Bpraim1 Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 I am just curious as to how many men got to a bar and pick up a lady and then later marry them. With this question I also want the answer of a good marriage, You trust your partner Your partner trusts you You don't need to pay her off "IE" money for spa's, gold, and sorry I spent all night at the gogo bar mnoey You don't have a gig on the side You don't need a gig on the side She doesn't ask for money monthly She doesn't to to hurt or kill you " awake or in your sleep" You live like a normal married couple, well what normal is to the the flock anyway. I ask this question because daily on here there are men, crying... I have lost everything... She took the kids and wants money... She took my house... Her family wants XXXXX sin sod, but she has 16 kids with 5 different men. Realy this marriage will work! So on and so on.... Blah blah blah Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toybits Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 Bpraim1 - are you asking this because you are married to one? Just curious... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
webfact Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 I trust OP must make a decision and seeks moral support... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thaimate Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 Although not married to a bar girl but to a woman who worked in my partners office ,i have 2 friends that have been for many years ,the answer seems to be if you come over here on holiday and marry the first girl that tells you how handsome you are ,you being 50 plus and her 20 then you are going to have problems ,but my friends live here and actually courted their now wives ,took them out of the bar and spent time being with them before going and marrying them. bit like you would if you were at home ,meet ,stay together courting for a long time ,get married . not really rocket science is it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bpraim1 Posted July 3, 2009 Author Share Posted July 3, 2009 No , I am not! I had my fun playing around in Thailand, I seen may a man cry from a bar lady. I was my wifes first boy friend beyond she highschool puppy love. There was not sex on the ffirst or second date! I have been married now for 4 years and with her for 5 1/2 years. We have two beautiful children, and we make decsions together. She nor her family have ever asked for money! Sin Sod was up to me, as they could not put a price on there daughter. But wanted to make sure she would be loved and looked after. What sin sod I paid they gave back. My wife is from Issan, her family is not poor but not rich, They work hard and save. Does this anwser you question! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cognos Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 I can offer no advise ( or can I ???), because I married a non bg thai lady. We all know why so many farang marry bg's, TO GENERALIZE.. its the worst kept secret in LOS...farang come to LOS..go to bar..get drunk..get infatuated with BG..sex FIRST NIGHT..start to date her..like the good knight in shining armour to save her from herself..soon have many problems..THE GENERAL SYNDROM..BUT..even non bg thai wives, like all wives..need TLC and LOVING attention..bg or NOT.. and when they have mens..bg or NOT..BE CAREFUL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soutpeel Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 WOW only 5 responses....still waiting for the anally retentive, judgemental brigade to start.... To the OP rather irrelevant topic to discuss because, if you didnt already know...All TV members are married to Hi-So, Thai Chinese, whose familes are well connected in the goverment , all wives have a minumum of one degree, but the vast majority have double degrees, with a few Phd's thrown in for good measure... As we know none of our esteemed TV members frequent beers bar, thats for low life farangs or even worse visa runners.. Your last paragraph intrigues me...as who is to say the descriptions you give just apply to bargirls, known of this happening to farangs who have married so called Hi-So wives who have never been near a beerbar... Just because a wife hasnt come out of bar doesnt mean you will not be ripped off and lose everything...its not that clean cut.... Your question is full of generalisations Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imaneggspurt Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 Those that are dont want to admit it, fair enough, what about some comments from the failed ones, we will understand ! ..there must be a few of them ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imaneggspurt Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 In fact ill add, i married a non bg, she was possibly worse than any bg and a lunatic, lasted 18 months in 99-00,..i didnt give up and married a beautiful non bg ,now 8 years together ( since the failed one ) and no regrets, shes my best friend/lover and a great mother to our 6 year old, Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gary A Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 I worked with three other farangs building a new factory. All four of us married Thai women during the first and second year. That was in 1991/1992. Three of the girls were bar girls. Mine was an accountant with a university degree. Guess which marriage failed? My three friends are still happily married. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
