Micro Businesses For Your Unskilled Partners

[Jingthing]

I notice a lot of us pair up with unskilled young men. Well, then what?

Presumably, if they were "in the life" you don't want them to do that anymore. Or they could stay home all day and watch soap operas, sounds to me a recipe for boredom and breakup. Or they could get a basic job at Tesco or someplace like that but then they are gone too much of the time for a tiny bit of money. So what about micro-businesses? What small businesses have people started for their partners, what were the costs involved, and what were the results?

[Ijustwannateach]

Personally, I think the slight trouble of finding someone a bit more educated and gainfully employed (and yes, possibly slightly older) outweighs the combined effort of taking a damaged unemployed or unemployable young man off the streets (literally or figuratively) and somehow believing that he can make a business work. Heck, I somewhat doubt (given my lack of experience) my OWN ability to make a small business work.

And furthermore, I'd suggest that if you're hoping to get him into a life of work, experience at the bottom is necessary, too- if nothing else to show what he might face if he were really dependent on a real job (just don't let him take taxis to go to his 4000B/month table bussing job).

But if you're really intent on what you say, try to keep it simple and focus on volume, not price. Financing the opening of a noodle stand, for instance- preferably after you have required him to work at someone ELSE's relatively successful noodle stand so he understands how they should really function and what real business techniques are necessary to manage stock, service, cleanup, human resources, and security. Not to mention the social side of dealing with customers.

I'd also recommend discussing terms of repayment on your investment, so that there is some real motivation to make profit. Of course, it's entirely possible that he could eventully become "too" successful and the sponsor could be hoist by his own petard....

Good luck.

[Jingthing]

To clarify, I am not doing this, just posted this as a hypothetical, because I know there is probably a wealth of experience about this out there, and I am curious. That said, the question was not about higher class educated Thai men, it is about the unskilled ones.

[drfang]

An aquaintance of mine has bought some land for his ym. Its a project they can both share, clearing and planting with the goal of growing organic fruit and veges. The ym has a rural background and loves to farm. when my aquaintance has gone the way of all flesh, and the ym is no longer young, he will be set up for life. IMO a really good thing to do.

[Jingthing]

That's interesting and good for a farmer type.

[Ijustwannateach]

The problem with making large capital investments (such as land, buildings, livestock, farm equipment)- which are nearly always inevitably in the name of the Thai partner- is that they are easily sold. This means that if the Thai partner has a dysfunctional and/or poor and/or manipulative family- which, I'm afraid, is pretty dam_n likely in the case of people of the genre we are discussing- the moment any of them really, really "need" something- including payment for a gambling debt- the land is just another family asset. It would take a very unlikely amount of independence and very unusually strong personal boundaries on the part of the Thai partner from the genre we are discussing to resist a request of this type. Furthermore, if the type of farming that an unskilled person will be proficient at were really likely to get a person out of poverty or give them a sustainable career, it is probable they would have found sufficient employment back home. If the goal is to train the person to live in 'the real world,' this won't work without providing the person with the financial cushion that his entry into the "genre" was designed to accomplish. On the other hand, if the goal is to give the partner something to do, will he really stick with such manual, grueling labour after becoming used to the bright lights, etc. (and being paid for it)? How will his self-esteem fare when he realises that the project is just an expensive kind of make-work for him?

A noodle stand or some similar thing, on the other hand, is harder to sell, results most likely in less return when liquidised compared to the perceived benefits of selling the noodles, and is probably less expensive to get running- and more reliable as a source of income than farming, which is a gamble involving both luck and skill (and we are talking about UNSKILLED persons of this genre, as JT requested). It also has the advantage of very short-term planning- stocking, profits, reinvestment, and cooking- so that work and reward are more closely connected (which can be important to demonstrate in early stages for younger persons whose sense of work and reward have been spoiled or are unrealistic in the first place for... other reasons). It also has the advantage of being closely connected with lots of Thai people, who will help continue giving the Thai partner enjoyment at his work (if he is not antisocial).

I hope that raising these various concerns will give numerous readers at least a little wake-up call regarding the real responsibilities of making another person dependent on you, even with the best of intentions.

