What Most, If Not All, Farang Cannot Give A Thai Girl

[Sunderland]

The OP is entitled to their point of view, although it was somewhat cloudy what they were getting at.

In my experience you can find a wife from a decent family who will be more than content and equally enthralled when going on a date with a foreign or Thai man.

My wife did not study/work abroad when I first met her. We went on dates together. We didn't, and still don't after being together for 8 years, feel the need to go on 'team' dates! If we go out out with other people, then we go out with her friends, my friends or her family. She has now worked abroad for 4 years on an airline and apart from being a wee bit more confident hasn't changed much at all.

As for Thai friends, there are people I know I can rely on for help, but nobody other than my wife that I feel I want to tell all my darkest secrets to. If I want to talk about the things she isn't interested in (football, politics, etc) then it's quite easy to find foreigners with equal interests. If you don't want a really indepth conversation, you can even discuss these points with a local taxi driver.

[scyriacus]

much to my surprise most farangs here measure thais with their own farang scale. i've seen quite a few thais, goin' to get married with a girl, they never even saw before! just because their parents had pre-arranged. and most thais marry their likes first, have children, being disappointed and left on their own and then and only then try out a farang. so what they think (if they would do it the western way) depends on their education, age, experience and so on and is an ever changing matter. only after many tasted the sweet drug of atm-money, they're hooked forever and never go back, only get more & more refined from farang to farang.....could only someone tell me, what a 'decent' girl is? and why on earth some of them farangs want to have (possess?) one?

[TheDon]

You cant give them TheDon's special treatment, You should hear what the ladies say about my buns also.

Im everything a woman can want. But most only get to dream about me. If you go tell your misses that you saw me make a post on here today, you might get lucky tonight from the joy my name even brings.

[Kerryd]

You cant give them TheDon's special treatment, You should hear what the ladies say about my buns also.

Im everything a woman can want. But most only get to dream about me. If you go tell your misses that you saw me make a post on here today, you might get lucky tonight from the joy my name even brings.

Wow. Is ThaiVisa big enough to handle both you and steveromagnino ? Is Thailand big enough ?

(ps: the last time I told a girl that my name was "TheDon", she slapped me so hard it bruised my passport photo !)

[indiefan]

not in NY- it is the most multicultural city in the world

Toronto is the most multi-cultural city in the world there Yank.

[TheDon]

You cant give them TheDon's special treatment, You should hear what the ladies say about my buns also.

Im everything a woman can want. But most only get to dream about me. If you go tell your misses that you saw me make a post on here today, you might get lucky tonight from the joy my name even brings.

Wow. Is ThaiVisa big enough to handle both you and steveromagnino ? Is Thailand big enough ?

(ps: the last time I told a girl that my name was "TheDon", she slapped me so hard it bruised my passport photo !)

Im surprised she didnt uppercut you pretending to be me. Being me is no easy task, just think of everything opposite to you

[steveromagnino]

steve,

"can he be trusted"

is this really a concern for upper class thai girls? i thought they just accepted that their bf's/husbands would cheat on them or do you mean 'trust' in a different way than fidelity?

well it is true that many Thai women are equally concerned about their Thai husbands (and believe me there are a ton of Thai couples nowadays where any infidelity on either side would be completely unacceptable). Only some farangs actually beleive that there are ton of upper class women willing to turn a blind eye to their husband's indescretions (or wifes) - check out Rika Dila or the host of public spats about cheating and infedelity - times have changed.

However, the reputation of some western men with some women is that

-some think they will not only be unfaithful, but they will do it in a way that is far less discrete (i.e. they don't know 'how' to do it so nobody knows anything)

-some think they are as wandering as Thai men or worse, especially if in a position of power

-some may base their opinion having seen well known womanising examples e.g. the California Wow guy, the guy that married into royalty, the Loreal guy, the now deceased so called 'James Bond', etc

Also with regards to lack of trust beyond just infidelity, the various examples of being cheated etc are well known e.g. the guy who got involved with Pui Porntip, etc and certainly dwarfed by the cheats and rogues of Thai ethnicity; however the alarm bells might go off for some on the basis that the warning and detection systems don't work with a foreign culture in all respects.