submaniac Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 I don't know if I should chime in, since I am not even married (yet). But what I am seeing on TV is that alot of people are very happily married to a Thai (bar girl or not). The same people on TV who post about having a happy marriage in Thailand, are, interestingly some of the more intelligent posters on this forum. The people who complain about how psychotic their Thai wives/GF's are, how they got ripped off, or how they are going to dump their falang wife of 30 years and move in with a Thai girl who they have known for a week and who is 20 years younger then them, are generally posters who are new to this forum, and whose posts demonstrate a lack of proper English grammar or education. Funny how that works, isn't it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wefearourdespot Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 She doesn't ask for money monthly I guess you meant "daily" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunholidaysun1 Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 Marrying a BAR GIRL , what ever next - Marrying a Buffalo . Either one will eventually leave you in the Kob Khun Khrap Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toybits Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 Touchy issue right? Did you feel insulted when I asked you a direct question about whether your wife was a bargirl? So what business do you have asking other TV members whether their life partner was a bargirl or not? Are you going to give them valuable advice? What I am telling you is. .......! No , I am not!I had my fun playing around in Thailand, I seen may a man cry from a bar lady. I was my wifes first boy friend beyond she highschool puppy love. There was not sex on the ffirst or second date! I have been married now for 4 years and with her for 5 1/2 years. We have two beautiful children, and we make decsions together. She nor her family have ever asked for money! Sin Sod was up to me, as they could not put a price on there daughter. But wanted to make sure she would be loved and looked after. What sin sod I paid they gave back. My wife is from Issan, her family is not poor but not rich, They work hard and save. Does this anwser you question! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cpofc Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 OK, I will give you my 2 bobs worth. Based on nothing but personal experience. First visit here in 1970. I was married to a 'normal' Thai girl in Bangkok in September 85 after our first meeting in 82. We are approximately the same age and she could already speak some English in those days. She is from good family without any money ever changing hands (from me) whatsoever and none was ever asked for or expected. Strangely enough, in these days, Thais weren't like Filippinos, the average Thai was not busting their guts trying to get out of the Kingdom and to Farangland. Many would say if you want me, you come and live here. There wasn't email and internet, Cable/Sat TV/ Mobile Phones then though. Bottom line? The majority ended in grief. My wife has been a 'counseller' and 'yai' to them for years now. There are good and bad on both sides. I have known some blokes who were absolute no hoping bastards too! There are always going to be the warm and fuzzy 'success stories' but in reality the odds are against you. Especially when there is a large gap in ages. The stats are certainly in the negative. In a country like Australia where women's rights seem to be alot more equal to those of a man's, once a Thai girl becomes a resident/citizen and starts to get out and around and socialising with other Thai women in the know, she then gets to learn just what benefits are available to her should she decide to terminate the relationship, especially if there is a child involved. Last time I was back in Aust I got a phone call from the Police, A divorced thai girl we knew well, Ex Pat Pong, was going for a 2nd bite at a sexual harrassment charge at another Aussie bloke, after blowing her last big payout on the Poker Machines, a claim which was bullshit. These were not her only transgressions and this time the police were on to her. She had used my name as a previous employer. I told the police I would not have had her within 500 metres of my premises! Absolute poison she was and was also busy 'educating' other young thai girls she came into contact with. You can take the girl from the bar, but in many cases you cannot take the bar out of the girl, especially if she is a 'veteran'. One problem was that they all thought, as they still do, that every farang was a Millionaire, then they got to Australia only to find the bloke was a blue collar factory worker on a basic wage who had saved all year to give the ferret a run in Pattaya for 2 weeks! A big disappointment for them. I admit, I have been out of the loop for a few years now since i returned to the Kingdom to live full time, but I seriously doubt anything has changed. To be honest judging by the way Thai Society has changed I could only see things getting worse as they have become as greedy and consumer driven as we have. I have some really good friends here who are Bar Girls and Mama Sans, and I mean good friends, not gigs. Listening to their stories, I admit, I do have a laugh, but it makes them no less shameful. Its take no prisoners! I am sure there are those here, like me, who have experienced the same thing i have over the years. How many times have you been asked the question. 'What's it like being married to a Thai and taking them back home'. You could ramble on for hours couldn't you? But I don't have the time or the inclination anymore and just sum it up in 2 words - HARD WORK. If the only two indredients for your marriage is Sex (you) and Money (her) then you are going to have problems. I was in two minds whether to actually post this, but why not. I am about as 'qualified' as any I guess. I am ready to get beaten and howled down by the true lovers of the world though. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
