Thai People's Adaptability And Preferences

[Jai Dee]

Have you ever stopped to think about how easily the Thais adapt to a new or different situation? Have you ever stopped to think about what they’d really prefer… what they’d rather be doing?

I see Thai’s every day… going to work… going to school… driving their motorcycs or songtheows or pickups or air-conditioned taxis… working as a car park attendant, or as a bank clerk, or a sales executive, or a cook in a noodle shop, or a hostess at a 5 star hotel, or even a bar girl (dare I say it?)…going about their everyday business.

They go to work, perform their work, eat and drink with their friends or work acquaintances, go home when they want, take care of their family and friends, and they are basically happy people. They talk on their mobile telephones to their friends and family and work acquaintances… check their emails… organise their social activities… and this is their day to day life… until they take a holiday.

Then, at holiday time in most cases, they return to their home village and their parents (and sometimes children), and usually lead a totally different lifestyle.

Gone is the air-conditioned working environment, and the traffic congestion, and the 7-11’s, and the late night entertainment venues, and the plethora of public transport options… they are now back in the village… with none of the trappings of modern city life.

So what’s village life all about? No air-conditioning… no mobile telephone coverage… no internet or email… dirt floors under and around the house… chickens and dogs roaming freely around… cold water splash type showers from a plastic basin/bowl drawn from a concrete tub … no pressurised bum-guns…. no toilet paper… waking up before 6:00am in the morning when the head man makes his daily announcements over the village loudspeaker system (that is of course, if the crowing roosters don’t wake you up first) … eating whilst sitting on the floor with their friends and family, sending a younger person out in the evening with 30 baht to buy a bag of ice and some more pork and salad… going to bed before 10:00pm because 1) they’re tired, and 2) there’s nothing else to do… etc.

And, from my observations… they are perfectly happy in the village as they are in their “income-earning” role, if not more so. They adapt… and are equally at home, if not more so, living a simplistic village style existence as they are in the city… and are happy.

For example, and I’ll give you three different environments and situations… my missus is equally content and at ease, and happy, whether she’s 1) wearing her diamonds and an YSL evening gown drinking champagne at an embassy function in BKK, or 2) wearing a T-shirt and jeans in a Walking Street open café drinking beer with me and my work mates, or 3) wearing a sarong (and nothing else) and sweeping the dust from the wooden steps of our/her family house in the village in Isaan.

When I stop to think about it… it never ceases to amaze me… how adaptable she is… how at peace she is… and how happy she is… she simply adapts to whatever the situation or environment. How does she do it and what does she prefer?... I don’t honestly know… and I’ve never asked her. Would she rather be doing something else?

She is not unique… I know… because I’ve shared similar circumstances with some of my Thai workmates, as well as their families.

Is your partner like that?

[TheAceFace]

Good post, my missus and family are exactly the same. However I think the city life is way more stressful to them especially in a working enviroment and sticking to a daily routine.

I wish I could be as easily adaptable, however there is no way I could settle in the village life, especially where my missus is from (Satgauw...spelling??) all village residents are permanently pi$$ed on plastic bags full of home brew, spending new year there was enough for me.

[johnh101]

Is your partner like that?

Very much so ! !

[daleyboy]

My wife is the same, she seems happier when she is at home in issan than when we were in Bangkok.

As for adapting to U.K life, she always surprises me. I think sometimes how difficult it must be for her to live here. Unlike most westeners who have travelled alot my wife had only ever been to bkk and her home area, she then comes to a strange country with no family or friends just me.

She went to college for a year and made loads of new friends from around the World who were there to learn English as well,and she works full time in an Italian restaurant.

But what amazes me everyday is her command of English, for most of us it comes naturally, we dont have to think about it, but imagine if you had to speak Thai ALL the time!! i have the up-most respect for her speaking English all the time and all that thinking she must do before she opens her mouth to say something. I know how hard it must be for her as when we are in Thailand i do my best to speak Thai but i have to admit i couldnt do it all the time as my Thai just isnt good enough and i dont think will ever be

[buadhai]

I will be forever grateful for the adaptability of my partner. I wish I could emulate her state of calm through change, diversity and occasional conflict. She takes it all in stride, does what has to be done and never complains or states any wish for anything different or better. She's just as comfortable here in her parents' home in Korat as she was in our apartment on Saipan. She slides easily and effortlessly between Thai and English and seems untroubled by my ignorant inability to do better in her native tongue. She takes my complaints in stride, never bugs me about the three or four beers I have every night (in spite of the fact that her family doesn't drink) and stoically puts up with all the other quirks, imperfections and baggage that come with me, her 55 year-old other half.

