Good Ex-pat?

[Thomas_Merton]

Elsewhere in this forum (biting my tongue, I must nod my head to “The Gentleman Scamp”) in “Those back Home” there is a discussion about what the folks back home think of ex-pats.

The general consensus seems to have been best expressed by “SeavisionBurma”:

We can educate our friends on the reality of expat life in Thailand (or where we are), but in truth - we are here because we are a different kind of person to those we have left behind.

What I would like to know is: what are those special qualities that make ex-pats different from those who are not?

I have been an ex-pat (apart from the last 14 months) since 1972. What I have thought separated me from those back home was an intense curiosity in all things.

In the very few occasions I have associated with other British ex-pats, it has been my impression that curiosity was very long from their raison d’etre. Far from it, most seemed embroiled in some sort of life style reflecting either characters from “The Lotus Eaters” or projecting a nostalgia for the never existing homeland as depicted in “Miss Marples” TV shows.

What do you think? Why are you a long term ex-pat? What qualities separate you from those who stay at home?

[Rinrada]

I have always found that about 50% of Expats are running away from trouble (usually of the strifevariety ) 40% have one foot on a bar of soap and are sliding headlong straight into it while the last 10 % are Normal..............like me

[SeaVisionBurma]

I'm sure I fall into Rinrada's 10 % of normals??

Thomas - I like your reference to curiosity. Everyone is curious in some form or other - but its possible that curiosity for some short term travellers is overwhelmed at some point by the negative aspects of travel: 'This hotel is awful' ; 'Can't stand these taxi drivers' ; 'Why do we have to wait?' ; Can't anybody speak English (insert your language) here?' ; 'Why is there fuel p!ss!ing out of the wings of this Phuket Air 747?' etc

All long term expats seem to have tolerance - yes, even those that have short tempers and shout a lot.

In my own case, for those of you who are not aware (and for those of you that give a d@mn!) - I am possibly an expat at an extreme. As well as living in a different country for long periods - I have the added burden of having to do it in an isolated place. As a pearl farm manager, I forego the freedom of getting out to a pub or restaurant when I feel the urge, or mingling with other expats, or just being away from my island prison.

While I dont consider myself anything special - I would like to think I have the ability to tolerate a lot of hardship.

(just reading that back to myself, what a load of self contrived wallop - I like to work hard and play hard like anyone else, and hence me getting on a bender everytime I reach the city )

[penelope]

Why are you a long term ex-pat?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

In LOS : Earn more, save more, spend less. Weather is not bad either.

[pnustedt]

I remember as a kid reading obituaries in my local newspaper (in UK). Invariably there would be someone who had died in old age - born locally, went to the local schools, got a job in the local mill, went on hol. to the nearby seaside town during wakes week with people from work, married a local girl in the local church, died in the local hospital, and finished off in the local crematorium.

I knew that wasn't for me.

I think the most important quality needed to be a good expat is self confidence - the confidence to do something outside the normal social support systems.

[Neeranam]

I don't think that I am curious but I get bored very easily.

Rebeliousness too.

I have rebelled against almost everything in my past.

One way to rebel against the country and govt. and people in your home country is to leave.

Flexibilty, is important. It is obvious to me about the people I know, who have been posted here through work without a choice and those who came by themselves.

How many expats are anarchists, I wonder.

[thaihome]

One of the reasons I got into the construction business 30 years ago was because you rarely stay in one place for long as you are working yourself out a job every day you go to work.

Working overseas for the past 7 years is just a continuation of that attitude. The money being better is probably a major consideration in staying overseas as well.

TH

[The Gentleman Scamp]

What I would like to know is: what are those special qualities that make ex-pats different from those who are not?

What are those special qualities that make ex-pats different from those who are not what? ..Ex-pats?

I will say that the long term expats generally outshine most of the newbies.

Most young expats like myself have not embraced and blended into Thailand as well and many tend to be less relaxed.

Sometimes I am guilty of the above two but not, however, the third - which is respect for my host country and my elders, even if they are ex-pat website forum members who are unsympathetic to my cause and intolerant of my ramblings... I'm sure they realize deep down that not all 'youngsters' fit the stereotype that we all see coming to "our" Thailand as if it was a place to party at night and pretend to be interested during the day and not actually another country.

Edited April 12, 2005 by The Gentleman Scamp

[Ted]

I think you can seperate the ex-pats into 2 categories too.

The reluctant Ex-pat & Ex-pat for life whether at home or not

(A) The reluctant ex-pat

Overseas for work for at least one of the following two reasons

- More Money

- Career advancement

And only for these reasons

( Ex-pat for life whether at home or not

Love being away, differences in culture, world experiences etc etc. And its just these sort of expats who if they return home will always feel happier overseas.