onnut Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 No , I am not!I had my fun playing around in Thailand, I seen may a man cry from a bar lady. I was my wifes first boy friend beyond she highschool puppy love. There was not sex on the ffirst or second date! I have been married now for 4 years and with her for 5 1/2 years. We have two beautiful children, and we make decsions together. She nor her family have ever asked for money! Sin Sod was up to me, as they could not put a price on there daughter. But wanted to make sure she would be loved and looked after. What sin sod I paid they gave back. My wife is from Issan, her family is not poor but not rich, They work hard and save. Does this anwser you question! same for me, except we only have one child, for now. oh yeah, and she makes the decisions Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robblok Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 I don't know if I should chime in, since I am not even married (yet). But what I am seeing on TV is that alot of people are very happily married to a Thai (bar girl or not). The same people on TV who post about having a happy marriage in Thailand, are, interestingly some of the more intelligent posters on this forum. The people who complain about how psychotic their Thai wives/GF's are, how they got ripped off, or how they are going to dump their falang wife of 30 years and move in with a Thai girl who they have known for a week and who is 20 years younger then them, are generally posters who are new to this forum, and whose posts demonstrate a lack of proper English grammar or education. Funny how that works, isn't it? I did mind you chime in, but lacking proper English grammar does not mean they don't have a good education. I am sure there are lots of Thais, French, (older) Germans, an so on and so on, who have a good education but are not great in English grammar. So i would not use English grammar as a measurement of someones intelligence. I would never marry a bar girl myself but had a lot of grief with my first Thai wife who was no bar girl (just a witch from hel_l after a year). I think percentage wise your marriage has a higher chance to fail if you marry a bar girl. But if someone wants to take the risk i wont judge them. But they should not come crying on the forum after wards. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnGotti Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 (edited) i find this common thread pathetic. Congrats on not marrying a prostitute! Do you want a cookie? Can you tie your own shoelaces? That's worth another cookie! Edited July 3, 2009 by JohnGotti Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nurse Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 For westerners that live in Thailand for a long time, their views change, the opportunity to meet people outside of entertainment areas increase also. For westerners who are here for a 3 week holiday in Pattaya the chances of meeting a Thai woman other than one from the entertainment areas are small, understand that Thai women also don't want a relationship with a western man who will not be back till next year, so bargirls will be great companion for the westerner whilst here on his holiday, and if he falls in love then that's great for him, many people here seem to think love is something that only happens between people who follow certain rules, it matters not to the people in love. Yet, many westen men will come to Thailand on holiday and fall in love, I don't think it's bad, I find it cute. And good luck to the people involved, many westerners may be unhappy in their own countries because they are lonely, they can go to poorer countries and attract a partner because of financial security, no different to an old movie star having a 19 year old model girlfriend in Hollywood. Everyone is after something in a relationship, wether it's financial security, a house, sex, trophy wife, gifts, travel, or even love. Many westerners meet bargirls and good luck to both of them people, they will need good luck, as ALL marriages have a chance of ending in divorce, whatever country or background, look at stats for western countries, high divorce rate, no bargirls in sight, still high marriage failure. If you can find someone you truley love, you won't care if they are rich or poor, bargirl or nurse, asian or western, you will be in love and won't care either way. Better to love than not love at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
473geo Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 So if nobody wants to marry a bar girl, and the majority of BG marriages are doomed to failure......... There must be hundreds of thousands of available bar girls/ex bar girls all over Thailand........ What then happens to them???? aaahhhhh........enter the rich farang on vacation....... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TexasRanger Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 People actually marry hookers? I thought that was an urban myth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saintofsilence Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 For westerners that live in Thailand for a long time, their views change, the opportunity to meet people outside of entertainment areas increase also.For westerners who are here for a 3 week holiday in Pattaya the chances of meeting a Thai woman other than one from the entertainment areas are small, understand that Thai women also don't want a relationship with a western man who will not be back till next year, so bargirls will be great companion for the westerner whilst here on his holiday, and if he falls in love then that's great for him, many people here seem to think love is something that only happens between people who follow certain rules, it matters not to the people in love. Yet, many westen men will come to Thailand on holiday and fall in love, I don't think it's bad, I find it cute. And good luck to the people involved, many westerners may be unhappy in their own countries because they are lonely, they can go to poorer countries and attract a partner because of financial security, no different to an old movie star having a 19 year old model girlfriend in Hollywood. Everyone is after something in a relationship, wether it's financial security, a house, sex, trophy wife, gifts, travel, or even love. Many westerners meet bargirls and good luck to both of them people, they will need good luck, as ALL marriages have a chance of ending in divorce, whatever country or background, look at stats for western countries, high divorce rate, no bargirls in sight, still high marriage failure. If you can find someone you truley love, you won't care if they are rich or poor, bargirl or nurse, asian or western, you will be in love and won't care either way. Better to love than not love at all. Good Post ,I don't discriminate about what work a person has done before it is between the couple and good luck to them if they can have a long and successful relationship unfortunately the odds of having one are not good if you jump in without caution or research. