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Posted

How did you adjust to leaving Thailand. For me, it was the most difficult thing I've ever went through. Thailand was surreal and exciting and I found America bland after spending 4 years in Thailand.

I just turned 40 last month and have been back in the states for 5+ years and still haven't really adjusted. On the outside, I think my co-workers and friends think all is well. On the inside, I long to return to Thailand.

I have great Thai wife that lives with me in America and, after some tough times initially, landed a great job that pays more than I ever dreamed. What kept me going is knowing that someday I would return to Thailand permanently. My friends live in million dollar homes and drive $50,000 cars. I live in a small condo and drive a $5,000 car. 80% of my compensation goes into savings and financially ready to move back to Thailand in the near future.

I think many farangs have the same yearning to return the LOS and am curious how you made the transition.

Posted
How did you adjust to leaving Thailand. For me, it was the most difficult thing I've ever went through. Thailand was surreal and exciting and I found America bland after spending 4 years in Thailand.

I just turned 40 last month and have been back in the states for 5+ years and still haven't really adjusted. On the outside, I think my co-workers and friends think all is well. On the inside, I long to return to Thailand.

I have great Thai wife that lives with me in America and, after some tough times initially, landed a great job that pays more than I ever dreamed. What kept me going is knowing that someday I would return to Thailand permanently. My friends live in million dollar homes and drive $50,000 cars. I live in a small condo and drive a $5,000 car. 80% of my compensation goes into savings and financially ready to move back to Thailand in the near future.

I think many farangs have the same yearning to return the LOS and am curious how you made the transition.

after 13 years in thailand i could not imagine going back to live in the uk ,if i have to live on som tam and water i would :o

Posted
How did you adjust to leaving Thailand. For me, it was the most difficult thing I've ever went through. Thailand was surreal and exciting and I found America bland after spending 4 years in Thailand.

I just turned 40 last month and have been back in the states for 5+ years and still haven't really adjusted. On the outside, I think my co-workers and friends think all is well. On the inside, I long to return to Thailand.

I have great Thai wife that lives with me in America and, after some tough times initially, landed a great job that pays more than I ever dreamed. What kept me going is knowing that someday I would return to Thailand permanently. My friends live in million dollar homes and drive $50,000 cars. I live in a small condo and drive a $5,000 car. 80% of my compensation goes into savings and financially ready to move back to Thailand in the near future.

I think many farangs have the same yearning to return the LOS and am curious how you made the transition.

after 13 years in thailand i could not imagine going back to live in the uk ,if i have to live on som tam and water i would :o

I almost decided to stay 5 years ago with very little money in the bank. Would have enjoyed the last 5 years more if I stayed, but my 40s are going to be a good time.

Posted

I think most people return.

Many, like me, only left because they had no source of earnings there.

I earn here and go back every time I can afford to.

Despite the input from disappointed people, I always enjoy a stay there.

Maybe the disillusioned people expected more than LOS has to offer, I'm sure they have their story too.

It's still the best place to chill out for me.

Posted
I think most people return.

Many, like me, only left because they had no source of earnings there.

I earn here and go back every time I can afford to.

Despite the input from disappointed people, I always enjoy a stay there.

Maybe the disillusioned people expected more than LOS has to offer, I'm sure they have their story too.

It's still the best place to chill out for me.

My thoughts exactly. I have some great stories, but in the end it's the best place in the world to chill. How are your trips back home?

Posted

Great to hear the truth of things and it turned out well for you and family. Nothing wrong with making sound decisions

and also a great future in doing so. Problem is many wait until much later in life and to make good decisions for lack

of proper planning to start with.

Hope you do some smart investing to help you further your cause and future to live where ever you choose

being finacially secure after the drastic and dreadful changes in life. Adding to investments and savings as you are doing and making money on investments is like getting paid twice each month. The good thing is investments will not stop giving when work stops if done right.

Wish I would of made wiser decision sooner in life like you did. Lucky the last several years my work provides my

living expenses to include vehicle so I have been able to pass my retirement goal by double in just a few years and 90% goes to savings and give away about 10% helping others.

