rutteketuut Posted June 17, 2023 Share Posted June 17, 2023 I'm married to Thai lady for 15 years and thinking of leaving her because she drinks Lao Khao and is always drunk. We bought land and house in 2006 ( I have 30 year lease on it) and married for Thai law in 2007. Is it no big deal if I leave her without getting divorsed first? I don't realy care about the property. The property is in her name. Thanks. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post petermik Posted June 17, 2023 Popular Post Share Posted June 17, 2023 Walk away and don`t look back....good luck ???? 8 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yellowtail Posted June 17, 2023 Share Posted June 17, 2023 You should at least try to get her into AA. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post NativeBob Posted June 17, 2023 Popular Post Share Posted June 17, 2023 So she is basically at her late 40s, right? And alcoholic. No way she would change. Leave her and start over. She's not worthy. 4 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rutteketuut Posted June 17, 2023 Author Share Posted June 17, 2023 1 minute ago, Yellowtail said: You should at least try to get her into AA. I cannot force her. She says she can stop drinking by herself but it's only getting worse. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post rutteketuut Posted June 17, 2023 Author Popular Post Share Posted June 17, 2023 4 minutes ago, NativeBob said: So she is basically at her late 40s, right? And alcoholic. No way she would change. Leave her and start over. She's not worthy. She's 52 and I will be 60 in 2 months, Time to start enjoying life again without all that misery. 9 7 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NativeBob Posted June 17, 2023 Share Posted June 17, 2023 2 minutes ago, rutteketuut said: I cannot force her. She says she can stop drinking by herself but it's only getting worse. Irrelevant what she says. I've seen so many alco stories, ruined families so NO she won't quit. Live your own life and forget about her. The fun (with her booze endeavors) is still ahead and you don't want to witness it. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BobBKK Posted June 17, 2023 Share Posted June 17, 2023 Tell her what it is going to lead to - her choice? I'd give her 3 months something like that and use that time to move your assets. No kids? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post petermik Posted June 17, 2023 Popular Post Share Posted June 17, 2023 Just now, rutteketuut said: She's 52 and I will be 60 in 2 months, Time to start enjoying life again without all that misery. We are here only once.... get away and enjoy life again ???? 2 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post OneMoreFarang Posted June 17, 2023 Popular Post Share Posted June 17, 2023 8 minutes ago, rutteketuut said: Is it no big deal if I leave her without getting divorsed first? Why don't you get divorced? That should guarantee that you don't end up with any problems, including debts, in the future. 6 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ezzra Posted June 17, 2023 Share Posted June 17, 2023 I'd walk away and tell her that if she ever mend her ways to give you you a call. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post BobBKK Posted June 17, 2023 Popular Post Share Posted June 17, 2023 1 minute ago, ezzra said: I'd walk away and tell her that if she ever mend her ways to give you you a call. Whoa! no, no - it's over if it's over. Don't even think of going back imho. 3 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post chickenslegs Posted June 17, 2023 Popular Post Share Posted June 17, 2023 8 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said: Why don't you get divorced? That should guarantee that you don't end up with any problems, including debts, in the future. That's a very good point. All the debts that are incurred during the marriage will be the responsibility of both the divorcing spouses in Thailand. https://www.thaiembassy.com/family/divorce-in-thailand 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mavideol Posted June 17, 2023 Share Posted June 17, 2023 (edited) Run Forrest, Run....don't look back, I did the same with US wife, married 18 years (stay that long for the kids) she was an alcoholic, AA didn't help as she denied it (being addicted), have been happier ever since running away Edited June 17, 2023 by Mavideol 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post VinnieK Posted June 17, 2023 Popular Post Share Posted June 17, 2023 ...and don't marry again. Too many downsides and very few upsides. 4 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denim Posted June 17, 2023 Share Posted June 17, 2023 30 minutes ago, Yellowtail said: You should at least try to get her into AA. I knew someone who managed to quit drinking by taking up cannabis instead. Being stoned reduced his desire to drink significantly until finally he was ok with just the weed. Of course , this resulted in a new kind of dependence but it was not nearly as bad as being alcoholic and at least when stoned he was still coherent and could function. A lot depends on the individual. If they are intelligent enough to recognize there is a serious problem and something needs to be done it might work. But if they are in denial , not much hope. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FritsSikkink Posted June 17, 2023 Share Posted June 17, 2023 Best to divorce like others said. You don't want to end up with problems caused by her after leaving. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Don Chance Posted June 17, 2023 Share Posted June 17, 2023 Baclofen suppresses the desire for alcohol and has cured many people. Check the Drink too much Sub. