Are Some Thai Girls Very Sheltered?

[rainman]

I know this 10 year old boy ..his parents are good friends of mine, his dad is farang and his mother thai. The boy looks 100% thai, you wouldn't be able to tell him apart from other thai kids, but he barely speaks thai. Recently i went to the supermarket with him to get a few things ...you should have seen some of the people's reactions when they spoke thai with him and he couldn't understand a word, then responded to them in swiss (his "native" language, even though he was born in Thailand but only lived here for the first few weeks in his life). Poor boy, i guess most people think he's messing with them.

[mbkudu]

I thought the Swiss spoke German, French or Italian. Swiss?

[Stocky]

I thought the Swiss spoke German, French or Italian. Swiss?

... i guess most people think he's messing with them

You're messing with us too Rainman. Nice story though, so who gives a shit

[rainman]

We learn german in school but we speak a very different language at home. It is similar to german, but far from it. No german will understand swiss, ask anyone. And there is of course french, italian and roman (a very old language, only spoken by a few thousand people these days).

Here's a little something i found about the swiss language:

The German speaking Swiss speak Swiss German, which differs from Standard German (i.e. German as in Germany).

In the Swiss French speaking part, they learn Standard German at school as a first (and basically only) foreign language. There is no way that is going to make them able to understand Swiss German. Even people having Standard German as a mother tongue have severe difficulties. According to some German friends of mine, living in Norway, the correspondance between Standard German and Swiss German is as the correspondance between Standard German and Danish.

Source: http://www.pvv.ntnu.no/~heidit/felt.html

Trust me on this, i am swiss. But back to the topic

[Stocky]

My apologies Rainman So the kid was speaking dodgy Swiss-German

[mbkudu]

We learn german in school but we speak a very different language at home. It is similar to german, but far from it. No german will understand swiss, ask anyone. And there is of course french, italian and roman (a very old language, only spoken by a few thousand people these days).

Here's a little something i found about the swiss language:

The German speaking Swiss speak Swiss German, which differs from Standard German (i.e. German as in Germany).

In the Swiss French speaking part, they learn Standard German at school as a first (and basically only) foreign language. There is no way that is going to make them able to understand Swiss German. Even people having Standard German as a mother tongue have severe difficulties. According to some German friends of mine, living in Norway, the correspondance between Standard German and Swiss German is as the correspondance between Standard German and Danish.

Source: http://www.pvv.ntnu.no/~heidit/felt.html

Trust me on this, i am swiss. But back to the topic

Well, I'll be dipped in s###! I learn something new everyday.

[Johnny Moron]

Many, do want to have a relationship and experience intimacy but due to working restraints and a huge male gay population, the odds are pretty much against them; therefore a contributing factor to more interracial relationships with foreigners. 

Rubbish.

If "working restraints" experienced by Thai women prevent relationships with Thai men, why would they choose instead to pursure "interracial relationships with foreigners"?

Are you suggesting that relationships with foreigners are somehow less time consuming?

Personally, I would suggest that you go away and have a serious re-think. Thai women do not form relationships with foreigners because of "work restraints" (or even "constraints"), neither do they do so because of what you refer to as a "huge male gay population".

Think about it. Then come back and try again.

[Crocs]

Yeah I was a bit flummoxed by that quote from Shopgurl too? What kind of constraints???

[rainman]

Maybe shopgurl has a point there that we, as farang men, are not able to see. Maybe some more explanation would be helpful?

[stroll]

At least she is not posting in Swiss-German or Roman, so the text is there for everybody to read and misunderstand.

Her post in its entirety is a lot more intelligent than the other garbage that gets posted about 'Thai girls'.

[ASIC]

One girl in my office is the only bread-winner in her family. Not only does she take care of herself and her sister, but she also sends money back to her parents monthly. On the other hand, her two brothers are hanging around at home not lifting a finger. This is not the first time I have seen this situation, and it seem quite wide-spread. Anyone care to comment, because I can't see anything "sheltered" about this?

ASIC

[mbkudu]

I have to agree with ASIC about what he says. The sheltered ones I have talked to as I explained above were upper class 'Chula' and 'Thammasat' girls who live with mum and dad, never paid rent in their lives and think that a part time job is beneath them socially.