Just a fact that most fun, travel and adventure in retirement requires a well funded savings account that many will not sacrifice for. Now that money is no longer a issue I have no desire anymore for retiring in Thailand. I would rather live at home than be a 3rd rate resident in Thailand. Many places in the world to enjoy and I will keep/purchase a residence I can own and be fully mine regardless of changing laws back home.

Posted
Great to hear the truth of things and it turned out well for you and family. Nothing wrong with making sound decisions

and also a great future in doing so. Problem is many wait until much later in life and to make good decisions for lack

of proper planning to start with.

Hope you do some smart investing to help you further your cause and future to live where ever you choose

being finacially secure after the drastic and dreadful changes in life. Adding to investments and savings as you are doing and making money on investments is like getting paid twice each month. The good thing is investments will not stop giving when work stops if done right.

Wish I would of made wiser decision sooner in life like you did. Lucky the last several years my work provides my

living expenses to include vehicle so I have been able to pass my retirement goal by double in just a few years and 90% goes to savings and give away about 10% helping others.

Just a fact that most fun, travel and adventure in retirement requires a well funded savings account that many will not sacrifice for. Now that money is no longer a issue I have no desire anymore for retiring in Thailand. I would rather live at home than be a 3rd rate resident in Thailand. Many places in the world to enjoy and I will keep/purchase a residence I can own and be fully mine regardless of changing laws back home.

It seems we have both had a good run the last few years finacially. I invest solely in stocks and have done very well the last few years. I keep telling myself I'll have the resolve the handle the bad years also, but time will tell. As for for your desire to not live in Thailand, to each his own.

Posted
I think most people return.

Many, like me, only left because they had no source of earnings there.

I earn here and go back every time I can afford to.

Despite the input from disappointed people, I always enjoy a stay there.

Maybe the disillusioned people expected more than LOS has to offer, I'm sure they have their story too.

It's still the best place to chill out for me.

My thoughts exactly. I have some great stories, but in the end it's the best place in the world to chill. How are your trips back home?

I'm never too sad about leaving as long as I know it's not for the last time.

I have a good expat life in Germany and I've just about forgotten the UK.

I'd find it difficult now to break all ties with family and fiends here but as time goes by, I'm able to afford longer stays in LOS.

I have friends in LOS going back 20 years and more recently Phuket has become a handy halfway point for meeting up with my Oz relatives.

My only question really is - where else would I go and know for sure that I'm in for a good time?

Posted

I am fairly new expat and I never want to leave!

I don't mind visits to the USA or trips to other countries, but leaving Thailand for good would be tragic for me.

I can already see the longer you are an expat here (for many of us anyway) the harder it is to return, in every way.

I wonder what percentage of Pattaya condo divers are expats who have to go "home" for some reason ...

Posted

I have worked and lived in foreign countries most of 30 years so not what it use to be.

Many beautiful countries out there if money is not an issue and I plan on spending much time in them.

Looking for more moderate climate and not a predominately low income retirement resort/place.

For each their own and life goes on.

Posted
I have worked and lived in foreign countries most of 30 years so not what it use to be.

Many beautiful countries out there if money is not an issue and I plan on spending much time in them.

Looking for more moderate climate and not a predominately low income retirement resort/place.

For each their own and life goes on.

You've had an interesting life. Like yourself, I've been lucky enough to see much of the world. Never worked in another country, but have travelled 7-8 years around the glode.

If money wasn't an issue, I would probably still pick Thailand. I make enough money to live extravagantly in America, but big houses, 5 star hotels, and fine dining do nothing for me. All I need is more time to do the simple and inexpensive things that make me happy. Sitting on a barstool and interacting with all sorts(losers, winners, quacks...) is more entertaining than the upscale bars in America. It will be nice to wakeup every morning and not have a difficult time trying to fit in a bike ride or a trip to the health club.

Posted (edited)
How did you adjust to leaving Thailand. For me, it was the most difficult thing I've ever went through. Thailand was surreal and exciting and I found America bland after spending 4 years in Thailand.

I just turned 40 last month and have been back in the states for 5+ years and still haven't really adjusted. On the outside, I think my co-workers and friends think all is well. On the inside, I long to return to Thailand.

I have great Thai wife that lives with me in America and, after some tough times initially, landed a great job that pays more than I ever dreamed. What kept me going is knowing that someday I would return to Thailand permanently. My friends live in million dollar homes and drive $50,000 cars. I live in a small condo and drive a $5,000 car. 80% of my compensation goes into savings and financially ready to move back to Thailand in the near future.