[The Gentleman Scamp]

Good post - you have short changed yourself putting this here in HKK.

This is a General Topic.

[daleyboy]

Good post - you have short changed yourself putting this here in HKK.

This is a General Topic.

I agree scampy MODS move to general topics PLEASE

[Jai Dee]

This is a General Topic.

If you guys think so... as far as I'm concerned, a post is a post... and I'm not looking for rewards or brownie points for putting it in the right section or not... I just felt that it might get a few more honest answers in HKK rather than General.

However, if the mods feel it should be moved... then feel free.

Great replies so far by the way...

Now... where are your replies Scamps and dalyboy?

[daleyboy]

This is a General Topic.

If you guys think so... as far as I'm concerned, a post is a post... and I'm not looking for rewards or brownie points for putting it in the right section or not... I just felt that it might get a few more honest answers in HKK rather than General.

However, if the mods feel it should be moved... then feel free.

Great replies so far by the way...

Now... where are your replies Scamps and dalyboy?

I think it will get more interest in the general section that was all As for my post look up from here for a couple of posts and you will see mine something tells me someone isnt reading all the replies

Edited July 5, 2005 by daleyboy

[Jai Dee]

something tells me someone isnt reading all the replies    

Oops!!!

My missus scolds me sometimes for not listening to her too...

[daleyboy]

something tells me someone isnt reading all the replies    

Oops!!!

My missus scolds me sometimes for not listening to her too...

Now you naughty boy make sure you listen or someone will put you over their knee and spank your bum

[Jai Dee]

something tells me someone isnt reading all the replies    

Oops!!!

My missus scolds me sometimes for not listening to her too...

Now you naughty boy make sure you listen or someone will put you over their knee and spank your bum

Now that's more the sort of comment I'd expect in HKK...

Enough... back on topic... any more members out there that would like to share?

[The Gentleman Scamp]

Now... where are your replies Scamps and dalyboy?

I haven't read it yet, it's too long for HKK and I only come in here to read the silly stuff.

When moved to the appropriate forum where it belongs then I shall read it.

I have, however, read your signature.

[gburns57au]

Have you ever stopped to think about how easily the Thais adapt to a new or different situation?  Have you ever stopped to think about what they’d really prefer… what they’d rather be doing?

I see Thai’s every day… going to work… going to school… driving their motorcycs or songtheows or pickups or air-conditioned taxis… working as a car park attendant, or as a bank clerk, or a sales executive, or a cook in a noodle shop, or a hostess at a 5 star hotel, or even a bar girl (dare I say it?)…going about their everyday business.

They go to work, perform their work, eat and drink with their friends or work acquaintances, go home when they want, take care of their family and friends, and they are basically happy people.  They talk on their mobile telephones to their friends and family and work acquaintances… check their emails… organise their social activities… and this is their day to day life… until they take a holiday.

Then, at holiday time in most cases, they return to their home village and their parents (and sometimes children), and usually lead a totally different lifestyle.

Gone is the air-conditioned working environment, and the traffic congestion, and the 7-11’s, and the late night entertainment venues, and the plethora of public transport options… they are now back in the village… with none of the trappings of modern city life.

So what’s village life all about?  No air-conditioning… no mobile telephone coverage… no internet or email… dirt floors under and around the house… chickens and dogs roaming freely around… cold water splash type showers from a plastic basin/bowl drawn from a concrete tub … no pressurised bum-guns…. no toilet paper… waking up before 6:00am in the morning when the head man makes his daily announcements over the village loudspeaker system (that is of course, if the crowing roosters don’t wake you up first) … eating whilst sitting on the floor with their friends and family, sending a younger person out in the evening with 30 baht to buy a bag of ice and some more pork and salad… going to bed before 10:00pm because 1) they’re tired, and 2) there’s nothing else to do… etc.

And, from my observations… they are perfectly happy in the village as they are in their “income-earning” role, if not more so.  They adapt… and are equally at home, if not more so, living a simplistic village style existence as they are in the city… and are happy.

For example, and I’ll give you three different environments and situations… my missus is equally content and at ease, and happy, whether she’s 1) wearing her diamonds and an YSL evening gown drinking champagne at an embassy function in BKK, or 2) wearing a T-shirt and jeans in a Walking Street open café drinking beer with me and my work mates, or 3) wearing a sarong (and nothing else) and sweeping the dust from the wooden steps of our/her family house in the village in Isaan.

