Suing A Thai Lady

[RAZZELL]

Where does the OP say he was married?

RAZZ

[Boo]

if you do lose the lot then if i were you i would send a bulldozer round one day when no ones in and flatten the lot

and then get arrested & put away for destruction of a property that you have no legal claim to destroy lets not be silly now.

[MaiChai]

Divorces are messy everywhere? Foreigners are treated quite well when it comes to divorce in Thailand as there is no discrimination that you are a foreigner. Figure on a 50/50 split on the basis you paid for everything. Only thing is the Thai legal system is slow and you could find you legal bills expensive because the process is so drawn out, so if your legal bills are going to be more than 50% of what you get back, then it might be worth just writing it off and not put yourself through all the stress and grief.

Regarding buying houses, etc. My best advise would be to think of Thailand as a mans world and thus you must try and do everything in your name. If you want a house to share with your girlfriend, and assuming she is poor, then put it all in your name. Then when the relation goes tits up then she can just move out? Equality does not figure in my book when a poor girlfriend/wife could walk off with all your hard earned investment!

If you can't own it dont buy it, unless you are quite happy to loose it. Lets face it, houses in Thailand are cheap compared to Europe. Its your choice.

You can learn from others mistakes, or make them yourself and learn the hard way?

[Eric1949]

Thanks to all the positive responses to my problem, especially to Bino, JetsetBKK,Yorkman,ChangMai,Wintermute, & Tattoodrob. Yes I know I made the big mistake, and the only sin I am guilty of is Trust. I've learned my lession. I will win, I am extremely positive about that.

It's clear to see from the forum responses that some people do read before replying. Obviously some of the negative responses came from Thai women, who think that it is their god given right to rip falangs off.

Does anyone actually know someone who has won such a case?

Just to clarify the matter, I am not married to the lady in question. We made a "common law" agreement in the British Embassy. And yes I know that "common law" relationships are not recognised under Thai law.

[jazzbo]

"I am proceeding with other tactics, but cannot elaborate as I don't want anything to jeopardize the hearing."

So how do you really expect people to respond positive or otherwise as to winning a similar situation based on tactics that you do not divulge... and again, you do not state a basis for your claim in court.

[Eric1949]

"I am proceeding with other tactics, but cannot elaborate as I don't want anything to jeopardize the hearing."

So how do you really expect people to respond positive or otherwise as to winning a similar situation based on tactics that you do not divulge... and again, you do not state a basis for your claim in court.

Jazzbo, the reasons are very clear why I cannot divulge tactics. If someone reading this knows me and knows the lady, and tells them my tactics, she will be for warned. I assure you that they are not illegal.

My lady and I lived together for just over 5 years, as said, we were not married. We planned a future together. Morally, and yes I am aware that this is a rare quality in Thailand, we were man & wife. I shared my money with her, so in the case of a split up, I should be entitled to at least a 50% share of my money. She also has 2 houses, a condo, a plot of land, and a shared house in Bangkok. I funded more that 50% of one of her Bangkok houses. Greed is a terrible thing, as is jealousy (the cause of our relationship ending).

[Lucifer]

"I am proceeding with other tactics, but cannot elaborate as I don't want anything to jeopardize the hearing."

So how do you really expect people to respond positive or otherwise as to winning a similar situation based on tactics that you do not divulge... and again, you do not state a basis for your claim in court.

Jazzbo, the reasons are very clear why I cannot divulge tactics. If someone reading this knows me and knows the lady, and tells them my tactics, she will be for warned. I assure you that they are not illegal.

My lady and I lived together for just over 5 years, as said, we were not married. We planned a future together. Morally, and yes I am aware that this is a rare quality in Thailand, we were man & wife. I shared my money with her, so in the case of a split up, I should be entitled to at least a 50% share of my money. She also has 2 houses, a condo, a plot of land, and a shared house in Bangkok. I funded more that 50% of one of her Bangkok houses. Greed is a terrible thing, as is jealousy (the cause of our relationship ending).

I think you'll find, greed was the cause of your relationship ending. Jealousy was the excuse.

[jackr]

if you do lose the lot then if i were you i would send a bulldozer round one day when no ones in and flatten the lot

and then get arrested & put away for destruction of a property that you have no legal claim to destroy lets not be silly now.