I think many farangs have the same yearning to return the LOS and am curious how you made the transition.

I know exactly what you are talking about since I'm doing the same thing.

I have 3 years to go and I've been saving 70% of my take home pay for early retirement in Thailand. I'm not married so I can take 3 months off for vacations every year. :o

Thailand is fun as long as you have money and Thais don't want us without it. Over the years I have seen many men forced to go back home because of lack of money and bad health. At least in the USA, if you are old and poor, the government gives them food stamps, healthcare and welfare money. Not so in Thailand.

Edited by Gary74
Posted (edited)

Overseas 23 years, in Thailand about ten. Coming back to Canada was horrid, but I had to and I also thought I was tired of being an alien. Took me more than a year to quit comparing prices, services, everything. Dentists ten times costlier but my first one did way shoddy work. My optometrist only talked about laser surgery. And the rules! It's a no no no country. Sales tax is 13% and income tax is way high. Nobody locally would hire me so 99% of my work comes from the US of A (Canadian firms wanted three local references -- hey, read my CV!) As many con artists and criminals here as in Thailand. I'm getting assimilated, but it's been a really tough slog. Fortunately, new and old friends are wonderful and extremely helpful in all ways. And, food prices are about the same, buy other stuff on sale for cheap and get no-hassle retruns if something doesn't work. Ugggh, but I just hate to conform.

Oh, I forgot: the public libraries. Oooooh. They are worth the high taxes. Want a book that's not in your branch? No prob; just order it and they get it from another one. Free. Newspapers, mags, books, DVDs, music CDs...even if you're poor, you'll always have free entertainment. OK, I'll quit whining now.

Edited by Jet Gorgon
Posted
How did you adjust to leaving Thailand. For me, it was the most difficult thing I've ever went through. Thailand was surreal and exciting and I found America bland after spending 4 years in Thailand.

I just turned 40 last month and have been back in the states for 5+ years and still haven't really adjusted. On the outside, I think my co-workers and friends think all is well. On the inside, I long to return to Thailand.

I have great Thai wife that lives with me in America and, after some tough times initially, landed a great job that pays more than I ever dreamed. What kept me going is knowing that someday I would return to Thailand permanently. My friends live in million dollar homes and drive $50,000 cars. I live in a small condo and drive a $5,000 car. 80% of my compensation goes into savings and financially ready to move back to Thailand in the near future.

I think many farangs have the same yearning to return the LOS and am curious how you made the transition.

after 13 years in thailand i could not imagine going back to live in the uk ,if i have to live on som tam and water i would :o

Identical here mate.

Posted
Overseas 23 years, in Thailand about ten. Coming back to Canada was horrid, but I had to and I also thought I was tired of being an alien. Took me more than a year to quit comparing prices, services, everything. Dentists ten times costlier but my first one did way shoddy work. My optometrist only talked about laser surgery. And the rules! It's a no no no country. Sales tax is 13% and income tax is way high. Nobody locally would hire me so 99% of my work comes from the US of A (Canadian firms wanted three local references -- hey, read my CV!) As many con artists and criminals here as in Thailand. I'm getting assimilated, but it's been a really tough slog. Fortunately, new and old friends are wonderful and extremely helpful in all ways. And, food prices are about the same, buy other stuff on sale for cheap and get no-hassle retruns if something doesn't work. Ugggh, but I just hate to conform.

Jet, must be quite an adjustment. I always feel quite disconnected when I return for brief trips back home. Like you, a looong time expat, though from south of you. Do you think you'll ever be back?

Posted

Ya, ChinT. I think it's mostly because my values have changed so much. I am truly a simple-living person now. I don't need expensive things, or new this or that. All my antiques, furniture, Persian carpets, etc are still in storage. 12 years! I have a small ground-floor flat, lovely landlords and neighbours and they all think I am crazy sleeping on a futon, no TV, no dust-collecting ornaments, etc. I haven't applied for healthcare because I haven't paid any taxes yet, so I feel I would be cheating the system. I guess in the back of my head I am putting these things off because I don't know where my home port is. I want to live on an island...