[Jingthing]

That was very insightful, Mr. Teach. I agree in a long term relationship where the young man is totally dependent it may seem like a dream come true to a young man, but in the long run probably sets him up for a dark future when the relationship ends.

Yes a noodle stall sounds alright and I have noticed some of them don't work all that many hours. Any other micro business ideas along those line? Maybe something a little more original?

I understand sometimes the young man is sponsored for further schooling and I think in rare cases that works out, but more commonly the background and motivation is not there.

Edited June 8, 2009 by Jingthing

[Ijustwannateach]

Original? ORIGINAL?!? I'll show you original.

It doesn't have to be a noodle stand- there are endless creative possibilities.

For example, it could be a Som Tam Stand.

[paulfromphuket]

This is quite simple, first of all find someone who has had a job and understands working for a living.

Then employ them .

My YM was a chef and hotel worker and now is my gardener, pool guy, driver and cook.

he is paid a salary and gives perks on the side. he saves me money and is my love to boot.

Perfect

[Jingthing]

Employee/lover is not everyone's idea of the perfect romance, but it does sound very practical!

Back to the topic, you say find someone already with skills and a work ethic, but that was not the question!

People fall in love (and/or lust) with all kinds of people. It is not like shopping for a new hat. Some of those people may be the "wrong" people or difficult people economically speaking. The reality is that many gay men in Thailand get involved with unskilled young men. OK, many have rice farming skills but that isn't useful in an urban setting. So what can these guys do for their futures, assuming they actually want to do something?

[paulfromphuket]

Employee/lover is not everyone's idea of the perfect romance, but it does sound very practical!

Back to the topic, you say find someone already with skills and a work ethic, but that was not the question!

People fall in love (and/or lust) with all kinds of people. It is not like shopping for a new hat. Some of those people may be the "wrong" people or difficult people economically speaking. The reality is that many gay men in Thailand get involved with unskilled young men. OK, many have rice farming skills but that isn't useful in an urban setting. So what can these guys do for their futures, assuming they actually want to do something?

lets face it, if you want a trophy bride with or without a kok it will cost you period.

If your love is employed elsewhwere, ie: a job in Thailand the chances are you will hardly ever see him, so it makes total sence to me to keep my guy in my business, he accepts that business is the day job and home is where we lay our hats.

It might not work for everyone but having had a number of relationships fail due to not been able to spend quality time together now after two years together my partner and I are still very happy.

I guess picking a partner that's a bit savy in the first place helped and I konw that it is all too easy to just go down the looker route but my advise is just keep looking>

[Jingthing]

Again, thanks for sharing, but telling people DON'T DO THAT does not address the issues of people that DO DO THAT.

Perhaps this is the wrong place to post this question. May be better on one of the slummier gay forums, apparently most gay folk here are dating Thai doctors and lawyers.

BTW, what would the typical start up costs be for a noodle stall? Don't they have to pay people to be able to stay at a fixed position on the street?

Edited June 9, 2009 by Jingthing

[Ijustwannateach]

JT, are you SURE you have no personal interest in this? :D

I have heard that a basic noodle stand setup is in the 10k+ range depending on how fancy you want to get. It is also true that locations are usually 'protected' or else legitimately rented, and that's what it's all about, right? Location, location, location. So there will be some startup costs.

[Jingthing]

JT, are you SURE you have no personal interest in this?

Not at the moment, but I can imagine that I might in the future. If you are familiar with my posting style, you will know I am not above posting purely hypothetical topics. However, I understand your suspicions, but they are wrong.

Edited June 9, 2009 by Jingthing

[Ijustwannateach]

I'm just teasing, guv'nor! <--- (that's what the smileys indicate!!!)

[paulfromphuket]

Maybe they could take up one of the many free on-line introduction to Unix courses and train to become a Unix system administrator which is very well paid and can often be performed remotely from home.

There is a lot of demand for those with C++ skills too, so much free learning online, if 13 yr olds in Mumbai can do it so can a lazy boyfriend. Not that I want to do a 13yr old in Mumbai, well not any more since that problem with the police, but I digress somewhat.