Working class girls who work in offices, banks and factories have a better grip on reality because they are the 'bread winners' in the family as ASIC said. Working hard for little is a b#tch and when it goes to help family members who are not pulling their own weight, then a certain hardness sets in. I guess this could bring us back to why Thai women are marrying foreign men more often without shame.

[shopgurl]

Rubbish.

If "working restraints" experienced by Thai women prevent relationships with Thai men, why would they choose instead to pursure "interracial relationships with foreigners"?

Are you suggesting that relationships with foreigners are somehow less time consuming?

Personally, I would suggest that you go away and have a serious re-think. Thai women do not form relationships with foreigners because of "work restraints" (or even "constraints"), neither do they do so because of what you refer to as a "huge male gay population".

Think about it. Then come back and try again.

Excuse me but were you reading anything I wrote or did you just want to get noticed? First of all I didn't "suggest" anything, second-I am a Thai woman and was merely sharing my own experiences that I clearly stated had no reference to any judgements or assumptions. And lastly, it seems you have misunderstood it the wrong way so why don't you take the time, go away, think, and keep on thinking before posting irreverent comments and also think how you can contribute to the threads than trying to find faults in them.

Maybe my choice of syntax was above your level of understanding, so let me go through it again for your benefit:

"Many, do want to have a relationship and experience intimacy but due to working restraints and a huge male gay population, the odds are pretty much against them; therefore a contributing factor to more interracial relationships with foreigners."

working restraints - many work from the hours 8.00 - 17.00 but continue working on to the late hours and anytime left is used for the commute home or either some time spent with family or friends. Thai women do have they own lives and are NOT all trying to catch a foreigner, plently are very capable, competent, and happy on their own two very pretty feet!

huge male gay population - it might be your ignorance that tries not to notice this but it is apparent and anyone will tell you the same.

contributing factor - NOT that they choose to pursue because of pure convenience unlike your post implied, where are you getting this from?

Stroll & Rainman-thanks for your help but honestly it's people like this that makes me too tired and fed up to continue to post anymore.

It's like the moment that anyone confronts them with the slightest bit of truth, it's incomprehensible.

[Johnny Moron]

it seems you have misunderstood it the wrong way so why don't you take the time, go away, think, and keep on thinking before posting irreverent comments

Your opinion still no makes no sense.

Yes, many Thai women lead busy professional lives (just as millions of other women do in countries throughout the world), but I fail completely to see how this can be considered a "contributing factor to more interracial relationships with foreigners".

Sorry if this pisses you off - but you are wrong: that's just the way it is.

[mbkudu]

Many, do want to have a relationship and experience intimacy but due to working restraints and a huge male gay population, the odds are pretty much against them; therefore a contributing factor to more interracial relationships with foreigners. 

Rubbish.

If "working restraints" experienced by Thai women prevent relationships with Thai men, why would they choose instead to pursure "interracial relationships with foreigners"?

Are you suggesting that relationships with foreigners are somehow less time consuming?

Personally, I would suggest that you go away and have a serious re-think. Thai women do not form relationships with foreigners because of "work restraints" (or even "constraints"), neither do they do so because of what you refer to as a "huge male gay population".

Think about it. Then come back and try again.

Sorry Shopgurl, but I think I'm siding with Moron; I think he is right. If a Thai woman has a busy life and is socially sheltered, how would persuing a relationship with a Farang be any different than that of a Thai man. The method may be different, but the desired result is expected to be the same, a boyfriend. If a busy career woman is lonely, she will make time to find someone if she so chooses.

[stroll]

"If "working restraints" experienced by Thai women prevent relationships with Thai men, why would they choose instead to pursure "interracial relationships with foreigners"?"

Shopgurl was talking about the 30++ agegroup here, being busy working has contributed to them not having a partner. Not many Thai men of similar age would be single, straight and interested in a Thai woman of this age, Farangs are less prejudiced as far as age is concerned. This is how I understand the text, and it makes sense read this way, true or not, up to you.

Btw, nobody mentioned that there are many Thai lesbians about, true or am I imagining it?

[john b good]

Rubbish.

If "working restraints" experienced by Thai women prevent relationships with Thai men, why would they choose instead to pursure "interracial relationships with foreigners"?

Are you suggesting that relationships with foreigners are somehow less time consuming?

Personally, I would suggest that you go away and have a serious re-think. Thai women do not form relationships with foreigners because of "work restraints" (or even "constraints"), neither do they do so because of what you refer to as a "huge male gay population".