I'm a headhunter by profession (opportunists note - not in Thailand!) and the amount of expats I hear from after only a few months back in their home countries seeking a new position back in Asia is phenominal.

[RamdomChances]

Flexability, a sence of adventure, self confidence, self reliance........of course I've never met anyone like that I'm just here for the sex

[Ted]

And I think its fair to say Thailand has less of the expats in the first category than elsewhere!

[penelope]

You also get alot of "expats", who in this day in age, with the swiftness and frequency of travel, move around alot. My wife and I (who both work from LOS)flip between Sydney and LOS like some people go to the corner shop for a bottle of milk. And have been doing so for a long time.I tend to asscoiate the term expat with permanence, ie: expatriate onself from their home nation. I view the asia-pacific region as my home.So in that sense, never really go anywhere

[banchang]

That nice man mr Blair taxed me till my pips squeeked! I was fed up paying for 14 year old single mothers houseing and breading expenses.So came over here with the wife and kids, best thing I ever did!

[kreon]

nice warm weather and companionship

although i must say i'm well off and have lived in asia for +15 years, i think its a great place for the mind and health, thai's are easy going and mind their own business, a reasonable cost of living, no taxes, no bureaucrats, easy to travel around the world and to do global business/investments here thanks to the internet

and i have the choice to see my family when the weather is warm in europe and us

[ProfessorFart]

The thing with Thailand is that it is an easy and appealing place to be an 'expat'

In this day and age with just a few grand in the bank and a state pension, or a batchelors degree or even just by being a native English speaker anyone can become an expat in Thailand despite recent tightening of the regulations.

Whether attracted by the women, the weather, the quality of life or whatever, the truth remains that Thailand will attract a wide spectrum of people wishing to put roots down there. Some good, some not so good.

For me personally I've spent periods as an expat in Thailand before. Sometimes enjoyable, sometimes frustrating but always a privilege.

Just to wander off topic slightly I'd like to look at the concept of being an expat in the 2000s.

I think in this day and age in Thailand being an expat has also become a mindset. People (self included) who spend time in their home country and time in Thailand still may see Thailand as home.

Most of our friends are there these days or even if our friends are not there all the time, Thailand is the unifying factor in which we find solidarity.

We all know what it is to sit for hours frustrated and choking in a Bangkok traffic jam, We know what it is to wander through Ayutthya in the morning mist before the heat of the day sets in, we know what it is to catch up with friends in our favourite bars, we know what it is to walk through the doors at Don Meuang into the heat and chaos after a period of absence at home; dizzy with euphoria at being back, to have that first Chang in the bar you've been dreaming about while drinking insipid beer in your drab local at home, to wake up on Thailand on that first morning back......... I could go on and on but I bet everyone who posts on this forum knows what I mean.

Edited April 12, 2005 by ProfessorFart

[banchang]

Exactly Professor well put

[Ted]

Agreed, nice one Professor.

Ravisher - have sent pm

[bkk_mike]

The breaking point that made me leave the UK was tax. specifically IR35...

Although that was just the breaking point. There were other reasons...

[The Gentleman Scamp]

We all know what it is to sit for hours frustrated and choking in a Bangkok traffic jam, We know what it is to wander through Ayutthya in the morning mist before the heat of the day sets in, we know what it is to catch up with friends in our favourite bars, we know what it is to walk through the doors at Don Meuang into the heat and chaos after a period of absence at home; dizzy with euphoria at being back, to have that first Chang in the bar you've been dreaming about while drinking insipid beer in your drab local at home, to wake up on Thailand on that first morning back......... I could go on and on but I bet everyone who posts on this forum knows what I mean.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I've yet to do the Ayutthya mist thing.

[marquess]

remember as a kid reading obituaries in my local newspaper (in UK). Invariably there would be someone who had died in old age - born locally, went to the local schools, got a job in the local mill, went on hol. to the nearby seaside town during wakes week with people from work, married a local girl in the local church, died in the local hospital, and finished off in the local crematorium.

I knew that wasn't for me.

I couldn't have put it better myself. When I would go to a pub, there was always so and so, who had been living in the area for 60 years and never wanted to go anywhere else. I always thought to myself, there must be more to it than that.

I always had a desire to live somewhere else, but I wasn't really sure where. When a woman did my Tarot cards, about 15 years ago, she said I would never make anything of myself in England or be happy, I would simply just get along. Years went by before I realised the truth of that. As stated earlier, I think most expats are bolder than their home contemporaries, more willing to chuck it in. Try something else. I don't know how long I will survive out here, but I won't be going back if I can help it.