:D :D

[farangpattaya]

Maybe they could take up one of the many free on-line introduction to Unix courses and train to become a Unix system administrator which is very well paid and can often be performed remotely from home.

There is a lot of demand for those with C++ skills too, so much free learning online, if 13 yr olds in Mumbai can do it so can a lazy boyfriend. Not that I want to do a 13yr old in Mumbai, well not any more since that problem with the police, but I digress somewhat.

I met my last YM a few months ago, just before I was about to leave home for a long period of time. The YM isn't educated and is mainly controlled/supervised by his nephew aka step-brother.

The step-brother talked him into the gay-bar scene, although he isn't gay (that's not absnormal), and because of that he didn't make a lot of money.

During my stay at home my YM phoned me sometimes with bright ideas about buying land and live-stock in Udon, but I didn't agree on that.

For unknown reasons, I returned to LOS pretty quick and YM decided to move in with me, although after 2 days he decided to move in with his new girlfriend (??).

So I stayed alone which suited me perfect; I was out all day and couldn't deal with a lazy E-San boy enjoying his brains out, while I was at work.

Anyway, he came with more bright ideas: the hair-dresser school, being a motorbike taxi driver, basically everything except a proper job.

Some days ago he and his girlfriend broke up and he decided to move back in, but I wasn't very anxious about all this; basically I am fed up with the cheap, lying, cheating and senseless Thai brads.

So, this time I decided to return him to his home town, somewhat near the Mekong River some 80 kms from Nong Khai. I won't give him any money for the trip, because he won't go after getting it, but I will drive him up there myself and give him some cash if he stays.

I think that it is best for him to take care the buffalo's and the rice-fields and stay away from places like Pattaya.

Of course he agrees on my plan, and to be honest, I saw him brighten up, when I explained him my idea.

[Ijustwannateach]

"Saving them from the bars" usually doesn't work out. "Brightening at the thought of receiving money" is probably what you were observing. And you're kind to attempt it, but really- unless you yourself are going to hang out in the countryside with him- why would you bother paying a straight MB to stay in Issan where you are not even going to see him, if he wouldn't even use money you gave him to go home? If the point is NOT to see him: Just Say No.

I can basically understand why prostitution exists- but what I don't understand is how/why people come up with these weird solutions to these strange entanglements- most of the time I fear it is a basic lack of good faith about why both parties are involved together. If the relationship is financial, for Pete's sake don't look at the other person as a development project.

I would concur with the poster above who recommends finding someone already functional enough to have a job, and go a-courting. Of course, that DOES take more work and time, some social skills, and possibly a basic level of attraction.

[Jingthing]

I agree being a social worker is not something amateurs should usually attempt. However, again, the idea of this is not how to select your partner, the topic is about if you have become enamored with someone who is employable only at the bottom rungs. Now, I do hear what you are saying, in that it would be a major folly to push a productive activity on someone. If they are in heaven lounging about and watching the tube and enjoying your money and they don't express any interest in doing something about their future, well that may be typical but not universal. In such cases, it is probably best to accept you have fallen in love with a bum or kick him to the curb. So perhaps this should be rephrased to apply to young men who express an interest in doing something without being pressured into doing so. Yes, I know many will sense that is what the foreigner wants to hear and don't really mean it (and also some will use that ploy to extract large sums of money, life is risky).

Edited June 11, 2009 by Jingthing

[paulfromphuket]

I agree being a social worker is not something amateurs should usually attempt. However, again, the idea of this is not how to select your partner, the topic is about if you have become enamored with someone who is employable only at the bottom rungs. Now, I do hear what you are saying, in that it would be a major folly to push a productive activity on someone. If they are in heaven lounging about and watching the tube and enjoying your money and they don't express any interest in doing something about their future, well that may be typical but not universal. In such cases, it is probably best to accept you have fallen in love with a bum or kick him to the curb. So perhaps this should be rephrased to apply to young men who express an interest in doing something without being pressured into doing so. Yes, I know many will sense that is what the foreigner wants to hear and don't really mean it (and also some will use that ploy to extract large sums of money, life is risky).

Maybe I have been too rightious, yes love is love, and I have been there ,so they have to have some purpose in life life beyond the sack, I maintain that keeping them close to home, even if they are not a chef of hotel worker is the way to go let them out of your sight and you will regret it.