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rutteketuut Posted June 18, 2023 Author Share Posted June 18, 2023 21 hours ago, BobBKK said: Tell her what it is going to lead to - her choice? I'd give her 3 months something like that and use that time to move your assets. No kids? No kids. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rutteketuut Posted June 18, 2023 Author Share Posted June 18, 2023 21 hours ago, OneMoreFarang said: Why don't you get divorced? That should guarantee that you don't end up with any problems, including debts, in the future. She doesn't want to. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KhunLA Posted June 18, 2023 Share Posted June 18, 2023 22 hours ago, Yellowtail said: You should at least try to get her into AA. I would think during those 15ish yrs, the topic of not being an alky has been discussed. Failed, and now ready to bail. Wise choice, as why be miserable because of your partner. Not getting any younger ... enjoy life instead of waiting for someone else to change. For better or worst is fine ... if not self induced. You're on your own, if throwing you own life away. Not being an accident or health issue, leave her. And I don't agree with the sentiment, alcoholism is a disease. It's self inflicted, that's not a disease. Threw the 1st TH wife out for about the same, drank & gambled too much. Not nearly as patient as the op, less than 1 yrs and divorced. Too much living to do, to waste on other people. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OneMoreFarang Posted June 18, 2023 Share Posted June 18, 2023 29 minutes ago, rutteketuut said: She doesn't want to. And because she doesn't want to that's it? Do you want to do for the rest of your life what she wants? Do you need to face serious trouble before you make your own decisions? Grow a pair. Do it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bignok Posted June 18, 2023 Share Posted June 18, 2023 23 hours ago, rutteketuut said: She's 52 and I will be 60 in 2 months, Time to start enjoying life again without all that misery. Then you already know the answer. Don't need to ask others. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post spidermike007 Posted June 18, 2023 Popular Post Share Posted June 18, 2023 If you have spoken to her about her problem, and she has no interest in addressing it, or showing any self discipline, leave her as fast as you can. Within the next few days. The clock is ticking, life is flying by at a breakneck pace, and you are wasting away, with someone who is not even remotely worthy of your time and effort. Leave now. And be grateful you got out. It is never too late to start over. They say you can judge a man by the company he keeps. I look around this table, and now I can see why my reputation is in tatters. This is what you see when you are young. Everything seems very close. That is the future. And that is what you see when you are old. Everything seems really far away. That's the past. The future isn't just something that happens. It's a brutal force with a great sense of humor that will steamroll you, if you're not watching. We don’t stop playing because we grow old. We grow old because we stop playing. 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
n00dle Posted June 18, 2023 Share Posted June 18, 2023 Divorce her and walk away. Be sure to cut all ties, she will start borrowing money or gambling next if she hasnt already. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liverpool Lou Posted June 18, 2023 Share Posted June 18, 2023 On 6/17/2023 at 11:35 AM, Yellowtail said: You should at least try to get her into AA. Or the RAC. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liverpool Lou Posted June 18, 2023 Share Posted June 18, 2023 (edited) On 6/17/2023 at 11:52 AM, OneMoreFarang said: Why don't you get divorced? That should guarantee that you don't end up with any problems, including debts, in the future. I agree about the divorce part but personal debts incurred solely by her would not become his liability if they were not in any way for joint or family purposes. Edited June 18, 2023 by Liverpool Lou Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skallywag Posted June 18, 2023 Share Posted June 18, 2023 On 6/17/2023 at 11:52 AM, OneMoreFarang said: That should guarantee that you don't end up with any problems, including debts, in the future. If you have any credit cards together or items bought with payments still outstanding then you are responsible for those debts. Otherwise as far as I know, you can walk away and are not responsible for your wifes debts while still married in Thailand 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OneMoreFarang Posted June 18, 2023 Share Posted June 18, 2023 1 hour ago, Liverpool Lou said: I agree about the divorce part but personal debts incurred solely by her would not become his liability if they were not in any way for joint or family purposes. Are you sure you would want to argue about that in Thai court? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OneMoreFarang Posted June 18, 2023 Share Posted June 18, 2023 1 hour ago, Skallywag said: If you have any credit cards together or items bought with payments still outstanding then you are responsible for those debts. Otherwise as far as I know, you can walk away and are not responsible for your wifes debts while still married in Thailand That reminds me of when the elder sister of my gf died. It seems she had borrowed some money from a local loan shark. It was recommended to me to better pay... Would it be enforceable in a court of law? I guess not. But ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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