As for how legendary I am, obviously my original posts were extremely tongue in cheek and went right over the heads of many; maybe I am not nearly as good with the keyboard as I thought.

Edited July 6, 2008 by steveromagnino

[kat]

If your daughter was disgusted by expats she met, you have to ask what she is doing meeting disgusting expats, and why you and her find yourself among them...easily avoided...and if not why are you there...what does it tell you?

Yes you are pre-judging, but many of your problems seem of your own making... They say more about yourself than anything. BTW I wouldn't want to live n

Because the "disgusting" expats easily find her, and eagerly seek her out in Thailand wherever she goes, regardless of who or what she is. The fact that you ignore this and then attempt to place blame on her simply for being there says a lot about YOU.

hi steve. generally, i find the raised in the west or studied extensively in the west Thais to be more or less interchangeable with Westerners. t

Nope. That is a huge assumption and it is wrong.

not in NY- it is the most multicultural city in the world

Toronto is the most multi-cultural city in the world there Yank.

Look, Canuk, I can understand your defensiveness when it comes to New York, but Toronto lags behind said City by a couple of centuries, and even then our immigration influx was already more diversified in scale and scope than yours, even with your big influx of Asians/Pacific Islanders in the 1980s. So, yes, Toronto is ONE of the most multi-cultural cities in the world, but not more so than New York.

[mahtin]

Off-topic, inflammatory posts have been deleted. Further such posts will result in action. I hope THIS warning is clear enough this time.

Bring back the catapult!

Or do the cats have 9 tails?

[Kerryd]

Im surprised she didnt uppercut you pretending to be me.

Nah, she realised her mistake pretty quick because:

Being me is no easy task, just think of everything opposite to you

You must be tall, fat, broke, cross-eyed with long greasy hair, bad teeth, bad posture, bad breath, bad habits and jobless.

Sheesh, no wonder the women fall all over you !

[bangsaenguy]

hi Heng, how many farang do you know who have a very attractive and very well educated (in your eyes) Thai wife who they met in Thailand?

I know one. Actually, come to think of it, I know a couple. Not hi-so by Bangkok standards but university educated and come from well-to-do landowning families on the island I live on.

I certainly know one, me. While relationships between well educated Thai ladies and foreigners were not prevalant 10 years ago, it is very acceptable in middle and upper class families now.

[steveromagnino]

hi Heng, how many farang do you know who have a very attractive and very well educated (in your eyes) Thai wife who they met in Thailand?

I know one. Actually, come to think of it, I know a couple. Not hi-so by Bangkok standards but university educated and come from well-to-do landowning families on the island I live on.

I certainly know one, me. While relationships between well educated Thai ladies and foreigners were not prevalant 10 years ago, it is very acceptable in middle and upper class families now.

I know of at least 50-100 at a guess. Not sure about where they met, but there are at least that many within the circles I mix and they seem for the most part to be 'power couple' types.

But in my job, i know a lot of people.

As for the typical farang who says my wife is Thai Chinese educated etc....the group I am talking about are

- minor royalty

- pHD/master level from decent universities

- CEOs/MDs/HODs

- youngest daughters with no brains and the ability to do whatever they want with parent's blessing (these are the ones with usually very short shelf lifes)

and they marry into similar status people.

I don't count the entertainment brainless tramps and manwhores who marry into wealth (and there are a few).

[NoSpeakIt]

Wow steveoro you should take heng to some cocktail parties or something since he is obviously not apart of the 'in crowd' like you, knowing only 6 farang married to attractive/educated (hotel management doesn't count, srry guys) Thai's. maybe he can trade you tennis lessons.

[qwertz]

What you can't give a woman is self respect.

If she lost it before you met her, better shop elsewhere.

[kat]

Jing jing. Well posted.

