"thai Women Vs Farang Women"

[Prakanong]

email [email protected] with your suggestions, LaoPo. But, as I have pointed out before, in threads that have had western men bashing in them, the bashers have almost always been other western men.

To be fair though this is probably not the forum where bashing of western men (or any men) by women is going to happen.

I bet there are forums though.

And if you were ever to listen to my mam, sister or dead nana talk about certain men it would put into shade any bashing of women here

[Prakanong]

Farang women also seem able to find Thai men attractive without having to slag off everything about Western men in the process.

Not exactly true. I've also heard western ladies bashing the lads with equal vigor.... ugly, overweight, slobs, losers that can't find a western woman in their own country. I often wonder why the ladies think this way as much as the lads bashing western women.

Totally agree - I have heard it plenty both in person and read it on internet forums (and plenty of newspapers).

As for why both think that way ie women saying the men are losers and can not get someone back home and the men saying all western women are not feminine, men haters etc - insecurity and self affirmation?

I admit I do find Asian women more attractive than most other women - not exclusively of course but it is a preference. I do not have to put one set down to elevate the others higher though. Its certainly not because I think they are subservient - you should meet my boss and lot of my colleagues as they are wll capable of standing their ground and ripping a new arsehol_e for most.

As for not getting a western women back home - well evidence would suggest otherwise but i have never married one or had to give up half a house or anything like that either

[Ulysses G.]

I try to be honest with myself and understand my attraction to Thai women. I think early on a lot of it was built on delusions, I then came to see what I felt was true and pursued it honestly. Early on I felt Thai women were more feminine in appearance and manner. This means less ball busting, more playful, affectionate and quirky. While I do think Thai culture at all levels creates a different type of woman than the west, the difference becomes less stark as you move up the economic ladder. As I got to know more Thais I learned a lot of the attention and what I felt were positive traits I was getting from Thai girls was based on economic disparity and myths they placed on my ability to take care. They were attracted to my wallet at the core but this does extend beyond me handing over baht. While no money no honey is at the core, I do feel they genuinely like me more than western woman, even poor western women who wouldn't be with me if I was handing out hundred dollar bills! My problem with western women is they have a problem with me. I am a social failure in the west. I cannot get a date or the attention of females no matter what I do. I am actually not that bad looking but am on the short side. I am definitely no alpha male in manner or appearance. It seems being farther down the pecking order of masculinity has not hurt me as much in Thailand. I have way more success getting dates and flirting with girls.

I don't have hang ups about my appearance and don't buy into the argument if I got over myself I could get girls here. The problem is they don't want me. No matter how confident I act my chances will only improve marginally, it's not worth the effort or the emotional drain and crippling effects of rejection after rejection to find the one girl who will give me the time of day and go for a walk in the park. I want sex and love like anyone and I can't get it here. Perhaps I am only getting sex and not love in Thailand as that baht is always lingering in the background but if it's a fantasy it sure feels a hel_l of a lot better than weekend after weekend alone in my apartment watching youtube instead of going out. So I don't like western women because they don't like me no matter what I may bring to the table or do to try to compensate for what I don't. Thai women are willing to give me the time of day. I find them physically appealing and it all seems to work out. It's true it's mostly the Isaan girls and not Bangkok Bed Super club girls but that doesn't bother me in the least. I don't want to be thrust in an arena with other guys competing to be rejected or deal with a what have you done for me lately women. The Isaan girls are humble and sexy to me. If it wasn't for them I wouldn't bother with Thailand.

This is the best post I've read in a long time and is probably true for 99% of the Western men in Thailand.

I really admire wasabi for being able to understand himself and the world around him enough to admit the truth!

[blizzard]

anyone notice issarn women have a ting for bald, ogeese, slovenly type farang..........lol.

[Pakboong]

For me, it was more than anything about time and other resources involved in dating western women. They were just too much work and took up too much of my time. I have been married to one of each with 10 plus years of dating after my last break-up. I now am back in Thailand living with a Thai girlfreind and the difference is simply matter ease of effort. I am a very busy guy and western women wanted too much of my time. Almost without exception. I have dated many.

[Prakanong]

anyone notice issarn women have a ting for bald, ogeese, slovenly type farang..........lol.