[scorecard]

I agree being a social worker is not something amateurs should usually attempt. However, again, the idea of this is not how to select your partner, the topic is about if you have become enamored with someone who is employable only at the bottom rungs. Now, I do hear what you are saying, in that it would be a major folly to push a productive activity on someone. If they are in heaven lounging about and watching the tube and enjoying your money and they don't express any interest in doing something about their future, well that may be typical but not universal. In such cases, it is probably best to accept you have fallen in love with a bum or kick him to the curb. So perhaps this should be rephrased to apply to young men who express an interest in doing something without being pressured into doing so. Yes, I know many will sense that is what the foreigner wants to hear and don't really mean it (and also some will use that ploy to extract large sums of money, life is risky).

Maybe I have been too rightious, yes love is love, and I have been there ,so they have to have some purpose in life life beyond the sack, I maintain that keeping them close to home, even if they are not a chef of hotel worker is the way to go let them out of your sight and you will regret it.

Sorry, but I think there's something fundamentally wrong with the statement "I maintain that keeping them close to home, even if they are not a chef of hotel worker is the way to go let them out of your sight and you will regret it."

Somehow this sounds like seeing the young man as your property and I don't believe this is appropriate.

You cannot force someone to love you. Seems to me there's two possible pictures:

1. He genuinely wants to stay, he shows his sincerity and he shows you clearly that he can be trusted to go out to see his friends etc., etc., and he proves that he's reliable and that he ultimately sees you as his priority.

2. He just stays for the home comforts etc., but his loyalties and desires are very much somewhere else. If this is the case, why delude yourself, why try to control him. Your just settting yourself up for pain again and again.

Controlling people is not very nice and surely will set up resentment and more, and never reap anything worthwhile long-term.

[paulfromphuket]

I agree being a social worker is not something amateurs should usually attempt. However, again, the idea of this is not how to select your partner, the topic is about if you have become enamored with someone who is employable only at the bottom rungs. Now, I do hear what you are saying, in that it would be a major folly to push a productive activity on someone. If they are in heaven lounging about and watching the tube and enjoying your money and they don't express any interest in doing something about their future, well that may be typical but not universal. In such cases, it is probably best to accept you have fallen in love with a bum or kick him to the curb. So perhaps this should be rephrased to apply to young men who express an interest in doing something without being pressured into doing so. Yes, I know many will sense that is what the foreigner wants to hear and don't really mean it (and also some will use that ploy to extract large sums of money, life is risky).

Maybe I have been too rightious, yes love is love, and I have been there ,so they have to have some purpose in life life beyond the sack, I maintain that keeping them close to home, even if they are not a chef of hotel worker is the way to go let them out of your sight and you will regret it.

Sorry, but I think there's something fundamentally wrong with the statement "I maintain that keeping them close to home, even if they are not a chef of hotel worker is the way to go let them out of your sight and you will regret it."

Somehow this sounds like seeing the young man as your property and I don't believe this is appropriate.

You cannot force someone to love you. Seems to me there's two possible pictures:

1. He genuinely wants to stay, he shows his sincerity and he shows you clearly that he can be trusted to go out to see his friends etc., etc., and he proves that he's reliable and that he ultimately sees you as his priority.

2. He just stays for the home comforts etc., but his loyalties and desires are very much somewhere else. If this is the case, why delude yourself, why try to control him. Your just settting yourself up for pain again and again.

Controlling people is not very nice and surely will set up resentment and more, and never reap anything worthwhile long-term.

i don't want to be misunderstood here.

The question was what to to with uneducated young men and can they run a micro business.

I don't control my 28 year old young man, he goes to see his friends, invites then to our home and has has much fun as he likes, he uses the car more than me, but he does not have to work hotel shifts 12 hours anymore, but he understands we are in business and takes it seriousley and is paid by the company same as I am.

we have s very happy and meaningful relationship becuase he is fully included in why I am here, I dont control him and he does not control me ( an important point) we are a team and that goes right back to my original post on this topic.

you want to save a RB try good luck.