... but at least he'll feel better and if he knows what he's doing, which he doesn't appear to, there's ways around most things here.

[blizzard]

i dont think courts were established to protect peeple from their own lack of judgement.if man wasnt defrauded or anything similiar, gun to head yadda yadda yadda, its too dam_n bad gurl took him to cleaners.

be a man and be happy she not eliminate you.

sirr you were guilty of being silly. which many times you end up paying for. stop rationalizing by saying you guilty of trust.

be a man and admit u were silly, cant say othetr word, not nice.......lol.

Edited December 31, 2007 by blizzard

[mikethevigoman]

sir it might help others if you cum clean and tell us wot happened.

if only one man can be saved froma a treacherous thai woman then yr experience will not have been in vain.

Ok Blizzard, I'll try to keep it short.

We met late 2000. Started living together late 2001, in Bangkok. We moved out of Bangkok late 2004, when I retired. I am now 58, she is 49. Early 2005 she started to get jealous (It is all in her mind, as I had never been with another woman. After almost 2 years of this, her accusations were getting dirtier and more intense, I told her I could not live with her anymore. She said she'd kill me if I left her. Anyway she and her daughter went to Bangkok in March 2007 and stayed away for 7 weeks. She never called me or anything. So I moved most of my stuff out of the house. Anyway, before she left I asked her for a 50/50 settlement. (I paid for everything, and still have receipts and bank transfers etc) She said no. I said that I would have to consult a lawyer, she said go ahead. My lawyer saw her, she said she wants all. We both went to see a senior monk, with my lawyer and her daughter. The monk told her she was a bad woman to me and she had better be careful as it may be her last time in this world. So I waited for 2 months to see if she'd change her mind. She didn't. We went to see a Court officer, and over 4 hours we came to a written compromise. We both signed it, this was in late September. In the compromise she acknowledges that I paid about 97%, and she had contributed about 3%. Now in court, she says she did not understand what she signed. The judge said it was too late to say that now. So she has now had the nxt hearing put back until Feb 2009. She is playing a game with me, and using any possible delaying tactic. There is also a lot of other things involved, but they were sorted out in the compromise. Only the land with the house remains for the judge to decide. But as I said she is delaying things. She wants a 4 day hearing, and 2009 is the first available. I am proceeding with other tactics, but cannot elaborate as I don't want anything to jeopardize the hearing. I am almost certain to get at least 50%. By the way my lawyer is on a no win no fee contract.

Im afraid if none of your friends told you of this possibility then you need to mix in different circles,.i fear you are about to join the ranks of blinkered farang,.ill bet she was from the "industry" as this imaginary jealousy is one of the signs, ( they trust no one )..im afraid the judge may well be thinking the same as some of us,,,i wish you luck, but if you get out with some money back thats what it will be, luck,.

[mikethevigoman]

Divorces are messy everywhere? Foreigners are treated quite well when it comes to divorce in Thailand as there is no discrimination that you are a foreigner. Figure on a 50/50 split on the basis you paid for everything. Only thing is the Thai legal system is slow and you could find you legal bills expensive because the process is so drawn out, so if your legal bills are going to be more than 50% of what you get back, then it might be worth just writing it off and not put yourself through all the stress and grief.

Regarding buying houses, etc. My best advise would be to think of Thailand as a mans world and thus you must try and do everything in your name. If you want a house to share with your girlfriend, and assuming she is poor, then put it all in your name. Then when the relation goes tits up then she can just move out? Equality does not figure in my book when a poor girlfriend/wife could walk off with all your hard earned investment!

If you can't own it dont buy it, unless you are quite happy to loose it. Lets face it, houses in Thailand are cheap compared to Europe. Its your choice.

You can learn from others mistakes, or make them yourself and learn the hard way?

id say once anything is put in someone elses name in thailand they consider it a gift from a fool,.

[mikethevigoman]

Getting a mortgage seems like a good buffer for not losing the lot. Failing that, a lease is surely a must if one buys outright. All the best anyway, op, and if she does get the lot, which is doubtful she will going by what's occurring, you could go the 10k route to pep yourself up a bit.

Just rent .much safer !