And long may it be so

[cdnvic]

anyone notice issarn women have a ting for bald, ogeese, slovenly type farang..........lol.

You just realized that as you looked around the house?

[farang prince]

At the age of 60, I guess I'm getting to the point where self-delusion is laughable. For point of reference, I've been married three times...twice to "western" women and once to an "eastern" woman. I'm now involved in a relationship with what Thais euphamistically call "The Third Sex."

Allow me some observations.

All relationships are an accomodation. There is a quid pro quo involved at every step along the way.

First, people everywhere want the same thing...security. The desire to have physical, financial and emotional security is paramount, regardless of race or social standing. This is a primal desire and transcends both genders. If you don't think this is so, watch what happens to a relationship when security disappears. If one of the partners withdraws financial security, arguments about money ensue and the relationship begins to weaken. If one of the partners begins to threaten physical security, such as beating their partner or creating verbal abuse, the relationship will weaken. If one of the partners withdraws emotional support, the relationship will weaken. This will happen East or West, North or South.

Second, the theory of "being in love" is delusionary. A very wise man once said "Love is the word used to label the sexual excitement of the young, the habituation of the middle-aged and the mutual dependence of the old." The sooner you realize this, the happier you will be and the more successful will be your relationship. Have you really discussed the theory of love with a Thai? If you have, you know that "kwahm ruk" isn't used that often in ordinary speech (not in honest conversation)...at least not in the same terms as we use it in the West. You might hear it after you have proven yourself as a suitable partner, one who is dependable and provides the necessary levels of security the partner is seeking. If early in your relationship with a Thai you tell them you "love" them, they will wonder about your emotional stability.

Third, realism is an essential ingredient to making a relationship work. My second marriage was wonderful. I went into it with a huge amount of trepidation and limited expectations because my first marriage was so terrible. But it worked. I had realistic expectations and my wife had been through two highly abusive relationships and when she realized that she was physically and emotionally secure in our relationship, she blossomed into a wonderful, thoughtful and very reliable partner. I only regret that breast cancer took her at such a young age and at the height of our joy together. My other two marriages failed, in part, because I didn't have realistic expectations and didn't understand what would be required to make the relationships work. In relationships that I'm familiar with between Eastern and Western partners, unrealistic expectations by one or both partners will lead to unhappiness and eventual failure.

Fourth, don't depend on sex to save your relationship. Sure sex is a primal instinct, almost as powerful as the need for security. But a bad relationship usually will influence the quality and quantity of the sex. One of the most brilliant things Socrates said was "As to marriage or celibacy, let a man take which course he will, for he will be sure to repent."

And lastly, Adam Smith had it right when he said "What can be added to the happiness of a man who is in good health, out of debt and has a clear conscience."

Good luck to all of you.

[LinkPopularity]

the point is of course that loser guy in UK/USA can only get ugly loser girls there, while here they can get beautiful loser girls

for most other people there's not much difference indeed

(although: here they don't have too much feminism, in the west they have totally corrupted it and went from feminism to bitchism)

[Neeranam]

anyone notice issarn women have a ting for bald, ogeese, slovenly type farang..........lol.

ogeese?

[Pakboong]

anyone notice issarn women have a ting for bald, ogeese, slovenly type farang..........lol.

ogeese?

If it is femininity you are after, get yourself a ladyboy. They float like butterflies.

[Polly]

Gotta love this thread.

Really though, you miss the point if you think it's all about money. It's not. Took me a while to realize this, but the reason why people enjoyed "the girlfriend experience" a decade ago and why it seems Thai girls are losing their charm today is because of the influx of Western programming.

Like it or not, men are biologically programmed to like women who are nuturing. They make better mothers for our children.

You can listen to all the Western propaganda you want and media programming saying strong, independent women are sexy, but the reality is, men want to marry women who are nuturing. Most men can't even articulate this, and they certainly can't understand why they find western women so unnattractive.

Western women for their part, also subconciously realize something is wrong, but they can't really understand it either. Western society doesn't allow for this kind of thought. Western ideas really started to infiltrate Thailand after the Vietnam war. The Thai women who were born in the early 80's, are very different from the generation before. They are very western. These are also the girls making up the new crop of comfort women. Not surprisingly, you hear alot fewer people these days talking about the great "girlfriend experience". As a rule, the older the girl and the less wealthy her family was during childhood, the closer the girl is to someone you want to marry. There are exceptions, but anecdotal evidence seems to favor this theory.

