. The kids will be fine, as for the boyfriend getting his hands on the property, well, we can't control everything, you gave it to her, so it's hers to do what she wants and if they p-i-s-s it up the wall, it's out of your control. Kids are resilient and will survive, just keep in touch with them as I do mine through LINE & Messenger, and the occasional tickets and accommodation paid for to visit us.

[Tracyb]

Cut and run.  Lesson learned.  Experience is the best teacher.

[steven100]

forget it,     expensive lesson.    move on.

[AlQaholic]

I don't understand, vindictive self-consuming enraged etc. etc. You already left your life over there, You left a bunch of money to whoever wants to take it. Just let it go. Life goes on.

[Johnny Mac]

Had to chuckle at the 'life goes on' comments. Not much of a life to go on with now days, is there..

[4737 Carlin]

Go all out for revenge. That should be your sole focus in life now.

[Nong Khai Man]

19 hours ago, Johnny Mac said:

in the grand scheme of things 10k Euro's is peanuts, let her keep it.

I Wish I Had a Bag of Peanuts then, Can you please send ME One .......

[Johnny Mac]

9 minutes ago, Nong Khai Man said:

I Wish I Had a Bag of Peanuts then, Can you please send ME One .......

I'm skint myself, but my point still stands..

[Andyfez]

In my experience, at time of death here in Thailand, most overseas relatives will make excuses, and not bother getting on a plane.

Once you're dead they let the unfortunate Thai wife see you off.

[Harveyboy]

23 hours ago, StayinThailand2much said:

True. Very hard to read.

 

If it is about the bank account; was your wife co-account holder, or did she have a withdrawal form with your signature, or a bank card and the PIN code, or the necessary codes for the online banking? If yes, then there is no way to get the money back.

 

Only chance would be, if she fraudulently faked your signature, or if it is a mishandled transaction by the bank, in which case the branch where the account is held, plus the local police station for a report would be where you need to go.

was not given permission used transfer from my to her account

 

2 hours ago, Nong Khai Man said:

I Wish I Had a Bag of Peanuts then, Can you please send ME One .......

it might be peanuts to you but its the only peanuts i have to eat.. 

[Harveyboy]

3 hours ago, 4737 Carlin said:

Go all out for revenge. That should be your sole focus in life now.

tks mate

 

5 hours ago, AlQaholic said:

I don't understand, vindictive self-consuming enraged etc. etc. You already left your life over there, You left a bunch of money to whoever wants to take it. Just let it go. Life goes on.

sorry didn't leave it to my x and her boyfriend...  my kids if you read