[Heng]

Wow steveoro you should take heng to some cocktail parties or something since he is obviously not apart of the 'in crowd' like you, knowing only 6 farang married to attractive/educated (hotel management doesn't count, srry guys) Thai's. maybe he can trade you tennis lessons.

[cynthialee]

Do the farang and hiso good looking girl wedded couple ever go out in public.

I havent seen one yet! in over 5 years.

[Heng]

Of course they do, and they aren't difficult to pick out, it's just that they are vastly outnumbered by the stereotypical foreigner-local relationship type.

[Payboy]

You should hear what the ladies say about my buns also.

let me guess.......ummm...dont give up that baking job at rotiboy?

[NoSpeakIt]

steve,

"can he be trusted"

is this really a concern for upper class thai girls? i thought they just accepted that their bf's/husbands would cheat on them or do you mean 'trust' in a different way than fidelity?

well it is true that many Thai women are equally concerned about their Thai husbands (and believe me there are a ton of Thai couples nowadays where any infidelity on either side would be completely unacceptable). Only some farangs actually beleive that there are ton of upper class women willing to turn a blind eye to their husband's indescretions (or wifes) - check out Rika Dila or the host of public spats about cheating and infedelity - times have changed.

However, the reputation of some western men with some women is that

-some think they will not only be unfaithful, but they will do it in a way that is far less discrete (i.e. they don't know 'how' to do it so nobody knows anything)

-some think they are as wandering as Thai men or worse, especially if in a position of power

-some may base their opinion having seen well known womanising examples e.g. the California Wow guy, the guy that married into royalty, the Loreal guy, the now deceased so called 'James Bond', etc

Also with regards to lack of trust beyond just infidelity, the various examples of being cheated etc are well known e.g. the guy who got involved with Pui Porntip, etc and certainly dwarfed by the cheats and rogues of Thai ethnicity; however the alarm bells might go off for some on the basis that the warning and detection systems don't work with a foreign culture in all respects.

As for how legendary I am, obviously my original posts were extremely tongue in cheek and went right over the heads of many; maybe I am not nearly as good with the keyboard as I thought.

thanks for the response. i think to some extent many farang perfer a relationship with a simpler girl, and a dont mean simpler in a negative way. i mean it in a more Eastern, laid back, vacaction life style sort of way. Marrying a doctor requires something from you. The bar is higher. Expectations are higher. If you you pick someone way below you (financially atleast) then all you have to do is tread water. Plus, lets face it, many married farang are going through the same sideline as the married Thais, although they are probably still getting sloppy seconds (I am sure they have some scheme worked out to insure that - lol).

and i know you are fluent in Thai, you are Thai in your heart, you have many Thai friends who are like your brothers, you give your life to the King but despite all of that, you arent Thai, and your deciding to live here is in itself sort of a statement of "I don't want to be bothered," yeah yeah yeah you were born in the wrong country, its expensive and competitive over there, the girls have options, its a living hel_l - your being in Thailand, outside of your home country, for many, is a statement of unreliability and indifference - again, not that these are nessecary bad things. Of course if you have enough money you can do almost anything you want (Thank God).

[bkkjames]

Do the farang and hiso good looking girl wedded couple ever go out in public.

I havent seen one yet! in over 5 years.

I go out quite often with mine, usually to restaurants, movies, shopping malls, You might even catch us in Foodland, Villa, Tops from time to time.

But then again Cynthia Lee, perhaps we don't hang out in the places you do, whereever that is.

[NoSpeakIt]

Anyway in all seriousness though. I think the OP has some self worth issues. The fact of the matter is that every guy has something too offer. And a woman will choose him based on that. Yes some whores choose farang men out of desperation or for money, like quite possibly the OP's lady. And some attractive well bred women from good families will marry farang men because they love them. I think the OP's exposure is a bit limited

wow, did i hit too close to home? must have for you to tell me out of the blue that my gf (whom you know nothing about whatsoever) is a whore.