The girlfriend experience occurs naturally between any man and a nuturing woman, nationality aside. It does not happen between a man and a strong, independent woman. Sex might, but that is different. The more western Thai girls become, the less the distinction between them and their farang counterparts. Thai prostitutes may still be physically more appealing than their western counterparts, but even that will change soon.

If the OP is really tired of hearing this, all he has to do is wait 1 more decade. By that time, Western cultural influences will be so pervasive in Thailand that any distinction will be gone. Instead, we'll have a new board with a bunch of men claiming how they can't stand Thai women in favor of Laotian/Burmese/etc. women who have not yet lost their femininity.

Farang women are just as much a victim in the screwed up culture of the West as the men. It's not fair to criticize them. However, any Western woman who wants to be happy, can do so simply by abandoning the strong/independent mindset and adopting a nuturing personality, so it's within her power to change if she wants. Society won't help with this however.

That's the real distinction. It's not economics, and there is a huge difference between traditional Eastern culturals and the modern, diseased culture of the West.

With respect, I disagree totally with this.

Are you saying that Thai women are better mothers than western women?

No, western women know how to nurture children; they just don't want to be slaves or mothers to grown men.

And how would you know what goes on in the subconscious mind of western women? Western women aren't complaining and men who have enough confidence to have a relationship with a woman who is their equal are not either. Western women dont need your condescending advice that they can change, you are the one complaining, how about you changing your attitude if it matters to you so much.

It is about economics. Money is a great controller and the fact that western women are now financially independent of men and most Thai women are not, speaks volumes.

Lastly, most western women dont care what your preference in women is and if you are happy with a Thai woman, good on you, but.............why do you have to have an excuse?

Why do you have to say 'I like Thai women because western women ...................................and follows a multitude of different reasons?

Why cant you just like Thai women without there being anything negative about western women in it?

Why do you have to justify it?

[Suszzy]

WOW...Wasabi.!!

you sound like an honest man.

very good post!

totally respect

[Patsycat]

There is no reply. There is no reply to the fact that some big fat bastard is living with a 40 kilo girl who cuts his toenails and hand feeds him every day. And i WILL not do that at all. Because i have rights and am not a slave

[Sir Burr]

So, you're an average looking guy with an average job, working 9 to 5, 5 days a week.

You're young and single, looking forward to the weekend. Could this be the week that you finally meet a good girl?

You go shopping for a new shirt, you want to look your best on Friday night.

Friday evening you spend hours getting ready and finally head off to the pub, or, club.

You see a girl in a group that takes your fancy. You spend ages getting up the courage to approach her and try and think of a witty opening line.

You put down your drink and stride over to her. Before you can even open your mouth she has crushed you like an insect with some cutting remark. All her friends are laughing and you slink away with your face burning.

Happens to most guys at one time or another.

Contrast that with Thailand, where the man is the hunted. Why would any man that doesn't look like Brad Pitt and isn't as rich as Bill Gates bother with all the bullshit one has to go through in the West?

[britmaveric]

Seriously who wants that Patsy? My girlfriend would tell me to get stuffed I'd ask her to do that.

[britmaveric]

Contrast that with Thailand, where the man is the hunted. Why would any man that doesn't look like Brad Pitt and isn't as rich as Bill Gates bother with all the bullshit one has to go through in the West?

A challenge.....

[Sir Burr]

I'm not a gambling man. I like "sure things"

[Polly]

Before you can even open your mouth she has crushed you like an insect with some cutting remark. All her friends are laughing and you slink away with your face burnin

I am sure this has happened, but I have never seen it, although, I have seen groups of men in the same situation, laughing at and making obscene suggestions to girls as they walk past. Taunting girls who are not good looking or have extra large breasts or are fat.

Haven't you?

My point is that there are rude stupid people everywhere.

[Edonista]

(Someone here is telling us Thai women tend to be better in the 'Weight Department' - I wonder what he looks like?)

Considering he is the one who pays his weight is irrelevant

[Polly]

(Someone here is telling us Thai women tend to be better in the 'Weight Department' - I wonder what he looks like?)

