Where Can I Find A Private Investigator?

[indiefan]

Hey all, this is kind of sad, and I've never considered it before, but I want to find out if someone I'm seeing is lying to me about who they are. I have no idea how much it costs (I'm not made of money at all), but maybe hiring a PI to check it out is a good idea if the price is reasonable. So does anyone know a PI who speaks good english and does good work for Farangs? Maybe its a bad idea? Any advice is much appriciated.

[TopDogger]

What do you need to find out exactly?

[chiangmaibruce]

There was a guy who used to be an active poster in the Bangkok Tonight Forum who was a private detective. He used to say that most (I can't remember the %age) of the girls he checked out were lying. Though I guess if you were selling this service you would say that. Plus I think the guy who runs the stickmanbangkok web site also does this type of work. I can't put links here but you will find these via google or similar.

I only know one real life tale of someone using one in Thailand:

A friend of mine went to huge expense to check out a girl he liked, this process running over many weeks (months?). This even included having a good looking farang guy approach her at work and ask her out, etc. I am not sure who he used and would not raise the topic with him now.

Anyway the lady in question passed all the tests, and he then went through all the process to get her a visa to visit/stay in his country (all at his expense of course) - and it was a disaster. Her only interests were her nails and hair and she frequently threw childish tantrums over the smallest matters. She didn't want to study or do a part-time job (two were offered to her). She didnt want to see a counsellor about anger management. His friends told him it would never work - it didn't. He finally asked her to return to Thailand and try to sort herself out. Within weeks he found out she was with another guy and they finally broke off completely. I gather he is now so embittered by the experience he has switched his focus to the Philippines.

The message here? Well obviously the PI process didn't change the inevitable outcome. He probably should have put more weight on these other traits while he was with her in Thailand (there were certainly adequate warning signs). Also consider the implications of what happens if the lady ever finds out about this process, and what will happen then. Good luck with whatever happens.

[Jimmy in Bangkok]

Sorry to hear you're having dramas indiefan. I remember reading somewhere that if you think you need a private investigator then you probably already know the outcome and this will just confirm it. Not my words but after thinking about it I thought they were probably quite accurate as we generally have a reasonably good idea something isn't right. I don't know of anyone here personally but I would imagine a bit of Googling would get you a fairly long list. I hope it turns out to be you worrying over nothing.

Cheers

Jimmy

[indiefan]

Yep, I think you're a bit right there. ;0

Previously I met a girl who I liked a bunch. With her I was much more sure of the possibility she was lying. She was and I found out, she was a prostitute and lied about everything, so for this girl, I think we should give her a little benefit of the doubt because I'm fully aware that I'm paranoid from the previous experience. I'm much less sure of my suspicions then before, but can't deny that they are there. So you know, while I'm on the brink of actually really caring about this girl, I think its wise to find out if everything she says adds up now before I'm vested instead of later when bad news will break my heart. Know what I mean? Any advice peoples? Maybe I should purchase a fedora, dark glasses and a trench coat and try to find out where she hangs out when not with me.

Sorry to hear you're having dramas indiefan. I remember reading somewhere that if you think you need a private investigator then you probably already know the outcome and this will just confirm it. Not my words but after thinking about it I thought they were probably quite accurate as we generally have a reasonably good idea something isn't right. I don't know of anyone here personally but I would imagine a bit of Googling would get you a fairly long list. I hope it turns out to be you worrying over nothing.

Cheers

Jimmy

[jietjon]

Yep, I think you're a bit right there. ;0

Previously I met a girl who I liked a bunch. With her I was much more sure of the possibility she was lying. She was and I found out, she was a prostitute and lied about everything, so for this girl, I think we should give her a little benefit of the doubt because I'm fully aware that I'm paranoid from the previous experience. I'm much less sure of my suspicions then before, but can't deny that they are there. So you know, while I'm on the brink of actually really caring about this girl, I think its wise to find out if everything she says adds up now before I'm vested instead of later when bad news will break my heart. Know what I mean? Any advice peoples? Maybe I should purchase a fedora, dark glasses and a trench coat and try to find out where she hangs out when not with me.

Sorry to hear you're having dramas indiefan. I remember reading somewhere that if you think you need a private investigator then you probably already know the outcome and this will just confirm it. Not my words but after thinking about it I thought they were probably quite accurate as we generally have a reasonably good idea something isn't right. I don't know of anyone here personally but I would imagine a bit of Googling would get you a fairly long list. I hope it turns out to be you worrying over nothing.