In a way, yes it did. I messed around with ALOT of whores in Pattaya before I decided I had enough and left that life style behind. I'm not knocking it at all I'm just saying ya don't mix the two (ie don't try and be serious with a hoe), thats when problems occur. Anyway, was I incorrect? Did your GF ever sell sex for money? If not then I will apologize. Just sounded kinda whorish by the way you portaged her stereotypical thought pattern.

im not sure what you are refering to exactly. i only remember saying that i think she sometimes resents having a foreign bf. i think this is natural. there are negative consequences to having a farang boyfriend:

1. he doesnt understand everything about your culture

2. sometimes you share a joke with him in english but it doesnt have the same effect as it does in Thai

3. sometimes people give you bad looks (sorry, but guess what, she's getting them.)

then of course there are many positive things. if she could do a harry potter spell and turn me Thai (while of course keeping my beautiful eye lashs, long nose, strong jaw, milky white skin, and six pack abs) I am sure she would do it.

i just think farang are kidding themselves if they think "all Thai girls want me but their parent's just won't let them". truth is, despite the I'm fluent in Thai. I've worked here twenty nine years. I fought in WWII. Rhetoric, most farang are very far off from landing a model slash dentist.

[bkkjames]

Anyway in all seriousness though. I think the OP has some self worth issues. The fact of the matter is that every guy has something too offer. And a woman will choose him based on that. Yes some whores choose farang men out of desperation or for money, like quite possibly the OP's lady. And some attractive well bred women from good families will marry farang men because they love them. I think the OP's exposure is a bit limited

wow, did i hit too close to home? must have for you to tell me out of the blue that my gf (whom you know nothing about whatsoever) is a whore.

In a way, yes it did. I messed around with ALOT of whores in Pattaya before I decided I had enough and left that life style behind. I'm not knocking it at all I'm just saying ya don't mix the two (ie don't try and be serious with a hoe), thats when problems occur. Anyway, was I incorrect? Did your GF ever sell sex for money? If not then I will apologize. Just sounded kinda whorish by the way you portaged her stereotypical thought pattern.

im not sure what you are refering to exactly. i only remember saying that i think she sometimes resents having a foreign bf. i think this is natural. there are negative consequences to having a farang boyfriend:

1. he doesnt understand everything about your culture

2. sometimes you share a joke with him in english but it doesnt have the same effect as it does in Thai

3. sometimes people give you bad looks (sorry, but guess what, she's getting them.)

then of course there are many positive things. if she could do a harry potter spell and turn me Thai (while of course keeping my beautiful eye lashs, long nose, strong jaw, milky white skin, and six pack abs) I am sure she would do it.

i just think farang are kidding themselves if they think "all Thai girls want me but their parent's just won't let them". truth is, despite the I'm fluent in Thai. I've worked here twenty nine years. I fought in WWII. Rhetoric, most farang are very far off from landing a model slash dentist.

Just to add a little perspective if I may. In my office we have the following.

1) Me married to my mrs who works in an office in Bangkok

2) A Thai lady that regularly dates farang guys - never Thais

3) A Thai lady engaged to a Malaysian

4) A Thai lady dating a Japanese guy for 2 years now.

and about 5 others who wish there were doing the same. None are dating Thai guys from what I can tell.

With the exception of me, all of the above come were uni educated at Tam, Chula, Mahidon etc and come from Bangkok.

So much for the myth that educated Thai girls only go out with / date / marry Thai guys.

[NoSpeakIt]

^ there was a cheerleader at my hs named Cindy. She was very cute. Then one day she slept with the School's quarterback. After that got out, for whatever reason, probably bioligical, she made her way through the rest of the football team, the basketball team, the baseball team, even the swim team.

I am very skeptical of Thai girls who are serial farang daters. All the others wished they were doing the same? Why is that exactly? Malays, Japanese, Farang are all better than Thais, huh? Thai men no good same same you. Right?

