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Posted

I'm going to be visiting Thailand for a couple of months. I have several dinner dates lined up with some educated Thai ladies that are in the business world (no, not that business). I am 61 and they are 40-55 years old. I'd like to bring something unique from the US when I come over. Not too expensive because I don't want to give any impression other than that I appreciate their company for dinner.

I'd like some thoughts on what might be something they would appreciate that they might not be able to get over there.

Thanks.

Tony

Posted
I'd like some thoughts on what might be something they would appreciate that they might not be able to get over there.

The gesture and the uniqueness are far more important than the cost. A few thoughts ...

Something small, cute and feminine is always appreciated. Something small that you can easily carry on the airplane.

Where are you from? What is unique and made specifically from your home area?

It's a little hot for Thailand, but whenever I went to Vegas I would always bring back some boxes of "Ethel M" chocolates, usually the ones with different apertifs in them.

Small little music boxes or jewelry boxes are usually appreciated.

Do you know anything about the women, such as likes and dislikes, favorite colors?

If you are from Europe, there are unique handmade things available from everywhere.

You could bring a nice bottle of wine, a different one for each. They may have never seen a corkscrew before, so maybe a fancy decorative one to accompany the bottle.

Fragrances are nice, but quality perfumes are expensive even in small quantities.

Decide on a price range and treat all the same, whether it's $20 or $100 or whatever.

A nice touch is to also accompany the gift with a flower. A big huge bouquet is overkill for a casual or introductory date. But a single, ultra-fresh flower can be a nice touch. But flowers are tough in the heat. Fresh flowers have to be kept cool. When I give flowers to a woman as a gift, they have to be immaculate.

Good luck. Have fun.

Posted
I'm going to be visiting Thailand for a couple of months. I have several dinner dates lined up with some educated Thai ladies that are in the business world (no, not that business). I am 61 and they are 40-55 years old. I'd like to bring something unique from the US when I come over. Not too expensive because I don't want to give any impression other than that I appreciate their company for dinner.

I'd like some thoughts on what might be something they would appreciate that they might not be able to get over there.

Thanks.

Tony

Say it with flowers or a bath towel with the stars and stripes.

Posted
I'm going to be visiting Thailand for a couple of months. I have several dinner dates lined up with some educated Thai ladies that are in the business world (no, not that business). I am 61 and they are 40-55 years old. I'd like to bring something unique from the US when I come over. Not too expensive because I don't want to give any impression other than that I appreciate their company for dinner.

Tony

Say it with flowers or a bath towel with the stars and stripes.

Your words sounds like these are a series of first time meetings. If that is the case, I would think no gift. No one in Thailand gives gifts upon meeting someone, just like no one does in the US.

OK, someone will say they do, but 99% of the time it is not done. It makes the giver appear "needy" and usually gives the recipient worry about the intent and/or the giver.

How you treat them during the meal and afterwards will tell whether you appreciate their company. Specially if you take them to a nice restaurant with table cloths, nice cutlery, etc.

The only time I have seen Thais give gifts is, for example, after spending a week in my home or, if they are friends, bringing me something for which their home province is famous.

Qwertz's recommendation of flowers is a good one for when you leave or after you have had several interaction. So if these are not first time dinners/meetings, you can order from a local florist on line to be delivered with a nice note.

Posted
I'm going to be visiting Thailand for a couple of months. I have several dinner dates lined up with some educated Thai ladies that are in the business world (no, not that business). I am 61 and they are 40-55 years old. I'd like to bring something unique from the US when I come over. Not too expensive because I don't want to give any impression other than that I appreciate their company for dinner.

Tony

Say it with flowers or a bath towel with the stars and stripes.

Your words sounds like these are a series of first time meetings. If that is the case, I would think no gift. No one in Thailand gives gifts upon meeting someone, just like no one does in the US.

OK, someone will say they do, but 99% of the time it is not done. It makes the giver appear "needy" and usually gives the recipient worry about the intent and/or the giver.

How you treat them during the meal and afterwards will tell whether you appreciate their company. Specially if you take them to a nice restaurant with table cloths, nice cutlery, etc.

The only time I have seen Thais give gifts is, for example, after spending a week in my home or, if they are friends, bringing me something for which their home province is famous.

Qwertz's recommendation of flowers is a good one for when you leave or after you have had several interaction. So if these are not first time dinners/meetings, you can order from a local florist on line to be delivered with a nice note.

You're right. These are first time meetings.

Your point are very well taken. I think I will let the dinner at a nice place speak for itself. Maybe I'll take a couple of gifts in case things develop into more than just one dinner. I'll also pick up a few T-shirts from my area and toss them in the bag in case the ladies have kids. The way to a woman's heart is through her children.

Thanks very much to all for the suggestions and advice.