Cheers

Jimmy

That is a difficult one dude, if you have an idea theres something wrong you either break it off , find another. Or take whatever happens on the chin, if you really like her. Its a sore one, i have been there before.Hope all works out mukka.

[chiang mai]

Every time I see one of these or try to do the good samaritan trick and help to check the person out myself, the answer is always the same. Save your self the grief and walk away from the problem, if you think there's an issue that makes you want to take these steps you are almost certainly correct.

[Jimmy in Bangkok]

Yeah you do have a bit of a tough one indeed. I can imagine it is difficult to be sure that you are suspicious due to her actions or simply being paranoid from past experiences. If you know you're slightly paranoid then you are at an advantage. I still find though that if you get that "gut" feeling that something isn't right then you're generally fairly spot on. It's not infallible of course. If you have any doubts then I would certainly agree that you need to either have them confirmed or put them to rest, one or the other. How you would go about this is another matter entirely though. I don't think following her around is a terribly smart move as how would she react if she caught you out? Put yourself in her shoes and think how you would feel if she was following you around and you caught her out. I would recommend being extremely discreet no matter what method you decide to use. Sorry I can't be of more help. I have been where you are now, previously myself, and it can be very a stressful situation.

Cheers

Jimmy

Yep, I think you're a bit right there. ;0

Previously I met a girl who I liked a bunch. With her I was much more sure of the possibility she was lying. She was and I found out, she was a prostitute and lied about everything, so for this girl, I think we should give her a little benefit of the doubt because I'm fully aware that I'm paranoid from the previous experience. I'm much less sure of my suspicions then before, but can't deny that they are there. So you know, while I'm on the brink of actually really caring about this girl, I think its wise to find out if everything she says adds up now before I'm vested instead of later when bad news will break my heart. Know what I mean? Any advice peoples? Maybe I should purchase a fedora, dark glasses and a trench coat and try to find out where she hangs out when not with me.

Sorry to hear you're having dramas indiefan. I remember reading somewhere that if you think you need a private investigator then you probably already know the outcome and this will just confirm it. Not my words but after thinking about it I thought they were probably quite accurate as we generally have a reasonably good idea something isn't right. I don't know of anyone here personally but I would imagine a bit of Googling would get you a fairly long list. I hope it turns out to be you worrying over nothing.

Cheers

Jimmy

[RakJungTorlae]

Yep, I think you're a bit right there. ;0

Previously I met a girl who I liked a bunch. With her I was much more sure of the possibility she was lying. She was and I found out, she was a prostitute and lied about everything, so for this girl, I think we should give her a little benefit of the doubt because I'm fully aware that I'm paranoid from the previous experience. I'm much less sure of my suspicions then before, but can't deny that they are there. So you know, while I'm on the brink of actually really caring about this girl, I think its wise to find out if everything she says adds up now before I'm vested instead of later when bad news will break my heart. Know what I mean? Any advice peoples? Maybe I should purchase a fedora, dark glasses and a trench coat and try to find out where she hangs out when not with me.

The word "paranoid" come to mind.

Edit: you seed it already, at least you know.

Edited July 19, 2008 by RakJungTorlae

[RakJungTorlae]

Yep, I think you're a bit right there. ;0

Previously I met a girl who I liked a bunch. With her I was much more sure of the possibility she was lying. She was and I found out, she was a prostitute and lied about everything, so for this girl, I think we should give her a little benefit of the doubt because I'm fully aware that I'm paranoid from the previous experience. I'm much less sure of my suspicions then before, but can't deny that they are there. So you know, while I'm on the brink of actually really caring about this girl, I think its wise to find out if everything she says adds up now before I'm vested instead of later when bad news will break my heart. Know what I mean? Any advice peoples? Maybe I should purchase a fedora, dark glasses and a trench coat and try to find out where she hangs out when not with me.

Well what if there was nothing there? Then will you feel happy with your self then? It is not good grounds to continue the relationship.

[bendix]

Given the dubious nature of the people involved in private investigation in Thailand (cf the guy just arrested for human trafficking), I wouldn't trust any of those buggers either. It's akin to sending pimps to spy on hookers.