Think about it. Then come back and try again.

Excuse me but were you reading anything I wrote or did you just want to get noticed? First of all I didn't "suggest" anything, second-I am a Thai woman and was merely sharing my own experiences that I clearly stated had no reference to any judgements or assumptions. And lastly, it seems you have misunderstood it the wrong way so why don't you take the time, go away, think, and keep on thinking before posting irreverent comments and also think how you can contribute to the threads than trying to find faults in them.

Maybe my choice of syntax was above your level of understanding, so let me go through it again for your benefit:

"Many, do want to have a relationship and experience intimacy but due to working restraints and a huge male gay population, the odds are pretty much against them; therefore a contributing factor to more interracial relationships with foreigners."

working restraints - many work from the hours 8.00 - 17.00 but continue working on to the late hours and anytime left is used for the commute home or either some time spent with family or friends. Thai women do have they own lives and are NOT all trying to catch a foreigner, plently are very capable, competent, and happy on their own two very pretty feet!

huge male gay population - it might be your ignorance that tries not to notice this but it is apparent and anyone will tell you the same.

contributing factor - NOT that they choose to pursue because of pure convenience unlike your post implied, where are you getting this from?

Stroll & Rainman-thanks for your help but honestly it's people like this that makes me too tired and fed up to continue to post anymore.

It's like the moment that anyone confronts them with the slightest bit of truth, it's incomprehensible.

Let me say that I think that moron and mbkudu have made a couple of valid points.

That said and acknowledging the opinion of many that I am a critic of many things Thai (even bordering on the negative, even if most of what I say is true)

I welcome the contributions that you make.

Your posts are (IMO) well considered and generally inteligent views from a Thai persons perspective. And I think that, is great.

It is in my view a pity that a great deal more Thais don't visit and contribute to the forum.

I personally try to be provocative in what I post (and hopefully most of it is true, and is at least as I see it) and if a few more Thais were to read what the world at large (OK the forum contributors) think about Thais and Thailand that they might just think "yes, this guy/girl might just have a point")

I hope that you don't take your pen (your keyboard) and walk away and not continue to contribute to the forum in the future.

If more Thai folk were to do so (visit and contribute) the forum would be a beneficiary but the country as a whole might be also.

[autonomous_unit]

Every year, hundreds (or is it thousands?) of Thais are sent abroad to study at strong universities around the world. These kids are chosen based on national exams, not social class, unless perhaps you count the indirect effects that made them better students. While abroad, they believe very strongly in their ability to make a difference and in the fairness of a world that gave them such an opportunity. Once home, they face a challenging reality with many frustrating cultural facets as discussed daily on this forum... they too sometimes feel like foreigners here.

My wife was abroad continously for undergraduate and postgraduate work, and I met many of her friends who were on similar billets. I could easily have used the words "innocent" and "sheltered" to describe their outlook relative to my American perspective. Every one I met ranks among the most idealistic and optimistic folks I know (not counting teenagers and college freshmen :-) ), and every one admitted that they had already, by the time we met, lost as much of these traits due to their worldly experiences.

What I find fascinating is that they are not naive or gullible people. They are survivors and acheivers, yet they have only a hint of the jaded cynicism that I and my Generation X peers acquired at home.

[nautilus]

ummmmmmmmm, sorry i asked, hehehehehe

[kwangandjo]

Btw, nobody mentioned that there are many Thai lesbians about, true or am I imagining it?

As I live in a university dorm on a campus, I see lots of students every day. My gf told me before that "It is sometimes hard to find REAL men here". And she was not only referring to ladyboys only. There are many guys who are somewhere in between of being a ladyboy and a "real" guy. And my gf doesn't mean that a real guy should be heavily muscled, have a deep voice, have to be hairly or something like that. Just a guy who acts like a guy. Not a guy who enters a girl's room and heads straight to the mirror to look if his hair is still nice, stroking his hair from time to time, likes to hang out with girls more.

I have by now a well-trained eye to spot the lesbians, the ladyboys (not hard) and the ones who don't really know yet what they like . And The last two categories form the majority of what I see. So I think shopgirl has a point there.