[mikethevigoman]

The chances of you coming out of this one financially intact is pretty slim to be honest.

No it is not, the chances are actually excellent that under Thai law he will receive 50%. The key issue is where the money came from to complete the purchase - if it came from overseas that proves his share of ownership, regardless of how the house is registered at the Land Office. Despite what we may like to think sometimes the facts are that Thai law is fair in many examples.

I realize it's a little late for the OP but the optimal way to manage such a purchase, and I refer to the house/structure here and not to the land, is to complete the sale/build and to register your ownership interest with the Land Office. The Land ownership can be in a different name but the land and the house must be linked in some way, e.g a lease document.

Isnt prostitution illegal under thai law ?,. if he walks with anything ill be surprised,. she will ( along with the lawyer ) wear him down, they have already adjourned til feb 09 !,. the best advice i have seen is dont spend more than you can afford to lose in thailand,. if in any doubt as to your partners motive rent and tell everyone you are skint,. that will sort out the men from the boys!,..( or the greedy bgs from the " mines different " bridgade,. !

[jackr]

Getting a mortgage seems like a good buffer for not losing the lot. Failing that, a lease is surely a must if one buys outright. All the best anyway, op, and if she does get the lot, which is doubtful she will going by what's occurring, you could go the 10k route to pep yourself up a bit.

Possibly, but that was not the OP asked.

And a reply to hint that you would, or indeed could resort to an underworld/mafia solution seems like pure Walter Mitty to me..

IMHO of course

Which doesn't seem to count for much.

[jazzbo]

Kuhn Eric -- It was not my purpose to have you divulge those tactics... it is just hard to comment on similar cases when the responder does not know the basis of the claim. I have found that the upper level courts in Thailand are quite reasonable when given a basis in law for an an action.

[lilBob]

if you do lose the lot then if i were you i would send a bulldozer round one day when no ones in and flatten the lot........then imagine her face when she gets home.....well ...back to land anyway hahahah

lets see her sue you over that!!!

It hurts me to say this as I am by proffesion a proffessional firefighter(maybe that's why I think this way) but a can of petrol and a match is cheaper.Please ensure the house is empty at the time.

Good Luck and watch your back. you may wan't to relocate till it's over.

I'm into the saying" revenge is a meal best tasted cold". So after all is settled I'd pay a lady or two and send your now ex-wife some porno pictures of yourself with other ladies

[yorkman]

Kuhn Eric -- It was not my purpose to have you divulge those tactics... it is just hard to comment on similar cases when the responder does not know the basis of the claim. I have found that the upper level courts in Thailand are quite reasonable when given a basis in law for an an action.

Exactly Jazzbo....

Eric, OK you cannot divulge "tactics", whatever that is, but can you for certain say that you have a good case in law? Are you relying on that "compromise"? If that was a properly executed contract between you and her and it is an agreeable solution to you (only the fact that it was your money counts for nothing) then fine.

If you can, well I have had to deal with a timewaster. A completely different matter but the same applies.

Take the whole matter back to the court officer (was this one of the local civil prosecutors by the way, or?) . They absolutely hate THEIR court (yes thats the way they see it ) having it's time wasted. I got a hearing that was put off for 8 months, pulled back to 3 weeks, at which point the other party caved in, but only because the law was on our side, and they knew it.

[Flow]

Obviously it was a mistake of your part and you're paying the price. This is Thailand and this happens all the time, foreigners who believe and trust their "lovely" new lady. My advice: try what you can in a Thai court to get back what you can. You've got nothing to lose anyway. You may win you may fail. In any case, keep us posted here as to the outcome....

Good luck!

[Eric1949]

Obviously it was a mistake of your part and you're paying the price. This is Thailand and this happens all the time, foreigners who believe and trust their "lovely" new lady. My advice: try what you can in a Thai court to get back what you can. You've got nothing to lose anyway. You may win you may fail. In any case, keep us posted here as to the outcome....

Good luck!

Thanks Flow.

As you say I've nothing to lose. I am retired and on a reasonable pension, and now have nothing else to do. I no longer support my ex girlfriend or her daughter, so my pension is my own. As said, my lawyer is on a no win, no fee. She is the one who will struggle, and I'm truly sorry about that. She has a lawyer from Bangkok, and I would think it costs her a small fortune everytime he has to come to court. We are one hour by plane or 11 hours by other transport. I'm sure she is not on a no win, no fee.