When I stop to think about it… it never ceases to amaze me… how adaptable she is… how at peace she is… and how happy she is… she simply adapts to whatever the situation or environment.  How does she do it and what does she prefer?... I don’t honestly know… and I’ve never asked her. Would she rather be doing something else?

She is not unique… I know… because I’ve shared similar circumstances with some of my Thai workmates, as well as their families.

Is your partner like that?

Adaptability is easy when the changes in life are positive or positives can be found in a situation....

Why are they happy to go back to a village with no mod cons??....a lot of them dont have mod cons in the city either.....their usual city accommodation is usually cold showers, no A/C and cramped quarters that are shared with others. In the village they have open spaces, many are seeing their kids and family for the first time in months. Also this was the life they were brought up in, so it is where they can feel comfortable.

The adaptability to moving O/S....they are moving to a better life...where life is easier, where they are not looked on as second class. Who wouldnt adapt to that.

But when the changes are not so positive then the situation differs...Girls crying their eyes out for days on end because they have been forced to find work that they would rather not be doing.

Of course you dont see this....because it is done in private...you may sense them being a bit down but they just say "mai penh rai"....and go about their daily thing. An ex Thai gf of mine who lives here used to sit out in the back patio where there are some ferns and bushes....because it reminded her of the village in Thailand

...she had been here over 2 years and was still homesick.

[chownah]

I wouldn't say my wife is very adaptable. She likes living the village life and she likes everything to be the same way its always been. For example, I often work in the fields from 6pm to 7:30pm because it is cooler...at first this kind of upset her because everyone else's husband was home at 5:00 pm. She has accepted this because she understands that its cooler and that makes sense to her...but she'd rather have things just like everyone else. She really has little interest in learning to speak English better or to learn how to use the internet. She can adapt..but she'd rather not have to.

The workers who built our house...boy talk about difficulty adapting!!! Varying in small ways from the traditional way was a big deal....many of the men in my village won't work on my house because I want everything my way and its too much of a headache for them to do things differently.

Perhaps the difference in my experience and yours is that I live in the village with farmers who just live and stay here and who make up over half of the Thai population. You see the people in Bangkok who are actually a minority although its hard to believe this when your there.

[Boon Mee]

I've dragged my wife all over this planet and lived in some rough places due to my job as she's always adapted to everything.

It's been really amazing to me.

[bina]

there is a difference between adaptability and happiness;

the guys i see here adapt to ANY situation... crowded conditions, men only living situations in the middle of a desert, often not leaving their place of work for three years !!! bombs, wierd holidays, but u see their small gardens with thai veggies; karoake/satellite thai tv; eating on the floor, etc... when i go to thai workers houses, its like being in the villages again... they dont really adopt anything from their surroundings... you'll never find humous, pita, olives, chocolate spread (well rarely an;yway for that one), never ever hear regular radio/israeli sports, etc on tv....its like walking in to little italy or chinatown in american cities... i call these places 'little thailand'... people slaughtering chickens and pigs (in isreal!!) , pounding garlic and peppers for dinner, drinking, etc

they make do with what they have, improvise an amazing amount (if they dont have an ingredient, they make it themselves or use something in place of it), create order out of a very stressful situation, but attempt to maintain their 'own reality' so actaully when they go back its pretty much the same as it was here

all in all ,i can say i am always always impressed by how the thai workers live and maintain their thai way of living when far away from home.... for good or bad, since other cultures stress :when in rome do like the romans... or say 'so and so is'going native'...

and yet some people do change and do become unsatisfied with what 'used to be'... i think it will be hard for sompong to go back to his rinky dinky farm and work rice, when here he is already able to tell two junior (israeli) workers what to do in his place of work, where he makes major decisions, where much of what he IS used to is the opposite of what he WAS used to ...including hot showers, jumping in a car and going to the mall, etc....

but then most people are the same in that respect of sliding between two worlds... some find it very difficult and some love it be they thai, american british or israeli... country mouse or city slicker....

[Totster]

So what’s village life all about?  No air-conditioning… no mobile telephone coverage… no internet or email… dirt floors under and around the house… chickens and dogs roaming freely around… cold water splash type showers from a plastic basin/bowl drawn from a concrete tub … no pressurised bum-guns…. no toilet paper… waking up before 6:00am in the morning when the head man makes his daily announcements over the village loudspeaker system (that is of course, if the crowing roosters don’t wake you up first) … eating whilst sitting on the floor with their friends and family, sending a younger person out in the evening with 30 baht to buy a bag of ice and some more pork and salad… going to bed before 10:00pm because 1) they’re tired, and 2) there’s nothing else to do… etc.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

What an excellent description.... makes ya homesick does it not....?