Tony

Posted

you are 61 and looking for dates with the easiest girl in the world over the internet

DEFINATELY a gift would make you look 100% desperate instead of 98%

for your own sake, please do not bring a gift. They still dont know your desperation levels and this gift will just make them know right away if you engage in multiple encounters

Posted
you are 61 and looking for dates with the easiest girl in the world over the internet

DEFINATELY a gift would make you look 100% desperate instead of 98%

for your own sake, please do not bring a gift. They still dont know your desperation levels and this gift will just make them know right away if you engage in multiple encounters

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=definately

pretty please

Posted
you are 61 and looking for dates with the easiest girl in the world over the internet

DEFINATELY a gift would make you look 100% desperate instead of 98%

for your own sake, please do not bring a gift. They still dont know your desperation levels and this gift will just make them know right away if you engage in multiple encounters

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=definately

pretty please

i speak 4 language at 21

how many did u speak at 21?

english not being my native one, plus living in thailand kind of screws me up?

but nice try internet tough star

Posted
you are 61 and looking for dates with the easiest girl in the world over the internet

DEFINATELY a gift would make you look 100% desperate instead of 98%

for your own sake, please do not bring a gift. They still dont know your desperation levels and this gift will just make them know right away if you engage in multiple encounters

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=definately

pretty please

i speak 4 language at 21

how many did u speak at 21?

english not being my native one, plus living in thailand kind of screws me up?

but nice try internet tough star

OK, so your language skills are proven.

Now, about your social skills and compassion...

OP posed a very reasonable question, and did not deserve your scathing reply.

He did not come across as desperate (imho)

At 21 you are a long way from 61 and an appreciation of OP's position. I imagine it is no fun to be 61 and lonely for good female company.

Please be thoughtful of people's feelings.

Tom.

Posted

A little of my own experience....Thai people generally will not open gifts when given, they wait until later and open them privately (perhaps more modern folks don't follow this custom, but the age bracket concerned may observe it)

Also, perfume given as a gift to a potential mate is considered bad luck (according to my wife) as the odor fades....so will your love.

I would bring things from your particular area. Myself, from New England, bring maple syrup from Vermont, salt water taffy from cape cod, a local gemstone etc....This way there is a story to go with the gift and a connection to your home.

I would say no gift on the first date...maybe a rose....but save gifts for later.

If you get serious.....Thai gold is the one that will have her swooning :o

Good luck,

Eric

Posted

Pumpuiman, you are right on with your comment about perfume.

I travel a lot for work, and often pick up perfume in duty free for my wife,

But I am not allowed to give it as a gift. I have to "sell" it to her for a few Baht.

She never explained the reason, and I never asked.

But it does illustrate that giving a gift to a Thia carries hidden messages and undercurrents that Farangs could never imagine.

I doubt a Thai would ever let you know outright that you had sent the wrong message (maybe why it is traditional to open the present later).

But it could certainly start (or finish) a relationship on the wrong foot.

J.

Posted
Pumpuiman, you are right on with your comment about perfume.

I travel a lot for work, and often pick up perfume in duty free for my wife,

But I am not allowed to give it as a gift. I have to "sell" it to her for a few Baht.

She never explained the reason, and I never asked.

But it does illustrate that giving a gift to a Thia carries hidden messages and undercurrents that Farangs could never imagine.

I doubt a Thai would ever let you know outright that you had sent the wrong message (maybe why it is traditional to open the present later).

But it could certainly start (or finish) a relationship on the wrong foot.

J.

This has drifted farther than the simple question I asked. Several people are trying to assess my motives, bringing in the number of languages I spoke at 21 as relevant (??) and trying to assess my desperation level (as if somebody has to be desperate to just want to do the right thing on a dinner date). At a point in your life, it is nice just to have dinner with a nice lady without expecting sex later that evening. If a relationship develops later, that's great. If not, you had a nice dinner and an enjoyable evening.

So, I got the answers I needed and some good advice. I thank you for that.

To the others, I would ask that you don't try to see other peoples motives and actions through your own narrow view. Accept that there may be something beyond what you see and allow them to have a motivation for their actions that might just be different from what your would be.

Let's call it a day on this topic.

Tony

Posted
you are 61 and looking for dates with the easiest girl in the world over the internet

DEFINATELY a gift would make you look 100% desperate instead of 98%

for your own sake, please do not bring a gift. They still dont know your desperation levels and this gift will just make them know right away if you engage in multiple encounters

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=definately

pretty please

You won't make too many friends here nitpicking over 1 misspelled letter!...(welcome to the internet)

Posted
you are 61 and looking for dates with the easiest girl in the world over the internet

DEFINATELY a gift would make you look 100% desperate instead of 98%

for your own sake, please do not bring a gift. They still dont know your desperation levels and this gift will just make them know right away if you engage in multiple encounters

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=definately

pretty please

You won't make too many friends here nitpicking over 1 misspelled letter!...(welcome to the internet)

Well, to tell you the truth, it was more the condescending tone of this poster that got up my nose, but I tried to stay polite.

And if the kid is such a scholar, he should appreciate the site.

Posted
...Let's call it a day on this topic.

Yes, from the posts after the above it does indeed seem that nothing further is being said on topic.

:o

--

Maestro

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