Edited July 19, 2008 by bendix

[britmaveric]

http://www.stickmanweekly.com/StickMarkII/...pDoesntWork.htm

Try reading this train wreck of a posting on Stick. (this should make you feel better)

[malcolminthemiddle]

If you haven't already, try meeting the family (M & D).

I'm not saying this will tell you everything but may well ease your suspicions.

If the parents are good people then chances are the daughter is to.

[britmaveric]

Requesting drainage of bank account is tell tale sign.

[uptou]

I would say that if youve been seing her for some time & feel that you still dont know her,or are suspicious that she lies to you,then shes not even a freind,& maybe its best not to commit.

[mikethevigoman]

There is an easier way, tell her you are about to declare bankrupcy, ask if she will stay with you for nothing and even if she woulld help you out financially, dont laugh, a woman from anywhere if in love would help,.this statement will cause a few hiccups but i know my (thai ) wife would, why would any woman that loves you not help,.

[tattoodrob]

first i would check her phone with her permission ofcourse,if she is doing nothing wrong then why should she not show all numbers and sms,also her email adress and see whats been going on there.if shes seeing someone else then she must have contact somehow...has she got another phone in her room,does she disappear to take phone calls sometimes.check her bank account and deposits made...if no recent transactions then maybe ok.also if she stays with you 24-7 for a bit then you would see if she is up to something as would need contact somehow or other guy would be angry!!

if you still need help and in pattaya area then pm me to put you in contact with someone who can help.

[terrier123]

Some good replies to the same old story told with a slightly different slant. The best advice (as the one from Chiang Mai) WALK AWAY. It will save you a lot of money AND heartbreak when the inevitable happens. Some of us older ones get caught more than once but now there are forums/stories like this we should ALL be more careful. Since my most recent loss I have been more aware and find I have quite a bit more money left at the end of each month and still having as much fun.

Even in the Provincial towns 500 miles from BKK and even further from Pattaya etc., it is easy to lose EVERYTHING. Our kindly smiling hosts are taught from an early age to bleed every emotion and penny from us fellahs who are looking for a relaxed, happy and better life -- the same as they are. But these are greedy types and sometimes the cost is just too high.

Good 'uns are extremely hard to find and even then they will still find some way to punish you after years "taking care". It would be better for all if we thought a little more about the ridiculous things such as sin sot and refused to keep paying. I agree that a reasonable monthly amount is far better for everyone. Some amongst us are wealthy but a lot live on pensions and are not millionaires as the locals think. As they say, there are thousands of pebbles left on these here beaches.

AFTER ALL'S SAID AND DONE LIFE HERE IS STILL FAR BETTER THAN IN THE WEST.

[jietjon]

Some good replies to the same old story told with a slightly different slant. The best advice (as the one from Chiang Mai) WALK AWAY. It will save you a lot of money AND heartbreak when the inevitable happens. Some of us older ones get caught more than once but now there are forums/stories like this we should ALL be more careful. Since my most recent loss I have been more aware and find I have quite a bit more money left at the end of each month and still having as much fun.

Even in the Provincial towns 500 miles from BKK and even further from Pattaya etc., it is easy to lose EVERYTHING. Our kindly smiling hosts are taught from an early age to bleed every emotion and penny from us fellahs who are looking for a relaxed, happy and better life -- the same as they are. But these are greedy types and sometimes the cost is just too high.

Good 'uns are extremely hard to find and even then they will still find some way to punish you after years "taking care". It would be better for all if we thought a little more about the ridiculous things such as sin sot and refused to keep paying. I agree that a reasonable monthly amount is far better for everyone. Some amongst us are wealthy but a lot live on pensions and are not millionaires as the locals think. As they say, there are thousands of pebbles left on these here beaches.

AFTER ALL'S SAID AND DONE LIFE HERE IS STILL FAR BETTER THAN IN THE WEST.

So true. Pebbles on the beach .. thats all we are. We need to live in harmony.

[issanpaul]

http://www.stickmanweekly.com/StickMarkII/...pDoesntWork.htm

Try reading this train wreck of a posting on Stick. (this should make you feel better)

My God !!!!!!! You Will Give O.P. A Nervous Breakdown

[farang555]

where did u meet this lady? at church? supermarket? place where hookers hang out?

