Clever Dumping Of Gf/bf

[cluezo]

What was your most clever way you got out of a relationship unscathed?

[gymshark]

Told her I had to go on a secret mission on a submarine and I would call her if and when I made it back. Nice.

[cluezo]

Told her I had to go on a secret mission on a submarine and I would call her if and when I made it back. Nice.

Smooth....

[surface]

I tried, but failed.

Moved in the middle of the night, but she found me, many miles away, in about 8 hours.

I'm starting to hate this place.

Edit: The relationship is over, and has been over in my mind for quite some time, but the remnants of it just seem to linger on, haunting me...

Edited June 6, 2008 by surface

[jaiyenyen]

This was not my get-out line, so I can't claim any of the glory.

When I was an apprentice plumber, many years ago, I worked with a tradesman called Frank, a lovely bloke, who, unbeknown to me, had been Knocking off one of the customers.

One afternoon, when we had finished all our job's, we went back to the yard to sort out the next day's work.

The office girl shouted out " Frank, Mrs ?????? keeps calling to ask when you would like to go back and fix her dripping tap"

Frank's get-out line was " Tell her I've gone to Kharachi to mend a ballvalve, and I don't know when I'll be back"

Don't you just love 'plumbing terms', they are so full of innuendo.

[boiledegg]

What was your most clever way you got out of a relationship unscathed?

Explained that i cant break the 3 day rule for her.

[jkinbkk]

I packed my bags and jumped on a flight to Asia (13 years ago )

[Travel2003]

When I was in the Navy, that alone was an excuse many times.

Have to sail. I dont know where. Cant say where. Cant say for how long I will be away.

Unlimited of excuses based upon we had to sail.

[TEFLMike]

Sing the famous song of Very Lynn.

'We'll Meet Again, Don't Know where, Don't Know Whennnnnnnnnn' !

I may have trouble the next few days.. She hate Pattaya and said to me that when I leave here, she will go home . (YEH, RIGHT)!

[thecatman]

Blimey.......is that the time!!!!!

[Briggsy]

Cut the money supply.

[grantbkk]

In early 2003 I had a live-in girlfriend in California. A wealthy friend of mine happened to be drolling all over her. I said I was leaving the country and could my girlfriend stay in one of his spare bedrooms. Like clockwork I was single and free and at no cost. It is considered by many to be one of the slickest getaways ever.

[cluezo]

In early 2003 I had a live-in girlfriend in California. A wealthy friend of mine happened to be drolling all over her. I said I was leaving the country and could my girlfriend stay in one of his spare bedrooms. Like clockwork I was single and free and at no cost. It is considered by many to be one of the slickest getaways ever.

Smoooooooth move! Real nice....

[a2396]

Cut the money supply.

Yes, works every time.

[cluezo]

Blimey.......is that the time!!!!!

[Shotime]

Cutting off the money or finding her another ATM doesn't always work in the long term. You have to sit very quiet and make them feel sorry for you. I also know a guy whose Thai GF left him, but that was because of his personality. He didn't really do anything.

[simon43]

Shame to say but I left my English wife (many years ago) by saying 'I'm just popping out to Tescos...'

Simon

[joskydive]

Just asked a friend what he would say and he just tells them - his wife doesn't like him staying out late. I guess that means no free ATM.

Me, I just say, very sweetly, of course. - If you love me, have a stud put in your thingy so we can both have a good time.

Amazing how I never see the guy again, that's apart from one who did, so, then I came to Thailand.

[happyending]

im working on one right now

a combination job

first, the moneys running low - business is not so good

bring this one on over time

also, must go back home to check on business status

tie this one in with a visa finishing

[vanish on visa trip]

family illness is a good backup

nana/mother/sister is sick - may die soon

must go back to see her one more time

[exit to next resort town]

if in real doubt

listen to neil simons '50 ways to leave your lover'

'just slip out the back jack'

'make a new plan stan'

'no need to be coy roy'

just listen to me

'hop on the bus gus'

'no need to to discuss much'

'just drop off the key lee'

and get yourself free

[Antimony]

Easy. Just do the "fade".

[cluezo]

Easy. Just do the "fade".

Ah...yes... the "fade" ...never fails...

[Chang_paarp]

My ex had a smooth one.

Picked me up from work, went to put my stuff in the boot, and there was my bag packed for me. Got back to the house she said "I'm taking Jr to the park and I don't want you here when we get back"

Lazy so and so didn't pack all my stuff so I went back the next day for it. She forgot that all the utilities were in my name, gave 36 hours to change them into her name.

That started a long and ugly divorce process.

[cluezo]

My ex had a smooth one.

Picked me up from work, went to put my stuff in the boot, and there was my bag packed for me. Got back to the house she said "I'm taking Jr to the park and I don't want you here when we get back"

Lazy so and so didn't pack all my stuff so I went back the next day for it. She forgot that all the utilities were in my name, gave 36 hours to change them into her name.

That started a long and ugly divorce process.

Look on the brighght side..you're FREE!

[NanLaew]

In 1994, I went to Vegas with a 'serious' girlfriend that I was thinking of ditching. She went from 0 to +3000 within a few hours at the tables the night we arrived. I hate gambling (but appreciated the free booze while in her company). Eventually I tried to persuade her to cash her chips while she was ahead but she wanted 'one more game' so I went to the room to sleep. There was a fax waiting for me saying I needed to be in Havana the following day and tickets were set up for me in Houston so I booked myself on the red-eye special, packed my bag and went to bed. At 5am, she creeps into bed all teary because not only did she lose it all, but she also went into further 800 buck hole on her weekend holiday money. I patted her on the cheek and said never mind, got up and got dressed (it was time to get to the airport after all). To this day she still thinks her bad gambling habit was the reason I walked out.

More musical inspiration....

"If you see me gettin' smaller, I'm leavin'

I don't be free here

Just got to get away from here

If you see me gettin' smaller don't worry

And no hurry

I've got the right to disappear."

Thank you Waylon Jennings (written by Jimmy Webb)

[sceadugenga]

Why do you think SMS messaging/texting was invented?

[cluezo]

Why do you think SMS messaging/texting was invented?

[harleyclarkey]

Mate phones you. Look serious and worried. Begin to pack and fuss over her. Apologise and tell her you just can't talk about what is happening. Car pulls up and guy/mate hopes out. Sense of dire urgencey, whispered brief conversation. Long loving kiss to herself. say "Goverment business but I'll be back as soon as I can, DON'T worry. Ill be fine" Then just bugger off!!!!

[Shotime]

Mate phones you. Look serious and worried. Begin to pack and fuss over her. Apologise and tell her you just can't talk about what is happening. Car pulls up and guy/mate hopes out. Sense of dire urgencey, whispered brief conversation. Long loving kiss to herself. say "Goverment business but I'll be back as soon as I can, DON'T worry. Ill be fine" Then just bugger off!!!!

What if it's your apartment? Clever? Nice bike.

Edited June 9, 2008 by Shotime

[mmushr00m]

Tried something like the above once.

Got all my stuff from her place, mates pulled up in a car, threw everything in and took off.

She called my mom and said that she thought I was in trouble and it was probably the law or drugs involved.

[Gary A]

If you don't have enough moral fortitude to honestly tell the person that it's not working and you want to end it, then you have no business being in a relationship to start with.

Quite frankly, I don't find doing a runner amusing.