[scorecard]

I agree being a social worker is not something amateurs should usually attempt. However, again, the idea of this is not how to select your partner, the topic is about if you have become enamored with someone who is employable only at the bottom rungs. Now, I do hear what you are saying, in that it would be a major folly to push a productive activity on someone. If they are in heaven lounging about and watching the tube and enjoying your money and they don't express any interest in doing something about their future, well that may be typical but not universal. In such cases, it is probably best to accept you have fallen in love with a bum or kick him to the curb. So perhaps this should be rephrased to apply to young men who express an interest in doing something without being pressured into doing so. Yes, I know many will sense that is what the foreigner wants to hear and don't really mean it (and also some will use that ploy to extract large sums of money, life is risky).

Maybe I have been too rightious, yes love is love, and I have been there ,so they have to have some purpose in life life beyond the sack, I maintain that keeping them close to home, even if they are not a chef of hotel worker is the way to go let them out of your sight and you will regret it.

Sorry, but I think there's something fundamentally wrong with the statement "I maintain that keeping them close to home, even if they are not a chef of hotel worker is the way to go let them out of your sight and you will regret it."

Somehow this sounds like seeing the young man as your property and I don't believe this is appropriate.

You cannot force someone to love you. Seems to me there's two possible pictures:

1. He genuinely wants to stay, he shows his sincerity and he shows you clearly that he can be trusted to go out to see his friends etc., etc., and he proves that he's reliable and that he ultimately sees you as his priority.

2. He just stays for the home comforts etc., but his loyalties and desires are very much somewhere else. If this is the case, why delude yourself, why try to control him. Your just settting yourself up for pain again and again.

Controlling people is not very nice and surely will set up resentment and more, and never reap anything worthwhile long-term.

i don't want to be misunderstood here.

The question was what to to with uneducated young men and can they run a micro business.

I don't control my 28 year old young man, he goes to see his friends, invites then to our home and has has much fun as he likes, he uses the car more than me, but he does not have to work hotel shifts 12 hours anymore, but he understands we are in business and takes it seriousley and is paid by the company same as I am.

we have s very happy and meaningful relationship becuase he is fully included in why I am here, I dont control him and he does not control me ( an important point) we are a team and that goes right back to my original post on this topic.

you want to save a RB try good luck.

Dear Paulfromphuket,

Well I don't want to be misunderstood either.

If you took my post as suggesting that all farang control their thai lovers, then there's a misunderstanding. I most certainly did not mean that.

I've been here a very long time and like in any country I've seen many gay relationships start and finish quickly (and of course this is also true of hetero relationships in any country) however I have quite a few Thai/farang friends who are in very successful, very happy and equal partnerships.

My post was very specifically and only as a response to the comment "let them out of your sight and you will regret it."

I apologize if I have caused you a personal concern.

Regards

[BarryM]

After I numerous language courses, university and working in restaurants in the UK the only "business" or endeavour my ex ever showed any aptitude for was working as an escort in London. Unless you count theft and deception as a business. He even failed at that and is now wasting away in N Thailand somewhere without the means to return to the UK or pay for his combination therapy medication.

You can take the boy out the bar, you can't take the bar out of the boy.

[geriatrickid]

I'm surprised at some of you boys. The solution is EDUCATION.

Ask the bf if he wants to go to school. If he jumps at it and says yes, then you have something to work with. The best gift one can give is self sufficiency. Know what going to school does for some people? Gives them homework that keeps them busy, introduces them to good people and gives them a sense of purpose. Sure, the thai education system can be described as crap, but it's fine for someone of simple background. Basic discipline is taught. Even some knowledge is gained.

I have a friend that has a day job and goes to uni part time. No time for boozing it up, no time for partying. Perfect situation for the farang that has to leave thailand and worries about what the bf will do once he leaves. My friend knows a guy from his hometown that works in Paradise, and he sometimes is asked to go for a drink there. Guess what? he won't go. Ever since he started uni again, he doesn't have time and more importantly, he doesn't want to be seen there. he got himself a farang bf last year that lives in Europe. Unlike the stories we hear of cheating boys, this one doesn't.Work school and family occupy him. For recreation, he goes out with me and some chums every few weeks. His boyfriend doesn't worry about me, since he says, I'm not as good looking as him , but seriously, give a person a career or goal path and it will work with a good person.