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nurse Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 People actually marry hookers? I thought that was an urban myth. Then you have not lived in Thailand very long or are registered blind. Many poorer girl who worked in the bar before now have western husbands, where do you think they meet them, maybe the ricefield ? If western men did not go to Bars, there would be no bargirls. If western men enjoyed rice firelds there would be no bargirls, western men go to bars, the girls are there too. How about western women who meet Beach boys in Thailand, if western women did nopt go to beaches, there woul;d be no Beach boy to meet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huey Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 I think most guys that do, really don't want to talk about it. I have met a few and they all tend to confess to you about it behind closed doors with something that sounds like "You know it's just their way of escapeing and finding a better life......". I just nod and smile. It's their bed, they made it and they are the only ones that gotta sleep in it. I'm just glad it aint me. I look at from a very simple perspective, values you may have learned as a child, when your finished with playing with something put it back were you found it. If you find a prostitute in a bar, leave her there, don't try to make her a good wife. And on the flip side if you find a good woman, don't get with her if you can give her a good life and treat her right. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnGotti Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 (edited) on the flip side, if she is much younger than you, then well.... she probably doesnt really think ur handsome. perhaps the point of all these threads... so you can convince yourselves of something. Edited July 3, 2009 by JohnGotti Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huey Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 People actually marry hookers? I thought that was an urban myth. Then you have not lived in Thailand very long or are registered blind. Many poorer girl who worked in the bar before now have western husbands, where do you think they meet them, maybe the ricefield ? If western men did not go to Bars, there would be no bargirls. If western men enjoyed rice firelds there would be no bargirls, western men go to bars, the girls are there too. How about western women who meet Beach boys in Thailand, if western women did nopt go to beaches, there woul;d be no Beach boy to meet. <deleted>??? you lost your mind. If westren men didn't go to bars there would be no bar girls????? Thai men DOMINATE the industry here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nurse Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 People actually marry hookers? I thought that was an urban myth. Then you have not lived in Thailand very long or are registered blind. Many poorer girl who worked in the bar before now have western husbands, where do you think they meet them, maybe the ricefield ? If western men did not go to Bars, there would be no bargirls. If western men enjoyed rice firelds there would be no bargirls, western men go to bars, the girls are there too. How about western women who meet Beach boys in Thailand, if western women did nopt go to beaches, there woul;d be no Beach boy to meet. <deleted>??? you lost your mind. If westren men didn't go to bars there would be no bar girls????? Thai men DOMINATE the industry here. As Englishmen dominate the bar scene in England and German men in Germany, such a surprise. This is about Western men in Thailand , not Thai men in Thailand, sorry if I have it wrong. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tmd5855 Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 Mia and I are now 2 years, 4 months together. She appeared in a bar I used to pop into and noticed her straight away as a stranger. (Yes I am a bar frequenter, so maybe or are a low life) Could speak very poor English but my Thai was the same. With living in Pattaya and working offshore have seen many well paid and well educated guys lose all common sense and sense of proportions to thai females. I was terrified and amazed when I let her move into my home when I went back to work. Do 4wks on/off. Came back all was good so took it slowly. Cannot wish for better, go up North to her parents every 2 months for a week, always made me welcome. 19 years difference I am 53, maybe an old fool. But happy as a sandboy. Yes you can have a success............................but, I were living here for 3+ years enjoying life as a child would in a sweetie shop. Seen many a strong man cry over these girls, whom they had met on a three week holiday. Feel sorry for them. My view, you want success you need to learn Thai, live here, spend time at her parents farm with Thai facilities. You can do that your on the right track. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nurse Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 Not one person here has a girl from a bar so far, so why worry, it is rare. I'm surprised. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TexasRanger Posted July 3, 2009 Share Posted July 3, 2009 People actually marry hookers? I thought that was an urban myth. Then you have not lived in Thailand very long or are registered blind. Or possibly a little sarcastic? Are you seriously that retarded? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now