If you look well in the streets here, you will see that there are far more girls than guys in general. So I noticed the opposite of what I see back home. Girls chase guys. Some guys have several girlfriends. And these girls don't like it, but still don't want to loose him either. A friend of mine here said to his gf: "if I have to choose between you two, I choose noone". He still has both of them as noone is prepared to loose him 2 beautiful girls for a below-average looking guy, but at least he is a real guy

[shopgurl]

it seems you have misunderstood it the wrong way so why don't you take the time, go away, think, and keep on thinking before posting irreverent comments

Your opinion still no makes no sense.

Yes, many Thai women lead busy professional lives (just as millions of other women do in countries throughout the world), but I fail completely to see how this can be considered a "contributing factor to more interracial relationships with foreigners".

Sorry if this pisses you off - but you are wrong: that's just the way it is.

I have no reason to get pissed off since I, unlike you, do not think there's a right or wrong answer. But if you think that your ideas and viewpoints are much more understanding and correct of the Thai womens psyche, then so be it.

It seems to be quite agreeably that you fail to see and understand since you probably think that every woman in the world can find someone that easily and that they are happy and set in life. If you would just take the time to understand instead of trying to prove someone wrong then you'll see that there is a growing number of single Thai women and no I'm not saying that leads to more relationships with foreigners but I meant due to the number of straight men in a certain age group and maybe at times their infidelities that's known in the Thai society, these are some of the "contributing" reasons that a Thai women would look to a foreigner, which is not in all cases and which I don't agree with since infidelity has no race. BUT these are the facts, coming from real accounts of Thai women.

But if you still feel that I am wrong then I respect that since you probably have your own views that you stand by. But maybe instead of trying to find fault in my entries you can give your own views that you seem to be very knowledgeable of.

[mbkudu]

I'm all confused now.

[Tony0703]

Dear mbkudu,

let me explain? It is all very simple! They are not sheltered at all! They learn about life at a very early age! Especially if born in the countryside as they have to fight for everything due to most being brought into poverty! There should be no confusion here as they simply don't have a choice in many cases and they must learn quickly in all areas of life to survive! Unfortunately this means normally they will do absolutely anything (well almost) to help support the family...sometimes at their peril!!!! I think it is too hard a life at a very young age!

[mbkudu]

Yes Tony, I am aware of this; country girls definitely have the street smart edge over the rich city girl when it comes to survival. I am past this and understand it.

What I am confused about is the back and forth of Shopgurl and J. Moron. I think she is slowly losing her battle.

[Tony0703]

I've had another look and can see what you mean! Obviously they have strong views but don't know exactly how to express them without getting a little too emotional! This happens at times with some people who get caught up in a topic they feel strongly about! A little bit more rational explanation is needed here so you and I can understand fully as we both obviously get the main thrust it's just the finer detail that seems caught up in the emotion!

[Johnny Moron]

I have no reason to get pissed off since I, unlike you, do not think there's a right or wrong answer.  But if you think that your ideas and viewpoints are much more understanding and correct of the Thai womens psyche, then so be it. 

Regarding this little matter, I don't recall suggesting that a "right' answer exists; I am however of the opinion that a basic understanding of social anthropology leads one very firmly to the conclusion that wrong answers exist.

But I shall nit-pick no more. You are quite clearly an educated Thai women and, without wishing to appear patronising, you have an excellent command of the English language. What seems to me to be a little lacking though is an ability on your part to structure coherently an argument which you clearly believe in.

And yes, I do think that my understanding of the many issues which lead to Thai women marrying foreigners is broader, more intelligent and more evolved than yours.

[stroll]

Well done, Johnny, Shopgurl has left. One more down.

We don't really need a special 'men's forum'.

[Stocky]

Sorry Johnny, I preferred your spoof drooling idiot persona in a previous bar girl thread. Patronising Shopgurl and purporting a greater understanding of Thai women than Thai women leaves me less impressed.

[Bluecat]

Patronising Shopgurl and purporting a greater understanding of Thai women than Thai women leaves me less impressed.

Come on, Stocky, farang men know the Thai girls more than the Thai girls know themselves.

This is why they are soooo "successful" with them.

Isn't it,...?

[Stocky]

Patronising Shopgurl and purporting a greater understanding of Thai women than Thai women leaves me less impressed.

Come on, Stocky, farang men know the Thai girls more than the Thai girls know themselves.

This is why they are soooo "successful" with them.

Isn't it,...?

I'm sorry, how unfarang of me