Posted

going back home to work is never a liked item, going when you have plenty of cash and do not need to

live cheap or in a large city can be quite pleasurable I hope. I am waiting on a guy who moved to florida and will default on 10 acreas of land on Manistee River. Not much work in the area to speak of so a couple grand an acrea

should do it. My hide away that I can boat and relax and use as a summer home base while traveling the rest of year.

Traverse city not far which is a very enjoyable summer time area. Do some RVing and just relax without being in the rat race of things but also not in poverty and traffic.

Still plenty of other areas I would like to look and maybe back to Colorado, Montana or Wyoming, don't know where

for sure. Definetly nothing that gets over 85 for more than a month or two out of the year during the summer.

Life is great

Posted (edited)

"I'm never too sad about leaving as long as I know it's not for the last time."

i love the way it was said. that was exactly what made me endure leaving thailand, the thoughts that i will be back.

Edited by JensHauswirth
Posted

The culture shock for me was the worst!Quitting Thailand was much the same as quitting smoking,bloody hard!

I've lived overseas for over ten years but did plenty of globetrotting before then.I fell in love with Thailand and all it's idiosyncracies and every time I go back I have a sense of homecoming as if I never left.I could never adjust to living in Oz,spent three months there after Bangkok and was climbing the walls.The prices,the racism,the narrow minded people,the condescending attitude to anything Asian,the government,the GST,the no this and no that,living in Thailand definitely spoilt me.Hong Kong is a happy medium where I can come back on a regular basis to get my "fix".

Posted

I lived in Thailand from 1960>67, came back to the States at 13 years of age, and never completely adjusted. I have an excuse though, I have Third Culture Syndrome. As a Third Cuture Child I was born into one culture, grew up in another, and did not fit in either one. When we came back it was with the expectation of going back 'home' within the next few months. That didn't happen. What did happen was that I never really grew out of that 13 year old kid (when it came to Thailand) and when I did go back in '93 I made a complete fool of myself on several occations. I did give me that chance to 'grow up' though. It was a couple of years after that I started receiving questionnaires from former ISB students asking about my adjustment & life problems for their MFA/PhD work. I have since found examples of this going back years, with military, diplomatic, and especially missionary children (where they lived in one country, long term, rather than bouncing around). In fact in the past it has been a not-so-rare occurance for MK's(missionary kids) to stay in the country where their parents served. I have a few more years left with the company & schooling and I want to come back to live & teach. I want my girls & grandchildren to be able to come over & experience with me, maybe in some little way, the beauty and wonder that is Thailand. Ieyuhrah

Posted
I have worked and lived in foreign countries most of 30 years so not what it use to be.

Many beautiful countries out there if money is not an issue and I plan on spending much time in them.

Looking for more moderate climate and not a predominately low income retirement resort/place.

For each their own and life goes on.

You've had an interesting life. Like yourself, I've been lucky enough to see much of the world. Never worked in another country, but have travelled 7-8 years around the glode.

If money wasn't an issue, I would probably still pick Thailand. I make enough money to live extravagantly in America, but big houses, 5 star hotels, and fine dining do nothing for me. All I need is more time to do the simple and inexpensive things that make me happy. Sitting on a barstool and interacting with all sorts(losers, winners, quacks...) is more entertaining than the upscale bars in America. It will be nice to wakeup every morning and not have a difficult time trying to fit in a bike ride or a trip to the health club.

I've also worked in a number of countries & miss being in LoS. For all the places I've stayed, I always found it hard to be happy in the overpiced hotels - never needed to be in the 4 & 5 star places. Back in Sydney I guess the one thing I really don't like seeing is BA10 leaving. If I can see it, I'm not on it.

Posted

My agreement with the wife is that we will return to Thailand permanently when my beard goes completely grey. A couple more years! :D

We save most of her salary and I bank 10 -15 % and we'll rent out the paid for house in the U.S. to cover expenses in a medium size town in the NW. I don't get back to LOS as near as much as I'd like these days because mama says I transform into some sort of lecherous beast when I'm let loose anywhere near BG's :D ... She figures I'll mellow with old age. :o

But for the past 20 years... I've never dreamed of living anywhere else. I've lived all around the Pacific Rim and I keep coming back to LOS.