I meet so many Thais yearning to go to school. Invest in that, and the person will find the job he wants and will remember you as the person that cared about his heart and soul and not just his buttocks. Even if he has a bachelors, let him upgrade his skills with a masters or a professional designation. Doing it part time if already employed keeps him out of trouble.

if the guy can't do this, then walk away, as its trouble in the making. You can't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear.

[BarryM]

Education in Thailand is seldom more than the pursuit of certificates to hang on the wall. Personal development doesn't figure - that would involve critical though and analysis - and it's not going to happen.

By all means enrol teerak in a uni/school, but think of it as day-care more than anything else. Hopefully he'll be too tired at the end of a long day in a lecture hall with 150 other dozing students to want to go clubbing. Or he might simply be reluctant to risk being spotted by his new peers hanging around bars in Paradise complex.

[scorecard]

I must agree with your comments about EDUCATION.

It's not for everyone, but there are young Thai men you yearn for better/more education. I have the proof.

- When we met, he had completed perhaps a total of three years of primary school education and no more, and most of what he had completed was in numerous temples and with large gaps.

- I asked him if he wanted to go to school, and he said "are you serious?" Then he said "Could I please go to English school for one month?"

- I indicated that I was serious about education very long-term, if that's what he wanted, and he cried his heart out. He immediately got serious

- He found a retired Thai teacher who took him back through Phatom (Primary School) for one year.

- He's completed adult Mathaom (Secondary School)

- He's completed about 6 years of English with focus on spoken and written English, including two semesters in Singapore

- He's almost finished a five year Prinya (Bachelor degree) and his GPA is pretty good

- He's able to earn a good part-time income from the strong skills he's already learned at university, but he makes sure this never interferes with his study or his home responsibilities

- When his lecture schedule has permitted he taught his subject as an after school activity at our local high school without pay.

- He rarely missed a school day or lecture, and when he did he made a good effort to get some details of what was taught, copy some notes, apologise to his teacher, etc.

- His ultimate aim is to go for his Ph.D. to say thank you to me (I have a Ph.D.)

- He met a delightful young lady at university and they are now in a very happy and stable relationship

- They have a young daughter, and her education is now the absolute first priority in their lives.

[Ijustwannateach]

That's a wonderful story, Scorecard!

I also know of guys- though not guys from the commercial sex scene- who have 'caught up' on their education- even on their own- but not from quite so far behind.

It is possible for really, really determined young people to catch up on their economic disadvantage, but only if they are pretty smart, pretty lucky, and believe in themselves pretty strongly- not to mention whether they have avoided a criminal record (not much use having the degree if all the jobs that a degree would be good for do police checks). That is also as much about whether or not their families suddenly need their labour as anything else personal about them.

[bobsaigon]

Moderator: If this is too long, don’t bother posting it. Just wrote it to fill up some spare time while spending an evening alone in California, thinking about my numerous mistakes with Thai boys.

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All of my comments are about boys I met in the bars of Bangkok, Pattaya and Phuket during the past ten years. I helped them to stop sex work with the aim of making them self-sufficient by way of education or small business startup. I never lived with any of them for any length of time because I have work in other countries, and, to be honest, because I am too much of a butterfly. If I had been staying with each of them, perhaps I could have insisted they do things differently, but….

Yes, many were thrilled at the prospect of going to “university” (even if this actually meant a vocational course), but most of them needed to complete high school first. The fact is that some of them were simply not equipped to handle an academic path. And some of them are manifestly unable to run even a small business.

Someone said it would have been better for me to donate money to orphanages, rather than make dubious investments in the future of ex-bar boys. Looking at the percentages of success with these boys, I believe that was good advice. There’s an old line about hitting yourself on the head with a hammer because it feels good when you stop. I guess that’s what I’ve been doing.