Edited July 7, 2008 by NoSpeakIt

[cynthialee]

did you mean biblical resaons sospeak.

bkkjames, it would help if you gave the ages of the thai wimmin and their foreign boyfriends. id be surprised if these middle class wimmin had bfs of social security age. 60 plus if u not from usa.

i think the line is the middle class and higher bkk chicks dont go for the kind of husbands the issarn girls go for.

Edited July 7, 2008 by cynthialee

[bkkjames]

^ there was a cheerleader at my hs named Cindy. She was very cute. Then one day she slept with the School's quarterback. After that got out, for whatever reason, probably bioligical, she made her way through the rest of the football team, the basketball team, the baseball team, even the swim team.

I am very skeptical of Thai girls who are serial farang daters. All the others wished they were doing the same? Why is that exactly? Malays, Japanese, Farang are all better than Thais, huh? Thai men no good same same you. Right?

Well this strays a bit into another TV general topic, but in a point yes. You see, while it may be cool for a Thai guy to be a butterfly in the eyes of his peers, the gals (in my office) were obviously fed up with this behavior or have no time / patience in dealing with that kind of general 20-30 year old Thai male machismo. You ever wonder why there are so many single Thai females in Bangkok? Surely it can't be from shortage of Thai males?

BTW, I hope it is clear to you that of the examples i wrote about, 3/4 are in serious long term relationships with someone other than a Thai guy. The other one dates (non Thais).

The other five I believe wish they had a serious relationship of some form.

[bonobo]

Do the farang and hiso good looking girl wedded couple ever go out in public.

I havent seen one yet! in over 5 years.

There were a fair number of Thai students who either were studying for their masters or doctorates at the same school while I was earning my doctorate. I somehow got attached to this group, and that is what brought me to Thailand the second time around (the first time was with my Marine Corps service.)

Anyway, because of that, I am friendly with a fairly large number of hiso Thais, from my three best friends (middlin' level hiso) to some fairly close friends who are in the stratosphere of hiso-dom. As a result, I have gone to many large hiso functions such as weddings, funerals, company functions political functions, etc.

While within my own little group, I am the only farang, in these larger gatherings, I see plenty of Thai-farang couples, with Thai-female/fargang-male couples being about even in numbers with Thai-male/farang-female couples. Regardless of the mix, all seem to be fairly normal couples, at least in this kind of social setting.

[steveromagnino]

and i know you are fluent in Thai, you are Thai in your heart, you have many Thai friends who are like your brothers, you give your life to the King but despite all of that, you arent Thai, and your deciding to live here is in itself sort of a statement of "I don't want to be bothered," yeah yeah yeah you were born in the wrong country, its expensive and competitive over there, the girls have options, its a living hel_l - your being in Thailand, outside of your home country, for many, is a statement of unreliability and indifference - again, not that these are nessecary bad things. Of course if you have enough money you can do almost anything you want (Thank God).

I'm 1/2 Thai; yes born abroad but what do you want me to do about that?!!

I live here because there are far more opportunities than the country I was born in (New Zealand); I would consider living and working in USA, Singapore or Japan - but I don't have a USP for those markets, I do here.

Incidentally, I earn local wages, but something like 1.5X (comparing post tax) more than what i would earn doing a similar main job in NZ PLUS there is a bonus structure and I can also run a business on the side; well 2 actually; one of which is based on using NZ knowhow and intellectual property combined with Thai craftsmanship in an industry where it would be simply impossible to build in NZ (marine industry, specialist product).

My brother given the same choices works here 2 months a year, and is emmigrating to USA with his fiance.(who is an American).

I have no idea why 'i don't want to be bothered'??? Quite the reverse! A lot easier to sit around in NZ smoking pot with my sailing and snowboarding mates then hammering the Lion Rouge!

Sorry, very confused with what you are trying to say here!

[cynthialee]

i must be blind.

i rarely see white women on thai boy anywhere!

[bkkjames]

i must be blind.

i rarely see white women on thai boy anywhere!

Somehow I am not surprised.