How Does It Feel...

[naomisri]

Interested in Farang/Thai perspectives about being a woman in Thailand today. Are the times a-changing or are things just like they used to be? Is Thailand going to go down the same path as the West? What is holding it back? How do you feel being surrounded by people who still believe men and women aren't equal? Is it even an issue?

I personally enjoy having a career, but equally enjoy being based at home. What I don't enjoy is feeling that there is a limit to what I can and can't do. My husband is happy for me to go out and chop logs, do the washing or take care of the accounts, I'm lucky, but we get some pretty funny vibes from some men and women, both Thai and farang about it.

[shopgurl]

Honestly, I don't really feel any unfair or mistreatment due to my gender unless being counted out from a business dinner due to the choice of venue i.e. pc way of putting it..men spas-which I don't mind at all.

Seriously...from personal experience, I think the major companies in Bangkok practice respectful professionalism, hiring on basis beyond gender. They look more into your competency and credentials before anything else but maybe I have been lucky to have encountered such.

Being Thai/Chinese/American woman, I don't think there's anything or anyone that is holding me back...well except maybe myself. I firmly believe that you are treated on how you treat others. Of course you're always going to run into people that try to demoralize you but that isn't really restricted to gender, people are always going to question why some are lucky than others. The matter of equality then becomes more of an acrimonious label in which people put in front of themselves in fear of trying to attain what they want.

Thailand going towards the same path as the west? I hope not, if we're talking about infrastructure and overall well-being for our citizens then of course but if we're talking about cold, harsh, or disrespectful business practices, definite no. I still love the gregarious ways of doing business here although I admit that it can be painstaking at times but it builds character, you might say...

Not sure if that answered your question Naomisri?

[naomisri]

Honestly, I don't really feel any unfair or mistreatment due to my gender unless being counted out from a business dinner due to the choice of venue i.e. pc way of putting it..men spas-which I don't mind at all. 

Seriously...from personal experience, I think the major companies in Bangkok practice respectful professionalism, hiring on basis beyond gender.  They look more into your competency and credentials before anything else but maybe I have been lucky to have encountered such.

Being Thai/Chinese/American woman, I don't think there's anything or anyone that is holding me back...well except maybe myself.  I firmly believe that you are treated on how you treat others.  Of course you're always going to run into people that try to demoralize you but that isn't really restricted to gender, people are always going to question why some are lucky than others.  The matter of equality then becomes more of an acrimonious label in which people put in front of themselves in fear of trying to attain what they want.

Thailand going towards the same path as the west?  I hope not, if we're talking about infrastructure and overall well-being for our citizens then of course but if we're talking about cold, harsh, or disrespectful business practices, definite no.  I still love the gregarious ways of doing business here although I admit that it can be painstaking at times but it builds character, you might say...

Not sure if that answered your question Naomisri?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Well there were loads of questions really and I'm happy that you interpreted them in the way that you did - shows what you personally care about. I am very reassured in lots of ways by your description of the major companies in BKK. I had a friend who was Thai, but had lived most of her life in Australia. She noticed huge differences when working in a Thai University to back in Australia. She felt very much part of a heirarchy and was intimidated by her superior (a higher ranking professor) and other male members of staff who used sexist/sexual language and behaved badly treating her like a servant-which is inexcusable under any circumstances. But this is only one example.

Coming from the UK I still experienced in one company promotions offered to men above women and a boys club atmosphere, but this was an exception. I didn't feel much holding me back from being successful - as you say sometimes it is more about the barriers of the person rather than the group that person belongs to.

I haven't had a career in Thailand, but was wondering what the differences were between the two countries. I know that of some of the people that I have met here there seems to be less fluidity of roles than in the UK. That's a generalisation of course, but for example there are men who wouldn't dream of washing a dish or a shirt. I'm not saying that's wrong, or that there aren't men like that in the UK, personally if I didn't ever have to wash a dish again I wouldn't! I do know a lot of women who take care of their kids, clean, cook and work the same hours as their husband. It isn't in the Thai nature to complain though and I think we could learn a lot from that. Doing instead of talking is something I love about the Thai culture and people.

[sbk]

Not being in a professional situation, or in an urban area I couldn't really tell you much about how women like that are treated. Although I have noticed that the ads requiring a young, attractive female receptionist ages 20-30 have disappeared from the Bangkok post help wanted ads!

Here in a more rural area alot of it seems to depend on the person, how they were raised, how their parents behaved. My husband's father does not treat his wife like his personal servant, he does his own laundry and will help with the cooking. On the other hand, my brother-in-law, who grew up with his grandparents, treats his wife like a slave and requires her to do almost everything for him (even clip his toenails!!!). I am guessing he got this attitude from his grandfather as neither of his brothers are like this and his sister takes no sh!t from anyone, much less a man.

My mother-in-law and father-in-law do not distinguish between 'mens work' and 'womens work' as there is just work that needs to be done. He helps with the dishes and she helps with the coconuts. I would say this attitude is pretty predominant amongst older people here who had to work hard in order to eat. Wealthier town people are different. Younger people who have had it easier can be different (there seems to be a gn age group between the older people in their 60s and the younger ones in their 20's and 30's who feel that division of labor by sex is ok, mostly around my brother-in-law's age; 40's).