[jayjayjayjay]

You would never dream of putting a house in your girlfriend's/wife's name back in your home country, so why do it here? I just don't get it.

Coz the laws here do not allow individual foreigner to own land and building.

The law here does not allow a farang to own land but a farang can own a building.

Do you meant condo building or legally registered farang company that own a building. Care to clarify?

CM is correct that someone else can own the land, you, if a farang person (no need to be a company), can build and own the house on that land. You also have the ability to take out a lease on the land... someone better in the know can give you the lease terms etc. You would have to agree on the house value and as to whether the owner of the land is to buy the house from you in the event of cancellation or transfer of the lease, again, someone better in the know will have to explain this better than me.

[jayjayjayjay]

Yes I know about registering a company name to buy land and build a house...but I didn't.

So now I am looking forward, not back.

I put everything in my lady's name. Things have gone sour. I left the house in March 07, because of threats. We have been to court 3 times already. There is a good chance that I will win, and get back at least 50%. She has now delayed the next case hearing until Feb 09.

Has anyone been successful in suing a Thai lady in a similar situation?

please PM the op for more information

Eric, ensure the settlement by the courts requires sales fund from the house to be transferred into "your account", NOT she sells the house and pays you later the 50/50 share. All aspects of sales duty etc must be shown and clearly recorded in the court documentation as to how and when, means of selling the house, agreement on price, agent to be used, minumum price, etc, if not, she will squeeze and cheat at every impass. Chances are you will not see the money from the sale for a long long time. You may even have to return to court a second time, chances are she would have spent the money already. Once they have there hands on cash it is worse than just having the house. Make sure you've got this worked out in detail with your lawyer, present the court with 2 or 3 options for means of disposal of the asset and/or her taking a loan on the house and means of payment settlement. This part of the settlement will be crutial as to when and if you get your money. This must all be clearly stated in court documents.

[torrenova]

She also has 2 houses, a condo, a plot of land, and a shared house in Bangkok. I funded more that 50% of one of her Bangkok houses. Greed is a terrible thing, as is jealousy (the cause of our relationship ending).

So you funded 50% of a hiouse in Bangkok and you agreed to pay 97% of the costs for this new house ? Where do you think she got the other property from ? And why was she not willing to sell one to go 50/50 with you on this one ?

I'm sorry you were not better informed but you have done nothing to help yourself with what you have done. Do you honestly think I would even go buy a house or build one in some 1st world country without protecting my investment ? Like hel_l would I buy one for a woman who seems to have a history of collecting houses and other property. Her name's not Zsa Zsa Gabor is it ?

[dogleg]

"I am proceeding with other tactics, but cannot elaborate as I don't want anything to jeopardize the hearing."

So how do you really expect people to respond positive or otherwise as to winning a similar situation based on tactics that you do not divulge... and again, you do not state a basis for your claim in court.

Jazzbo, the reasons are very clear why I cannot divulge tactics. If someone reading this knows me and knows the lady, and tells them my tactics, she will be for warned. I assure you that they are not illegal.

My lady and I lived together for just over 5 years, as said, we were not married. We planned a future together. Morally, and yes I am aware that this is a rare quality in Thailand, we were man & wife. I shared my money with her, so in the case of a split up, I should be entitled to at least a 50% share of my money. She also has 2 houses, a condo, a plot of land, and a shared house in Bangkok. I funded more that 50% of one of her Bangkok houses. Greed is a terrible thing, as is jealousy (the cause of our relationship ending).

I think you'll find, greed was the cause of your relationship ending. Jealousy was the excuse.

I think Greed was the cause of your relationship starting and ending! Sorry mate, time to wise up!

Good Luck.

[HobbsTheFerociousTiger]

I've resisted opening this topic until now, and now I actually wonder what the question is.. Yes divorce settlements are done all the time; they take time but they're reasonably fair in most cases. That's it. Anything else is hard to comment on because not all information in supplied..

Next..

[tamsin]

What would be the best advice I can give a very nice man who is about to throw his life savings away on some tart who has persuaded him to buy her a house. She won't marry him (wonder why ...?), claims kid's his but Thai man's name on birth cert (yawn). 30 year lease orrrrrrr, usufruct. Dear God, some of you, really ...