Considering he is the one who pays his weight is irrelevant

Exactly!

And that is fine if that is what men want to do, but if you do that and are happy with it, why all the angst and insults to western women?

[britmaveric]

Exactly - no need for lads to insult ladies or ladies to insult lads. Let's be happy with another and respect one anothers' choices.

Edited October 31, 2007 by britmaveric

[mrtoad]

sir u have it wrong. ugly usa gurls r ugly to men all over. same with ugly thai gurls, just coz sum farang like em not so pretty doesnt mean all of a sudden they turn into swans.

there sure are some beeutiful poor thai chicks and more poor the other kind for sure...........lol.

ps im american and i dont automatically tink poor usa gurls r ugly unless they actually are.....lol.

Have you considered teaching english in LOS?

If you are going to clever, make sure you spell English correctly.

[Edonista]

There is no reply. There is no reply to the fact that some big fat bastard is living with a 40 kilo girl who cuts his toenails and hand feeds him every day.

Really I have much better uses for my 40kg girl then pedicure and hand feeding....

[JimmyCA]

To me it seems like 90% a function of money and 10% culture. If a somewhat educated man goes to a small town in the hills in Kentucky where finishing High school is an accomplishment he will be treated the same as a somewhat educated man that dates the village girls from thailand. The man will be quite popular in either situation. The same can be said for how rich thai girls vs rich farang girls act. A girl who went to Chalonglakorn university and who is waiting to take a position in management of her fathers 10 Million dollar corporation will be quite similar to a girl in the Western world in a similar situation. Neither one will be begging to find a man so that she can do his dishes and cook for him.

The only main difference is aesthetics in my opinion. Most poor girls in the states or England are ugly to us but may be considered attractive in other cultures. Most poor girls in Thailand are ugly to thias but attractive to some farang.

Another possible difference is the language/culture barrier. I think many farang give thais women the benefit of the doubt when they do something that seems stupid. Sometimes it is a cultural difference. Many times it is really just lack of education that is clearly visible to other thais. Thais will also give farang the benefit of the doubt if they step out of line. Maybe its a cultural thing or maybe the farang has social issues that would be seen a lot more clearly in their own country.

Anytime I hear someone say "I hate western women" it bothers me a bit inside. I feel like they are really saying "I hate women from the same socio-economic background as myself or above." Finding poor uneducated women who will date and serve men who are less attractive than them happens in any culture. Cultured and educated women from any culture will be more difficult to get and will probably be higher maintenance.

-Nick

*Disclaimer* I'm not saying dating Thais is bad. I'm not even saying dating uneducated girls is bad and I'm not implying that YOUR girlfriend is poor, thai, or uneducated. Do what makes you happy.

I think what is universally despised about western women is the western womans attitude. Some Asian women in the US have this same attitude so for all practical purposes they can be viewed western also. The general school of thought is any relationship these women should very limited in commitment, especially any financial / legal exposure. Unless you are interested in a life of misery, at the first hint of a western woman expecting marriage pull up your pants and run.

[Edonista]

(Someone here is telling us Thai women tend to be better in the 'Weight Department' - I wonder what he looks like?)

Considering he is the one who pays his weight is irrelevant

Exactly!

And that is fine if that is what men want to do, but if you do that and are happy with it, why all the angst and insults to western women?

Have you ever tried to consider that perhaps you (meaning not you personally, but the western women universe as a whole) deserve them ?

I mean, you even caused a mass migration of sex starved men from farang land to Asia. A thing comparable to religious migrations of past centuries. That should give you something to think upon.

Edited October 31, 2007 by Edonista

[Patsycat]

OK so i put my very petite size 37 foot in my rather large mouth. But come on guys and girls.... get a life even if it is tiny.

[pampal]

Wow

This thread is interesting,

western men and women espousing everything they despise in one another

[zaza]

[sbk]

What is always amazing to me is how many men here assume that it is impossible for a western guy to have a successful relationship with a western woman. There are literally MILLIONS of western people married or in relationships and some of them are even happy.

The fact is YOU find it impossible so please don't assume that your experience is universal.

And yes, brit, it would be nice if we could just accept our different tastes without the need to flame or be nasty but apparently some of the usual hard-core haters find that impossible.