Nat: First Thai BF. 20 yr old uni student when we met. First tried to sell artificial flowers at a stall at the weekend market. That failed. Next opened a Thai dance school in Sri Racha with a Thai partner, putting the school in his partner’s name because of that boy’s connections with local police. That seemed to be going well until the partner wanted complete control of the business income (“for the sake of his family”), and figured out a way to get some kind of restraining order, preventing my BF from setting foot in the school. Next was a night time clothing stall on Silom, but after paying set up fees to the local mafia, he had to abandon the project to go to Khon Khaen to care for his dying mother. He finally got his bachelor’s degree and I finally tired of throwing money away on him. He now works as a customer service rep for a national phone company.

Cat: 24 yr old Pattaya bar boy, “between jobs” when I met him, he longed to return to the family farm in Chayabum. I helped out with that and eventually gave the family money to buy rice farm land. After a few years, when farm profits were down, Cat borrowed money from the bank using the farm as collateral, in order to open an ice cream / coffee shop. That failed rather quickly. Then he asked if I could send money to pay off the bank loan every month ( = buy the land for the second time). I declined.

Bee: Phuket bar boy, originally from Laos, had to buy a Thai birth certificate and ID card. I built a house for his family near Nong Khai, enrolled him in hair dresser school. Unknown to me, he opened a night market stall in Udon, which soon failed. Got a cryptic SMS from him saying that it was because of me that he was forced to do something. I guess that meant going back to bar work.

Bom: From Udon. Gave him money for tuition and room at a vocational school (hotel work). Six months later, his friend told me that he had dropped out of school. I went to the school and they confirmed that Mr. Bom studied for about two weeks before quitting. He just couldn’t absorb the content of the lessons. If he had told me that, we could have tried something else. But, after six months of deception, I ended things with him.

M: From a Mekong town. Paid for his final two years at uni in Bangkok, after which he was unable to find work. Ran in to him recently, working at his old bar in Suriwongse.

Yai: from Nong Khai area. Helped his family to build a couple of small shop-houses in his hometown. Enrolled him in a catch-up course so he could finish high school. A few months later, unable to function academically, he went to work in a Pattaya bar without consulting me. Eventually, I found out. A couple of years later, I encountered him working in a Phuket bar.

Ome: 19 yrs old. I helped his family to open a furniture shop near Pattaya. Ome’s brother was the wholesaler and Ome’s Mother and Father were the retailers. Major disagreement between brother and mother. Shop closed. Next project: mini-mart, back in Issan. Ome’s idea of running a business was to hire one his friends to do most of the work. His idea of a good location was a shop house owned by a relative (a year’s rent in advance, please), and the shop was between two other similar businesses. Closed after six. Now he is a second year uni student in Sakhon Nakhon. He better finish studies on time. I am fed up with him.

Kiti: 18 yrs old, currently living with the family in Ubon, rice farming. Can’t decide what he wants to do. Has not yet obtained a high school diploma.

Tor: Chiang Mai. King of Lies. Never held an honest job. Money I sent him was used to open a small clothing shop in CM. Failed. Claimed a series of illnesses until I was able to determine that he was in fine health. Now back at the bar in Pattaya, as a waiter (“not selling my body now”).

Jinda: Now at vocational school in Bangkok, in the middle of a four-year hotel work course. I believe that he will be good at this type of work.

Ad: Just turned 18 when I met him in Pattaya. Helped him to relocate to Korat where he studied hair dressing. Completed the course about six months ago, now working in a salon in Korat.

Aek: This year he finished study for his bachelor’s degree, Thai classical dance. Now teaching that in Pattaya. He’s a good dancer and a good teacher, though he seems dismayed at the prospect of living on a teacher’s salary.

Tin: Final year of uni. Very bright. Probably will be the most successful of all the boys.

Na: Started heavy construction work at 15 yrs of age in Pattaya. Met him at a bar in Bangkok when he was 20. Didn’t see him for a long time. Five years ago, met him again, helped him finish study for bachelor’s degree, and this year, for MBA. I think he’ll be good if he can ever find a job in this faltering economy.

There are/were others, but I guess you can draw some conclusions from the above.

[Jingthing]

There are/were others, but I guess you can draw some conclusions from the above.

Yeah, most uneducated Thai people from the lower economic classes STAY uneducated in the lower economic classes all their lives.

Edited July 5, 2009 by Jingthing