I can't imagine having to leave without the prospect of coming back.

Posted

look at my recent posts...I'm in Philadephia after 20 years as a permanent expat...I'm terrified of this place...

I just got off the phone with my thai wife and also talked to my step-daughter and nieces...the kids don't speak english but they understand 'I Love you'...I wanted to fall on the stupid carpeted 15th floor office floor here in Phila in supplication that I would see them again one day...

when I left the US I burned all bridges; never expected to see the place again...but, America is ubiquitous...it's not a place that you can avoid...

(shit...the keyboard is wet with tears again...)

Posted
:o Big hug coming over the border to you, Tutsi. You are going home soon, tho right? Fill up some time getting all those cooking ingredients you need. And new recipes, please. Sure miss you in Food forum. :D
Posted

Reverse Culture Shock can be an awful thing to adjust to.“What is Reverse culture shock?”, I hear you ask. Well, put simply, reverse culture shock is the experience of leaving LOS after an extended period and discovering exactly how hard it can be to reintegrate into your own culture.Some signs you are experiencing this:

1) You realize that the man who roots through your garbage at night is more likely to be an alimony detective sent by your ex-husband, than a man looking for empty plastic soda bottles.

2) You get shirty when the man in the recycling truck doesn’t want to pay for your used toilet paper.

3) A local chemical factory catches fire and belches thick black smoke over your home, your neighbors either evacuate or choke to death and die in writhing agony. Strangely enough the only impact that the fire has on you is to makes you homesick for Bangkok. If you have never lived in Bangkok, it makes you long for Thai cigarettes.

4)You turn on the television to watch the news and are surprised to find that two different channels have two different opinions about the same event.

5)You find yourself hoarding things like butter and cheese ‘in case you never see them again’.

6)You are surprised to find that it costs more to bribe a tax collector that it does to pay your tax, you are also surprised to find that trying to bribe a tax collector is not only an arresteble offence, but that trying to bribe the arresting officer is only likely to make things worse.

7)You start calling Okinawans ‘Overseas Japanese’, Hawaiians ‘Overseas Americans’ and Australians ‘Separatists’.

8)You have to remember that the man walking around the subway with a mirror on a stick is more likely to use it to look up your skirt than he is to use it to check the waste baskets for empty plastic soda bottles.

9)You are staying in a hotel receive a telephone call in the middle of the night but, instead of asking who it is, you instinctively say ‘Me no want want massage’.

10)You walk into Central station at the height of rush hour, during the rainy season, and think to yourself, “Man, this place is BARREN”, then when you board said train you think “Everybody is so POLITE”.

Posted

I have lived away from my home country for the majorty of my life and it is only here in Thailand that I feel settled. Perhaps this has more to do with the fact that I am now 37 and it is time to settle. If I had to leave Thailand then I am sure that it would be difficult at first but I suppoose I'd make the best of it. I have no intentions of leaving at the moment but you never know what life has in store.

Posted
How did you adjust to leaving Thailand.

after 13 years in thailand i could not imagine going back to live in the uk ,if i have to live on som tam and water i would :o

That would be OK, but what happens when the plethora of immigration stuff comes into play. 90 visits, increased cost of visas, money in the bank etc

Posted

This is an interesting topic, because most everyone that has responded had come here initially to experience Thailand - the good. I first came for a week of R&R from Vietnam in 1971 and thought how great it would be to live here - a place with beautiful women, good food, cheap prices and no one shooting at you! :D I did just that and in 1974 I sold everything and moved to Bangkok. There weren't many business opportunities for a 22 yr. old back then, since there was little demand for learning English. The possibilities left were all illegal and I didn'tn want to end up in a Thai prison, so after 10 months I returned and started a life in the USA once again.

The American dream ensued: college, career, marriage, children, divorce and retirement. Although heartbroken, divorce gave me the opportunity to pursue my Thai dream. My home was paid for by then and so I just locked it up and moved back to Thailand in 2003. I didn't need to work since I had a pension, but chose to teach as a way of meeting "proper women". Once again the idea didn't work out since even in an academic enviorment - Thais preferred to distance themselves from foreigners. hel_l, even teachers that I co-taught with or had desks in the same office would never think to sit with any foreign teachers at lunch time. This was reflected in the three different high schools I taught in throughout Thailand. "Renting" beautiful women is nice, but less than satisfying for the mind. It's like being lonely in a room full of people. Lucky for me, after 4 years, "the right woman" came along and we married. At the time I met her I had 5 women that were pursuing my affections, so I wasn't desperate.

