Aussie Housewife

[LennyW]

Aussie Housewife

>

>

> Sheila, the Aussie housewife, got out of the shower and slipped on the

> bathroom floor. Instead of falling over forwards or backwards, she did

> the splits and suctioned-cupped herself to the floor.

>

> She yelled out for her husband, "Bruce! Bruce!"

> Bruce came running in.

>

> "Bruce, I've bloody suctioned myself to the floor," she said.

> "S'truth," Bruce said, and tried to pull her up. "You're stuck fast

> girl! I'll go across the road and get me mate."

> They came back and they both tried to pull her up.

> "No way, we can't do it," Cobber said, "so let's try Plan B."

>

> "Plan B," exclaimed Bruce, "what's that?"

> "I'll go home and get my hammer and chisel and we'll break the tiles

> under her," replied Cobber.

> "Spot on," Bruce said, "while you're doing that, I'll stay here and

> play with her nipples."

>

> "Play with her nipples?," Cobber said, "Not exactly a good time for

> that mate!"......

.....

> "No," Bruce replied, "but I reckon if I can get her wet enough, we can

> slide her into the kitchen where the tiles are less expensive"