Edited July 20, 2008 by farang555

[grantbkk]

As mentioned on this thread, the mobile phone is your ticket to knowledge. These poor saps who are working outside of Thailand have the same instincts as the OP. Any number of clients have to keep in almost constant contact with the "girlfriend" to allay their fears of being cheated on. These girls are cunning and may clear their text messages and call logs from time to time but once they get a little comfortable they will become a bit lazy and leave you some good reading and possibly some juicy photographs. Dude! It's a business. The most number of mobile phones I've seen one girl carry is four. Yes, each one was purchased by a visiting client. She may think it's cool to be so popular and get a little compatriot status but after she discovers that all these phone calls are a lot like work it begins to take a toll. Eventually she will let the calls of the less generous clients go to voice mail and revert to the Prostitution 101 list of standard lies when out of contact.

The OP can do the PI thing but it cost money and may be a waste of time. Put a little effort in and you will achieve results on your own and possible feel a sense of accomplishment. If the girl has a Thai boyfriend you may be introduced to her "brother". Somewhat of a red flag when that happens. On the plus side, if the girl has given him any of your money he will send photos of himself from time to time to raise his self esteem regarding the girlfriend he allows to work the foreigners.

Good luck.

[meom]

I still find though that if you get that "gut" feeling that something isn't right then you're generally fairly spot on. It's not infallible of course.

I play the lottery with my gut feeling. Never been right up to now

[Jimmy in Bangkok]

I still find though that if you get that "gut" feeling that something isn't right then you're generally fairly spot on. It's not infallible of course.

I play the lottery with my gut feeling. Never been right up to now

Well meom,

I must admit I haven't either but I have had a bit more success with affairs of the heart and that feeling Enough that I listen to it now anyway.

[Jimmy in Bangkok]

http://www.stickmanweekly.com/StickMarkII/...pDoesntWork.htm

Try reading this train wreck of a posting on Stick. (this should make you feel better)

Yeah that is indeed ugly. I can't understand why, after all that, the guy was still interested in her?

Cheers

Jimmy

[bendix]

In turn, I can't believe that noone ever questions the authenticity of these stories designed to put fear in foreigners' minds - thus encouraging the use of a PI - when they are in fact published on a Private Investigator's website . . .

[Jimjim]

A good one I found before is thailandpi.com. Well, I can't say it's good but it looks good.

[bendix]

A good one I found before is thailandpi.com. Well, I can't say it's good but it looks good.

Isnt this is the outfit run by the guy (ex copper from Merseyside) who was recently arrested for allegedly trafficking in Thai woman to UK brothels? There's a thread on it somewhere.

Are you sure you want to recommend such upstanding characters? As I said before, it's like hiring pimps to spy on hookers.

As an aside it's interesting to note that even this fine organisation draws the line at 'uplifting' and passing on private email passwords, something which stickman (in his article mentioned above) proudly claims to have done.

Edited July 20, 2008 by bendix

[RakJungTorlae]

I read thou a few of those stories and they do have some truth to them, although it's a sneaky way to send fear in to people, I find it funny when I see it happen, Such as chat partners, its very common. Internet gig collecting sponsors hahah.

In tune, What I can never understand is the hearts of some men, for example the O.P he says he cares for this girl, well he's going against he's beliefs if wants to spy on her. If care give her freedom and space to make her own mistakes. Maybe you are giving her money, but dose she belong to you? You should know in Thailand sometimes cool comes before heart. So do you care for her or just care your self?

And its simple too, if you feel your partner is messing around and no proof ..who you gonna call?? No one just go and do the same thing.. fun fun…

I don't wish to get in to the whole insecure lecher again..

Edited July 20, 2008 by RakJungTorlae

[LtCol]

I am a consultant Detective & work on contract all over the place for Govt. Agencies & Media corporations. I'm about to move to Pattaya as soon as we have sold our main property here in Perth to retire.

I am an Interview/Interrogation Teacher to Govts. in Voice Analysis including the Royal Malaysia Police,Singapore Police etc.

My family own the Forensic Voice Analyzer Copyright & we have even demonstrated it for the DSI in Bangkok. Check www.itvt.org

My advice , (as we do conduct Tests for private people), if you think you need a PI . then don't proceed any further !

That's 39 + years experience talking. But, at the end of the day I usually find emotion overcomes common sense. Good Luck.