My wife wants to give life in the USA a try and maybe better employment opportunities. I have no objections, since my home is in a very rural and beautiful place and I long for the outdoors once more. I'm ready to move back as well, since the things I really thought I would find in Thailand are non-existent (other than my lovely and caring wife). Thai women make fine wives, but you have to be very careful in your selection, since beauty alone will bring you much grief and expense.

My big let downs about living in Thailand are: 1) 90% of the Thais think all foreigners are rich and stupid and they expect you to always give to them and aren't shy about asking for things. 2) Unless you are very wealthy and can afford lots of security, it's dangerous to live or even camp away from the population (poor people can and do live everywhere in this country). 3) For a population that is mostly Buddhist and make a big show of devotion, few people actually practice the terms they use such as: jai yen (cool heart) meaning patience - driving and waiting in line, Thais always try to get around you(especially foreigners), nam jai (juice of your heart) meaning generosity - ever try to walk across the street and have a car stop for you or get a fair price when buying something? 4) Equality - no matter how well you speak the language or respect the culture you are never treated as equal to a Thai. You find this out when you stand at a counter and they help Thais first or you get involved in a traffic accident or fight with a Thai - you will be quilty and have to pay all of the fines and expenses. 5) Pollution - it's everywhere! I've been to many beautiful beaches, caves and waterfalls which have so much litter it makes you sick to think they would have so little care for the natural beauty they have. Even in a classroom there is trash everywhere and the trash bin is in the back of the room! 6) Cheating - it's openly accepted and understood. Thai teachers actually sit outside the classroom during an exam to avoid catching students with "cheat sheets". They've learned it only makes their job tougher since if the student fails they will have to test them again. 7) Lying - necessary for 'saving face'.

Oh sure, there are some fine aspects about living in Thailand. People are basically friendly, especially if you speak the language. The 'sanook factor' (food, lodging, booze and women) is cheaper than many countries. So if you live in a big city and can afford to pay for their services, Thais will make you feel very happy in their country and isolate you from the grim realities of a Third World country.

Fortunately for my wife and I, my home back in the States is in a 'vacation land' too and many people love to visit there. Situated amongst National Forest and Wilderness Areas it has a county population of only 6000 full time residents. During the 30 yrs. I've had a home there the population in my town alone has only grown by 20 people. My town has never even had a stop light! For me the benefits of returning there are greater than trying to live my 'Thai dream' any longer. I'm renting a small place to store our household belongings, pickup truck and motorcycle and plan to return each year during the winter months.

Best of luck to the rest of you. :o

Posted
Ya, ChinT. I think it's mostly because my values have changed so much. I am truly a simple-living person now. I don't need expensive things, or new this or that. All my antiques, furniture, Persian carpets, etc are still in storage. 12 years! I have a small ground-floor flat, lovely landlords and neighbours and they all think I am crazy sleeping on a futon, no TV, no dust-collecting ornaments, etc. I haven't applied for healthcare because I haven't paid any taxes yet, so I feel I would be cheating the system. I guess in the back of my head I am putting these things off because I don't know where my home port is. I want to live on an island...

After leaving Thailand, my saving habits changed. The fact that I didn't enjoy the expensive pleasures that America offers, made it that much easier. After a rough start (cleaning pools for one of my biking buddies), I got a job as a loan officer. Within 3 months of 50+ hour weeks, I was managing the office. A year later I was an executive at a publicly traded company and working 60+ hour weeks. Luck was a major contributer to my current situation, but my desire to return to Thailand is what keeps me going.

Now, I miss Thailand nearly as much as the day I left. I've cut back the hours I'm at the office and spend more money on toys, but the desire to return hasn't lessened. As silly as it is to leave my current job, I will in the next year. I'll cancel my lease, sell the car, and try to stretch 16 mil baht in savings to the end. I won't be living the high life in Thailand financially, but I plan on enjoying almost every day. I also anticipate making a little money other than investment income while in Thailand.

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