Fantastic post BTW Jai Dee..

totster

[tuky]

For example, and I’ll give you three different environments and situations… my missus is equally content and at ease, and happy, whether she’s 1) wearing her diamonds and an YSL evening gown drinking champagne at an embassy function in BKK, or 2) wearing a T-shirt and jeans in a Walking Street open café drinking beer with me and my work mates, or 3) wearing a sarong (and nothing else) and sweeping the dust from the wooden steps of our/her family house in the village in Isaan.

It works both ways too JD, look at us for instance.

Are you just as happy in the village as you are on the golf course?

Can you sit on the floor and eat with your fingers out of the same dish as everyone else?

Do you ever drop a couple of ice cubes in your beer?

Do you ever buy something to eat from a street side vendor that would be banned by the health dept. back home?

Looking at it this way it is not such a great feat, but in reality you do have to give it to them, you have seen how far the local shop is from my house. All of 20 metres, and my wife rides the motorcy if she ever needs to go there That is what i call adaptation, adapting the available materials to gain her desired result.

However I must admit I was taken aback the first time I visited her childhood home, a corrugated iron shack stuck in the middle of a cess pit.

[Jai Dee]

When moved to the appropriate forum where it belongs then I shall read it.

Done... no excuses now Scampy...

I have, however, read your signature.

I was wondering when someone would spot that... well done!

... and ... touche!

What an excellent description.... makes ya homesick does it not....? 

Fantastic post BTW Jai Dee..

Thanks totster... I've been thinking about it for some time... and the night before last I was just sipping an ale on the balcony and thinking about my own ability (or lack of) to do the same...

It works both ways too JD, look at us for instance.

Are you just as happy in the village as you are on the golf course?

Can you sit on the floor and eat with your fingers out of the same dish as everyone else?

Do you ever drop a couple of ice cubes in your beer?

Do you ever buy something to eat from a street side vendor that would be banned by the health dept. back home?

Looking at it this way it is not such a great feat, but in reality you do have to give it to them, you have seen how far the local shop is from my house. All of 20 metres, and my wife rides the motorcy if she ever needs to go there      That is what i call adaptation, adapting the available materials to gain her desired result.

However I must admit I was taken aback the first time I visited her childhood home, a corrugated iron shack stuck in the middle of a cess pit. 

Yes to all your questions above tukyleith... but I am not as adaptable and comfortable with fitting in to those environments and she is in mine.

Can I stay in the village longer than a week? I doubt it... I'd be bored sh1tless!

And I'd be really hanging out for some farang food... I can only eat so much sticky rice and ground raw pork dripping in blood and mashed chillies.

And the way she is so gracious and helpful and friendly when we visit my family back in Oz is amazing... even when there are language difficulties or personal conflicts.

As Mike said earlier "I wish I could emulate her state of calm through change, diversity and occasional conflict"... awesome.

[Tornado]

My wife is very adaptable to anything, be it cooking western food, learning my ways of living, putting up with me not coming home for a few days or moving when I want to. Although it sounds like Im wearing the pants, I assure you I dont all the time - thats the way I like it.

There seems to be no boundaries when it comes to how we live or where we live, as long as it is Thailand most of the time , but I accept that and have let her have her way

I am the one trying to get her to live back in the village, but she is not keen, so I will go and live with mum if she dont want to . I think she is ok about it now as we are building a house with a shower

I feel blessed I have a wife as beautiful as I have, she shocks me everyday how commited she is to be with me. Then again, she dont have to work, has her own cash, car and everything a lady could want, including me - lucky bugger!

Edited July 6, 2005 by Tornado

[pnustedt]

I think that I am just as adaptable as my Thai wife in living environment - we currently live in a comfortable apartment in HK but visit her village for a couple weeks with no problems and intend to move there in a few years. I can find plenty to do. She doesn't stay as calm as me in a conflict!

What does amaze me is her ability to pick up languages - she speaks English and Cantonese (and of course Thai) fluently and flips from one to the other in group conversations. We went to Paris for a holiday and she was beginning to speak French within a couple of days.

The thing she does not do is take things for granted or consider herself better than anyone else - perhaps that is the most important thing in being accepted anywhere.