[tattoodrob]

if you do lose the lot then if i were you i would send a bulldozer round one day when no ones in and flatten the lot........then imagine her face when she gets home.....well ...back to land anyway hahahah

lets see her sue you over that!!!

It hurts me to say this as I am by proffesion a proffessional firefighter(maybe that's why I think this way) but a can of petrol and a match is cheaper.Please ensure the house is empty at the time.

Good Luck and watch your back. you may wan't to relocate till it's over.

I'm into the saying" revenge is a meal best tasted cold". So after all is settled I'd pay a lady or two and send your now ex-wife some porno pictures of yourself with other ladies

The only problem i can see with this is that maybe the fire doesnt destroy the whole lot(or gets out out!) and she can still live there somehow.....whereas my way she would have to rebuild at large expense or only at best have the land to sell...having to clear the rubble.hmmmmm revenge ......burning the house down not enough for you???......i like your style mister......not sure photos would bother her as much as anything that would make her poorer somehow as money seems to be number 1 here(which is a shame)

[tattoodrob]

if you do lose the lot then if i were you i would send a bulldozer round one day when no ones in and flatten the lot

and then get arrested & put away for destruction of a property that you have no legal claim to destroy lets not be silly now.

... but at least he'll feel better and if he knows what he's doing, which he doesn't appear to, there's ways around most things here.

exactly..she would have to prove he had anything to do with it and with a watertight alibi(ie not in the country etc) it would be difficult.obviously after cannot go usual places that she knows of buy hey small sacrifice.im not suggesting he do it im just saying what i would do

[jackr]

if you do lose the lot then if i were you i would send a bulldozer round one day when no ones in and flatten the lot

and then get arrested & put away for destruction of a property that you have no legal claim to destroy lets not be silly now.

... but at least he'll feel better and if he knows what he's doing, which he doesn't appear to, there's ways around most things here.

exactly..she would have to prove he had anything to do with it and with a watertight alibi(ie not in the country etc) it would be difficult.obviously after cannot go usual places that she knows of buy hey small sacrifice.im not suggesting he do it im just saying what i would do

Yep, balls to serving the revenge dish cold. Get em all in there and pull it down Mel Gibson style, Lethal Weapon II

[Colonel_Mustard]

if you do lose the lot then if i were you i would send a bulldozer round one day when no ones in and flatten the lot

and then get arrested & put away for destruction of a property that you have no legal claim to destroy lets not be silly now.

... but at least he'll feel better and if he knows what he's doing, which he doesn't appear to, there's ways around most things here.

exactly..she would have to prove he had anything to do with it and with a watertight alibi(ie not in the country etc) it would be difficult.obviously after cannot go usual places that she knows of buy hey small sacrifice.im not suggesting he do it im just saying what i would do

Yep, balls to serving the revenge dish cold. Get em all in there and pull it down Mel Gibson style, Lethal Weapon II

I wonder if the lady in question will get some lethal weapon thoughts of her own, especially if she thinks she might lose.

Edited January 3, 2008 by Colonel_Mustard

[tattoodrob]

What would be the best advice I can give a very nice man who is about to throw his life savings away on some tart who has persuaded him to buy her a house. She won't marry him (wonder why ...?), claims kid's his but Thai man's name on birth cert (yawn). 30 year lease orrrrrrr, usufruct. Dear God, some of you, really ...

hello excuse me if im wrong but i dont think OP was persuaded to buy her a house ,i think he made the choice thru what he believed to be love(at the time.....and they did last 5 years so maybe love or she thought she could squeeze more out of him over time).he also didnt say she wouldnt marry him,he just said they werent married,maybe he didnt want to marry.i also dont think she claimed child was his as hes only been with her aprox 5 years and her daughter is an adult!!!

i am worried that he didnt wonder why she had so much property/land already.....this is a big clue to her greed as im sure was not bought by her,but maybe im wrong.

im sure she may have been to court previously and won all the properties she has ,which is why she may not give up easily although im sure she dont like spending money on a lawyer and travelling so it is god you dont just give up as thats what she will be hoping for.good luck